Would/could/should you ever hit a woman back?

[GoHuge]

I was out last night with some friends and it was 8 or 9 couples. We went to dinner, the boats, and then to P&L. One of my buddies has a new girlfriend and she's just kinda weird. Couldn't really put my finger on it, but we where all watching the Pavlik/Martinez fight and she starts going on and on about how boxing is for whimps because she does MMA. This chick was just getting dumber and dumber as the night went on and the more she drank. When we all got down to P&L she starts yelling at my buddy and within 20 seconds just sucker punched him 2-3 times in the face. Everyone just kind of froze like WTF? His mouth/nose where bleeding and she went after him again. They where like 15 yards behind us so none of us where right there to stop it immediatley, but it got broken up quick. He just went into a ball and did nothing. I asked him how he just say there and he said "I can't hit a girl."

I've been slapped by a girl before, but not a big deal. It's what some of the high drama ones do. You hang out with anyone like that and you deserve it. I think fighting is absolutely ridiculous unless it's to protect yourself, your family, or a person that can't protect themselves for whatever reason.

If you where that guy what would you have done? I'd like to think I would just do something to restrain her, or push her down, or whatever. Or I might have went bat shit crazy....not sure. My buddy had told me she's pretty bad ass at the MMA stuff and never lost a match, etc as she was talking down boxing. So she's a trained fighter and makes herself a combatant with closed fists. How is she any different than any of these other athletes like football players, boxers, that assault other people because they really know how to hurt them or are much bigger and stronger? IMO a bully is a bully and should be looked at as such. Having never been in a situation like I'm honestly not sure what I'd do in the heat of the moment. If anybody closes their fists and sucker punches you are they fair game? Do you get your man card pulled for returning fire?

[cookster50]

You do anything back, you're in jail.

[KCUnited]

Gender goes out the window the second I see my own blood.

[Old Dog]

She crosses a line she may as well be a man, cause she's getting hit like one.

[Stewie]

I wouldn't hit, but I'd pin the bitch to the ground and tell her it's over. That's bullshit.

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

You should hang out with LJ then.

[Johnny Vegas]

http://www.sportsgalore.net/wp-content/uploads/Chyna-The-9th-Wonder-of-the-World1.jpg
http://www.ttfatloss.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/a-women-bodybuilder-trainwreck-16.jpg
http://nynerd.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/03/body_builder_chick_6.jpg

[Rain Man]

Women are allowed to do whatever they want according to American law. He should just consider himself lucky that he wasn't arrested for getting hit.

Seriously, if he had a dozen witnesses and she was attacking him, he might - might - get away with punching her back. But probably only if there were other witnesses outside your group who saw the initial unprovoked attack.

[Bugeater]

Well shit, if she's flat out assaulting you, you should have the right to defend yourself, although it's best that you exhaust all other options first.

[threebag]

http://www.sportsgalore.net/wp-content/uploads/Chyna-The-9th-Wonder-of-the-World1.jpg
http://www.ttfatloss.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/a-women-bodybuilder-trainwreck-16.jpg
http://nynerd.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/03/body_builder_chick_6.jpg

GoChiefs--check out this dude.

[GoHuge]

Gender goes out the window the second I see my own blood.I have a feeling I'd be in this camp. Especially with someone you just started dating. When I was younger and much more stupid (and usually drunk on a saturday night) logic never applied until the next morning.

[Al Bundy]

He needs to be done with her.. period.

[Lonewolf Ed]

If she hit me once, I'd probably laugh at her and ask if she hurt her hand. But two or three punches to face and drawing blood? I can't even guess what my reaction would be, if I'd throw hard forearm blocks until she gave up and those do start to hurt so she might not want to try hitting me after a few of those, hit her back, headbutt her, or what. Regardless of what happened next, I'd tell her I think we should see other people! What a psychotic twat.

[Valiant]

knock her the f out.. Her mma experience and witnesses should be enough..

