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Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:09 PM
I feel like this would be a great opportunity to reach out and be friends with one of you.

The mission for this thread is simple: I am going to make a friend. One of you will be my friend.

I will angle for your affection, pretend like we have something in common, and we'll talk like friends talk. Eventually, you will like me.

Go.

TimBone
07-28-2014, 05:09 PM
No.

The Franchise
07-28-2014, 05:10 PM
Yes

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:11 PM
No.

C'mon. I've got toy cars.

Toy cars!

Bufkin
07-28-2014, 05:11 PM
Starting off, what type of information are you looking for?

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:11 PM
Yes

Now that's the kind of optimism I like in a potential friend.

What are your hopes? Your dreams? Your desires?

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:11 PM
Starting off, what type of information are you looking for?

Let's go with names for potential children.

If you had a boy tomorrow, what would you name him.

Bufkin
07-28-2014, 05:12 PM
Let's go with names for potential children.

If you had a boy tomorrow, what would you name him.
Martin, after my favorite journalist Martin Bashir.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:15 PM
Martin, after my favorite journalist Martin Bashir.

Interesting! I watch him on MSNBC from time to time.

I have so many favorite journalists. Nobody touches Tim Russert, for my money, but Christina Amanpour comes close.

Edit: Or Peter Bergen. Or Jeffery Toobin. Or Tom Ricks.

TimBone
07-28-2014, 05:16 PM
C'mon. I've got toy cars.

Toy cars!

Hot wheels?

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-28-2014, 05:16 PM
I've got boar semen for sale. Let's be friends !

Zebedee DuBois
07-28-2014, 05:17 PM
I kind of like you already, but in the laziest, most not-making-an-effort way possible. If conversation is required, that may be enough to push the relationship to 'annoyance' status.

Can't we just leave it at this level.

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:17 PM
Go fuck a goat.

Bufkin
07-28-2014, 05:17 PM
Marry, kill, fuck

Sarah Palin, Anderson Cooper, Nancy Grace.

BillSelfsTrophycase
07-28-2014, 05:19 PM
We are all friends here...And we will all endure another disappointing Chiefs season


Once more unto the breach, dear friends

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 05:22 PM
I admire the initiative of this thread. I often think that I should make more of an effort to cultivate friends, but then I realize that I don't really care that much and would rather sit down and read a good magazine article by myself.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:23 PM
Hot wheels?

Is there any other kind?

We're done. You're not going to be my friend.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:23 PM
I've got boar semen for sale. Let's be friends !

Uhhhhhhherrrmmmmmm.... Do you have any other interests.

Easy 6
07-28-2014, 05:23 PM
No.

.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:24 PM
I kind of like you already, but in the laziest, most not-making-an-effort way possible. If conversation is required, that may be enough to push the relationship to 'annoyance' status.

Can't we just leave it at this level.

I'm ready to take it to the next level. My body is ready. Yours could be too.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:24 PM
Go **** a goat.

That's not a nice thing to say.

We'll never be friends with that kind of attitude.

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-28-2014, 05:25 PM
Uhhhhhhherrrmmmmmm.... Do you have any other interests.

Yep . I like to shoot dogs running across the pasture. the 204 is a sweet rifle .
I even got night vision for it.

Titty Meat
07-28-2014, 05:25 PM
Friend zoned

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:25 PM
Marry, kill, ****

Sarah Palin, Anderson Cooper, Nancy Grace.

C'mon, man. You know me.

Marry Cooper.
Kill Grace.
Palin can slob on the knob.

LoneWolf
07-28-2014, 05:25 PM
C'mon. I've got toy cars.

Toy cars!

You own a Subaru? Neat!

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:25 PM
I admire the initiative of this thread. I often think that I should make more of an effort to cultivate friends, but then I realize that I don't really care that much and would rather sit down and read a good magazine article by myself.

We're already friends. Get out of here.

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
I admire the initiative of this thread. I often think that I should make more of an effort to cultivate friends, but then I realize that I don't really care that much and would rather sit down and read a good magazine article by myself.

we should get together some time and read.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
.

You son of a bitch.

YOU SON OF A BITCH.

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
That's not a nice thing to say.

We'll never be friends with that kind of attitude.


How do you know that he's not a shepherd from the hills of Armenia? That's probably a very nice and welcoming offer from an Armenian shepherd.

TimBone
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
Is there any other kind?

We're done. You're not going to be my friend.

http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/07/29/epe9a7yb.jpg

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
Yep . I like to shoot dogs running across the pasture. the 204 is a sweet rifle .
I even got night vision for it.

Let's just be pen pals.

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
We're already friends. Get out of here.

Thank god. I'm out of here.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:26 PM
Friend zoned

Man hug?

