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View Full Version : Chiefs Matt Cassel to be mauled by mountain lion


Hammock Parties
12-02-2011, 07:59 PM
LMAO

Haley says 'buddy system' is in effect with mountain lion near


http://www.nfl.com/news/story/09000d5d824ac66d/article/haley-says-buddy-system-is-in-effect-with-mountain-lion-near?module=HP11_around-the-league

As if the Kansas City Chiefs didn't have enough obstacles standing in their way this season, the team is now apparently contending with a mountain lion roaming near the team's practice facility.

Chiefs coach Todd Haley was asked during his media session on Friday if the rumors were true about the hulking cat.

"I've seen the pictures of that mountain lion, but I've heard a couple different rumors of how close it actually was to the vicinity," Haley said with a half smile. "But it's got a lot of guys running to their car quick at night, the buddy system's in use."

According to Wikipedia, the mountain lion is "a capable stalk-and-ambush predator" that "pursues a wide variety of prey." Good times.

Haley was asked if he was worried about walking through the parking lot after the sun sets.

"I just kind of hobble fast to the car, have it started, and jump in fast," he said.

With his impressive neck beard and overall grizzled look, we feel like Haley would handle himself well if he encountered the beast. Obviously it would end horribly, but he'd probably put up a decent fight.

Shogun
12-02-2011, 08:00 PM
I bet Haley has Matt go start his car for him, Buddy system.

Hammock Parties
12-02-2011, 08:00 PM
I'm worried about Romeo Crennel, that's a tasty, slow dinner.

Shogun
12-02-2011, 08:03 PM
Don't worry, Romeo has Becht as his buddy, great decoy, maybe except nobody even knows hes there. He has a sweet job.

Hammock Parties
12-02-2011, 08:04 PM
I hope Charles and Berry don't hang around the facility, I don't want them limping around in the parking lot.

Shogun
12-02-2011, 08:04 PM
whoever is Mcnuggets buddy has it best. He can be brought down easy after his 5th spin in place his buddy can get away in safety...Except eating Mccluster is like eating Chinese, you'll be hungry again in 10 minutes, Luckily for the moutain lion we have plenty of useless players on the team that can take a fall for Bowe, Hali, DJ, ect,..

Jenson71
12-02-2011, 08:05 PM
Would the NFL reward us a supplemental pick if one of our guys was eaten?

Say, Cassel?

BossChief
12-02-2011, 08:10 PM
haha

Its just Tamba

Chief_For_Life58
12-02-2011, 08:14 PM
I'm worried about Romeo Crennel, that's a tasty, slow dinner.

hahahahahhahaha


just get tamba out there to spear it. itll be his practice for the day before the game

Rain Man
12-02-2011, 08:25 PM
I hope Charles and Berry don't hang around the facility, I don't want them limping around in the parking lot.

No kidding. You know the lion is going to go after a limping prey if he has a choice.

listopencil
12-02-2011, 08:57 PM
It's Tebow.

Buck
12-02-2011, 08:59 PM
I didn't realize they had mountains in Kansas lol epic troll

Shogun
12-02-2011, 09:00 PM
I didn't realize they had mountains in Kansas
lol epic troll

Racks on racks on racks,..err or something like that.

Okie_Apparition
12-02-2011, 09:30 PM
Bailey ain't ate it yet

Sannyasi
12-02-2011, 09:36 PM
I actually had a dream about this, but I never thought it would actually happen.

GloryDayz
12-02-2011, 09:57 PM
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0Hn3AjTJj6U/TZHe3ragXGI/AAAAAAAAA1M/_SBk3dx61EE/s1600/med_funny-cat.jpg

GloryDayz
12-02-2011, 09:58 PM
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wAzjmbEohQE/TZHe142DBBI/AAAAAAAAA1I/hbFYVIXaUT0/s1600/Funny+Cat+Proceed.jpg

GloryDayz
12-02-2011, 10:00 PM
http://diggwallpapers.com/upload/DesktopWallpapers/cache/Funny-Cat-funny-cat-wallpapers-funny-cat-pictures-funny-cat-photos-8f8de9f3dd-800x600.jpg

ForeverChiefs58
12-02-2011, 10:13 PM
Someone go put some cat nip in Cassell's back pocket

O.city
12-02-2011, 10:15 PM
I better watch letting the dogs outside. Mountain lion might get them.

ThaVirus
12-02-2011, 10:15 PM
Probably not the place for this.... But I feel like I could take a mountain lion with my bare hands.

Bump
12-02-2011, 10:20 PM
maybe we'll get lucky and the kitty will get Cassel, then it wouldn't even be an option and we wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.

RealSNR
12-02-2011, 10:28 PM
Photographic evidence of the Truman Sports Complex mountain lion:

http://i.a.cnn.net/si/2005/writers/john_rolfe/07/12/getting.loose/p1_royals.jpg

BossChief
12-02-2011, 10:43 PM
Doing all that in this cold....it must have the heart of a



nevermind.

