Hamas is fucking tore up bad

['Hamas' Jenkins]

What's up, knuckas??? I'm HAMMERED :p....LOL

[L.A. Chieffan]

lets hit up canal

[kysirsoze]

I'm workin on it

[crazycoffey]

I'm hammered too, but you don't see me making a thread out of it....

['Hamas' Jenkins]

yes...fucking wAAAAAAAAAAAAASTED!!!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

it's not about cock and ass and tits...and butthole pleasures. It's not about the rusty trombone and the dirty sanchez...the rainbow showers and the cameltoe slide. And the cincinnati bowtie. Or the pearl necklace. Or the jagged head dildos or the double decker pussies, the shitstained balls, the arabian goggles or the hot carl. It's not abou tthe cum swapping or the hanging brain. The rattlesnake wiggle, or the alligator fuckhouse. Donkey punch or the tea bagging!!

[crazycoffey]

so what, I'm outtie. Time for CrazyCoffey to go get some ass. See ya bitches......

[kysirsoze]

it's not about cock and ass and tits...and butthole pleasures. It's not about the rusty trombone and the dirty sanchez...the rainbow showers and the cameltoe slide. And the cincinnati bowtie. Or the pearl necklace. Or the jagged head dildos or the double decker pussies, the shitstained balls, the arabian goggles or the hot carl. It's not abou tthe cum swapping or the hanging brain. The rattlesnake wiggle, or the alligator ****house. Donkey punch or the tea bagging!!

You might as well make this your sig, I see you post it so much. :)

[kysirsoze]

I hereby nominate this thread for the HoC!!!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa167/BlackB0nd/rockeyebrows.gifI hereby nominate this thread for the HoC!!!

[Pioli Zombie]

Its about love. Its about connection. Its about a massive hangover later.
Posted via Mobile Device

[DenverChief]

it's not about cock and ass and tits...and butthole pleasures. It's not about the rusty trombone and the dirty sanchez...the rainbow showers and the cameltoe slide. And the cincinnati bowtie. Or the pearl necklace. Or the jagged head dildos or the double decker pussies, the shitstained balls, the arabian goggles or the hot carl. It's not abou tthe cum swapping or the hanging brain. The rattlesnake wiggle, or the alligator ****house. Donkey punch or the tea bagging!!


you forgot mooseknuckle

[burt]

It will be hours before Hamas wakes and reads this.

[2112]

I liked the old Hamas that was pissed off 24/7 a lot better than this new post Herm era Hamas


ROFL

[Sure-Oz]

i wish i was fugged up nucka

[seclark]

i wish i was fugged up nucka

it's something you have to dedicate yourself to.
sec

[Buck]

This thread has such potential.

[Stanley Nickels]

Oh man, this hangover is HIGH fucking MAINTENANCE

[Tiger's Fan]

pussy

['Hamas' Jenkins]

My friends dropped me off at home last night, with Steak and Shake in hand. I ate a double bacon and cheese steakburger, and a whole order of chicken tenders along with two orders of fries. Decided I was still hungry, and cooked up some frozen steak fries. After that, I felt bad about my poor food choices, so I went out in the garage and ran on the elliptical for about 30 minutes, then ran a lap around the neighborhood (.9 miles). Finally passed out sometime around 6 am.

Sadly, I didn't pee on or date rape anyone, nor did I feel the need to jam a toothpick in my peehole.

I'm pounding the shit out of some Pepto right now, though.

[DeezNutz]

My friends dropped me off at home last night, with Steak and Shake in hand. I ate a double bacon and cheese steakburger, and a whole order of chicken tenders along with two orders of fries. Decided I was still hungry, and cooked up some frozen steak fries. After that, I felt bad about my poor food choices, so I went out in the garage and ran on the elliptical for about 30 minutes, then ran a lap around the neighborhood (.9 miles). Finally passed out sometime around 6 am.

I'm pounding the shit out of some Pepto right now.

ROFL

From fucked up to metro in .25 seconds.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

ROFL

From fucked up to metro in .25 seconds.

