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View Full Version : Life Why I feel like I do about Fathers Day.


Al Bundy
06-20-2015, 10:24 PM
I know most people here don't really care for me, and this is not intended to gain any sympathy. I was born in 1972, long before the government cared about deadbeat dads. My dad was abusive both mentally and physically with my mom. Forcing her to have me a month early. When she finally left him (when I was 3 months old) he followed her. She had a 1972 Monte Carlo that she bad bought with him, so he had a set of keys as well. Long story short, while she was in college to become a pharmacist, he broke in and took the keys and car in order to fuck her real good. So, in the end she supported my sister and I with ZERO support from him. In 1999 we hired a PI to find him, he lived in New Mexico and had very little to nothing in his name. Everything he had was under his wife's name. In the meantime my mom worked 50 hour weeks on her feet to make sure I had what I needed as a kid and as a teenager, destroyed her back and is now retired and disabled.

Fast forward to last summer and I received a message on facebook from him under his wife's name stating that I wasn't his son because of me being born in February. My mom also received the same message. I was fucking born early because of the stress and the abuse my mom suffered at the hands of that turd. I had grown up not caring/thinking about him but after that I became consumed with a hatred for him that I have never had for anyone else.

Now, I refuse to let that bother me anymore, I just needed to get it off my chest.

Happy Fathers Day to all the real dads out there.

cdcox
06-20-2015, 10:29 PM
Take consolation that you have become a far better man than your father ever was. A real tribute to your mother.

Rasputin
06-20-2015, 10:32 PM
Doesn't have to be him to celebrate or appreciate fathers day. Be a dad if you got kids and be the best dad you can be. That's what fathers day is or be a son/daughter that has someone you look up too to appreciate.

Demonpenz
06-20-2015, 10:40 PM
Sorry to hear that. Did you have a paturnaty test done?

mdchiefsfan
06-20-2015, 10:44 PM
Dude, I grew up listening to my father verbally abusing my mother on a daily basis for crap that had nothing to do with her.

I would ask for him to go out and play only to be let down; he'd lay on the sofa and bitch at us ( I have 3 brothers) if I made the floor creak above him. I genuinely feared 3 pm because that was when he got home from work.

Now that I have two step kids of my own, as a result of my step father, I know I would never do something like that to a child.

Did it hurt? Hell yes. But am I going to let it dictate my life? Hell no! There are shitbags everywhere. Be who you want to be, and I hope your father dies with a rusty cock up his ass!

Rasputin
06-20-2015, 10:45 PM
Sorry to hear that. Did you have a paturnaty test done?

<a href="http://photobucket.com/images/maury%20you%20are%20not%20the%20father" target="_blank"><img src="http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f341/nokimbo/these-women-are-lying_zps6a1749ff.jpg" border="0" alt="maury you are not the father photo: NOT THE FATHER these-women-are-lying_zps6a1749ff.jpg"/></a>

Bugeater
06-20-2015, 10:45 PM
My story isn't quite as bad, but similar in that my dad was a deadbeat and my mom deserves all the credit for who me and my brothers have become. So yeah, Father's Day isn't particularly special for me either.

Al Bundy
06-20-2015, 10:47 PM
Sorry to hear that. Did you have a paturnaty test done?

No, I really never wanted anything to do with him. My feeling is that he is nearing the end of his life and really doesn't want any money going to anyone but his current family. But, my mom nor I need any money from him.

Demonpenz
06-20-2015, 11:01 PM
mine as well let him die, but if you don't know for sure if you are his son I would cut him a break.

Hammock Parties
06-20-2015, 11:04 PM
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

stevieray
06-20-2015, 11:09 PM
Not totally worthless, can be used as a bad example.

I encourage you' to try to find it in your heart to forgive him.

BigRedChief
06-20-2015, 11:11 PM
I know most people here don't really care for me, and this is not intended to gain any sympathy. I was born in 1972, long before the government cared about deadbeat dads. My dad was abusive both mentally and physically with my mom. Forcing her to have me a month early. When she finally left him (when I was 3 months old) he followed her. She had a 1972 Monte Carlo that she bad bought with him, so he had a set of keys as well. Long story short, while she was in college to become a pharmacist, he broke in and took the keys and car in order to fuck her real good. So, in the end she supported my sister and I with ZERO support from him. In 1999 we hired a PI to find him, he lived in New Mexico and had very little to nothing in his name. Everything he had was under his wife's name. In the meantime my mom worked 50 hour weeks on her feet to make sure I had what I needed as a kid and as a teenager, destroyed her back and is now retired and disabled.

Fast forward to last summer and I received a message on facebook from him under his wife's name stating that I wasn't his son because of me being born in February. My mom also received the same message. I was fucking born early because of the stress and the abuse my mom suffered at the hands of that turd. I had grown up not caring/thinking about him but after that I became consumed with a hatred for him that I have never had for anyone else.

