Automatic Sperm Extractor Introduced Into A Chinese Hospital

[Pitt Gorilla]

Soooo, what's one of these things run? Asking for a friend.

Click link for pic/video of machine.

http://www.iflscience.com/technology/automatic-sperm-extractor-introduced-chinese-hospital

A Chinese hospital in Nanjing, capital of Jiangsu Province, has introduced a new machine that makes sperm donation even easier- an automatic sperm extractor. I’m all for hands-free technology, but have scientists gone a little too far with this invention?

The effortless machine features a massage pipe that can be adjusted to suit the height of the user. All the gentleman has to do is plug in the frequency, amplitude and temperature and off they go. It’s also fitted with a small screen for those feeling uninspired.

According to the director of the urology department of the hospital, the machine is designed to help individuals that are finding it difficult to retrieve sperm the old fashioned way. We're not entirely convinced that standing in a room shared by many other people and being milked like a cow is going to help, but their efforts are commendable. Here’s to technology.

[Beef Supreme]

Does it work on Hogs? Asking for a friend.

[ZootedGranny]

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/PLDGoEh7jqA" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[ModSocks]

I don't think my dick would fit in that. Clearly made for the Chinese.

[kepp]

More like sperm extfapper

[Beef Supreme]

LMAO

In the comments section of that article:
How does the idiom go? "If you build it, they will......"

[Rain Man]

I bet you could make it 20% more efficient if you installed it in a mannequin.

http://upload.ecvv.com/upload/Product/201010/China_female_mannequin_Pamela201010271452133.jpg

[BoneKrusher]

That's a lot of money wasted to build an extractor to do something their hand could do.

[ptlyon]

Probably catch more diseases than from a hooker in tijuana and WTF do they need more reproduction in China anyway?

[ThaVirus]

I don't think my dick would fit in that. Clearly made for the Chinese.

Mhmm.

[gblowfish]

That story is from a year ago. You guys haven't bought yours yet?

[BoneKrusher]

That story is from a year ago. You guys haven't bought yours yet?

I'll Pass.:thumb:

[POND_OF_RED]

Probably catch more diseases than from a hooker in tijuana and WTF do they need more reproduction in China anyway?

This. At some point we should probably think about just how stupid it is to have sperm banks in an overpopulating world.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

Jack meh off

[notorious]

I would rather mehsturbate.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

Meh 8th is fun ROFL

[Baby Lee]

Mr. Show

Hahahaha!! David looks funny with hair!!

[Eleazar]

Reading the thread title, I was picturing something more invasive as the "extractor"

[ptlyon]

Reading the thread title, I was picturing something more invasive as the "extractor"

Like the ATR button in a women's restroom

[Jiu Jitsu Jon]

Does it work on Hogs? Asking for a friend.

We really need to get with the times. The Chinese are making us look like fools. FOOLS.

[Bowser]

I already have an "Automatic Sperm Extractor". I call it "Direckshun's Whore of a Mom".

[stonedstooge]

That story is from a year ago. You guys haven't bought yours yet?

I married my machine just last week!

[Mr. Flopnuts]

Is this a Mehtag appliance?

[BoneKrusher]

Is this a Mehtag appliance?

Mehbe

[gblowfish]

Heh, this thread reminded me of an old joke I heard at my bachelor party:

Q: Why do all brides wear white?

A: All kitchen appliances come in white.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

I mehried meh mehchine just last week!

FYP

[BigMeatballDave]

I already have an "Automatic Sperm Extractor". I call it "Direckshun's Whore of a Mom".

LMAO

[BigMeatballDave]

Kung Pao Mehsterbator

[Titty Meat]

Aka baby lees butthole

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

Does it work on Hogs? Asking for a friend.

No coincidence the Chinese own the largest Hog producer and meat packer in the United States. Smithfield Foods.

[GloryDayz]

Too fat...

[RobBlake]

gotta say, disappointed in the tags