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 05:27 PM
we should get together some time and read.


I'll call you.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:27 PM
we should get together some time and read.

I'll call you.

NOBODY ELSE IS ALLOWED TO MAKE FRIENDS WHILE I'M TRYING TO MAKE FRIENDS.

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:28 PM
That's not a nice thing to say.

We'll never be friends with that kind of attitude.

Perhaps not, but there will be some goats that will be thrilled.

Bwana
07-28-2014, 05:29 PM
I like guns, lots of guns.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:29 PM
How do you know that he's not a shepherd from the hills of Armenia? That's probably a very nice and welcoming offer from an Armenian shepherd.

I hadn't considered that.

I'm not very culturally aware. I'll have to change that if I want to make a friend.

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:30 PM
Rain Man and I almost became friends once. I'm not sure what happened but I'm positive it was mutual.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:30 PM
Perhaps not, but there will be some goats that will be thrilled.

I'm trying to make a human friend, Donger.

A human friend.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:30 PM
I like guns, lots of guns.

Interesting!

How do you feel about fro-yo?

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-28-2014, 05:31 PM
I like guns, lots of guns.

I wanna be friends with Bwana !

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:31 PM
I'm trying to make a human friend, Donger.

A human friend.

Oh. Well, it's your fault that you didn't specify species.

Bwana
07-28-2014, 05:33 PM
Interesting!

How do you feel about fro-yo?

Never had it.

Bwana
07-28-2014, 05:34 PM
I wanna be friends with Bwana !

I'll shake your hand but under the circumstances, I need to see you wash them first, boar wrangler. :D

Raiderhader
07-28-2014, 05:35 PM
I'll need you to switch to an American flag in your avatar before I could consider.

Kyle DeLexus
07-28-2014, 05:37 PM
Giant Douche or Turd Sandwich?

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 05:37 PM
Rain Man and I almost became friends once. I'm not sure what happened but I'm positive it was mutual.


I remember that. It seemed imminent, but then one of us lost our goat or something.

RealSNR
07-28-2014, 05:37 PM
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/2prGdsc0RF8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-28-2014, 05:39 PM
I'll need you to switch to an American flag in your avatar before I could consider.


Good point !

What's up with that ?

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:39 PM
Oh. Well, it's your fault that you didn't specify species.

I accept my shortcomings and will take your feedback as constructive criticism.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:39 PM
I wanna be friends with Bwana !

I'll shake your hand but under the circumstances, I need to see you wash them first, boar wrangler. :D

Everybody needs to put Hog Farmer on ignore. He is trying to steal you from me.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:39 PM
Never had it.

Well? Lessgo!

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:40 PM
I'll need you to switch to an American flag in your avatar before I could consider.

Interesting proposition.

Very interesting.

BigRedChief
07-28-2014, 05:40 PM
I feel like this would be a great opportunity to reach out and be friends with one of you.

The mission for this thread is simple: I am going to make a friend. One of you will be my friend.

I will angle for your affection, pretend like we have something in common, and we'll talk like friends talk. Eventually, you will like me.

Go.
:hmmm:
http://www.thecheapplace.com/image/cache/data/Product-images/ivamis/P1014-Fuck-you-I-have-enough-friends-Patch-950x675.jpg

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:40 PM
Giant Douche or Turd Sandwich?

Giant Douche.

Douching isn't so bad if you have to do it.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 05:42 PM
I have just made a friend.

Hog Farmer has sent me a friend request, which I politely obliged.

We are now friends. This thread has fulfilled its purpose. It may now be allowed to drop deep into the bowels of this forum and die with dignity.

RealSNR
07-28-2014, 05:45 PM
I have just made a friend.

Hog Farmer has sent me a friend request, which I politely obliged.

We are now friends. This thread has fulfilled its purpose. It may now be allowed to drop deep into the bowels of this forum and die with dignity.

Hope you like talking about Johnny Manziel.

Otherwise it will never work.

cmh6476
07-28-2014, 05:45 PM
I hope no chiefs impact players get hurt this year. I dream our defense will be tops in the league. I desire a Chiefs super bowl victory. Can we be friends?

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:48 PM
I have just made a friend.

Hog Farmer has sent me a friend request, which I politely obliged.

We are now friends. This thread has fulfilled its purpose. It may now be allowed to drop deep into the bowels of this forum and die with dignity.

WTF is a "friend request"?

Buzz
07-28-2014, 05:50 PM
I hope no chiefs impact players get hurt this year. I dream our defense will be tops in the league. I desire a Chiefs super bowl victory. Can we be friends?


looks like you could use some friends.

DaFace
07-28-2014, 05:52 PM
That seems unlikely.

