Subway Finally Agrees to Tessellate Cheese

[jAZ]

http://gawker.com/5551263/subway-finally-agrees-to-tessellate-cheese

Subway Finally Agrees to Tessellate Cheese
You will measure your life before and after this moment. After years of merely overlapping triangular pieces of cheese on their sandwiches, cruelly loading one side with more than the other, Subway will now tessellate the slices, according to Consumerist.

It is, quite simply, the end of the tyranny of slightly more cheese on one side of a baguette than the other. There are few unmitigatedly good things in the world — ungainly compromises usually abound. But this? This is bipartisan, transcends religious differences, does not discriminate by race, or color or creed.

The world changes on July 1st. We are not sure why it takes this long to implement. But perfection cannot be rushed.

http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/7/2010/05/500x_screen_shot_2010-05-30_at_12.32.36.jpg

[boogblaster]

now if they'd take some of the vegies off and add some meat their subs might be eatible ....

[Sure-Oz]

Who eats that crap anyway? goodcents please

[DaKCMan AP]

now if they'd take some of the vegies off and add some meat their subs might be eatible ....

If Americans would learn that 'eatible' is not a word, this country would be more Awesome.

[Simply Red]

this is great news! When are they going to get 'flavor?'

[Frazod]

I would have thought "Tessellate" meant setting up a meeting for your trusting boss, at which he will be assassinated.

[LaChapelle]

The Dollar Store refuses to carry the poor quality ingredients
that Subway uses in their product

[Bane]

this is great news! When are they going to get 'flavor?'

ROFL

[gblowfish]

Somebody actually got paid to update the cheese procedure at corporate hq.
Just think, if you were an English Major, or a frustrated fiction writer, and you were in your little cube farm, and you had to write detailed cheese placement instructions, you might as well just kill yourself. Your life has served no meaningful purpose.

[Rain Man]

We shouldn't be applauding more standardization. Part of the fun of eating a sandwich is the suspense of what's going to be in that bite. Lots of mustard? Maybe a whole tomato slice? Will it just be veggies because the meat slid backwards in the bun? Standardizing the cheese in every bite merely domesticates us a little more. I'm glad Dennis Hopper isn't here to see this.

[Bane]

We shouldn't be applauding more standardization. Part of the fun of eating a sandwich is the suspense of what's going to be in that bite. Lots of mustard? Maybe a whole tomato slice? Will it just be veggies because the meat slid backwards in the bun? Standardizing the cheese in every bite merely domesticates us a little more. I'm glad Dennis Hopper isn't here to see this.

Agreed.

[T-post Tom]

jimp

[JD10367]

Next time the girl at Subway asks if you'd like swiss, provolone, or american, respond by asking her in turn if she'd like some fromunda. They love when you're friendly like that.

[Gonzo]

I like subway. Their cold cut on italian herb is pretty damn good.
Posted via Mobile Device

[DaFace]

this is great news! When are they going to get 'flavor?'

Heh. I tend to agree.

[Bugeater]

I like subway. Their cold cut on italian herb is pretty damn good.
Posted via Mobile Device
Spicy italian here. I've never understood the Subway hate.

[KcMizzou]

Spicy italian here. I've never understood the Subway hate.I'm a Spicy Italian guy, myself. I like Goodcents more, but Subway's cheaper and more convenient. Either way, for "fast food"... it's a nice change.

[Chiefs Rool]

whenever I'm in the mood for a lettuce sammich on some shitty bread, I go to Subway!

[listopencil]

Spicy italian here. I've never understood the Subway hate.


Spicy Italian on nine grain honey oat, toasted. Pepper jack cheese and Chipotle sauce. All the veggies. Salt, pepper, oil, vinegar.

[Sure-Oz]

I'm a Spicy Italian guy, myself. I like Goodcents more, but Subway's cheaper and more convenient. Either way, for "fast food"... it's a nice change.

I went to subway for the last time in Lenexa...about 2 months ago

My sandwich was just gross to the point where the bread seemed old and crumbly too. So i pretty much go out of my way to get goodcents even if its a bit farther. They have never had that problem with me, and Subway almost seems more like eating a fast food sandwich.

