Clays theme song

[Coochie liquor]

As the self proclaimed Weird Al of CP, I create parodies of popular songs to share with my favorite BB and all it's viewers. It's no secret I dislike Ghey Clay, like most on here. So I worked up a song just for him. Should be considered his theme song, and will always be in my mind.
So, you've gotta remember that female anthem from the late 90s right? You know the one.... It's titled Bitch. What a classic that was huh?? Pretty much fits him title wise.... But I had to rework it for everybody's favorite annoying POS.
And of course the lyrics are NSFW.

Here's a link to the song so you can listen and sing along
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_ivt_N2Zcts

I really dislike Clay, he's as annoying as he is ghey. And when he takes off his diaper there's no penis underneath, just some lips with no teeth.
Yesterday he cried like a big baby Alex Smith he got re-signed, Clay blew up on CP and looked just like a child who never got his ass beat, his mommy gave him treats.

He's a bitch mother fucker, wish his dad had wore a rubber when he banged his mom that day, then there'd be no Clay
For Geno on his knees, he's even begging please because he swears Geno is the only way.
He is not a Chiefs fan, and as far as I'm concerned he isn't even a man, He's just a unhappy little virgin who takes his anger to extremes, and something tells me he has to sit down when he pees.
Clays a bitch, like no other, hope his folks don't make another, boy who cries like a baby when he doesn't get his way, hes a douche, hates the Chiefs, he's got piss stains on his sheets, I wish him ebolaids every single day.
He's a bitch who's pussy bleeds, he'll never get an std because to get one you would first have to get laid....

[Eleazar]

http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/2012/01/what.gif

[Rudy tossed tigger's salad]

addiction is hard

[Coochie liquor]

addiction is hard

Don't worry, keep your head up. You can overcome you addiction. I have faith in you (not really)

[bigjosh]

http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/09/15/te9ydymy.jpg

[Sandy Vagina]

He is pathetic and annoying at times.. but don't hate him.. just pity him. He seems like a lonely head-case, and his character is that of a quitting, disgruntled child.

You just have to feel sorry for people like that.. and hope that one day, they will seek help.

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

Damn, Cooch.

You gonna take that shit, GoChiefs?

Dinny

[BigCatDaddy]

It appears someone stayed up all night on a meth binge.

[Coochie liquor]

It appears someone stayed up all night on a meth binge.

If only.... Sounds like a party!! Although I just burn trees, and drink alcohol. And I can literally parody a song in 10 min or less.

[Simply Red]

He wants to be mecca SOOO bad.

[TLO]

Everytime someone makes a thread about Clay, he pees a little.

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

SR, you are the top 5 planeteers that I would most like to meet. The next in line is #6.

You seem to be a nice, all-around swell interesting cat. (no homo)

Open invitation to a big lunch smokeout stands. Hopefully you can include a Springtown sojourn into a Chiefs game experience/road trip. I hope you don't like ketchup on anything, that kind of thing is generally not received too well around here. In your case, however, exceptions will be made.

Dinny

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

He's in your head, Fred.

[Sandy Vagina]

He's in your head, Fred.

and the easy money is, he's in YOUR bed.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

and the easy money is, he's in YOUR bed.

Pics or did not happen.

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

and the easy money is, he's in YOUR bed.

Damn, Cheeks.

You gonna take that shit, ROR?

Dinny

edit: too slow

[Pablo]

This is awful. Just brutally bad. Just do this discreetly and PM him your dick pics or something.

[loochy]

my favorite animal is carrot.

[New World Order]

Coochie, you take this internet thing too seriously.

[Coochie liquor]

This is awful. Just brutally bad. Just do this discreetly and PM him your dick pics or something.

Do you have any precious works of art on display here, peanut?

[Coochie liquor]

Coochie, you take this internet thing too seriously.

It's a parody, nothing serious about it. Just a stupid talent(?) of mine.

[Ming the Merciless]

So you dislike clay and you took the time to write a song for him and repeated a million times what a homo he is...

By going through your gay cd collection until you found literally the most gay song and playing it a hundred times and then adapting your lyrics to fit that song...

Yah dude Clay is "so gay" it hurts....

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

my favorite animal is carrot.

LMAO

[Coochie liquor]

So you dislike clay and you took the time to write a song for him and repeated a million times what a homo he is...

By going through your gay cd collection until you found literally the most gay song and playing it a hundred times and then adapting your lyrics to fit that song...

Yah dude Clay is "so gay" it hurts....

A good woman will stick up for her man, so I commend you! You 2 seem to see eye to eye on a lot oF subjects, and that says a lot about you! But that's a discussion for another thread! Now I'm sure it would take a mortal like yourself 100 listens to accomplish something of the magnitude as this. But I am god like. I can throw one of these together faster than it takes you to premature ejaculate (don't worry she didn't tell me anything) and apparently your reading comprehension is as off as the odor that surrounds you... I think I only refered to him being ghey once!

