Family sayings that stuck with you.

[KcMizzou]

So, tonight I've been on the computer a lot. My younger son's dying to get on.

When I'm watching football all day Sunday, he's dying to get on the TV so he can play 360. We go through this all the time. Whatever I'm doing is much cooler that what he's doing. (unless I'm in bed reading)

My mom (Who is awesome) once said to me, "If I ate a shit sandwich, you'd want a bite." It totally makes sense now.

[durtyrute]

"Don't put off til tomorrow what you can do today."

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

"you damn kids!"

[FAX]

"Please put down the knife, dad."

FAX

[durtyrute]

My friends mom used to tell him when he was getting ready that "he moved slower than whale shit at the bottom of the ocean."

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

My dad used to say "there's a lot of quit in that boy" long before Ron White made it famous.

[plbrdude]

my dad used to tell me to want in one hand and crap in the other; then see which one gets full first.

[FAX]

"Why am I turning in circles, Mom?"

"Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor."

FAX

[ChiefRocka]

"Sleep when you're dead"

[BigMeatballDave]

You'd sell your asshole if you could shit thru your ribs.

[dtebbe]

"Send em' to school and they eat the books" - pops

DT

[Planetman]

When my Dad watches me do ANYTHING that is not EXACTLY the way he does it, especially if I'm having a difficult time doing said thing, he'll say, " They way you're doing that reminds me of 2 old people fucking."

[KcMizzou]

You'd sell your asshole if you could shit thru your ribs.LMAO Wow.

[BigMeatballDave]

You could tear up an anvil in a sandbox.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

"Sleep when you're dead"

My ex FIL used to say that to which I'd retort "I'll sleep while I'm alive so I don't end up dead sooner thank you." Mr. hardest working guy ever took naps ever day so **** him.

[Otter]

"you're going to find yourself outside looking in"

[BigMeatballDave]

You couldn't pour piss out of a boot with directions written on a hill and someone reading them to you.

[KcMizzou]

You couldn't pour piss out of a boot with directions written on a hill and someone reading them to you.That should be "on the heel" shouldn't it?

I think your dad (or whoever) may have been right.

[FAX]

"Send em' to school and they eat the books" - pops

DT

Same here.

How funny.

FAX

[FlaChief58]

Goddammit son, you gone & dun knocked up your sister again

[luv]

My mom's mom must have been totally superstitious. My mom used to always say "my mom always said....". Besides all of the superstitious stuff, my dad used to always say "When I say no, I mean no." Not really a saying, but it definitely always held true.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

Goddammit son, you gone & dun knocked up your sister again

So she was hot? Pics or GTFO.

[KcMizzou]

My mom's mom must have been totally superstitious. My mom used to always say "my mom always said....". Besides all of the superstitious stuff, my dad used to always say "When I say no, I mean no." No really a saying, but it definitely always held true.I need to be better at that as a parent.

[pimpchief]

My mother was deep and insightful.

"A true friend never truely follows."

"You never trust a man who doesn't drink coffee."

"Here, smoke this Meth it'll help your back."

[luv]

I need to be better at that as a parent.

My mom started with no, but if you could get her up to a maybe you knew you had it. If she meant no, she'd say "go ask your dad". That's when we knew the answer was really no.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

My mom's mom must have been totally superstitious. My mom used to always say "my mom always said....". Besides all of the superstitious stuff, my dad used to always say "When I say no, I mean no." Not really a saying, but it definitely always held true.

As a parent no means no. I'm really glad my ex and I always stuck with that. It sure as hell made things a lot easier later.

[FlaChief58]

So she was hot? Pics or GTFO.


She looks just like momma

[BigMeatballDave]

That should be "on the heel" shouldn't it?

I think your dad (or whoever) may have been right.

It could have been meant that way. LOL

These came from my dad's dad. His family came from W. Virginia. :)

[KcMizzou]

My mother was deep and insightful.

"A true friend never truely follows."

"You never trust a man who doesn't drink coffee."

"Here, smoke this Meth it'll help your back."LMAO

[Fish]

I picked up "Okie Dokie" from my mother. I say it all the time and it irritates me when I do.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

She looks just like momma

I'd hit it.