Hopefully he has dumped her ass already, or is she going to violently make him stay in the relationship..

[Mr. Flopnuts]

If he continues dating her he deserves whatever he gets.

That said, while I wouldn't be inclined to hit a woman, I would definitely stop her from assaulting me and if that meant she bled, she would bleed.

[Johnny Vegas]

http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o205/badmajama/MISC/GIF/girlbeerlegsweep.gif
http://bossip.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/snooki-gets-punched-jersey-shore.gif

[salame]

I bet he was just too embarrassed after he got beat down by a chick.

[Johnny Vegas]

if I was up against a woman thats bigger than me and I have nail filer in my neck then yea I'm throwin haymakers.

[GoHuge]

He needs to be done with her.. period.Oh he's done with her. I guess the reason they where walking so much further behind us was because he was telling her that she was making a fool of herself and to STFU. Then the typical response.........lets get louder and even more stupid!

[Mr. Flopnuts]

If I didn't hit her back, I would definitely call the cops and have her arrested and charged. Without a doubt.

[Delano]

I do exactly what he did. Let her throw her weak punches, maybe throw the Lesnar lay on her, and make sure she knows she owes me. First chance I get, I absolutely defile her ass in bed. Then it's over.
Posted via Mobile Device

[-King-]

If she's hitting you so hard that you bleed, then you have no choice other than to knock her the fuck out.

[JD10367]

TTIUWP of the chick.

If she's muscled like a man, kick her ass.

If she's ugly, kick her ass.

If she's hot, don't bruise the face, but subdue her and PIIHB.


Or, he could try not dating psychos. That might work too. :D

[milkman]

I'd throw a few "h's" at her, since you seem to have too many.

"Were" the the fuck did you learn how to spell "where"

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

I would have held my hand to her face until she started throwing up and then run like the wind.

[suds79]

If I didn't hit her back, I would definitely call the cops and have her arrested and charged. Without a doubt.

Yep that's the way to handle it.

But to answer the original question can you ever hit a woman back? Nope.

[salame]

what about throwing an elbow?

[Hammock Parties]

I'd have slashed that bitch's tires. Far more effective and easier to get away without legal consequence.

[Psyko Tek]

I had an ex that hit me a few times

never hit here back
put her ass on the ground once
and walked out

[cdcox]

You hang out with anyone like that and you deserve it.

I basically don't hang out with anyone who views violence as a way to to resolve issues in their every day life, male or female. It just isn't an issue that would ever come up.

[threebag]

Would/Could/Should hit a woman -from the- back.

[Predarat]

If I didn't hit her back, I would definitely call the cops and have her arrested and charged. Without a doubt.

I totally agree with that, it is the best thing to do. Those around that guy should have too.

To answer the question I could only hit back if my life were in danger or a gal was assulting my kid or something like that. Even if she drew blood I doubt I could hit her back.

[Chiefspants]

http://flisted.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/violent-confrontation-between-the-shamwow-guy-and-a-south-beach-prostitute-sasha-harris-vince-shlomi-mugshots-smoking-gun-bizarre-stories-flistedcom-f-listed-pop-culture-flickr-celebrit.png?w=420&h=529

[CrazyHorse]

There would have been one warning.

If she did it again, I would drop her where she stood.

[Pushead2]

find the nearest inanimate objects and proceed to beat or violate. :hump:

[Aries Walker]

No, never hit a woman back, no matter how ugly/butch/violent/Godzilla-esque she is.
But yes, drop this harpy like a bad habit, which I see he did, which is good.

[GoHuge]

No, never hit a woman back, no matter how ugly/butch/violent/Godzilla-esque she is.
But yes, drop this harpy like a bad habit, which I see he did, which is good.This was only the third date they had been on. I don't think it was a real tough decision for him. Talked to him just a little bit ago and he did say she was a wild as all hell (no shit), but obviously has some serious mental trauma. Better to find out now rather than later. No piece of ass is worth that BS. He's actually one of those multiple draft pick guys anyway........Likes a nice variety.