007
12-02-2011, 10:50 PM
Well it didn't get Kim Bauer so it has to go after Matt now.

Shogun
12-02-2011, 10:51 PM
Mountain Lion = Pissed off fucking Frank white eating a dear

Caseyguyrr
12-02-2011, 11:03 PM
I didn't realize they had mountains in Kansas lol epic troll

hey now, dont generalize, the practice facility is in missouri

Buck
12-02-2011, 11:07 PM
Oh god trolled.

bevischief
12-03-2011, 03:38 AM
It is a mental patient...

Skyy God
12-03-2011, 04:11 AM
If Cassel were to get eaten by a mountain lion, what compensatory pick would we get?

Red Dawg
12-03-2011, 05:28 AM
I'm worried about Romeo Crennel, that's a tasty, slow dinner.

That'sd some funny shit.

Mojo Jojo
12-03-2011, 05:33 AM
Ironic...football players are usually stalked by cougars.

rockymtnchief
12-03-2011, 07:06 AM
Probably not the place for this.... But I feel like I could take a mountain lion with my bare hands.

Barehanded, I'll put my money on a full grown cat. Toss in a knife and you have a chance.

This is a picture of a full grown "malnourished" cat.

http://thegoat.backcountry.com/files/2010/03/mountain_lion.jpg

loochy
12-03-2011, 08:00 AM
Barehanded, I'll put my money on a full grown cat. Toss in a knife and you have a chance.

This is a picture of a full grown "malnourished" cat.

http://thegoat.backcountry.com/files/2010/03/mountain_lion.jpg

*pisses pants*

Extra Point
12-03-2011, 09:28 AM
If Cassel were to get eaten by a mountain lion, what compensatory pick would we get?

Steak knife set, electric blanket, or mini-tool kit.

cabletech94
12-03-2011, 09:35 AM
Barehanded, I'll put my money on a full grown cat. Toss in a knife and you have a chance.

This is a picture of a full grown "malnourished" cat.

http://thegoat.backcountry.com/files/2010/03/mountain_lion.jpg

aaawwwwwwww. that guys just a big ol softie, givin his little kitty cat the hemlich.

i can remember as a kid in rural, heavily wooded ks (south of olathe)that there were no mountain lions, cougars, lynx' or whatevers, according to the conservations and other smart people.
almost hit 2 on the highway on separate occasions. also little brother found a huge claw. i mean the size of my sausage finger huge. on our property (120+ acres). that thing was awesome, but at the same time, HO-LY SHEEET!

orange
12-03-2011, 01:35 PM
Remember, Chiefs:

You don't have to outrun the mountain lion, you just have to outrun your buddy.

Epic Fail 007
12-03-2011, 01:41 PM
I didn't realize they had mountains in Kansas lol epic troll

they are not in kansas,lol

Epic Fail 007
12-03-2011, 01:42 PM
Probably not the place for this.... But I feel like I could take a mountain lion with my bare hands.

your so wrong

GloryDayz
12-03-2011, 01:43 PM
Remember, Chiefs:

You don't have to outrun the mountain lion, you just have to outrun your buddy.

:thumb:

tk13
12-03-2011, 01:47 PM
Didn't Allen Bailey kill an alligator once or something? They should just send him out there.

Okie_Apparition
12-03-2011, 01:56 PM
They should bring in HErm to give a mountain lion in the parking lot safety speech
A combo of, play to win the game/ it's the will not the skill/ & you only need one

Hammock Parties
12-03-2011, 01:58 PM
Remember, Chiefs:

You don't have to outrun the mountain lion, you just have to outrun your buddy.

Sources say Thomas Jones has begun sleeping at Arrowhead.

Aries Walker
12-03-2011, 02:01 PM
Barehanded, I'll put my money on a full grown cat. Toss in a knife and you have a chance.

I don't think you have much of a chance with a knife, either. Toss in a suit of armor and a claymore and you should do all right, though.

Okie_Apparition
12-03-2011, 02:04 PM
The cat's spread out paw could cover your face
then rip it the fuck off

Thig Lyfe
12-03-2011, 03:00 PM
I don't think we can accurately judge Matt Cassel's ability to not get eaten by a mountain lion until we get better protection on the line.

Reerun_KC
12-03-2011, 03:04 PM
I don't think we can accurately judge Matt Cassel's ability to not get eaten by a mountain lion until we get better protection on the line.

Well at least we know that our line cant protect the savior either...

Bwana
12-04-2011, 05:58 AM
Probably not the place for this.... But I feel like I could take a mountain lion with my bare hands.

Um.............no.

milkman
12-04-2011, 06:20 AM
Sources say Thomas Jones has begun sleeping at Arrowhead.

LMAO

gblowfish
12-04-2011, 10:48 AM
I'll be willing to bet you that the Chiefs are the only fan base that is actually in favor of their starting QB being mauled by a cougar.

In week two he was mauled by Lions, so I guess it's all good....