I am still on my anti-fast food 'life' now and haven't cracked yet, i'm quite proud that i haven't touched anything fast food wise except a sandwich shop since January.

[Sure-Oz]

Spicy italian here. I've never understood the Subway hate.

It just sucks balls in terms of quality, and im not real picky. It seems that most of the time ive had crappy sandwiches. I prefer goodcents, jimmy johns, or planet sub now.

[DaFace]

It just sucks balls in terms of quality, and im not real picky. It seems that most of the time ive had crappy sandwiches. I prefer goodcents, jimmy johns, or planet sub now.

Yep. I'm generally a "hot sandwich" kind of guy, and their hot sandwiches are just awful.

[Bugeater]

It just sucks balls in terms of quality, and im not real picky. It seems that most of the time ive had crappy sandwiches. I prefer goodcents, jimmy johns, or planet sub now.
Eh, it's hit and miss like any other chain. I got sick from a JJ sandwich a while back so no place is perfect. I'm sure I've eaten a crappy Subway sandwich a few times here or there but they seem pretty consistent for the most part. Plus it's always easy to find a Subway, I eat there a lot when I travel.

[LetsSignRussell]

Yep. I'm generally a "hot sandwich" kind of guy, and their hot sandwiches are just awful.

they have subway in emporia?

[Bugeater]

they have subway in emporia?
Dude, there's a fucking Subway at every wide spot in the road across America. Plus he lives in Denver now.

[LetsSignRussell]

I just wanted to see if he still lived in Emporia.

my town of 1,900 people has a subway

[JD10367]

I don't mind Subway, but I also literally stick to two subs.

When very hungry... Tuna on footlong herb-n-cheese, with lettuce, tomato, pickles, and onions.

When not that hungry... Wrap with extra provolone, with southwest chipotle sauce, spinach, tomato, onion, and olive.

So it's hard for them to fuck it up on me, really.

[baitism]

I don't like to eat Subway because I smell like Subway until I shower and change clothes and that gets annoying.

[DaFace]

they have subway in emporia?

You are a complete idiot.

[LetsSignRussell]

You are a complete idiot.

:spock: explain.

[Gonzo]

whenever I'm in the mood for a lettuce sammich on some shitty bread, I go to Subway!
You do know that they make the sandwich in front of you and you can request a decreased amount of lettuce, right?
Posted via Mobile Device

[Pants]

whenever I'm in the mood for a lettuce sammich on some shitty bread, I go to Subway!

You do realize that everything is optional on a sandwich. You can just chose to not add any lettuce to it or you can even ask for "a little lettuce". It's pretty cool.

Having said that, Quizno's hot subs are much better.

EDIT: DAMN YOU GOZNO! DAMN YOU! :)

[Ebolapox]

testicle cheese?

[Chiefs Rool]

You do realize that everything is optional on a sandwich. You can just chose to not add any lettuce to it or you can even ask for "a little lettuce". It's pretty cool.

Having said that, Quizno's hot subs are much better.

EDIT: DAMN YOU GOZNO! DAMN YOU! :)

well, I guess I didn't make it very clear. What I meant was that if I wanted a roast beef sandwich with half a gram of roast beef on it with a bunch of other stuff on crappy bread, I'll go to subway. I always like lettuce on my sandwiches and at subway, that's all you can taste because there just ain't much meat on it.

[Quesadilla Joe]

this is great news! When are they going to get 'flavor?'

Oil and vinegar makes every sub taste better.

[Bugeater]

Oil and vinegar makes every sub taste better.
Yep. Oil, vinegar, salt and pepper are mandatory on my subs.

[LetsSignRussell]

my sandwhich: ww bread, ham, cheese, bacon, mayonaise.

[Bugeater]

Mayonnaise is the most fucking disgusting substance known to man.

[LetsSignRussell]

raise your hand if you like mayonaise.

[Crush]

raise your hand if you like mayonaise.


Not really. Hidden Valley Ranch is the superior condiment.

[Crush]

Mayonnaise is the most fucking disgusting substance known to man.


I dare you to find something worse than mayonnaise's retarded cousin, Miracle Whip.

[Sully]

Now if they'll stop acting like black olives and pickles are made of pure gold, and I don't have to goad them into putting more than three of each on a footlong sub, we may be onto something.