[KcMizzou]

My mom started with no, but if you could get her up to a maybe you knew you had it. If she meant no, she'd say "go ask your dad". That's when we knew the answer was really no.See, I'm more like your mom... but I'm the only parent. Gotta draw the line somewhere.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

My mother was deep and insightful.

"A true friend never truely follows."

"You never trust a man who doesn't drink coffee."

"Here, smoke this Meth it'll help your back."

Joey's back!

[FlaChief58]

I'd hit it.

HEY! That's my sister you're talkin about! :cuss:

[pr_capone]

Sana, sana,

Heal, heal,

colita de rana,

little tail of the frog,

Si no sanas hoy,

If you don't heal today,

sanarás mañana.

you'll heal tomorrow.

To this day I still say this when my nieces get an "owie".

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

HEY! That's my sister you're talkin about! :cuss:

You can have mine if I can have yours.

[hometeam]

"do what now?"

my mom always said it. i forever say it.

[FlaChief58]

You can have mine if I can have yours.

Pics?

[pimpchief]

"do what now?"

my mom always said it. i forever say it.

I relate to this post.

[ghak99]

"Tell'em all you love 'em"

"The best way to get over one is to get under another."

"Don't be picky, the worst piece of ass I ever have was still wonderful."

[Bugeater]

"Go out and get a goddamn job you worthless piece of monkey shit"

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

Pics?

I don't have any. She's 5' 11" and blonde. I guess some guys would think she's ok looking but she's my sister so ewww. She's married to a guy I don't like so a CP member has to be better.

[Coach]

"This mickey mouse shit"

[KcMizzou]

"Go out and get a goddamn job you worthless piece of monkey shit"And you passed that on... didn't ya?

[pimpchief]

My dad used the word bastard alot, bastard this, and bastard that. He passed that along to my vocabulary. I try to not use it, though.

[FlaChief58]

I don't have any. She's 5' 11" and blonde. I guess some guys would think she's ok looking but she's my sister so ewww. She's married to a guy I don't like so a CP member has to be better.

If she's over tree fitty, deal. I'll hook up the trailer & come git her

[pimpchief]

"You little faggots." Was a good one from my mom's girlfriend.

[T-Town]

One I get a lot from my dad is "You'd screw up hogans goat" but any more when I do something stupid he just baa's at me.

My grandpa has hundreds but some of my personal favorites

- "Ill stomp a mud hole in your ass and walk it dry"
- "I could shit through a screen door and not hit a wire"
- "You're windier than a bag full of assholes"
- "Hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock"
- When something irritates him: "If you had that and a feather up your ass we'd both be tickled"

[Fish]

I still eat breakfast, dinner, and supper. Not breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Never got over that one..

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

If she's over tree fitty, deal. I'll hook up the trailer & come git her

She's about average weight I would say. Sorry.

[FlaChief58]

She's about average weight I would say. Sorry.

Dangit

[T-Town]

Hornier than a three peckered billy goat

[ghak99]

"Damn son, She's hotter than a freshly fucked fox in a forest fire."

"You could fuck up a wet dream."

"I swear, you could tear up a crow bar in a sand pile"

[KcMizzou]

"Well shit the bed, Lester!"

[KcMizzou]

"Gotta see a man about a horse" (going to the restroom)

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

"Gotta see a man about a horse" (going to the restroom)

My dad said "gotta go to Niagara Falls."

[luv]

My mom grew up in a very small town (there was a post office, a general store, and a one room schoolhouse for K-8). If you needed to go to the grocery store, department store, gas station, etc. you had to go to the largest nearby town that had those things. Growing up, anytime we were going to the store, my mom always said we were "going to town" even though we lived in town...lol. I still say it a lot, too.

[luv]

I still eat breakfast, dinner, and supper. Not breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Never got over that one..

I grew up saying the former. Not really sure when I changed to the latter. Same thing goes for pop vs. soda. I grew up saying pop, but I say soda now. My mom calls it all "Coke"...lol.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

I grew up saying the former. Not really sure when I changed to the latter. Same thing goes for pop vs. soda. I grew up saying pop, but I say soda now. My mom calls it all "Coke"...lol.

I could start a whole thread about this.

