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Lzen
08-20-2013, 02:21 PM
<article class="full-article" data-article-id="33535">The NFL’s Top 10 Running Backs

Aug 19, 2013
http://o.onionstatic.com/images/23/23193/original/700.jpg?4272

With football training camps underway, Onion Sports is preparing fans for the upcoming 2013 NFL season by ranking players at every position. Here’s a helpful guide to the league’s best running backs.

10. DeMarco Murray: Onion Sports felt obligated to put a player from the Cowboys on this list so whiny fans in Dallas will stop complaining


9. Reggie Bush: Has all the good qualities you look for in a running back and yet, alas, how true that many perfect parts may form an imperfect, unsettling whole


8. Michael Vick: The talented Philadelphia tailback is expected to utilize some trick throwing plays in Chip Kelly’s new offense


7. Frank Gore: Coming off a season in which he racked up 259 carries for 1,212 yards, Gore seems poised to rack up 259 carries for 1,212 yards


6. Maurice Jones-Drew: Dominates the backfield with a mixture of athleticism and explosive speed that he hopes will be enough to help him break free from any contract


5. C.J. Spiller: In prime position to ride Kevin Kolb’s futility all season long


4. Trent Richardson: After an impressive rookie season for the Browns, don’t be surprised if this year he breaks out for over 1,000 completely wasted yards


3. Ray Rice: Quick feet and small stature should allow him to blow through the new vacancies in the Ravens’ offensive line


2. Arian Foster: Tough running back who proved doubters wrong that he wasn’t durable enough to handle the punishing disappointment of playing for the Texans


1. Adrian Peterson: Stiff-arm has dramatically improved since he began using the hand not carrying the ball




http://www.theonion.com/articles/the-nfls-top-10-running-backs,33535/


</article>

ptlyon
08-20-2013, 02:23 PM
Fucking hilarious! ROFL

Halfcan
08-20-2013, 02:25 PM
WTF???

Thig Lyfe
08-20-2013, 02:26 PM
WTF???

hi

jd1020
08-20-2013, 02:26 PM
Michael Vick? Ummmmm...

Marcellus
08-20-2013, 02:27 PM
At first I was like wut? Then I was ROFL

Tombstone RJ
08-20-2013, 02:28 PM
meh, subpar for The Funion IMHO...

Marcellus
08-20-2013, 02:28 PM
Michael Vick? Ummmmm...

Read article, use mind to process what was read, then post.

Common mistake around here.

BlackHelicopters
08-20-2013, 02:28 PM
Clever

Quesadilla Joe
08-20-2013, 02:28 PM
Michael Vick? Ummmmm...

:facepalm:

Mr. Arrowhead
08-20-2013, 02:30 PM
somebody is missing

Dayze
08-20-2013, 02:36 PM
NO Charles?!!!!! WTF???



~

BigMeatballDave
08-20-2013, 02:37 PM
Oh, Onion

Ace Gunner
08-20-2013, 02:39 PM
8. Michael Vick: The talented Philadelphia tailback is expected to utilize some trick throwing plays in Chip Kelly’s new offense


ROFL

Rasputin
08-20-2013, 02:39 PM
somebody is missing

NO Charles?!!!!! WTF???



~


I think the Tennessee Tits have a running back missing off this list too.

Marcellus
08-20-2013, 02:40 PM
This thread is an awesome example of how well people on CP actually read and then comprehend what they are reading.

Instead its obvious a large number just brush over the post and then react.

LMAO

Marcellus
08-20-2013, 02:40 PM
I think the Tennessee Tits have a running back missing off this list too.

ROFL

Ace Gunner
08-20-2013, 02:41 PM
This thread is an awesome example of how well people on CP actually read and then comprehend what they are reading.

Instead its obvious a large number just brush over the post and then react.

LMAO

and rep :D

jd1020
08-20-2013, 02:41 PM
Read article, use mind to process what was read, then post.

Common mistake around here.

I get that its sarcastic jabs/a joke, but I could actually buy the first 6 on the list so I can't tell if they just filled in the rest with 1 liners.

Meh.

Halfcan
08-20-2013, 02:42 PM
I get that its sarcastic jabs/a joke, but I could actually buy the first 6 on the list so I can't tell if they just filled in the rest with 1 liners.

Meh.

This. :rolleyes:

Chiefs316
08-20-2013, 02:43 PM
ROFL @ article and people who don't read it before posting...

Ace Gunner
08-20-2013, 02:43 PM
https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/5934436096/hF44EE5C9/

Radar Chief
08-20-2013, 02:45 PM
9. Reggie Bush: Has all the good qualities you look for in a running back and yet, alas, how true that many perfect parts may form an imperfect, unsettling whole

Considering the source I was expecting something about Kim Kardashian here.

loochy
08-20-2013, 02:56 PM
Considering the source I was expecting something about Kim Kardashian here.

Nah, she's in the "Top 10 Nose Tackles" article

Rain Man
08-20-2013, 02:56 PM
They should have included Von Miller since he's running from the law.

Easy 6
08-21-2013, 04:14 PM
LMAO the one on Richardson is prescient.