[Sully]

It would also be nice if they didn't feel they need to put their entire body weight onto the bread as they cut it.

[Bugeater]

I dare you to find something worse than mayonnaise's retarded cousin, Miracle Whip.
I'd rather use Miracle Whip than real mayo. It's only slightly less disgusting though, but I have to use one of the two when I make turkey salad sandwiches.

[Rain Man]

I don't understand why sandwich shops exist. Apparently lots of people like to buy something that they can make in 10 seconds at home for 1/10th the cost. Sandwiches are the default food for when you don't want to make other food. If I go to a restaurant or fast food place, I'm going to order something that I won't generally make at home, like french fries and milk shakes and chicken nuggets.

[LetsSignRussell]

I don't understand why sandwich shops exist. Apparently lots of people like to buy something that they can make in 10 seconds at home for 1/10th the cost. Sandwiches are the default food for when you don't want to make other food. If I go to a restaurant or fast food place, I'm going to order something that I won't generally make at home, like french fries and milk shakes and chicken nuggets.

:clap:

[Rain Man]

I dare you to find something worse than mayonnaise's retarded cousin, Miracle Whip.


Please meet the kindly Mr. Mus-Tard.

[LetsSignRussell]

Please meet the kindly Mr. Mus-Tard.

:clap:

[R8RFAN]

Subway is ok, they cheap on the meat is expected but now it is as if they are counting the lettuce shreds ....

It will do in a rush but for a Great sub go here
http://www.jerseymikes.com/

[|Zach|]

Subway is ok. Not great but not horrible. There is one really close to me, within a block. I went twice and never again. Each time the people working there were complete assholes. I am really forgiving with service types from spending so many years in a similar job but these folks were such apathetic dick heads I couldn't believe it.

If I am grabbing a sandwich in town I usually stop into D'Bronx around 39th St. Best in town. I am also a big fan of planet sub, I think they do fast hot sandwiches really really well. When I am working I usually stop into Sylvia's. It is nice because it is only a block away from the studio and local. Folks in there are great.

D'Bronx is good though. Get the J-Bomb...

J. BOMB - ROAST BEEF, TURKEY, SALAMI, HERB CREAM CHEESE, PROVOLONE, LETTUCE, TOMATO, MAYO, VINAIGRETTE

[RealSNR]

Subway is ok. Not great but not horrible. There is one really close to me, within a block. I went twice and never again. Each time the people working there were complete assholes. I am really forgiving with service types from spending so many years in a similar job but these folks were such apathetic dick heads I couldn't believe it.

If I am grabbing a sandwich in town I usually stop into D'Bronx around 39th St. Best in town. I am also a big fan of planet sub, I think they do fast hot sandwiches really really well. When I am working I usually stop into Sylvia's. It is nice because it is only a block away from the studio and local. Folks in there are great.

D'Bronx is good though. Get the J-Bomb...

J. BOMB - ROAST BEEF, TURKEY, SALAMI, HERB CREAM CHEESE, PROVOLONE, LETTUCE, TOMATO, MAYO, VINAIGRETTEThis brings up an interesting point.

I think I like that sandwich simply because I like or can tolerate most things on that sandwich. If the ingredients suit you, odds are you'll like the sandwich.

However, if somebody told me to order one or they'd kill my family, I'd ask for that sandwich without mayo and tomato (because those two food items are the spawn of satan).

Subway is completely customizable as other people have already stated in this thread. Is that something to do with their popularity? I mean, people who want a BLT can get a BLT, and those who want roast beef will get roast beef, but rarely do people have a craving for a roast beef with 9 different other fixings on the sandwich. But they option of adding/subtracting items to their sandwich makes it a much better sandwich.

Subway's quality IS significantly less than most other fast sandwich shops, however. They might be wise to build some higher quality shops. Call it Subway Plus. They could have much better bread choices, and when they toast the subs the bread wouldn't get all charred and nasty.

[Gonzo]

I dare you to find something worse than mayonnaise's retarded cousin, Miracle Whip.
Miracle Whip is ok, better than mayo imo.
I'm actually interested and may try that new mayo with the olive oil in it.
Posted via Mobile Device

[BigMeatballDave]

Who eats that crap anyway? goodcents pleaseMan, I miss Mr. Goodcents. I haven't had them in about 13 yrs.