[KcMizzou]

My mom grew up in a very small town (there was a post office, a general store, and a one room schoolhouse for K-8). If you needed to go to the grocery store, department store, gas station, etc. you had to go to the largest nearby town that had those things. Growing up, anytime we were going to the store, my mom always said we were "going to town" even though we lived in town...lol. I still say it a lot, too.I get that. In Weston, we'd drive 30 miles or so to Leavenworth to go to the big grocery store... and usually stop at Sonic and eat in the car. (it was very cool, as a kid)

[RJ]

Finer'n frog's hair.

Finer'n a frog's hair split two ways.

If the good Lord's willing and the creek don't rise.

Fuck the Raiders.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

I get that. In Weston, we'd drive 30 miles or so to Leavenworth to go to the big grocery store... and usually stop at Sonic and eat in the car. (it was very cool, as a kid)

We "went to Hiawatha" for anything we needed. They had a discount store and a few restaurants. If we were making a whole day of it we "went to Topeka."

[Psyko Tek]

humph (my grandfather used it ) caught my self using it
and it works

monkey fucking a football, my dad's

[chefsos]

Dad, when I didn't triangulate properly and found myself standing between him and the TV: "You make a better door than a window."

[Psyko Tek]

put your left hand on your right ear
and your right hand on your left ear

now pull your head outta your ass
my dad

[Rain Man]

"I'm going to stomp a mudhole in you."

[KcMizzou]

put your left hand on your right ear
and your right hand on your left ear

now pull your head outta your ass
my dadLMAO

[KcMizzou]

Dad, when I didn't triangulate properly and found myself standing between him and the TV: "You make a better door than a window."I say that to my boys. Quickly followed by, "Get the hell out of the way!"

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

Dad, when I didn't triangulate properly and found myself standing between him and the TV: "You make a better door than a window."

My dad used to say that too. I always asked him if he could open me. He never came back.

[KcMizzou]

TIL "triangulate improperly" means "Got between Dad and the TV"

[RealSNR]

This has been brought up before, but my dad always used the phrase "fall ass over tea kettle into ________"

Another one that I stole from him: "That's built sturdier than a brick shit house"

[Simply Red]

mercy is one they'd say a lot, it's like saying 'meh' sort of. Especially my uncle, he'd use that one a lot.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

TIL "triangulate improperly" means "Got between Dad and the TV"

GF got between me and the tv during last weeks Chiefs game and when I yelled "WTF are you doing?" she paused and said "helping you miss the Casselception." She's so awesome.

[chefsos]

I spent a lot of years thinking that my dad invented all of these sayings.

[J Diddy]

My dad used to say that too. I always asked him if he could open me. He never came back.

I'd been afraid to say that to my dad. He would have opened me alright. It would have taken some stitches at the ol er to get closed.

[J Diddy]

GF got between me and the tv during last weeks Chiefs game and when I yelled "WTF are you doing?" she paused and said "helping you miss the Casselception." She's so awesome.

You should have bought her flowers just because she shielded you from the pain.

[KcMizzou]

GF got between me and the tv during last weeks Chiefs game and when I yelled "WTF are you doing?" she paused and said "helping you miss the Casselception." She's so awesome.That can't be true.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

I'd been afraid to say that to my dad. He would have opened me alright. It would have taken some stitches at the ol er to get closed.

My dad was a skinny fuck. I could have taken him in 6th grade. Plus he wasn't an agressive person.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

That can't be true.

It's based on truth. She doesn't care about football or sports at all but she understands I do. She did get in the way and Cassel did throw an int and she did say something to that effect lol. As long as she lays on me and naps while I watch the game I like her heh.

[KcMizzou]

I always thought tangling with your old man was a right of passage. Kinda part of becoming a man. I did it... and lost. But my dad's cool as hell, always was. Mom was much harder on me than he was. But as a teenager, a young buck... it's natural to clash with your father.

[KcMizzou]

It's based on truth. She doesn't care about football or sports at all but she understands I do. She did get in the way and Cassel did throw an int and she did say something to that effect lol. As long as she lays on me and naps while I watch the game I like her heh.Marry her.

[Dr. Johnny Fever]

Marry her.

Neither of us want to get married again. I think that's part of why it works. Why ruin a good thing?

[Chiefs316]

Breakfast at the great aunts was "shit on a shingle" Toast with sausage gravy...yum

[KcMizzou]

Breakfast at the great aunts was "shit on a shingle" Toast with sausage gravy...yumSounds awesome.