[New World Order]

my favorite animal is carrot.


haha

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

A good woman will stick up for her man, so I commend you! You 2 seem to see eye to eye on a lot oF subjects, and that says a lot about you! But that's a discussion for another thread! Now I'm sure it would take a mortal like yourself 100 listens to accomplish something of the magnitude as this. But I am god like. I can throw one of these together faster than it takes you to premature ejaculate (don't worry she didn't tell me anything) and apparently your reading comprehension is as off as the odor that surrounds you... I think I only refered to him being ghey once!

That's right, boo; stand by your Alex. Be strong.

[Otter]

And one more time...

You BigRedChief and Kotter should become roommates.

[loochy]

And one more time...

You BigRedChief and Kotter should become roommates.

ah, it still makes me lol

[Eleazar]

It's a parody, nothing serious about it. Just a stupid talent(?) of mine.

I wouldn't go that far.

[Coochie liquor]

I wouldn't go that far.

How far would you go?? Asking for a friend...

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

And one more time...

You BigRedChief and Kotter should become roommates.

Damn, Otter.

You gonna take that shit, GoChiefs?

Dinny

(waaaaaaiiiit...... am I missing something here?)

[Coochie liquor]

And one more time...

You BigRedChief and Kotter should become roommates.

That sounds great and all..... But you know I'm staying with your mom right now, and we like to have us some ALONE time. So I'm gonna veto this one. Thanks for the inquiry though, and keep up the good work!!:shake:

[Hammock Parties]

With the Chiefs season over, attention now shifts to me. I love it!

[Coochie liquor]

With the Chiefs season over, attention now shifts to me. I love it!

Shine bright big star!! This is your big shot!!:thumb:

[TimBone]

http://img.tapatalk.com/d/14/09/16/ydeduvur.jpg

[listopencil]

Blah blah blah...pro life...blah blah blah...this thread's an abortion...blah blah blah...ghey.


It's a talent I have.

[BlackHelicopters]

Meth is a helluva drug.

[Ming the Merciless]

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0la7uFrcZVa <--- LOL



I really dislike Clay, he's as annoying as he is ghey. And when he takes off his diaper there's no penis underneath, just some lips with no teeth.
Yesterday he cried like a big baby Alex Smith he got re-signed, Clay blew up on CP and looked just like a child who never got his ass beat, his mommy gave him treats.
He's a bitch mother ****er, wish his dad had wore a rubber when he banged his mom that day, then there'd be no Clay
For Geno on his knees, he's even begging please because he swears Geno is the only way.
He is not a Chiefs fan, and as far as I'm concerned he isn't even a man, He's just a unhappy little virgin who takes his anger to extremes, and something tells me he has to sit down when he pees.
Clays a bitch, like no other, hope his folks don't make another, boy who cries like a baby when he doesn't get his way, hes a douche, hates the Chiefs, he's got piss stains on his sheets, I wish him ebolaids every single day.
He's a bitch who's pussy bleeds, he'll never get an std because to get one you would first have to get laid....

[Hammock Parties]

FUCK YES LMAO

[Coochie liquor]

Blah blah blah...pro life...blah blah blah...this thread's an abortion...blah blah blah...ghey.


I have no talent..

FYP

[Coochie liquor]

I love my peeps!!

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

I don't know, Cooch. I don't believe this is your best offering, I think you got better than this in you.

I think it was a little light on clever witticism and heavy on the venom. I expect a little more of you, quite frankly.

Perhaps your next offering will begin with a less obscure song to re-word. I still think Dave Mason "Let It Go, Let It Flow" has some potential, but might be a little TOO classic in the Classic rock genre for the youngsters.

Anyway, chin up, old chap, you are in the right forest, you just have yet to find the proper tree.

Dinny

[Simplicity]

I think Ray Rice is a horrible human being.

[Eleazar]

I'm gonna have to change my username so people don't confuse me with Coochie

[Coochie liquor]

I'm gonna have to change my username so people don't confuse me with Coochie

Great, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. Kinda like having Katy Perry, and Kittie Purrie, just to close. I'm not sharing my spotlight!!

[Eleazar]

Great, I've been meaning to talk to you about that. Kinda like having Katy Perry, and Kittie Purrie, just to close. I'm not sharing my spotlight!!

Why should I change, though? I was here first. Why don't you send a PM to Bob Dole so he can settle this.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

A white guy in his 40's. That's who's doing this. :facepalm:

[SAUTO]

I don't know, Cooch. I don't believe this is your best offering, I think you got better than this in you.

I think it was a little light on clever witticism and heavy on the venom. I expect a little more of you, quite frankly.

Perhaps your next offering will begin with a less obscure song to re-word. I still think Dave Mason "Let It Go, Let It Flow" has some potential, but might be a little TOO classic in the Classic rock genre for the youngsters.