[Buck]

A gf hit me in the face once. I told her to stop and that she was crazy. Then she hit me in the face again and again so I grabbed her right foot and pulled it up as high as I could so she fell on her back. She didn't do anything after that.

[Coach]

Old rule that my momma gave me.

Never throw the first punch. If anybody throws one at you, then give it to him/her.

[Bwana]

http://static.funnyjunk.com/gifs/chuck0.gif

[BigMeatballDave]

My sons mom slapped me a couple times. I just shoved her down. I really wanted to hit her though. If you hit someone in the face, you better be prepared to accept the same.

[Tribal Warfare]

A dude/chick should be know this could be a possibility that this could happen concerning what type of personality the other person has.Once it is identified that they display characteristics of violence he or she should end the relationship. It should stop before it even happens.

[pr_capone]

Gender goes out the window the second I see my own blood.

http://i632.photobucket.com/albums/uu41/gudo22/whitegoodman.jpg

Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. NOBODY.

[GoHuge]

http://i632.photobucket.com/albums/uu41/gudo22/whitegoodman.jpg

Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. NOBODY.ROFL

That was predictable, but still funny!

[kysirsoze]

Last resort, but yeah I'd hit a woman. It would have to be a situation where I absolutely could not restrain her in any other way. Never been in that situation before, but I'd what I have to.

[Tribal Warfare]

Last resort, but yeah I'd hit a woman. It would have to be a situation where I absolutely could not restrain her in any other way. Never been in that situation before, but I'd what I have to.

Now honestly, I'd never hit a woman I'd block the shit out of them which would have their arm bruised for about a month.

[kysirsoze]

Now honestly, I'd never hit a woman I'd block the shit out of them which would have their arm bruised for about a month.

I don't have confidence that, given my lack of training, I would be able to block with such brutal force as to be a proper deterrent. Better just give her a light throat punch.

[bevischief]

I was out last night with some friends and it was 8 or 9 couples. We went to dinner, the boats, and then to P&L. One of my buddies has a new girlfriend and she's just kinda weird. Couldn't really put my finger on it, but we where all watching the Pavlik/Martinez fight and she starts going on and on about how boxing is for whimps because she does MMA. This chick was just getting dumber and dumber as the night went on and the more she drank. When we all got down to P&L she starts yelling at my buddy and within 20 seconds just sucker punched him 2-3 times in the face. Everyone just kind of froze like WTF? His mouth/nose where bleeding and she went after him again. They where like 15 yards behind us so none of us where right there to stop it immediatley, but it got broken up quick. He just went into a ball and did nothing. I asked him how he just say there and he said "I can't hit a girl."

I've been slapped by a girl before, but not a big deal. It's what some of the high drama ones do. You hang out with anyone like that and you deserve it. I think fighting is absolutely ridiculous unless it's to protect yourself, your family, or a person that can't protect themselves for whatever reason.

If you where that guy what would you have done? I'd like to think I would just do something to restrain her, or push her down, or whatever. Or I might have went bat shit crazy....not sure. My buddy had told me she's pretty bad ass at the MMA stuff and never lost a match, etc as she was talking down boxing. So she's a trained fighter and makes herself a combatant with closed fists. How is she any different than any of these other athletes like football players, boxers, that assault other people because they really know how to hurt them or are much bigger and stronger? IMO a bully is a bully and should be looked at as such. Having never been in a situation like I'm honestly not sure what I'd do in the heat of the moment. If anybody closes their fists and sucker punches you are they fair game? Do you get your man card pulled for returning fire?

Press charges... MMA stuff and never lost a match no chance...

[KCChiefsMan]

so did the guy break up with her? I bet he apologized for it.