[Simply Red]

Incorrect and negative rep.

For this is 'Shit on the Shingles'



http://i.imgur.com/Zy1NF.jpg

[Buehler445]

My family has had several of these.

One that hasn't been mentioned is "hotter than a whore on dollar day."

[BillSelfsTrophycase]

Women don't think like people

[J Diddy]

Incorrect and negative rep.

For this is 'Shit on the Shingles'



http://i.imgur.com/Zy1NF.jpg

His definition is what I know. I think you're trapped in some weird ass fucking Hormel alternate universe.

[Frosty]

His definition is what I know. I think you're trapped in some weird ass ****ing Hormel alternate universe.

When I was a kid, we had chipped beef (in a gravy) on toast, which my dad called SOS (shit on a shingle). He'd had it while in the military and liked it.

When I went into the Army, they had something that they called shit on a shingle but it was hamburger in gravy over toast. I think the definition is pretty fluid.

[Planetman]

When admiring a large breasted woman "I bet that gal has no problems breathing. Look at the set of lungs on her!" - Dad

[acesn8s]

"Here is a knife and fork. Go play in the street."

[acesn8s]

That should be "on the heel" shouldn't it?

I think your dad (or whoever) may have been right.ROFL

[acesn8s]

My dad used the word bastard alot, bastard this, and bastard that. He passed that along to my vocabulary. I try to not use it, though.Do as your father says, you bastard!:cuss:

[acesn8s]

I grew up saying the former. Not really sure when I changed to the latter. Same thing goes for pop vs. soda. I grew up saying pop, but I say soda now. My mom calls it all "Coke"...lol.I saw a map once of the areas of the U.S. that called the drink all three of those. "Coke" is a southern Missouri thing. "Pop" is a northern thing, and "soda is a southern thing, generally speaking.

[mikey23545]

Shit fire, save matches!

[Psyko Tek]

"Here is a knife and fork. Go play in the street."

I like that may use it
it will make them think

[bowener]

Rattle up a tin can
Daddy shot a bear
Shot him in the butthole
Didn't hit a hair.

I told that during 1st grade show and tell.

[Tribal Warfare]

straighten up, and fly her right.

I was laughing my ass off when Pioli used this saying during a predraft interview.My dad and grandfather are only ones I knew that said this.

[acesn8s]

I like that may use it
it will make them thinkIt sure does. I miss my son. :sulk:

[2bikemike]

My dad used to always tell me " Boy you'd fug up a crowbar in a sandbox"

Mom would say "Chit in one hand and wish in the other and tell me which one fills up first"

[FAX]

straighten up, and fly her right.

I was laughing my ass off when Pioli used this saying during a predraft interview.My dad and grandfather are only ones I knew that said this.

My father used to say that one, also. My uncles, too.

It's strange reading this thread. There are probably a dozen "sayings" I recall from my childhood. They must be Midwestern sayings, I guess.

See if you recognize this one ... whenever I was injured or hurt on the job, in an effort to motivate me, my Dad would say, "It's too far from your heart to kill you."

FAX

[Scorp]

Grandpa: "Treat the Whores like Queens and the Queens like Whores!"

[notorious]

Believe half of what you see, and nothing of what you hear.

[rad]

Whenever my Grandpa used to send me to the shed or garage for a tool or whatever, when I got back he'd say "If they're ever gonna hang me, I hope they send you for the rope".

[bevischief]

It take's a big dog to weigh a ton.

[Buehler445]

Whenever my Grandpa used to send me to the shed or garage for a tool or whatever, when I got back he'd say "If they're ever gonna hang me, I hope they send you for the rope".

ROFL

[Buehler445]

There have been a lot of tear up ones in here.

Dad's was, "you could break an anvil with a rubber mallet"

[notorious]

There have been a lot of tear up ones in here.

Dad's was, "you could break an anvil with a rubber mallet"

I was one of those kids, too.


I broke the hitch on the sweeps while fertilizing once. LMAO

My brother (not too long ago) closed the grain cart auger while it was running. ROFL

[Nzoner]

Grandpa when irritated and/or disgusted,"Great day in the morning!!"

