Watching Kids

[Otter]

Without getting into too much detail I'm back in my home town in PA for family reasons. I got stuck watching 4 nieces and nephews between the ages of 5 and 12 while my brother and sisters were out taking care of some business.

I've dealt with everything between spilled drinks, broken glass, a momentary lost child while trying to make sure the others didn't get lost in the process to a 20 pound dumbbells getting rolled down the steps while I was trying to have 10 minutes of peace trying to take a dump which I thought was a child rolling down the steps from the sound of the noise.

Literally got up so fast I forgot to wipe my ass and didn't realize it till 20 minutes later.

I just want to say to all the parents of ChiefPlanet, God Bless You. If I had kids I'm willing to wager they would have about a 60:40 ratio of surviving till they became self sufficient. I don't know how you do it.

I'm getting drunk right now and having a vasectomy tomorrow. And no, I'm not kidding.

**** that! At least I'll be in the right state to finally watch a Chiefs game for once. Had to let that one out.

[Simply Red]

my hero.

[Chief_For_Life58]

k

[Cephalic Trauma]

I do not envy you. Kids are just little drunk adults.

[Otter]

my hero.

We lead pretty similar life styles from my understanding. I'll fly you up next time for help.

Let me bitch dammit! :banghead:

[HonestChieffan]

My 63 year old brother and his wife just took custody, temporary, of a 4 month old. Im taking him wine this weekend. He said he had forgotten the joys of burping and diapers. Bless him for being a good person but man...i could not do it

[The Franchise]

It's called raising your kids to not be destructive little assholes.

[Bowser]

This is why it's a good idea to read a thread before you come to conclusions on it beforehand.

[CrazyPhuD]

http://www.rechargeablestungun.com/Images/Big%20New%20Cattle%20Prod.jpg

If it's good enough for Lipizzaner stallions, it's good enough for kids.

[notorious]

It's called raising your kids to not be destructive little assholes.

This.

[FlaChief58]

2 words....Duct tape

[OrtonsPiercedTaint]

Eaglets? Burn down the house

[Frazod]

Make sure the 12-year-old doesn't have a porn stash! :p

[Otter]

It's called raising your kids to not be destructive little assholes.

Heh, this is why I rarely post anymore. Forget it.

[Baby Lee]

Leave them a hamper hamster.

[Bugeater]

I'm not really a fan either. Glad I stopped at one and even more glad that he's an adult now.

[Fritz88]

Is there any way, any possible way, to get your undies? The ones you wore after you forgot to wipe?

Thanks.

[seclark]

ROFLIs there any way, any possible way, to get your undies? The ones you wore after you forgot to wipe?

Thanks.

ROFL

[Iowanian]

Welcome to my life.

[MOhillbilly]

http://www.rechargeablestungun.com/Images/Big%20New%20Cattle%20Prod.jpg

If it's good enough for Lipizzaner stallions, it's good enough for kids.

Had a bull get a piece of wire wrapped around his back leg just above the hoof.
When I ran him down into the shoot his hips got stuck. I kicked at him and whacked him and no dice.
give him the hot shot and nothing.
That ain't good.

Busted him four times in a row and he sanded the alley and loaded.

Random hotshot story.

[trndobrd]

Naps for everyone!

[NewChief]

Kids are alright once they get to about 5 and become somewhat self sufficient. My wife and I did not enjoy the baby and toddler stage.

Watching that many in that age spread requires enlisting the help of the older ones for the younger ones. Also, it's best to take them to do something (even if it's just a walk in the woods or neighborhood), not sit around the house. Nothing worse than a house full of bored kids.

[MOhillbilly]

Kids are alright once they get to about 5 and become somewhat self sufficient. My wife and I did not enjoy the baby and toddler stage.

Watching that many in that age spread requires enlisting the help of the older ones for the younger ones. Also, it's best to take them to do something (even if it's just a walk in the woods or neighborhood), not sit around the house. Nothing worse than a house full of bored kids.
My kids never ever ever say they are bored.

Ever.