[KCrockaholic]

That's a crap situation. But he should have atleast restrained her, held her hands down and given her a bear hug for the record books until she quit being a bitch. Nothing wrong with squeezing her arms to her body so she will quit beating the hell out of you.

[rad]

You can't hit a woman, ever. But you can push them really hard with your foot.

[luv]

If she's a trained fighter, then she knows that, outside competitions, she should only use her skills for self-defense. I'm sorry, but if a woman punches you hard enough to draw blood, then I'd say you're justified in doing whatever it takes to stop her, including hitting her back.

He's not still seeing her, is he?

[mlyonsd]

If she's pointing a gun at you or has your tallywacker in one hand and a knife in the other are the only two situations I can think of where it would be justified.

[morphius]

I've been in a situation where I got sucker racked by a girl, grabbed her and held her up against a wall till I could calm myself (and took some effort not to slam her up against the wall). Sort of protected both of us I suppose, but it took a lot of will power to hold my fist back. I've never been a violent person, so the whole thing surprises me still.

Since then I have taken some punches and slaps from girls without the slightest urge to hit back, so I guess you just don't know what you are going to do until it happens.

[GoHuge]

The more I've thought about the situation and how stupid she was the more I think he should have just pummeled her ass. Do away with her self proclaimed "never losing a match" shit once and for all. When someone becomes a combatant your allowed to meet force with force. With most of the opinions expressed here it's pretty apparent the overall consensus is your gender doesn't protect you from the consequences of your actions. That's good because what I really wanted to say or tell him to do was knock that crazy bitch out. Glad some people are of like mind.

[Iowanian]

He should have death punched her and sprayed a can of pepper spray into her cooter.

[pr_capone]

If a woman hits me as hard as she can without me having put hands on her first, which would never happen, she damn well better expect me to do the same.

I might let the first one go with a warning or a shove, but do it twice and I will not discriminate based on gender.

[Pablo]

I had a stupid bitch of an ex-girlfriend.

She went off on me once, punched me probably 4 times in the face while I tried to move away from the situation and chill out. She wasn't gonna quit, so I grabbed her by the throat until she understood I wasn't going to let her hit me and if she tried she wasn't gonna be able to breathe.

Ain't nothing wrong with choking a crazy bitch out.

[Iowanian]

Feminism and equal rights mandate that she take an uppercut to the cooterbone.

Your friend didn't do anything because he's an obvious and blatant SEXIST.

You should really stop hanging out with such Neanderthal Bastards!

[Ebolapox]

no 'I'd hit it' responses? you guys are slipping.

[Ebolapox]

antifreeze?

[RedThat]

I don't have answers to your questions, but I think it's pretty clear this chick is messed up psychologically and your buddy should end it with her immediately.

I say if he could get out of trouble, do it. Not worth the time and effort to deal with people like that.

She sounds like a violent drunk, and the MMA has got to her head.

[Blick]

My girlfriend said hit the bitch.

[GoHuge]

Again he's already done with her. Out, moving on, next. For him three dates is a long relationship. Diagnosed the crazy and he's done. He's just come from the background of you never hit a girl no matter what. A crazy bitch is no sacred cow. They can be put out to pasture as well. She's a lucky girl to because he's the kind of guy that you might enlist to "handle shit" if something got out of control and you needed some help. No matter what you might think of someone, you never really know who or what someone is or is not capable of. Looked sweet, innocent, and hot as hell, but those qualities don't remove the possibility of crazy or dumb as fuck.

[DaneMcCloud]

JFC.

If some chick had ever punched me when I was single, I'd have walked away immediately.

That woman is insane and not right.

Move on quickly because that is just not worth anyone's time and not even worth a response.

What a fucking psycho.

[blaise]

You can't hit her, although I might have thrown a nice body check into the girl and knocked her down.

[soopamanluva]

When a woman decides to put herself in the position of a man(have a weapon, threaten harm to family etc) she's fair game.