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/uploaded_images/DBOLdNo7-707299.jpg

[Hootie]

My friends dropped me off at home last night, with Steak and Shake in hand. I ate a double bacon and cheese steakburger, and a whole order of chicken tenders along with two orders of fries. Decided I was still hungry, and cooked up some frozen steak fries. After that, I felt bad about my poor food choices, so I went out in the garage and ran on the elliptical for about 30 minutes, then ran a lap around the neighborhood (.9 miles). Finally passed out sometime around 6 am.

Sadly, I didn't pee on or date rape anyone, nor did I feel the need to jam a toothpick in my peehole.

I'm pounding the shit out of some Pepto right now, though.

Can't argue with the food choice...

Can argue with the date rape choice.

[Pablo]

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/uploaded_images/DBOLdNo7-707299.jpgKill it with fire.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

Can't argue with the food choice...

Can argue with the date rape choice.

A little cross thread humor never hurt anyone other than H4L0

[Hootie]

I don't get two things in this world...

MMA and bodybuilders...

MMA - why do people like that gay ass shit? My friends and I touch each others dicks and even we think MMA is fucking totally gay.

Bodybuilding - why would ANYONE want to look like that? Women find that attractive? You feel good about yourself? Holy christ I don't get it.

[Hootie]

A little cross thread humor never hurt anyone other than H4L0

drunk Steak and Shake is my second favorite drunk food after La Bamba...

La Bamba is amazing and I know none of you have probably heard of it but OH EM GEE!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I don't get two things in this world...

MMA and bodybuilders...

MMA - why do people like that gay ass shit? My friends and I touch each others dicks and even we think MMA is fucking totally gay.

Bodybuilding - why would ANYONE want to look like that? Women find that attractive? You feel good about yourself? Holy christ I don't get it.

Why to bodybuilding:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/4huK3lshlME&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/4huK3lshlME&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[Crush]

I don't get two things in this world...

MMA and bodybuilders...

MMA - why do people like that gay ass shit? My friends and I touch each others dicks and even we think MMA is ****ing totally gay.

Bodybuilding - why would ANYONE want to look like that? Women find that attractive? You feel good about yourself? Holy christ I don't get it.


Muay Thai FTW

[DeezNutz]

"I'm cumming day and night."

If I were him, that would have been my campaign slogan.

[Hootie]

in a totally non related note, and only because I'm viewing this thread at this time...Dempster should fucking walk Pujols here...if there is EVER a base open and this guy is up...I walk him every time (but I'm a huge puss)...time to give this guy the Bonds treatment...he's too good.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

My friends dropped me off at home last night, with Steak and Shake in hand. I ate a double bacon and cheese steakburger, and a whole order of chicken tenders along with two orders of fries. Decided I was still hungry, and cooked up some frozen steak fries. After that, I felt bad about my poor food choices, so I went out in the garage and ran on the elliptical for about 30 minutes, then ran a lap around the neighborhood (.9 miles). Finally passed out sometime around 6 am.

Sadly, I didn't pee on or date rape anyone, nor did I feel the need to jam a toothpick in my peehole.

I'm pounding the shit out of some Pepto right now, though.

I want you to envision the following:

A greasy pork sandwich served in a dirty ashtray with a can of Schafer Light that has been roasting in the 90-degree sun for 8 hours.

Chow down!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

One time for 50 bucks I drank a can of PBR Light that had been outside in a cooler for 8 months.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

One time for 50 bucks I drank a can of PBR Light that had been outside in a cooler for 8 months.

Even through seasonal changes, that's still a sweet and easy 50.

Provided you washed the can off first.:D

[CrazyPhuD]

One time for 50 bucks I drank a can of PBR Light that had been outside in a cooler for 8 months.

Yea but as long as it'd never been opened it's not that bad. You're not going to have shit growing in it, all that will happen is that it's going to be flatter than a chinese tit.

Now that reminds me of college where one of my fraternity brothers came downstairs one morning after a party, pissed by the number of half drunk beers on the bar/pong table, he proceeded to start killing all the wounded soldiers. Now that would be some nasty shit, because you never know when you were going to get one someone ashed into.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Yea but as long as it'd never been opened it's not that bad. You're not going to have shit growing in it, all that will happen is that it's going to be flatter than a chinese tit.