Dad to me and lil bro,"why don't you kids go play on the train tracks."

[Buehler445]

I was one of those kids, too.


I broke the hitch on the sweeps while fertilizing once. LMAO

My brother (not too long ago) closed the grain cart auger while it was running. ROFL

LMAO

I grew out of it.

[notorious]

LMAO

I grew out of it.

That happens when you are the only one that can fix the ****-ups.


I learned that really quickly when I started my wood floor business.


On a side note, I think the auger on our old 300 bushel grain cart had more welding rod in it than origninal metal. 7th gear over sprinkler tracks doesn't mix for very long.

[munkey]

You always knew you were in trouble when my mother would call you out by your full name....and if you ever asked my dad where you at? He would always respond "somewhere between the a and the t...

[rocks]

Its hotter than a popcorn fart!

[Gonzo]

My dad was a fly-boy in the USAF so a lot of his vernacular was imported from his work.
"You're as fucked up as a navigator with a bent slide rule and a hangover."
He did 2 tours in Nam as well, so I'd get a lot of pigeon English on occasion.

"Boy, we need to Dee Dee Mau" (sp?) which means gtfo.

[Stewie]

"I'm sweating like a whore in church." /dad

"isha" /Swedish grandma. All three of my sisters still say isha to the little ones when they're making a mess.

[Gonzo]

"it's hotter than a freshly fucked fox in a Forrest fire."
"it's colder than a nun's cunt on Sunday"

[ghak99]

Mom was no where near as creative or outspoken as dad and grandpa but..

"You kids are driving me up a wall"

"Go play in the street"

[ghak99]

"I'm sweating like a whore in church." /dad

LMAO

You just reminded me of my Grandpa's Racist southern Baptist church version of this.

[notorious]

It's colder than a witch's nipple. /notorious's saying

[KcMizzou]

It's colder than a witch's nipple. /notorious's sayingI always heard it as "colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra"

[notorious]

I always heard it as "colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra"

That's pretty good. LMAO

[notorious]

Hotter than a coalminer's ass.

[scorpio]

My grandma used to say "Sometimes I wish I was rich instead of so damn good-looking."
Posted via Mobile Device

[Raiderhater58]

I always heard it as "colder than a well diggers ass"

[jjchieffan]

My grandad had more sayings than I can remember. But here are a few.

A penny saved is a penny earned
It's not a bargain if you don't need it
I'm sweating like a ni**er at an election ( I apologize if that one offends anyone. He wasn't being racist. Just something he said)
You're like a bull in a china shop
One boy is half a man. Two boys are no man at all
If you take care of your pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves
You can't out give God(when talking about tithing)

[stevieray]

yer gettin too big for yer britches

give me some sugar

goodness gracious me

[Fat Elvis]

That politician is so crooked they'll have to screw him into the ground when he dies.

[Planetman]

"You couldn't get laid in monkey whore house with a bag full of bananas."

[Donger]

"You're big enough and ugly enough to do it yourself!" - Mum

"Do you own fucking laundry, boy!" - Mum

"Boys, put your penises away and stop chasing the girls!" - Mum

"Right, enough of this laying around nonsense!" - Dad

"You think you're fucking men, eh!? Right, (zip) on the fucking table, right now!" - Dad

[T-post Tom]

My friends mom used to tell him when he was getting ready that "he moved slower than whale shit at the bottom of the ocean."

At my house it was, "Colder than whale poop at the bottom of the ocean."

[Omaha]

Son, never fuck a fat chick.

[Radar Chief]

Stupid people: couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.

Gays: queer as a three dollar bill.

Acting up: I'll slap a hair lip on ya.

[Imon Yourside]

<iframe width="854" height="510" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/x-9o3RRHI2g" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Raiderhater]

Individual: You know what?

Dad: No, but I know his brother who.

[Raiderhater]

Another of my Dad's favorites -

"What does that have to do with the price of butter in Moscow?"

[Omaha]

He's uglier than a bucket of assholes stirred.

[Raiderhater]

Someone gets asked why they are wearing sunglasses on an over cast day, Dad jumps in with, "Hey, when your cool, the sun always shines."

[Demonpenz]

Bump on a log.

[Stewie]

Another of my Dad's favorites -

"What does that have to do with the price of butter in Moscow?"