[jidar]

http://www.crackedhumor.com/image.axd?picture=Pimp_Hand.ashx.jpg

[CoMoChief]

Gender goes out the window the second I see my own blood.

Yup. I wouldn't hit her at first. But I'd damn sure let her I know I'm about to snap. If she seems not to care, well then she's going to care.

[CoMoChief]

I was out last night with some friends and it was 8 or 9 couples. We went to dinner, the boats, and then to P&L. One of my buddies has a new girlfriend and she's just kinda weird. Couldn't really put my finger on it, but we where all watching the Pavlik/Martinez fight and she starts going on and on about how boxing is for whimps because she does MMA. This chick was just getting dumber and dumber as the night went on and the more she drank. When we all got down to P&L she starts yelling at my buddy and within 20 seconds just sucker punched him 2-3 times in the face. Everyone just kind of froze like WTF? His mouth/nose where bleeding and she went after him again. They where like 15 yards behind us so none of us where right there to stop it immediatley, but it got broken up quick. He just went into a ball and did nothing. I asked him how he just say there and he said "I can't hit a girl."

I've been slapped by a girl before, but not a big deal. It's what some of the high drama ones do. You hang out with anyone like that and you deserve it. I think fighting is absolutely ridiculous unless it's to protect yourself, your family, or a person that can't protect themselves for whatever reason.

If you where that guy what would you have done? I'd like to think I would just do something to restrain her, or push her down, or whatever. Or I might have went bat shit crazy....not sure. My buddy had told me she's pretty bad ass at the MMA stuff and never lost a match, etc as she was talking down boxing. So she's a trained fighter and makes herself a combatant with closed fists. How is she any different than any of these other athletes like football players, boxers, that assault other people because they really know how to hurt them or are much bigger and stronger? IMO a bully is a bully and should be looked at as such. Having never been in a situation like I'm honestly not sure what I'd do in the heat of the moment. If anybody closes their fists and sucker punches you are they fair game? Do you get your man card pulled for returning fire?

If she did that shit and she's a trained fighter you knock her ass out.

Tell her you're not going to take that shit. Sometimes you have to remind the Hen, who the Rooster is.

[Garcia Bronco]

MMA people are generally poorly educated losers, much like boxers. If you participate in MMA and feel offended by the sentence above, then it probably applies to you.

[notorious]

MMA people are generally poorly educated losers, much like boxers. If you participate in MMA and feel offended by the sentence above, then it probably applies to you.

Garcia, I agree. I have yet to run into a smart, educated person that gets into fights.


Usually people with little or nothing to lose get into fights.

I have walked away from losers trying to start something. I got called every name in the book, but guess what? I still have my great life and self-respect while they wake up every morning knowing that they are loser douchebags.

[Lumpy]

IMO hitting or pushing away a female in order to defend yourself is acceptable. As long as you don't go apeshit and she ends up in the hospital.

Either way, that chick sounds like a psycho and should have been given a lovetap. Of course, w/ her being 'skilled' in fighting, your buddy probably did the right thing, thus avoiding a total ass-whooping by a chick. LMAO

Poor guy.

[Frazod]

I've never been punched in the face by a woman. I can't imagine I'd react to it very well.

I've always heard that the conventional wisdom is "if you want to fight like a man, so be it." Personally, I figure I'd give her the first one. Probably not the second. Hope I never have to find out.

[MOhillbilly]

sometimes you gotta let a woman know she aint a man.

That shit might of worked with some other cats but you push me, ill push you down.

[MOhillbilly]

Yup. I wouldn't hit her at first. But I'd damn sure let her I know I'm about to snap. If she seems not to care, well then she's going to care.

id slap em 1st. just to let em know WTF is about to go down.

just remember women play for keeps. If you smack one you best be willin to see it to the bitter end.
No surrender.

[Garcia Bronco]

Garcia, I agree. I have yet to run into a smart, educated person that gets into fights.