Now that reminds me of college where one of my fraternity brothers came downstairs one morning after a party, pissed by the number of half drunk beers on the bar/pong table, he proceeded to start killing all the wounded soldiers. Now that would be some nasty shit, because you never know when you were going to get one someone ashed into.

SPALDING!!! :cuss::D

['Hamas' Jenkins]

Yea but as long as it'd never been opened it's not that bad. You're not going to have shit growing in it, all that will happen is that it's going to be flatter than a chinese tit.

Now that reminds me of college where one of my fraternity brothers came downstairs one morning after a party, pissed by the number of half drunk beers on the bar/pong table, he proceeded to start killing all the wounded soldiers. Now that would be some nasty shit, because you never know when you were going to get one someone ashed into.

It had been sitting in cooler water for the whole time and had mud on the top of the can.

I had 30 mins to drink it and couldn't puke. Fortunately, I didn't die from a slime mold.

I once saw a guy drink a cup full of after party beers and cigarette butts for 20 bucks.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

It had been sitting in cooler water for the whole time and had mud on the top of the can.

I had 30 mins to drink it and couldn't puke. Fortunately, I didn't die from a slime mold.

I once saw a guy drink a cup full of after party beers and cigarette butts for 20 bucks.

LMAO

SPALDING!!!:cuss:ROFL

[Pablo]

I ate a grow beast that had been soaking in a Subway cup of carbonated water over a 3 day period for $2 once. That was tasty.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I ate a grow beast that had been soaking in a Subway cup of carbonated water over a 3 day period for $2 once. That was tasty.

WTF is a grow beast?

[bevischief]

What about tonight?

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I ate a grow beast that had been soaking in a Subway cup of carbonated water over a 3 day period for $2 once. That was tasty.

What is a "grow beast"?

[Delano]

Grow beast:

http://store.rebeccas.com/store/images/PJ290.jpg

Worst toys EVAR.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

What about tonight?

I never drink on consecutive nights.

[Pablo]

WTF is a grow beast?It was basically like a little sponge/eraser type deal that was about as big as a pencil eraser. But when you soaked it in water it would swell up really big, like to the size of a mouse. They were like dinosaur shaped.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I never drink on consecutive nights.

Pussy!:D

[Pablo]

Grow beast:

http://store.rebeccas.com/store/images/PJ290.jpg

Worst toys EVAR.Thank you fella.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

Pussy!:D

I will wear those lips with pride.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

It was basically like a little sponge/eraser type deal that was about as big as a pencil eraser. But when you soaked it in water it would swell up really big, like to the size of a mouse. They were like dinosaur shaped.

You must have really wanted that two bucks.

[Delano]

Thank you fella.

I bet the resultant bowel movement was noteworthy.

[Pablo]

You must have really wanted that two bucks.Yeah, I was like 13 and on a church camp trip.

We were driving back down from BFE Iowa and I think I spent all the money I brought with me on beef jerky, and I didn't eat at the church camp because the food was ****ing terrible.

So, we stopped at Burger King and my friends gave me $2 for a cheeseburger if I ate it.

Eating it wasn't that bad..the really shitty part was drinking the carbonated water that had been sitting under the seat in a van over the weekend.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I will wear those lips with pride.

ROFL

Man, that's the ONLY way I can get right after a true bender. I gotta' tell ya'; drunk on drunk is a fun, fun place to be!

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Yeah, I was like 13 and on a church camp trip.

We were driving back down from BFE Iowa and I think I spent all the money I brought with me on beef jerky, and I didn't eat at the church camp because the food was fucking terrible.

So, we stopped at Burger King and my friends gave me $2 for a cheeseburger if I ate it.

ROFL Greatest cheeseburger EVAH!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I saw a guy lick an ashtray for $2 once...same dude pissed his pants for $3....Hootie would have liked him.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I saw a guy lick an ashtray for $2 once...same dude pissed his pants for $3....Hootie would have liked him.