[NewChief]

My kids never ever ever say they are bored.

Ever.

Hah. I tell mine that shit all the time when they're bugging me to do something with them. I'm like, "When I was your age, I tried to sneak my ass out of the house before my parents noticed me sitting around doing nothing and put me to work. I wasn't trying to ask my parents to entertain me, I was trying to AVOID THEM AT ALL COST lest I spend the day weeding the flower beds, mowing, scrubbing toilets, etc..."

[KS Smitty]

Hah. I tell mine that shit all the time when they're bugging me to do something with them. I'm like, "When I was your age, I tried to sneak my ass out of the house before my parents noticed me sitting around doing nothing and put me to work. I wasn't trying to ask my parents to entertain me, I was trying to AVOID THEM AT ALL COST lest I spend the day weeding the flower beds, mowing, scrubbing toilets, etc..."

and then do you put them to work?

Otter, that was just plain mean of your siblings to leave you alone with their kids, knowing that you were in over your head before you began. But I bet the kids will be telling "when Uncle Otter watched us" stories for a long time. ROFL

[MOhillbilly]

Hah. I tell mine that shit all the time when they're bugging me to do something with them. I'm like, "When I was your age, I tried to sneak my ass out of the house before my parents noticed me sitting around doing nothing and put me to work. I wasn't trying to ask my parents to entertain me, I was trying to AVOID THEM AT ALL COST lest I spend the day weeding the flower beds, mowing, scrubbing toilets, etc..."

I told em it was a curse word and they've never said it again.

[Prison Bitch]

Congrats! Oh wait you're just babysitting. Ok now everyone can be honest, little kids suck

[Otter]

and then do you put them to work?

Otter, that was just plain mean of your siblings to leave you alone with their kids, knowing that you were in over your head before you began. But I bet the kids will be telling "when Uncle Otter watched us" stories for a long time. ROFL

No shit! The last time I watched kids was my buddy who has the Animas River in his back yard. Little prick was fine for about 20 minutes until I stopped paying attention then wound up floating down the river on an inter tube.

Chased him about a 1/2 mile downstream. You guys take care of the kids, I'm not good at it.

But thank you for allowing me to vent. Oy! :toast:

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I'm sorry, but the title of this thread hit me all wrong.

[Earthling]

As a parent I couldn't help but chuckle...sorry Otter. A friend of mine went that vasectomy route and some years later met a honey that brought 2 little ones into the marriage that ensued. ;)

[Psyko Tek]

http://www.rechargeablestungun.com/Images/Big%20New%20Cattle%20Prod.jpg

If it's good enough for Lipizzaner stallions, it's good enough for kids.

so we left the bar one night a bit lit, ( common in 80's Nebraska)
some asshole was leaning on my dad;''s truck , he loved that truck maroon &8 GMC short bed,

he went to our drinkin buddies truck got a cattle pod and zapped the truck

swear that dipshit jumped 3 feet straight out into the road


it was amusing

[Phobia]

Yeah. Kids suck. But I got a son now. I'm good. I've cut my humping in half. Now I'm not tired every night.

[Thig Lyfe]

Some kids are cool. Other kids are mean.

[Dayze]

<thanks god for not having kids

[DaneMcCloud]

It's called raising your kids to not be destructive little assholes.

LMAO

[keg in kc]

That's why you put them in cages with a juicebox and some crackers and go watch TV.

[DaneMcCloud]

I'm nearly 48 and have a one year old. I also have a five year old.

I think it's awesome.

Being a parent isn't easy unless you act like a parent. Sleep schedules, play schedules and plenty of love is the answer.

[DaneMcCloud]

That's why you put them in cages with a juicebox and some crackers and go watch TV.

We have a 23' x 24' playroom that's been childproofed, along with a mesh gate so they can't escape, but also has a 47" LCD, soundbar and huge sofa for me and my wife.

It's all about planning and strategy.

:D

[T-post Tom]

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/Gb9riv44M-M" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Discuss Thrower]

The patenting thread on reddit pretty much tipped me in favor of never replicating.