Replace butter in Moscow with tea in China.

[Planetman]

Son, never **** a fat chick.

Fat and ugly go away in the dark, boy.

[Raiderhater]

"it's hotter than a freshly fucked fox in a Forrest fire."
"it's colder than a nun's cunt on Sunday"

It's hotter than two rats f#cking in wool sock.

[Buehler445]

Hotter than a coalminer's ass.

I always heard it as "colder than a well diggers ass"

This.

Dad also always told me I was cruisin' for a bruisin'

[munkey]

Wanna knuckle sandwich?

[KS Smitty]

One of my favorites from my dad: Liars figure and figures lie.

When Mom's sick she has the epizootie.

[Radar Chief]

Ugly enough to scare the dark out of a closet.
Breath would knock a buzzard off a shit truck.

[RippedmyFlesh]

Johnny go get me a beer from the fridge

Dad left no room for error.

[Dayze]

To some awful smelling person "he/she could knock a buzzed of a shit wagon"

Ugly women "she could make a train take a dirt road"

Being shitfaced "drunker than a hooters goat". . My brothers and I still have zero Idea how this equates to drunkenness.

First time chaning my spark plugs on my first car Olds 442. Having trouble getting plug to thread, and my dad says "put a little hair around it and I bet you could find it"

[ghak99]

First time chaning my spark plugs on my first car Olds 442. Having trouble getting plug to thread, and my dad says "put a little hair around it and I bet you could find it"

LMAO

Can't believe I forgot about that one.



Just remembered Grandpa giving me the "if it wasn't for the hole with hair around it they would have been hunted to extinction long ago" when he found me down and out one morning.

[craneref]

My Grandmother used to say "I feel like I been drug thorugh hell and beat in the ass with a dead rabbit!" when she didn't feel well. Still not sure what it means, but it sure is descriptive!! :-) I use it all the time!

[hometeam]

My grandma used to always say 'Ain't you ready' meaning 'you so crazy' or something along those lines

[Bewbies]

The time I helped my dad buy a suit for my wedding. He looked at the price, and the salesman:

"My butthole ain't lined in gold!"

I could share about the time I was 12 and my dad told me his current wife's (his third) pussy smelled like a rotten toilet.

Or the time he told me I could have any one of a million dads but only one mom. My mom found great offense in this, my dad failed to see what he'd really said.

Or my youngest brother being about 10 and complaining about his teacher. "Is she feeding you? Is she fucking you? Then she don't matter...."

"Buy you books and send you to school and all you think about is fucking the teacher..." My dad told me when I was in 5th grade.

I can go all day...

[Raiderhater]

Wanna knuckle sandwich?


My grand dad used to mess with us by saying, "I'll knock the fart outta you".

[CosmicPal]

Son, you have illusions of grandeur.

[Raiderhater]

"Who hit him in the ass with a sour apple this morning?"

[Easy 6]

What do you want, egg in your beer?

[Megbert]

My mom would say this "Now who's ass is the blackest?" when pointing out she was right and the other person was wrong.

My dad would say "That's the gubment fucking you in the ass with the big green weenie"

Dad: 'Son fucking your mom was like fucking a wet sponge'.

[brorth]

You want fair?

Go to Sedalia in August.

[mesmith31]

"Son, I've done square danced twice in towns you ain't even heard of before!"

[shitgoose]

Gramps-

You're fucking this cat I'm just holding the tail..

The only way you could be dumber is to be bigger

I'm fuller than a junk yard goat (after a large meal)

[Dayze]

Oh, when my dad will sneeze really loudly a few times in a row, he'll yell "shit fire"! At the end of the last sneeze.


.....now I do that shit.

[Braincase]

'Want' in one hand, shit in the other. See which one fills up faster.

[manchambo]

My grandpa used to say "that's like feeding strawberries to a jackass." for example, after Roseanne sang the star spangled banner, he said that watching her was like feeding strawberries to a jackass.

He also said "cripe Pete" a lot. I say that now.

[KChiefs1]

Dad to me: You don't know shit from Shinola.

[Dayze]

When trying to juggle too many things/priorities my dad would say "it's like stuffing 5 pounds of shit in a 3 pound bucket"

Or "up to your ass in alligators"