ROFLROFLROFL And there goes my St. Ides all over the fucking carpet!!!

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I found out last night that last week while I was in St. Louis for a bach. party that I spent the cab ride down to the Landing explaining what "The Stranger" was to our cab driver....

I fucking love The Stranger.

[RNR]

I saw a guy lick an ashtray for $2 once...same dude pissed his pants for $3....Hootie would have liked him.

I watched a guy eat a can of dog food for twenty bucks on a job site one time.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I watched a guy eat a can of dog food for twenty bucks on a job site one time.

That's awesome. I'd definitely eat a can of dog food for 20 bucks.

[RNR]

That's awesome. I'd definitely eat a can of dog food for 20 bucks.

ROFL You do know what they put in dog food right?

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I found out last night that last week while I was in St. Louis for a bach. party that I spent the cab ride down to the Landing explaining what "The Stranger" was to our cab driver....

I fucking love The Stranger.


You mean the novel?

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

ROFL You do know what they put in dog food right?

Chicken lips and anus?!?!?

[Pablo]

I watched a guy eat a can of dog food for twenty bucks on a job site one time.When my dad was dating this chick my brother and I decided to initiate her sons into our 'family'.

I was probably 17 and my brother was 15.

Her oldest son was 14, and her youngest was probably 11.

We beat the ever-living shit outta her oldest son Full Metal Jacket style with soap in a sock. It was great.

Then we made the youngest drink a bottle of liquid smoke for $5..it was great, until he puked all night and it smelled like BBQ in the bathroom the whole next day.

['Hamas' Jenkins]

You mean the novel?

I mean sitting on your hand until it goes to sleep and then masturbating w/ said hand.

[RNR]

Chicken lips and anus?!?!?

Things they will not put in hot dogs and lunch meat :eek:

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I mean sitting on your hand until it goes to sleep and then masturbating w/ said hand.

:eek:ROFL WTF????

[Delano]

Dutch Rudder > The Stranger

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Things they will not put in hot dogs and lunch meat :eek:

I bet that smells just great on the Foreman grill.

[Sully]

Things they will not put in hot dogs and lunch meat :eek:

So it's even more delicious than hot dogs and lunch meat?
Sign me up!

[CrazyPhuD]

ROFL You do know what they put in dog food right?

Fishsticks?

[Over-Head]

I'm hammered too, but you don't see me making a thread out of it....

Why not I just did!! 4321 :D

[Hootie]

my friend darren ate wet salmon canned cat food for $10

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I mean sitting on your hand until it goes to sleep and then masturbating w/ said hand.

You my friend need a high quality 2 month sabbatical to Holland:

Drink, Smoke, Fuck, Repeat.

I recommend Rotterdam; less tourists, 30% savings, and the ass is just as fine. Make it happen, live the dream!

[Simply Red]

http://i43.tinypic.com/dw8z5.jpg

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Yes! Just like that!

[Crush]

http://i43.tinypic.com/dw8z5.jpg



I am confused and strangely aroused.

[Simply Red]

hi 'Hamas', you still roun'?

[DaneMcCloud]

When my dad was dating this chick my brother and I decided to initiate her sons into our 'family'.

I was probably 17 and my brother was 15.

Her oldest son was 14, and her youngest was probably 11.

We beat the ever-living shit outta her oldest son Full Metal Jacket style with soap in a sock. It was great.

Then we made the youngest drink a bottle of liquid smoke for $5..it was great, until he puked all night and it smelled like BBQ in the bathroom the whole next day.

Uh, are you serious?

[Pablo]

Uh, are you serious?Yes, unfortunately so.

[Nzoner]

Yes, unfortunately so.

and yet another puke story :D

just got back from Kansas,went to the sis-in-laws wedding reception and think I drank myself sober

[Pablo]

and yet another puke story :D

just got back from Kansas,went to the sis-in-laws wedding reception and think I drank myself soberHaha..yeah.. trust me, I've got plenty of puke stories.

I actually went the Long Island route again tonite..but I just couldn't do it anymore..I didn't come close to getting tore up tonite.