Now if I can get over my irrational fear of sharp objects working near my but sack

[Earthling]

The patenting thread on reddit pretty much tipped me in favor of never replicating.

Now if I can get over my irrational fear of sharp objects working near my but sack

You should have that but sack looked at...Seriously...

[tomahawk kid]

My 63 year old brother and his wife just took custody, temporary, of a 4 month old. Im taking him wine this weekend. He said he had forgotten the joys of burping and diapers. Bless him for being a good person but man...i could not do it

At that age, it's just the crying part - at least there immobile.

Once they start to crawl - that's when the shit hits the fan.

[loochy]

Advice:

NEVER get outnumbered by kids

[kcxiv]

Without getting into too much detail I'm back in my home town in PA for family reasons. I got stuck watching 4 nieces and nephews between the ages of 5 and 12 while my brother and sisters were out taking care of some business.

I've dealt with everything between spilled drinks, broken glass, a momentary lost child while trying to make sure the others didn't get lost in the process to a 20 pound dumbbells getting rolled down the steps while I was trying to have 10 minutes of peace trying to take a dump which I thought was a child rolling down the steps from the sound of the noise.

Literally got up so fast I forgot to wipe my ass and didn't realize it till 20 minutes later.

I just want to say to all the parents of ChiefPlanet, God Bless You. If I had kids I'm willing to wager they would have about a 60:40 ratio of surviving till they became self sufficient. I don't know how you do it.

I'm getting drunk right now and having a vasectomy tomorrow. And no, I'm not kidding.

**** that! At least I'll be in the right state to finally watch a Chiefs game for once. Had to let that one out.


Lol i have to watch my 2 sisters kids 3 of them ages 3-4-5. I know what u mean about kids getting out of control. Once they get going its over nothing can contain them lol. I'm not one to yell at them unless they are fighting with one another. Its just when they get going it gets rough. After I just wanna lay down and relax

[UK_Chief]

I used to watch kids. Until I got caught...

[vailpass]

Advice:

NEVER get outnumbered by kids

No. Make sure they have other kids to play with. So much easier.

[tooge]

Any kid older than 7 should be able to be controlled and not be a hellyon. If not, your brother and sisters should do a better job of not raising psychos

[vailpass]

Any kid older than 7 should be able to be controlled and not be a hellyon. If not, your brother and sisters should do a better job of not raising psychos

IF they have siblings. That's the key.

[tecumseh]

It depends on the relationship you have with the kids. Or break out the nyquil and everyone gets a little nappy. My aunt used to give her kids nyquil whenever they flew from Chicago to Cali. Kids slept the whole way.

[tecumseh]

I love the 20 pound dumbbell thing. Total set up.

[Radar Chief]

ROFL I feel your pain.
I spent so many years afraid of being anchored down by a kid that I was 37 before Mrs. Radar and I decided it was time to have one or have none at all.
Now that we have a child and I see what I’ve been missing out on I wish we would have done it earlier, we’d have had at least one more.
They’re a handful but also a blessing. I know that sounds cheesy but I’m not enough of a wordsmith to properly relay the joy my son gives me, so there you have it.

[Radar Chief]

I'm nearly 48 and have a one year old. I also have a five year old.

I think it's awesome.

Being a parent isn't easy unless you act like a parent. Sleep schedules, play schedules and plenty of love is the answer.

Stevieray and his wife had a little girl last year after Steve turned 50. :eek:

[Frosty]

If I had kids I'm willing to wager they would have about a 60:40 ratio of surviving till they became self sufficient. I don't know how you do it.

Well, normally you don't get four all at the same time.

Also, it really is different with your own kids. Being around my nieces and nephews sets my teeth on edge but it wasn't that bad with my own (though I enjoyed them more from about 7 years old on).

[Frosty]

Stevieray and his wife had a little girl last year after Steve turned 50. :eek:

That's great for them but - **** that. :shake:

[MOhillbilly]

Stevieray and his wife had a little girl last year after Steve turned 50. :eek:

No further proof of his insanity is needed.