LoneWolf
07-28-2014, 05:54 PM
WTF is a "friend request"?

Check your profile page. :D

Titty Meat
07-28-2014, 05:54 PM
Man hug?

Mouth hug

Buzz
07-28-2014, 05:55 PM
Oh, and with friends like you who needs an enema? :doh!:

Donger
07-28-2014, 05:55 PM
Check your profile page. :D

Oh right.

I rejected your request.

Bwana
07-28-2014, 05:56 PM
Mouth hug

**Runs off to check for Jim Jones mult.** :eek:

SuperChief
07-28-2014, 05:58 PM
Let's go with names for potential children.

If you had a boy tomorrow, what would you name him.

Dean. It's my father's middle name, and my future son's name. Next question.

LoneWolf
07-28-2014, 06:04 PM
Oh right.

I rejected your request.

Please excuse me while I go hang myself in a closet.

Donger
07-28-2014, 06:05 PM
Please excuse me while I go hang myself in a closet.

I'll hang around until you're done.

How does one even send a "friend request"?

Donger
07-28-2014, 06:06 PM
Oh! I think I just figured it out!

LoneWolf
07-28-2014, 06:08 PM
I'll hang around until you're done.

How does one even send a "friend request"?

Go to the persons public profile and under the friends tab click on "send friend request". Then be prepared to have your heart ripped out when they reject your request.

Simply Red
07-28-2014, 06:10 PM
I have just made a friend.

Hog Farmer has sent me a friend request, which I politely obliged.

We are now friends. This thread has fulfilled its purpose. It may now be allowed to drop deep into the bowels of this forum and die with dignity.

Fuck you and Hit Me with a Club!!!

TimBone
07-28-2014, 06:10 PM
I only want to be friends with Simply Red.

Deberg_1990
07-28-2014, 06:12 PM
I feel like this would be a great opportunity to reach out and be friends with one of you.

The mission for this thread is simple: I am going to make a friend. One of you will be my friend.

I will angle for your affection, pretend like we have something in common, and we'll talk like friends talk. Eventually, you will like me.

Go.

A/S/L ?

Pic?

Simply Red
07-28-2014, 06:12 PM
You are a sweet, sweet man.

Rudy tossed tigger's salad
07-28-2014, 06:13 PM
Get a dog

Donger
07-28-2014, 06:18 PM
Go to the persons public profile and under the friends tab click on "send friend request". Then be prepared to have your heart ripped out when they reject your request.

Thanks. Did I do it correctly?

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 06:24 PM
I would like to remind everyone that this thread has fulfilled its purpose, and now can be either closed or ignored.

Posting in this thread is now excessive and unnecessary now that I have a friend. Please stop.

SeeingRed
07-28-2014, 06:30 PM
yay...lets all be friends! =D

Big Smoke
07-28-2014, 07:05 PM
I'm so confused. :(

Buzz
07-28-2014, 07:10 PM
I'm so confused. :(


so is SeeingRed.

SeeingRed
07-28-2014, 07:32 PM
so is SeeingRed.

:cuss:

Simply Red
07-28-2014, 07:41 PM
I would like to remind everyone that this thread has fulfilled its purpose, and now can be either closed or ignored.

Posting in this thread is now excessive and unnecessary now that I have a friend. Please stop.

u Dick.

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 07:46 PM
I would like to remind everyone that this thread has fulfilled its purpose, and now can be either closed or ignored.

Posting in this thread is now excessive and unnecessary now that I have a friend. Please stop.

It's quite possible that you've grown apart. When was the last time you heard from him?

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 07:57 PM
It's quite possible that you've grown apart. When was the last time you heard from him?

Stop sowing the seeds of discontent.

For once in my miserable existence on CP, a thread I've started has reached its intended outcome, and someone on CP can't help but try to rip it apart.

I expected it. But I didn't expect it to be you, Rain Man. I didn't expect it to be you.

Raiderhader
07-28-2014, 08:00 PM
Stop sowing the seeds of discontent.

For once in my miserable existence on CP, a thread I've started has reached its intended outcome, and someone on CP can't help but try to rip it apart.

I expected it. But I didn't expect it to be you, Rain Man. I didn't expect it to be you.

Never turn your back on Rain Man.




















Or Hog Farmer for that matter.

Direckshun
07-28-2014, 08:05 PM
ROFL

58-4ever
07-28-2014, 08:05 PM
if you're still taking applications, I will be your friend.

58-4ever
07-28-2014, 08:06 PM
if you're still taking applications, I will be your friend.

Q you idiot

Buzz
07-28-2014, 08:07 PM
Stop sowing the seeds of discontent.