Now, I refuse to let that bother me anymore, I just needed to get it off my chest.

Happy Fathers Day to all the real dads out there.I know the feeling.

My Dad drank a case of beer a day for as long as I can remember. Every single day. Christmas etc. He was verbally and physcially abusive. He told me twice in my life that I had did a good job with something. He was selfish and mean to my Mom. Thats just the short list that I learned on how NOT to be a Dad.

Buehler445
06-20-2015, 11:12 PM
Take consolation that you have become a far better man than your father ever was. A real tribute to your mother.

/thread.

People are shitty. Unfortunately sometimes they share your genetics. But don't let it get in your head. My sister and I are axiomatically different. I really feel you couldn't recombine genetic material and get 2 more different results. So just because he's family doesn't mean you owe him shit.

TimBone
06-20-2015, 11:40 PM
Well, since everybody else is sharing, I'll share as well. My father walked out on my mom shortly after I was born. He refused to claim me, yet claimed my sister who was born a year earlier. My mother worked three jobs to take care of us alone until I was about five. Then she met the man who stepped in and raised us like we were his own. Normally, most kids whose dad walks out on them feel cheated in life, but I actually feel like I received a privilege that kids with both of their original parents living together don't receive. I got to see the bad, I know what a bad father is, because I had one that abandoned me. On the flip side, I also got to see the great. I saw a man step in to raise my sister and I, add two more children to our family, and legally adopt me at the age of 12. He has flaws like any other man, but he's given me an example to look up to, that I wouldn't have had otherwise.

I don't often think of my original father, and I had zero emotion when he passed a few years back. In fact a lot of times I have to be reminded that he ever existed. I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that I have a wonderful Dad that has given me much more than the original ever would have even if he had stuck around. My dad has punished me, given me the traditional father/son moments, and has given me good life lessons throughout my childhood/adult years. And he did all of that by choice, that makes it seem even more special.

cabletech94
06-21-2015, 06:40 AM
anyone can be a father. but it take a MAN to be one. or something like that.

jeesus cripes!!! some of you guys have terrible stories, glad (most of you) have had great moms and have come out decent.


p.s. stop, chiefs: there's nothing quite like a shorn scrotum.

/dr evil

ChiTown
06-21-2015, 06:56 AM
Sorry to hear these sad stories of shitty Dads. My Father was an amazing man. A WWII vet that survived being a combat pilot. He worked 40 years after the War for the same company. He worked as a laborer in a warehouse. Never complained about his shitty job, because he knew it provided for his Family. He was my football coach throughout grade school, assisted in every science fair project I ever did (hell, he did most of the work), loved his wife and Family and was the role model I used to be the Man I am today.

I miss him greatly. I will be thinking of him today as I sit in the stands of Kaufman Stadium. I'll be honoring his memory by doing what he loved doing - spending time with his Family. Happy Father's Day, Dad. RIP.

ChiefRocka
06-21-2015, 07:24 AM
Have you ever spoken to someone not on the Internet about it? Seriously, it works wonders. Address it, remember it, evolve, adapt and continue forward being a better man/father in spite of it.

hometeam
06-21-2015, 07:26 AM
I didnt meet my dad until i was 12. He left my mom when she was pregnant with me. I also had a POS stepdad that I wont go into details about, but he was scum of the earth.

I couldn't care less. I dont let it effect me in day to day shit, because I figure it worked out and I am generally happy.

So fuck it. Happy fathers day to me and I just try to be the best dad I can to my kid~

J Diddy
06-21-2015, 07:32 AM
I didnt meet my dad until i was 12. He left my mom when she was pregnant with me. I also had a POS stepdad that I wont go into details about, but he was scum of the earth.

I couldn't care less. I dont let it effect me in day to day shit, because I figure it worked out and I am generally happy.

So **** it. Happy fathers day to me and I just try to be the best dad I can to my kid~

You change that 12 to 11 and that's my story. Well sort of. I had a couple of good step dads who picked up the slack and a couple who if given an aids bath in an antifreeze fire wouldn't be harsh enough.

Al Bundy
06-21-2015, 07:36 AM
I was lucky, I had several other male role models in my life when I was younger. Including sports coaches and my best friends dad. As far as a paternity test? Not a chance would I ever go out of my way for that, especially for that waste of space.

-King-
06-21-2015, 07:37 AM
Not totally worthless, can be used as a bad example.

I encourage you' to try to find it in your heart to forgive him.

lolwut

-King-
06-21-2015, 07:38 AM
You change that 12 to 11 and that's my story. Well sort of. I had a couple of good step dads who picked up the slack and a couple who if given an aids bath in an antifreeze fire wouldn't be harsh enough.

Jeez, how many step dads did you have?