[DaKCMan AP]

Subway's quality must suck in the Midwest. They're fine for a quick sub here in FL. Many people prefer Publix subs, which I agree are better if you're getting cold cuts. However, my Subway order is Awesome and never fails:

Tuna footlong, honey oat bread
provolone cheese
lettuce
tomatoes
cucumbers
onions
pickles
black olives
green bell peppers
banana peppers
jalapeno peppers (optional)
No sauces, salt, pepper, oil, vinegar or anything else.

[mlyonsd]

Well this is good news. I've been boycotting Subway since about 1998 when my turkey sub rolled off the car seat and I realized it was probably because of inbalanced cheese, not me slamming on the brakes.

[Dayze]

Up until last year I had not eaten Subway in probably 15 years; our little town in MO got a Subway built (only thing in town was a Sonic up to that point)...figured "what the hell", since it was about 1/8th mile from my house.

Picked up two sammiches for my wife and I; finished said sammich and though "yep...still sucks".


I'll give it a try in another 14 years.

[Hootie]

when I was 16 and worked at Subway I did the new procedure back then...I just thought it looked nicer and made more sense, lol...

I'm a pioneer I guess.

[Hootie]

My sub of choice is:

12" Italian B.M.T. on Italian Herbs and Cheese bread with: lettuce, pickles, extra jalapenos, a few banana peppers, onions, spicy mustard, oil, and salt and pepper...

Good fucking sub.

[HemiEd]

I don't mind Subway, but I also literally stick to two subs.

When very hungry... Tuna on footlong herb-n-cheese, with lettuce, tomato, pickles, and onions.

When not that hungry... Wrap with extra provolone, with southwest chipotle sauce, spinach, tomato, onion, and olive.

So it's hard for them to **** it up on me, really.
It is hard for me to understand anyone living in the Boston area, eating at Subway. They had home grown sub shops that were fantastic when I lived up there in R.I.
Subway is edible, but not compared to those New England sub shops.

[sedated]

why the f**k did it take them so long to make this their "standard procedure"? The cheese is obviously cut for this purpose. I don't get cheese on my subs, but always wondered why the dumbasses behind the counter couldn't figure out how to apply it correctly.

[Kerberos]

After eating at a Port-of-Subs out here in Vegas/Henderson I won't go back to either subway or goodcents again.

[Frazod]

Just found out that the closed the nearest Quiznos. Bastards! :cuss:

[gblowfish]

Sub Shop in Columbia, MO and Planet Sub here in KC are very similar. Good stuff. Nothing better than a toasted Veggie Sub and some French Onion Soup from Sub Shop in Columbia. Yummy.

[BryanBusby]

Man, I miss Mr. Goodcents. I haven't had them in about 13 yrs.

I wouldn't miss them too much. At least the one near by my house has gone down the shitter in the last few years. Portions were lower and the price went way up.

I just go to Jimmy Johns now.

[sedated]

I just go to Jimmy Johns now.

I'm not for bashing people's personal tastes (I'm one of the few who enjoys Subway on occasion), but I do not understand the love for jimmy johns. There are no unique ingredients, and about 5 things on the menu.

Most places have some unique sauces, or meats that might take more preparation than just slicing from a deli block. Jimmy Johns has mayo/mustard, turkey/roast beef, and lettuce/tomato. That’s it.

[mlyonsd]

This might have been asked already but is there any reason they just don't have their supplier cut the cheese (no pun intended) in 6 inch rectangle slices?

[Fish]

I'm not for bashing people's personal tastes (I'm one of the few who enjoys Subway on occasion), but I do not understand the love for jimmy johns. There are no unique ingredients, and about 5 things on the menu.

Most places have some unique sauces, or meats that might take more preparation than just slicing from a deli block. Jimmy Johns has mayo/mustard, turkey/roast beef, and lettuce/tomato. That’s it.

I totally agree. The JJ love is baffling to me. It's the most plain, unexciting sandwich you could ask for. Even the chips are boring.

[DeezNutz]

I totally agree. The JJ love is baffling to me. It's the most plain, unexciting sandwich you could ask for. Even the chips are boring.