Usually people with little or nothing to lose get into fights.

I have walked away from losers trying to start something. I got called every name in the book, but guess what? I still have my great life and self-respect while they wake up every morning knowing that they are loser douchebags.

Exactly, because everybody loses. There is no winning.

[Bane]

All I can say is I never have.I've wanted to in the past but always found the strength to walk away.My ex pulled some crazy shit and really pushed my limits but I never hit her.
Posted via Mobile Device

[L.A. Chieffan]

was she hot?

[MOhillbilly]

Exactly, because everybody loses. There is no winning.

If you finish it your pride wins.

Means something.

[The Franchise]

If she hits me with a closed fist....she gets one. If she comes back for a 2nd.....she's getting knocked the fuck out.

[Otter]

She deserved a punch in the throat if you ask me. Once you start throwing punches to the face that bloody me up you lose your lady privileges.

I can speak from the experience that usually the better you get at defending yourself the less likely you are to engage someone. It's no longer two frat boys throwing haymakers hoping one lands. You can really **** someone up if you know what your doing. Not saying I'm Bwana caliber but I'm working on it.

Did he do anything to antagonize her? Kinda weird that she would just start swinging out of the blue unless she's a total psycho.

[beach tribe]

The answer is no. Unless you are a pussy, and she's kicking your ass like a bitch.

You just push her away. I've been through this, and it's not that hard to keep her at a distance.

Your arms should be longer than hers. You can put your hand on her forehead, and keep her out of reach. that's what I did.

[Otter]

The answer is no. Unless you are a pussy, and she's kicking your ass like a bitch.

If you want to be treated like a lady, act like a lady.

[MOhillbilly]

If you want to be treated like a lady, act like a lady.

Agreed, ill open a door, say yes maam, help anyone out who needs it, if they ask or not.

But if you wanna go nuts, lets get bonkers.

[Christofire]

http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o205/badmajama/MISC/GIF/girlbeerlegsweep.gif
http://bossip.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/snooki-gets-punched-jersey-shore.gif

Wow ... that's the first time I'd actually seen the clip of Snooki getting punched. What a dick.

[jenksme]

No, never.

[SAUTO]

Agreed, ill open a door, say yes maam, help anyone out who needs it, if they ask or not.

But if you wanna go nuts, lets get bonkers.

this

[Inspector]

He needs to be done with her.. period.

She probably doesn't have those anymore.

[Micjones]

I think I'd restrain her and call it a day.

But my philosophy is this... If you hit a man you should prepare yourself to be hit like one.
You can't open the door to violence then hide behind your tits.

I doubt very seriously I'd ever hit a woman though.

[Bwana]

She deserved a punch in the throat if you ask me. Once you start throwing punches to the face that bloody me up you lose your lady privileges.

I can speak from the experience that usually the better you get at defending yourself the less likely you are to engage someone. It's no longer two frat boys throwing haymakers hoping one lands. You can really **** someone up if you know what your doing. Not saying I'm Bwana caliber but I'm working on it.

Did he do anything to antagonize her? Kinda weird that she would just start swinging out of the blue unless she's a total psycho.

Heh, I know I have told this story before, but the short version is I had a chick try to kill me one night with a piece of picture frame glass after the crazy bitch threw the picture up against the wall when she was on the whisky. She ran at me yelling "I'm going to kill you!" I don't have to tell you Joe, you don't think, you react. I threw a front kick, it hit her, she hit the wall, wind gone, problem solved. I was living with her at the time, I called her mother and told her she had 30 minutes to come get her DNA, or it and all her belongings we going out on the front lawn. That was the last time I saw her. Would I normally hit a female, no, when they try to kill me and my life is on the line, you're damn right.

[Gonzo]

http://www.stuckinthe80s.com/image.php?productid=16333

"I apologize for way back when I hit you the first time."