J Diddy
06-21-2015, 07:40 AM
I was lucky, I had several other male role models in my life when I was younger. Including sports coaches and my best friends dad. As far as a paternity test? Not a chance would I ever go out of my way for that, especially for that waste of space.

I hear you there.

IMO, sounds like his conscience is bugging him and he's looking for an easy way out.

J Diddy
06-21-2015, 07:41 AM
Jeez, how many step dads did you have?

Technically I had 3 and a guy who was my mom's boyfriend.

Picking men was not my mother's strength.

srvy
06-21-2015, 07:42 AM
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

Someone really likes Dr Evil.

stevieray
06-21-2015, 08:06 AM
lolwut

You really need it explained ?

BigRedChief
06-21-2015, 08:58 AM
anyone can be a father. but it take a MAN to be one. or something like that.

jeesus cripes!!! some of you guys have terrible stories, glad (most of you) have had great moms and have come out decent.We have no choice who is our Dad, what color our skin, hair, eyes are. But, when you become a man, you are responsible for your actions and attitude. So you had a shitty Dad, many others did too. Move on and live your life.

JakeLV
06-21-2015, 09:16 AM
Disgusting individual.

You seem to have turned out pretty well.

That's waht shitty people do. Try to tear you down. He's right. That dude is not your father, he's just got the wrong reasons.

-King-
06-21-2015, 09:41 AM
You really need it explained ?

He shouldn't have to do shit. If he doesn't want to forgive a guy that was a piece of shit to his mother and his family overall, that's fine. I encourage him to do whatever he wants. If he wants to drive to his dad's house and take a shit on the porch every morning, that's just fine.
Posted via Mobile Device

stevieray
06-21-2015, 12:00 PM
He shouldn't have to do shit.
Posted via Mobile Device
I don't think you get to determine that for him or anyone else.

shitting on his porch? great example of rising above.

Hog's Gone Fishin
06-21-2015, 12:22 PM
My dad taught me everything in life. He at one time was a zoo veterinarian. Together we developed a huge semen collection, some of which I still have. In fact , this is the first time I've shared but, in my Avy, that's Elmer , we masturbated him to death. Loaded him in the back of the truck and kicked him out on the highway in Denver.

cabletech94
06-21-2015, 01:02 PM
We have no choice who is our Dad, what color our skin, hair, eyes are. But, when you become a man, you are responsible for your actions and attitude. So you had a shitty Dad, many others did too. Move on and live your life.

#respect

scho63
06-21-2015, 04:23 PM
My dad taught me everything in life. He at one time was a zoo veterinarian. Together we developed a huge semen collection, some of which I still have. In fact , this is the first time I've shared but, in my Avy, that's Elmer , we masturbated him to death. Loaded him in the back of the truck and kicked him out on the highway in Denver.

:spock:

http://www.technologytell.com/gadgets/files/2014/05/JqS6luU.gif

http://31.media.tumblr.com/b75d451dd99e81c27eed30cb844c5dbf/tumblr_n8gbqqlmyY1s6hrz6o1_400.gif

Bowser
06-21-2015, 04:39 PM
Take consolation that you have become a far better man than your father ever was. A real tribute to your mother.

QFT

tecumseh
06-21-2015, 05:08 PM
In life, you can learn something from everyone. Either how to be, act, think, etc. Or how not to. Be attentive. Most adults can become the person they want to be.

-King-
06-21-2015, 11:34 PM
I don't think you get to determine that for him or anyone else.


:spock: That was exactly the point. If he wants to do it, cool. If he doesn't, cool. Encouraging him one way or the other is dumb and intrusive.

stevieray
06-21-2015, 11:54 PM
:spock: That was exactly the point. If he wants to do it, cool. If he doesn't, cool. Encouraging him one way or the other is dumb and intrusive.
That's not what you said....and If you've got a problem with someone encouraging forgiveness, that defines you, not me.

TimBone
06-22-2015, 01:30 AM
:spock: That was exactly the point. If he wants to do it, cool. If he doesn't, cool. Encouraging him one way or the other is dumb and intrusive.

That's not what you said....and If you've got a problem with someone encouraging forgiveness, that defines you, not me.
You're both arguing about something dumb.

Shutup.

BucEyedPea
06-22-2015, 05:35 AM
My dad taught me everything in life. He at one time was a zoo veterinarian. Together we developed a huge semen collection, some of which I still have. In fact , this is the first time I've shared but, in my Avy, that's Elmer , we masturbated him to death. Loaded him in the back of the truck and kicked him out on the highway in Denver.

Elmer of Elmer's Glue? My sis, one of them, married one of the heirs to that fortune.

stevieray
06-22-2015, 09:03 AM
You're both arguing about something dumb.

Shutup.

I offered support.

He got butthurt.

Now you're butthurt , too.

STFU, n00b.