A suggestion to improve Halloween.

[Rain Man]

It occurs to me that Halloween is all about childhood calorie ingestion and not about childhood fitness. This is not the right approach.

So on Halloween, please do one of the following:

1. Tape each piece of candy securely to a brick. If everyone does this, children will get significant anaerobic and aerobic activity carrying a bag of bricks around the neighborhood.

2. Tie your candy to a fishing pole. Dangle the candy over the child's head at a level that represents a good vertical leap, plus an inch or two. Make the child work for it.

3. Two children? One piece of candy. Whoever pins the other one gets it.

If we all take measures like this, we can raise a generation of fit and healthy children.

Thank you.

[Bowser]

I was going to say boobs. Boobs make everything better, but I see you were thinking of the children. Well done, and agreed.

[LiveSteam]

BACON

[Brock]

Make them all wear heart rate monitors. Only above 165 gets candy.

I only give out store brand cough drops anyway.

[Rain Man]

I was going to say boobs. Boobs make everything better, but I see you were thinking of the children. Well done, and agreed.

There's no reason this can't be about adult fitness as well. If there's an attractive mother hovering nearby, perhaps you can offer her a piece of candy if she'll do some jumping jacks or leg lifts. This is a family holiday.

[kysirsoze]

What if we all agreed to only give out candy for 1 hour. Kids would be sprinting from door to door to get as much as possible.

Combine this with your brick thing and we could really whip those little fat bastards into shape.

[LiveSteam]

Bacon wrapped Snicker's

[Rain Man]

Make them all wear heart rate monitors. Only above 165 gets candy.

I only give out store brand cough drops anyway.


ROFL

And a health-oriented treat, too. You're really thinking about this stuff.

[Mr. Laz]

We have way too many Holidays tied to food



made us a bunch of fat asses.

[KurtCobain]

I only give out store brand cough drops anyway.

I fucking knew it.

[Hammock Parties]

Just turn the hose on those little bitches.

It's cold out, shivering burns extra calories.

[Rain Man]

What if we all agreed to only give out candy for 1 hour. Kids would be sprinting from door to door to get as much as possible.

Combine this with your brick thing and we could really whip those little fat bastards into shape.


I like the holistic thinking. We turn this from a leisurely food-filled walk down the candy aisle into a marathon sprint. Maybe we can arrange it so that anyone without front steps to their house gives out grapes and water only.

[Mr. Laz]

Make them all wear heart rate monitors. Only above 165 gets candy.

I only give out store brand cough drops anyway.

I figured you would give out Brach's candy


:)

[Kyle DeLexus]

Everyone should just give out chocolate laxatives.

[kysirsoze]

Everyone should just give out chocolate laxatives.

Or include some long sticks to aid in purging.

[Bugeater]

BACON
This. There's not anything that can't be improved with bacon.

[Lonewolf Ed]

We have way too many Holidays tied to food



made us a bunch of fat asses.

I hear you! I really need to tone down my Columbus Day and Flag Day feasts.

[KurtCobain]

Somebody better be giving out Bacon this year, and I don't want any meth cooked into it, please.

[Rain Man]

This. There's not anything that can't be improved with bacon.

You're pretty much right, but I think DaFace gave a thumbs down to the bacon milkshake that some place around here was selling.

[Bowser]

You're pretty much right, but I think DaFace gave a thumbs down to the bacon milkshake that some place around here was selling.

That calls for a two week suspension without pay.

[4th and Long]

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[Renegade]

Antifreeze, what don't kill the young ones will only make them stronger.

[LiveSteam]

Bacon wrapped popcorn balls

[KcMizzou]

Somebody better be giving out Bacon this year, and I don't want any meth cooked into it, please.You'd think so... but once you eat that first strip...

[Rain Man]

Bacon wrapped popcorn balls


I'm giving out either Bacon Ruth bars or Baconfingers.

[Pioli Zombie]

Burn one house down on every street. That would make it more interesting.

[LiveSteam]

Burn one house down on every street. That would make it more interesting.

I like this idea
Smoked bacon wrapped popcorn balls

[Rain Man]

Burn one house down on every street. That would make it more interesting.