Anyway, chin up, old chap, you are in the right forest, you just have yet to find the proper tree.

DinnyLMAO

[SAUTO]

A white guy in his 40's. That's who's doing this. :facepalm:

Really? LMAO

[Coochie liquor]

Why should I change, though? I was here first. Why don't you send a PM to Bob Dole so he can settle this.

Sorry I'm coochie liquor, I change for no one! Do you think Bono changed his name when he found out he shared his name with someone who had it longer (sonny bono) fuck no he didn't. He arranged a little "accident" and the rest is history . So ..... Be careful!!

[Hammock Parties]

I always thought this was my theme song:

<iframe width="480" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/tx1mryKqvT8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Really? LMAO

Absolutely.

[Eleazar]

I normally would like to participate in a good CP dogpile but this one is not especially interesting.

[Coochie liquor]

Really? LMAO

Yep!! Just sharing little pieces of me with you guys!! Yeah I'm not your typical 40 year old! Way fucking cooler!! Don't hate the player, hate the game!!

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

I always thought this was my theme song:

<iframe width="480" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/tx1mryKqvT8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Begging the Count's pardon, but you will never be a man. You will forever be a pre-pubescent girl trapped in a fat dork's body.

Sucks to be you.

Dinny

[Eleazar]

Yep!! Just sharing little pieces of me with you guys!! Yeah I'm not your typical 40 year old! Way ****ing cooler!! Don't hate the player, hate the game!!

Some moderator is a son of a bitch. :LOL:

[Hammock Parties]

Begging the Count's pardon, but you will never be a man. You will forever be a pre-pubescent girl trapped in a fat dork's body.

Sucks to be you.

Dinny

Your obsession with me is entertaining. Keep it up. LMAO

[GoChargers]

He's just a unhappy little virgin who takes his anger to extremes

Nothing says "controlled emotion" or "having a lot of sex" quite like writing a song about another poster on a message board.

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Some moderator is a son of a bitch. :LOL:

You love to hate me. ;)

[Eleazar]

You love to hate me. ;)

That's not so bad. I just hate most people.

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

Your obsession with me is entertaining. Keep it up. LMAO

Maverick is on a break. Somebody has to do it.

Tapout acknowledged.

Dinny

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

You love to hate me. ;)

ROFLROFLROFLROFLROFL

Dinny

[Mr. Flopnuts]

That's not so bad. I just hate most people.

Hope and Change.

[Buzz]

https://sp1.yimg.com/ib/th?id=HN.607986727372129009&pid=15.1&P=0

[Hammock Parties]

dude don't post pics of my gf

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

Clay Is Legend.

[Eleazar]

Hope and Change.

Damnit I am a curmudgeon. I am just doing my job

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Damnit I am a curmudgeon. I am just doing my job

I think we ran the wannabe 40 something white rapper off. We're doing something right.

[Buzz]

dude don't post pics of my gf

That's a man!

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Damnit I am a curmudgeon. I am just doing my job

Oh, and one other thing. You seem nice!

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

Clay Is Legend.

Without him, ChiefsPlanet is a 5 posts per day ghost town.

I would be stunned if AC doesn't pay Clay to do his stuff.

This is all just Clay's Facebook page if you eliminate the Kotter mults.

Simply Red can save us, but I don't think he cares.

Dinny

[Hammock Parties]

That's a man!

it's just the hair

[Coochie liquor]

And in all honesty I don't hate or really even dislike Clay. He is annoying but aren't we all? I had a feeling he would take it in stride.
And I don't come here and claim my massive football knowledge, and tell you who we shoulda picked, or what we shoulda did, because that's not me. My time is better spent rewriting cheesy songs for you entertainment or lack there of!

[Coochie liquor]

I think we ran the wannabe 40 something white rapper off. We're doing something right.

Wanna be rapper? Really? I'm much more talented than a rapper. Ain't no running me off, I'm like the herp. I'm here til you're not!

[Coochie liquor]

Nothing says "controlled emotion" or "having a lot of sex" quite like writing a song about another poster on a message board.

Nothing says no Super Bowl wins like Go Chargers. You can come back to the big boy table when your team wins a SB. Til then.... Shut it!

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

https://sp1.yimg.com/ib/th?id=HN.607986727372129009&pid=15.1&P=0

That is NOT a chick.

That's not true...

That's IMPOSSIBLE!

[Eleazar]

Oh, and one other thing. You seem nice!

I've been slipping, I know

[Coochie liquor]

That is NOT a chick.

That's not true...

That's IMPOSSIBLE!

You rubbed one out to it.... Didn't ya??

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

You rubbed one out to it.... Didn't ya??

http://www.sfwpost.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/ryan-renolds-sly-smile.gif

[Coochie liquor]

http://www.sfwpost.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/ryan-renolds-sly-smile.gif

That's a good one!! Lmao!