[Otter]

Heh, I know I have told this story before, but the short version is I had a chick try to kill me one night with a piece of picture frame glass after the crazy bitch threw the picture up against the wall when she was on the whisky. She ran at me yelling "I'm going to kill you!" I don't have to tell you Joe, you don't think, you react. I threw a front kick, it hit her, she hit the wall, wind gone, problem solved. I was living with her at the time, I called her mother and told her she had 30 minutes to come get her DNA, or it and all her belongings we going out on the front lawn. That was the last time I saw her. Would I normally hit a female, no, when they try to kill me and my life is on the line, you're damn right.

I've heard that one before but it never gets old. :D

Yeah man, I'm not condoning hitting women by a long shot. But hell, this chick didn't slap him or throw a drink in his face. She was an MMA trained drunk, violent nutjob hitting him hard enough to bloody him up in front of his friends and other strangers.

A line was crossed there which as far as I'm concerned is rational for (thanks MoHillbilly) "wanna go nuts? Ok, let's go fucking bonkers!".

Ugly subject but that's my take.

[raybec 4]

Either way you slice it there's no positive outcome if your the guy. You either beat up a woman or get beat up by one. So fuck it, beat that bitches ass. (unless you deserve to be punched and if you deserved it you know it 99% of the time.)

['Hamas' Jenkins]

I've found that throwing a drink in their face is a great way to escalate the situation.

[Bill Lundberg]

Let me start off by stating that my curiosity of the opposite sex began at a very early age. The whole, girls are gross thing never really applied to me. As early as the 2nd grade myself and a couple of buddies would take over the tire forts at recess and two of us would “guard” the fort while the third was inside playing “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours”, which usually meant punching around in the girls panties. I don’t know what’s scarier, the fact that we did this as 8 year olds or the fact that we always found willing girls. As I assume most kids do, I always had a “girlfriend”.

In the 4th grade that girlfriend was Misty. Misty was the cute, popular girl with blond hair and blue eyes. Apparently 4th grade was a good year for me because all the girls would send me the “Will you go out with me? Yes/No Circle One” notes. One glorious day I received one of those notes from Jenny. Jenny was a fiery little red headed tom boy. She refused to play little league softball with the girls because she wanted to play baseball with the boys. Looking back on this I’m surprised she didn’t grow up to be a lesbian, but I digress. Apparently Jenny didn’t know I was “going out” with Misty so I checked yes and fired the note back to her. I now officially had two girlfriends and was on top of the world. This lasted all of roughly 2 hours.

Afternoon recess rolls around and Jenny and Misty confront me. I guess it didn’t take long for word to get out that I had two girlfriends. They demanded that I chose one on the spot. Naturally, I chose Misty (I’ve always been a sucker for Blonds). Before I finished speaking Misty’s name Jenny punched me twice in the face, it was a mean 1-2 combination. A crowd gathered all my buddies are urging me to kick her ass; it was your typical playground fight scene. One problem, my dad always told me if I ever hit a girl I might as well not bother coming home due to the amount of damage he would do to me with “the belt” once I got home. Knowing this I just stood there and took it, then it happened, Jenny wound up her right leg and, with the force of an Ryan Succop field goal attempt, drilled me right in the nuts. I dropped to my knees in tears and the teacher came to break up the crowd. I was devastated physically and emotionally. I just got my ass kicked by a girl.

School resumed and I told the teacher I was sick and needed to see the nurse. I convinced her to let me call my mother (a teacher at the same school) and let me go home for the day. Upon arriving home my mom tells dad the story and without hesitation he says, “If anyone boy or girl ever does that to you, you have every right to defend yourself. You can’t let them get away with that.” Would have been great information the day before…

Now, 25 years later I probably still wouldn't hit a girl even if she kicked me in the beans. But I sure as hell would keep it from getting to that point to begin with.

[Frazod]

I've found that throwing a drink in their face is a great way to escalate the situation.

So is asking them how many pounds of makeup they're wearing.