I think Detroit has had that tradition for quite a while.

[KcMizzou]

I think Detroit has had that tradition for quite a while.Devil's night! Clearly he hasn't seen "The Crow".

[LiveSteam]

I think Detroit has had that tradition for quite a while.

Sad but true

[BoltWalt]

So on Halloween, please do one of the following:

1. Tape each piece of candy securely to a brick. If everyone does this, children will get significant anaerobic and aerobic activity carrying a bag of bricks around the neighborhood.



Why take the fun out of the holiday? You want to give the kids ammunition and stiff them. Geeze I am glad you were not around when I was trick or treating. I hope several of those bricks end up thrown through several of your windows. Cheap skate.

[-King-]

2. Tie your candy to a fishing pole. Dangle the candy over the child's head at a level that represents a good vertical leap, plus an inch or two. Make the child work for it.

3. Two children? One piece of candy. Whoever pins the other one gets it.



Pedophile tested. Pedophile approved.

[-King-]

Why take the fun out of the holiday? You want to give the kids ammunition and stiff them. Geeze I am glad you were not around when I was trick or treating. I hope several of those bricks end up thrown through several of your windows. Cheap skate.

:eek:


Please let this be a joke post. No one can be this dumb. Please!

[LiveSteam]

Why take the fun out of the holiday? You want to give the kids ammunition and stiff them. Geeze I am glad you were not around when I was trick or treating. I hope several of those bricks end up thrown through several of your windows. Cheap skate.

ROFLROFLROFLROFLROFLROFLROFLROFLROFL

[Pioli Zombie]

Yes BoltWalt. They seriously are going to tie candy to bricks. Good Mary and Martha riding on a horse with Moses!

[Rain Man]

Why take the fun out of the holiday? You want to give the kids ammunition and stiff them. Geeze I am glad you were not around when I was trick or treating. I hope several of those bricks end up thrown through several of your windows. Cheap skate.

Cheapskate? Bricks cost money. I'm doing this to help promote fitness.

[BoltWalt]

We have way too many Holidays tied to food



made us a bunch of fat asses.
So I take it that you will be abstaining from thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter dinners.

[Kyle DeLexus]

So I take it that you will be abstaining from thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter dinners.

People have Easter dinner?

[007]

I just wish they would make Halloween fall on the last Friday of October every year so it is never on a school night. We do this for Memorial Day and Labor Day on Mondays so why not?

[kysirsoze]

Why take the fun out of the holiday? You want to give the kids ammunition and stiff them. Geeze I am glad you were not around when I was trick or treating. I hope several of those bricks end up thrown through several of your windows. Cheap skate.

So I take it that you will be abstaining from thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter dinners.

This fucking guy will troll anything.

[GloryDayz]

Well there are all those things.....then there's the improvement of having this witch ask for a trick or treat..... Tough call....

http://www.mypartyplanner.com/common/d_images/products/00/06/43/image_410605.jpg

[Lonewolf Ed]

No need to start a new thread, so happy Halloween, everyone! There is no full moon this year, so I will just be in my human form tonight. :p

And here is a little holiday mood music. Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=df3YCd0kdz4

[Frosty]

We have way too many Holidays tied to food



made us a bunch of fat asses.


It wouldn't be so bad if it was just a big meal on the actual holiday, like Thanksgiving. However, it seems like we are inundated with candy and treats from now through Easter.

Halloween, Christmas (which starts right after Halloween), Valentine's Day, Easter.

The candy companies need to get off their asses and come up with Memorial Day, 4th of July and Labor Day candy. Then it could be year 'round.

[Inspector]

We have a great deal of concern about the health and body fat of our neighborhood kids. That's why we hand out cigarettes.

But since we are sort of health freaks and all, we only use the low tar brands.

Must think of the kids well being first and foremost!

[Brock]

We have a great deal of concern about the health and body fat of our neighborhood kids. That's why we hand out cigarettes.

But since we are sort of health freaks and all, we only use the low tar brands.

Must think of the kids well being first and foremost!

They're a great appetite suppressant!

[stevieray]

They're a great appetite suppressant!

you guys should be neighbors..he gives out cigs, you give out cough drops.

brilliant!