The bread is pretty decent. Much better than a Subway, for example.

[Hootie]

they take out the middle part of the bread...Subway could probably do the same thing if they wanted...

Jimmy Johns...I'll give them one thing...amazing delivery service...

It's fast, and they work it into the cost...they add $0.25 per item ordered...

so if you just want a quick sandwich...they'll bring it to you for $0.25...and in like 5 minutes...

By the way...

Mr. Jimmy John himself comes into my work all of the time and he's a real asshole.

[Fish]

The bread is pretty decent. Much better than a Subway, for example.

Really? I'd actually prefer one of Subway's custom breads. JJ's is just plain whitey-ass white. It's not bad by any means, but I don't get all wet under the tongue thinking about it....

[mlyonsd]

Really? I'd actually prefer one of Subway's custom breads. JJ's is just plain whitey-ass white. It's not bad by any means, but I don't get all wet under the tongue thinking about it....

Had one of Subway's special breads last week. I think it was Italian herb or something. Not bad.

[DaKCMan AP]

Mr. Jimmy John himself comes into my work all of the time and he's a real asshole.

http://bp1.blogger.com/_pNO1VjlggB0/SCzVxBfTyrI/AAAAAAAAAFU/MbIfYTQHD44/s320/JimmyJohnsPhoto.jpg

[sedated]

Subways breads are much softer than JJ's. JJ has a thick crust IMO, and it makes the ingredients slide out the back as you knaw on it.

[ClevelandBronco]

I would have thought "Tessellate" meant setting up a meeting for your trusting boss, at which he will be assassinated.

Tessio was always smarter.

[DeezNutz]

Really? I'd actually prefer one of Subway's custom breads. JJ's is just plain whitey-ass white. It's not bad by any means, but I don't get all wet under the tongue thinking about it....

Nah, me either, but now I'm going to have to try one of Subway's customs. Been forever since I've gone that route, but I've had their French bread several weeks ago.

[Stewie]

I ate at Jimmy John's once. It was OK but the employee enthusiasm was over the top. I was WTF? I just want lunch!

Give me Jason's Deli or Planet Sub any day of the week.

[BryanBusby]

I'm not for bashing people's personal tastes (I'm one of the few who enjoys Subway on occasion), but I do not understand the love for jimmy johns. There are no unique ingredients, and about 5 things on the menu.

Most places have some unique sauces, or meats that might take more preparation than just slicing from a deli block. Jimmy Johns has mayo/mustard, turkey/roast beef, and lettuce/tomato. That’s it.

Nothing wrong with that if you're looking for a quick lunch. I eat at Subway on occasion, too. I guess I'm just somebody that doesn't take getting a sub sandwich as serious fucking business.

[gblowfish]

http://bp1.blogger.com/_pNO1VjlggB0/SCzVxBfTyrI/AAAAAAAAAFU/MbIfYTQHD44/s320/JimmyJohnsPhoto.jpg

You can tell that guy is a douche.

[Rain Man]

This is probably the most successful tessellated cheese thread we've ever had on chiefsplanet. Congratulations, jAZ.

[Pablo]

Nothing wrong with that if you're looking for a quick lunch. I eat at Subway on occasion, too. I guess I'm just somebody that doesn't take getting a sub sandwich as serious ****ing business.

It's CP. Every food and drink thread is serious fucking business. Let the unwashed masses drink their Bud Light and eat at chain restaurants.

[Hootie]

You can tell that guy is a douche.

I work at a VERY famous pizza joint on campus...

Like...

Everyone loves the place...

It is a bit unique in the way it is ran...but we sell slices of pizza for lunch and if you come at the wrong time, they can be pretty old and luke warm...that's just how it works...that's how it has worked for 30 years...

This dude is based out of Champaign...that's where Jimmy Johns Inc. is...

and he comes in quite often for slices and he is always trying to send them back...and he doesn't get the fact that where I work...and it might be the only place in the world that is like this...the customer is never right...

You don't get free shit for being a bitch at this place...the pizza is so good they can be assholes and get away with it...if you don't like what you get, tough shit...pay your bill (or they'll call the cops) and don't come back...

That's the best part of my job...you don't have to ever lube up for angry customers like a chain restaurant.