[DMAC]

No further proof of his insanity is needed.

No shit.

[Radar Chief]

That's great for them but - **** that. :shake:

Maybe if Steve could’ve talked her into more of that the baby wouldn’t be an issue. :hmmm:

[BlackHelicopters]

That's why you put them in cages with a juicebox and some crackers and go watch TV.

LMAO

[savchief]

I'll be 52 in 2 months, my first child, a son, is 6 days old. They keep you young right? Right? Crap, I'm so screwed.

[Frosty]

I'll be 52 in 2 months, my first child, a son, is 6 days old. They keep you young right? Right? Crap, I'm so screwed.

I couldn't even imagine.

I have some neighbors who's son knocked up the class skank right before HS graduation. She kept the kid (he wasn't in the picture) but descended into a life of drugs and child neglect so my neighbors had to step in and get custody and raised the child themselves for awhile (they were in their mid-40's at the time).

I admire them for it but I told both my boys to keep it in their pants, or at least wrapped, because I'm not raising a kid for them. I'm done with that.

[DaneMcCloud]

I'll be 52 in 2 months, my first child, a son, is 6 days old. They keep you young right? Right? Crap, I'm so screwed.

I've got a friend that's 53 who has a five year old and a one year old. I suppose it helps that his wife is 36 but he's loving it.

Enjoy!

It goes by way too fast.

[jerryforeverrice80]

sounds like a normal day in my household.

[Prison Bitch]

I've got a friend that's 53 who has a five year old and a one year old. I suppose it helps that his wife is 36 but he's loving it.
.


No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

[DaneMcCloud]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

Good grief, you're a miserable human being.

[Radar Chief]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

You were raised in solitary confinement by robots weren’t you?

[Frosty]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

I'll have to admit that I have always been uncomfortable around little kids, even my own. However, this is over the top,

[Prison Bitch]

Good grief, you're a miserable human being.

But honest.

[Fish]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

Your parenting ideas are even more hilarious than your political ones....

You'd make a nice case study.

[Prison Bitch]

I'll have to admit that I have always been uncomfortable around little kids, even my own. However, this is over the top,

What part? I mean, I've never seen any daycare worker or elementary school teacher or Sunday school helper or whatever who wasn't a woman. Not one. Maybe my kids just never encountered them just as I didn't as a child. On the flip I've yet to see a female construction worker, roofer, deck builder, or car repair person. It's so weird you'd think they'd be everywhere.

[ModSocks]

What part? I mean, I've never seen any daycare worker or elementary school teacher or Sunday school helper or whatever who wasn't a woman. Not one. Maybe my kids just never encountered them just as I didn't as a child. On the flip I've yet to see a female construction worker, roofer, deck builder, or car repair person. It's so weird you'd think they'd be everywhere.

I think you need to get out more.

I agree with Frosty though, im not a natural with kids either. I'm not really good at fake socializing though either.

Faking amusement/conversation for someone else has never been my strong suit, so when i have to engage in a conversation with a 5 year old that isn't mine....it's a little rough for me to say the least. I try though. I was an only child that was never around kids younger than myself, so at least i have somewhat of an excuse lol.

[Frosty]

Faking amusement/conversation for someone else has never been my strong suit, so when i have to engage in a conversation with a 5 year old that isn't mine....it's a little rough for me to say the least. I try though. I was an only child that was never around kids younger than myself, so at least i have somewhat of an excuse lol.

Very much this. All of my kids' friends were scared of me because I didn't talk when they were around. LMAO

[Prison Bitch]

I think you need to get out more.

I agree with Frosty though, im not a natural with kids either. I'm not really good at fake socializing though either.

Faking amusement/conversation for someone else has never been my strong suit, so when i have to engage in a conversation with a 5 year old that isn't mine....it's a little rough for me to say the least. I try though. I was an only child that was never around kids younger than myself, so at least i have somewhat of an excuse lol.

So I need to get out more. To meet folks like you who basically agreed with my general premise anyway. Sweet.

[Halfcan]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.