Last nite however, after y'all left, I embarked on yet another binge. I actually quit drinking for about 2 hours got halfway sober, then entered a whole new realm of drunkness at about 3 a.m.

[Otter]

and yet another puke story :D

just got back from Kansas,went to the sis-in-laws wedding reception and think I drank myself sober

I just got back from nieces wedding reception. Good Lord am I getting old. I remember when this girl was in diapers and now my friends are complimenting her on her tits. She's a looker too - feisty Italian girl and I pity that poor husband. I really do. She would but Stalin to shame.

Had to stay reasonably sober for the drive back but had a hottie promising me a reward who's now passed out on the bad and I'm about to jerk off into a tissue.

I suck

[Nzoner]

Haha..yeah.. trust me, I've got plenty of puke stories.

I actually went the Long Island route again tonite..but I just couldn't do it anymore..I didn't come close to getting tore up tonite.

Last nite however, after y'all left, I embarked on yet another binge. I actually quit drinking for about 2 hours got halfway sober, then entered a whole new realm of drunkness at about 3 a.m.

Tonight I had crown and water,margaritas and blvd wheat and now having a chocolate shake,tomorrow is gonna be a bitch

[Nzoner]

I just got back from nieces wedding reception. Good Lord am I getting old. I remember when this girl was in diapers and now my friends are complimenting her on her tits. She's a looker too - feisty Italian girl and I pity that poor husband. I really do. She would but Stalin to shame.

Had to stay reasonably sober for the drive back but had a hottie promising me a reward who's now passed out on the bad and I'm about to jerk off into a tissue.

I suck

heh my niece caught the flower bouquet tonight,and she;s a looker as well,fortunately my mrs was my DD so I was able to drink all I wanted :)

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I just got back from nieces wedding reception. Good Lord am I getting old. I remember when this girl was in diapers and now my friends are complimenting her on her tits. She's a looker too - feisty Italian girl and I pity that poor husband. I really do. She would but Stalin to shame.

Had to stay reasonably sober for the drive back but had a hottie promising me a reward who's now passed out on the bad and I'm about to jerk off into a tissue.

I suck

ROFL

[Otter]

heh my niece caught the flower bouquet tonight,and she;s a looker as well,fortunately my mrs was my DD so I was able to drink all I wanted :)

I drank a red bull on the way back and now chugging water waiting for the buzz to wear off so I can go to bed.

How the March Madness Vegas trip go? Did you see Carlota? I was out there 2 years ago and she offered to hood me up with some Vegas inside clubs but just wound up getting sucked up in the Vegas whirlwind.

[Nzoner]

my little niece is all growed up

[Nzoner]

I drank a red bull on the way back and now chugging water waiting for the buzz to wear off so I can go to bed.

How the March Madness Vegas trip go? Did you see Carlota? I was out there 2 years ago and she offered to hood me up with some Vegas inside clubs but just wound up getting sucked up in the Vegas whirlwind.

Vegas was awesome,the old man made it 14 of 28 days there and did we ever get tore up.Yes,hooked up with Carlota on Satueday and she gave me and my buddy a great hangover cure.

[Otter]

my little niece is all growed up

Make all that hair dark black with a little darker completion and a girl who wouldn't be caught dead in front of a pickup and you have Santina.

I have no where near those high standards btw, just giving you an idea of what this girl is expecting out of life.

Poor guy.

[Otter]

Vegas was awesome,the old man made it 14 of 28 days there and did we ever get tore up.Yes,hooked up with Carlota on Satueday and she gave me and my buddy a great hangover cure.

That's great. I'm going to have to see if she'll give me a second chance. Sounds like she has some serious connections.

I'm grabbing a tissue and going to bed.

[Otter]

ROFL

Sometime the bull gets you, sometimes you get the bull.

She''ll be there in the morning. :D

[Coach]

Well, if you're torn up that bad in the ass, tell your girlfriend/wife to add some extra lube on that damn dildo.

:D :p

[DenverChief]

http://www.lonnieknuckle.com/images/mooseknuckle.jpg