For once in my miserable existence on CP, a thread I've started has reached its intended outcome, and someone on CP can't help but try to rip it apart.

I expected it. But I didn't expect it to be you, Rain Man. I didn't expect it to be you.


you might need moor friends?

Mr. Flopnuts
07-28-2014, 08:24 PM
you might need moor friends?

Yeah, the one he has is a real boar! groan...

loochy
07-28-2014, 08:47 PM
Martin, after my favorite journalist Martin Bashir.

http://rindastartrekds9.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/dr_julian_bashir_by_pakpolaris-d37vcd4.jpg

Eleazar
07-28-2014, 09:24 PM
Get a dog. Dogs > people

Simply Red
07-28-2014, 09:35 PM
Yeah, the one he has is a real boar! groan...

If you're attending a game this season - I'd like to meet up. Out of the blue I guess. but......???

Rain Man
07-28-2014, 09:42 PM
Stop sowing the seeds of discontent.

For once in my miserable existence on CP, a thread I've started has reached its intended outcome, and someone on CP can't help but try to rip it apart.

I expected it. But I didn't expect it to be you, Rain Man. I didn't expect it to be you.

Never turn your back on Rain Man.




People have historically underestimated my viciousness around here. I'm glad to see that I'm finally getting some recognition.

Iowanian
07-28-2014, 09:53 PM
Quite a few of these guys should be easy enough for you to become friends and they have a distinct formula to accomplish the task.

Basically all you have to do is try to date any of the regular date-beggars. Text them a few times, maybe exchange a phone call and when they go in for the kiss, turn your cheek and tell them what the other girls do..."we'll be great friends, I'll call you".

Lex Luthor
07-28-2014, 09:57 PM
I feel like this would be a great opportunity to reach out and be friends with one of you.

The mission for this thread is simple: I am going to make a friend. One of you will be my friend.

I will angle for your affection, pretend like we have something in common, and we'll talk like friends talk. Eventually, you will like me.

Go.

No thanks. I already have a gay friend.

Hammock Parties
07-28-2014, 10:04 PM
WE WERE FACEBOOK FRIENDS

YOU UNFRIENDED ME

YOU WANT A FRIEND?

TRY NOT ERASING THE ONES YOU HAVE YOU HORRIBLE SUBHUMAN MONSTER

A POX ON YOUR FAMILY

RealSNR
07-28-2014, 10:25 PM
WE WERE FACEBOOK FRIENDS

YOU UNFRIENDED ME

YOU WANT A FRIEND?

TRY NOT ERASING THE ONES YOU HAVE YOU HORRIBLE SUBHUMAN MONSTER

A POX ON YOUR FAMILY

What the FUCK, Direckshun?!

Give me one good reason why I shouldn't drive over to Springfield right now and slap you in the face.

Saccopoo
07-28-2014, 11:12 PM
I remember dragging out one of my friends from the Hawk in a drunken, unconscious stupor and laying him on an ant hill that was near the sidewalk on the other side of the street from the bar.

That was funny.

Titty Meat
07-28-2014, 11:14 PM
I remember dragging out one of my friends from the Hawk in a drunken, unconscious stupor and laying him on an ant hill that was near the sidewalk on the other side of the street from the bar.

That was funny.

You seem like the type who would go to The Hawk

ClevelandBronco
07-28-2014, 11:21 PM
Ignore thread.

Gonzo
07-29-2014, 12:01 AM
Friends are overrated. Every time I get one that I think I'll have for life, they end up being giant fucking douches.
However, guns are nice. Carry one and people usually fall in line.

Saccopoo
07-29-2014, 12:15 AM
You seem like the type who would go to The Hawk

Thanks.

keg in kc
07-29-2014, 12:54 AM
This is just creepy.

Hog's Gone Fishin
07-29-2014, 07:11 AM
Hope you like talking about Johnny Manziel.

Otherwise it will never work.

No.No !

I have plans to educate him thoroughly on boar jerking techniques first , then we're gonna talk about johnny Manziel.

Raiderhader
07-29-2014, 07:27 AM
People have historically underestimated my viciousness around here. I'm glad to see that I'm finally getting some recognition.
I've never underestimated you. In fact I've always assumed that all of your polls and games/simulations were just meant to distract us from a much more nefarious purpose.

Raiderhader
07-29-2014, 07:29 AM
No.No !

I have plans to educate him thoroughly on boar jerking techniques first , then we're gonna talk about johnny Manziel.
For some reason I suspect there is going to be a fair amount of overlap on these two subjects.

luv
07-29-2014, 07:34 AM
Friends? What are those?

tooge
07-29-2014, 07:56 AM
I've got enough good friends. Everyone else can fuck off. Not looking for a new friend