[Hootie]

I ate at Jimmy John's once. It was OK but the employee enthusiasm was over the top. I was WTF? I just want lunch!

Give me Jason's Deli or Planet Sub any day of the week.

It's true dude...

Like I said...

I live in the Jimmy Johns capital of the world...they sometimes have dozens of people working/training/opening new stores/etc. etc. etc. at one store at the same time...

One time I was super hungover about 5 years ago and I walked in to a Jimmy Johns...was greeted by about 25 people (I was the only one walking in and no one else was even in the restaurant)...I became very confused...looked around...and walked back out and went across the street to a Subway...

True story...when I'm hungover I don't need 25 gung-ho $10 an hour employees yelling nice things to me to try and stick out to their boss...that's just fucking annoying.

[Hootie]

I also have three high school buddies who work for Jimmy Johns Inc.

Great fucking job for those guys...

I went to the first Jimmy Johns ever in Charleston, IL with my dad when I was 13...

at that time...there were probably 1 or 2 in Champaign where I lived...and maybe 15-20 nation wide...

Damn dude...

Now Jimmy Johns is so big they are advertising during the Super Bowl...

It's all about the quick/cheap delivery...the sandwiches are nothing special (obviously) but you don't have to worry about minimum delivery fees/lengthy waits/ or any of the typical delivery bullshit.

If you want delivered lunch for under $6...Jimmy Johns is about the only place that can do that for you...and when I used to live right on campus there would be times when it arrived in less than 5 minutes...and they take orders until 4 AM...

Very, very well ran business...so you have to give the guy credit...if the dude I worked for spread his pizza around the way Jimmy Johns markets their subs...he'd be a fucking mega millionaire...

People pay $150+ for frozens to be delivered to where they live...for like one pizza...and they come in and buy ready made frozen pizzas for menu price...

I'm sorry, but I could never justify dropping $19 for a frozen pizza that I have to make myself...but they probably sell over 50 per day...

[Sully]

There is a place where Blue Ridge Mall used to be called "Firehouse Subs," or something similar, and it's damn good.

[DaKCMan AP]

There is a place where Blue Ridge Mall used to be called "Firehouse Subs," or something similar, and it's damn good.

Firehouse has the best hot subs of the fast-food national sub chains.

[Baby Lee]

Mayonnaise is the most fucking disgusting substance known to man.

Love mayo, and it's strange considering it's vicinity to two of my most hated foodstuffs, Miracle Whip and Ranch dressing. There's something in their respective flavors that sets off my 'spoiled food' instinct.

[BigMeatballDave]

Love mayo, and it's strange considering it's vicinity to two of my most hated foodstuffs, Miracle Whip and Ranch dressing. There's something in their respective flavors that sets off my 'spoiled food' instinct.Yummy, Ranch

[BigMeatballDave]

Firehouse has the best hot subs of the fast-food national sub chains.Not National. I've never heard of them.

[DaKCMan AP]

Ranch, mayo, miracle whip, thousand island, blue cheese... :Lin:

[BigMeatballDave]

I had Penn Station for the 1st time yesterday. Pretty damn good.

[DaKCMan AP]

Not National. I've never heard of them.

380 locations in 20 states. If you haven't heard of them it's because you're not Awesome.

[Baby Lee]

I had Penn Station for the 1st time yesterday. Pretty damn good.

A greasefest, but very tasty. Love the Italian, a spritz of malt vinegar on the fries.

Kurt Warner endorsed!!!

[BigMeatballDave]

380 locations in 20 states. If you haven't heard of them it's because you're not Awesome.No, its because NE Ohio sucks and there is nothing here.

[BigMeatballDave]

A greasefest, but very tasty. Love the Italian, a spritz of malt vinegar on the fries.

Kurt Warner endorsed!!!I had the Chicken Teryaki. Their fries are awesome.

[DaKCMan AP]

No, its because NE Ohio sucks and there is nothing here.

I'll agree to that.

[LetsSignRussell]

I JUST WENT TO SUBWAY AND THEY DID NOT TESSELATE THEIR CHEESE. I DEMAND A REFUND.

[gblowfish]

BASTAGES!!!
Didn't they get the memo???