You must not have kids. Nothing beats watching them grow up, tucking them in and rocking them to sleep. Just the fact that you say a guy has to be a perv to show their kids affection says you are deeply disturbed and have no clue what it takes to be a Real Father. :doh!:

[ModSocks]

So I need to get out more. To meet folks like you who basically agreed with my general premise anyway. Sweet.

I said you need to get out more because there are plenty of women in construction and plenty of men teaching grade skill. My son's first teacher was a male.

[Bugeater]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.
Not sure what you mean by this. Other people's kids...yeah...that is a bit weird. But I did enjoy spending time with my son before he became a creepy teenager.

[stevieray]

No further proof of his insanity is needed.



well...bye!

[Prison Bitch]

Not sure what you mean by this. Other people's kids...yeah...that is a bit weird. But I did enjoy spending time with my son before he became a creepy teenager.

I bet your wife spent (and ejoyed spending) way more time with the infants than you did. But I'm sure there are exceptions to every rule. I haven't yet encountered a group of men with their baby strollers eating lunch together at Panera but when I do I'll report back to this board.

[DaneMcCloud]

I bet your wife spent (and ejoyed spending) way more time with the infants than you did. But I'm sure there are exceptions to every rule. I haven't yet encountered a group of men with their baby strollers eating lunch together at Panera but when I do I'll report back to this board.

You've just described a typical Saturday in Los Angeles except instead of a Panera's, it would the beach, Lake Hollywood, etc.

There's a big difference being a first or second time Dad in your mid-to-late 40's than in your 20's.

[Bugeater]

I bet your wife spent (and ejoyed spending) way more time with the infants than you did. But I'm sure there are exceptions to every rule. I haven't yet encountered a group of men with their baby strollers eating lunch together at Panera but when I do I'll report back to this board.
Oh, we're talking about infants? Nah, can't say much of that was what I would call enjoyable. Toddler up through elementary school was the most fun for me.

[raybec 4]

I'll be 52 in 2 months, my first child, a son, is 6 days old. They keep you young right? Right? Crap, I'm so screwed.

You're going to be fucking 70 when that kid graduates from High School, Jesus man I am not nearly as adventurous as you are.

[MOhillbilly]

You guys are gettin trolled hard.

[Frosty]

Not sure what you mean by this. Other people's kids...yeah...that is a bit weird. But I did enjoy spending time with my son before he became a creepy teenager.


Teen years were/are the most fun for me, though my youngest is 16 so still has time to turn into a creepy teenager.

[Prison Bitch]

Oh, we're talking about infants? Nah, can't say much of that was what I would call enjoyable. Toddler up through elementary school was the most fun for me.

Yep. No doubt. (Well for us at least, some of the super-dads loved infancy. They're better humans however so that is to be expected)

[Bugeater]

Teen years were/are the most fun for me, though my youngest is 16 so still has time to turn into a creepy teenager.
I was actually looking forward to it, but sometime when he was in middle school our relationship turned into one giant conflict that still hasn't ended. I hardly even see or talk to him any more even though he still lives in my damn house.

[Frosty]

I was actually looking forward to it, but sometime when he was in middle school our relationship turned into one giant conflict that still hasn't ended. I hardly even see or talk to him any more even though he still lives in my damn house.

That's too bad.

My oldest went through his rebellious stage when he was 8 (no lie). He was a lot of fun to be around from about 12 on, though he could still be a pain in the butt, as any kid will. He's off to college now and I miss him. :(

I think I lucked out with both of my boys.

[stevieray]

No he's not. He's just telling you that so you won't think less of him. He thinks that by lying about how wonderful little children are, you'll think he's a better person.


Men aren't wired to love and hug and cuddle small children or live in their imaginations or rock them to sleep. Women are. Men are built to explore and work and create things in the real world. Any man who pretends he loves spending time with little kids should immediately raise suspicion he's either lying, or a perv.
three guesses where I am...

[stevieray]

You guys are gettin trolled hard.you got me..:clap:

[TEX]

I REFUSE to have kids and to ever watch them. I respect those who do it, but its NOT for me.