Things fans can trust more than the Chiefs

[Iowanian]

Please friends, gather around the fire and listen to uncle Iowanian for a minute.

I would like to play a game called " things I trust more than the Chiefs winning"

I will start, the greatest contribution, the one that can bring me laughter and a hat tip to your creativity will get a handsome reward.


1. I trust a stranger on a cruise ship, suffering Norovirus, farting while sitting on my lap more than the Chiefs winning.

[Hammock Parties]

2. I trust that I will get removed for thread abuse more than the Chiefs winning.

[Dave Lane]

Are you wearing white pants?

Because it matters and its after Labor Day

[Sorter]

2. I trust that I will get removed for thread abuse more than the Chiefs winning.

LMAO

[oaklandhater]

I trust Gruden to suck off what ever QB we are playing against when he is announcing more then the chiefs winning.

[Iowanian]

Are you wearing white pants?

Because it matters and its after Labor Day

I am switching to leggings to start a trend of comfort for men, rocking the moose knuckle as the new royals rally cap.


I trust Dave lane to take my kids to bible school more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Strongside]

Obama.

[Iowanian]

I trust a milk jug Hal's full of yellow liquid laying along the interstate to be country time lemonade more than I trust the Chiefs

[Bob Dole]

A leaky innertube on a 4 hour float trip.

[Dayze]

I trust Ollie from Hoosiers to pull off a 360, ball between the legs, backboard braking slam dunk, more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Iowanian]

I trust a half eaten fish sandwich is a gas station bathroom more than Alex smith and the Chiefs.

[Strongside]

I fully trust the Chiefs. I trust that they will do absolutely nothing to hold anyone accountable for the current mess they're in.

[Rasputin]

I trust Lorena Bobbit with a pare of scissors on a date and sleeping in her bed to not cut off my testicles.

[Dayze]

I trust Clint Howard's hair care product recommendations, and dental hygiene tips more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Dave Lane]

I trust Alex Smith less than a loose meat sandwich that had been sitting in a dumpster in Calcutta, for 8 days, in 106 degree summer heat underneath the carcasses of 3 goats, 7 chickens and a river of coagulated blood, in the the poor section of Calcutta not the part with eating utensils.

[Strongside]

I trust a fart after eating Aramark hotdogs at the K more...

[notorious]

I trust protection-free sex during a gangbang in Botswana more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Strongside]

I trust protection-free sex during a gangbang in Botswana more than I trust the Chiefs.

Still safer than the same scenario in Raytown.

[Iowanian]

I would trust the condom billay has kept in his wallet since high school more than the Chiefs.

[srvy]

I trust Hillary Clintons server more that I trust the Chiefs to win a game.

[srvy]

Actually I trust Bill and Hillary to tell me the truth more the Andy to say we will get it fixed and get better.

[Dave Lane]

I do trust the Chiefs more than any candidate the GOP has.

[BullJunkandIron]

I trust Alex Smith to be the NFL MVP more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Iowanian]

You could trust your mother in law with your internet history more than you can trust the Chiefs.

[Ming the Merciless]

Am email from a Nigerian prince, telling me that all I need to do is send him $1000 in moneygram and I will get $100K

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/201111/r855667_8143842.jpg

[Iowanian]

I trust Bill Cosby having my Mrs. Over for a night cap more than I trust the Chiefs.

[srvy]

I trust Jamaals blown out knee to only be an ankle twist than the Chiefs to win a game.

[BullJunkandIron]

I trust the American voters to select the correct President more than I trust the Chiefys to win.

[srvy]

I trust a Bob Sutton defense to stop a third and long pass play before I will trust the Chiefs to win.

[Iowanian]

I trust the 1980s movie axe murderer to let me take a shower in peace after I have recently discovered my sorority sisters dead more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Ming the Merciless]

http://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/01-three-dollar-bill-g-w-bush-e1281670010136.jpg

[Strongside]

The Pioli regime.

[notorious]

I trust myself around a bag of Hostess Powdered Donettes more than the Chiefs.

[wazu]

I trust Hootie with my Fanduel money more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[notorious]

I trust Hootie with my Fanduel money more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

LMAO

[Rain Man]

I trust Cairo Santos to make a 66-yard field goal more than I trust the Chiefs to win a game.

[Ming the Merciless]

http://marieclaire.media.ipcdigital.co.uk/11116/00008a484/00fd_orh100000w646/Caitlyn-Jenner-Halloween-costume.jpg

[Kman34]

I would trust Jerod Fogel with an 14 yr old girl in the dark watching pornography...than the Chiefs to win more than 3 games...

[Iowanian]

I trust an Indian with 00000000000 phone number who randomly calls my cell regarding seriously concerning messages received by Microsoft with my computer passwords....more than I trust Andy Reid and the Chiefs.

[stevieray]

I trust my apathy to remain at a high level.

[notorious]

I would trust a Catholic priest with my son during a sleepover more than the Chiefs.

[cdcox]

I trust Kaepernick to win a SB in SF more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Dayze]

I would trust a Catholic priest with my son during a sleepover more than the Chiefs.

LMAO

[srvy]

I trust a nice safe stroll through an Isis training camp in the Iraqi desert wearing a Uncle Sam suit than a chiefs win.

[srvy]

I would trust Donald Trumps hair to not fly off in a stiff breeze than the Chiefs.

[srvy]

With the last penny to my name.
http://www.zerohedge.com/sites/default/files/images/user5/imageroot/2014/01/Madoff%20prison.jpg

[BullJunkandIron]

I trust a BK Halloween Whopper won't make my poop bright Play Doh green than I do the Chiefs.

[teedubya]

I trust Bernie Madoff with my life savings more than I trust the Chiefs.

[LoneWolf]

I trust Deberg not to start a shitty thread more than I trust the Chiefs.

I trust Clay not to jerk off at the premiere of the new Star Wars movie more than I trust the Chiefs.

I trust Hootie on a date with my sister more than I trust the Chiefs.

I trust Daru to win the National Spelling Bee contest more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Hammock Parties]

I trust LoneWolf to admit his total and complete wrongness about the 2015 Chiefs more than I trust the Chiefs.

[LoneWolf]

I trust LoneWolf to admit his total and complete wrongness about the 2015 Chiefs more than I trust the Chiefs.

I was completely wrong about the talent level of this team and the coaching of this team. I was never a staunch supporter of Alex Smith. I just got tired of the constant Smith bashing in every damn thread.

I am officially gay for Goff. I will not root for this team to lose because that isn't in my nature, but I will not actively root for them to win. I will watch the games as I watch any other TV show. For pure entertainment.

[Hammock Parties]

Good boy.

[Psyko Tek]

I was completely wrong about the talent level of this team and the coaching of this team. I was never a staunch supporter of Alex Smith. I just got tired of the constant Smith bashing in every damn thread.

I am officially gay for Goff. I will not root for this team to lose because that isn't in my nature, but I will not actively root for them to win. I will watch the games as I watch any other TV show. For pure entertainment.

without JC
What's gonna be entertaining?

adndy reid is dumb
bobn suttom is dumber

dumb and dumber coach football?

[Perineum Ripper]

I trust a stripper with my credit card more than teh Chiefs

[ping2000]

I trust KU football more than the Chiefs. OMG. What?

[New World Order]

I trust KU football more than the Chiefs. OMG. What?


That would be one hell of a game.

[Lonewolf Ed]

I trust an Indian with 00000000000 phone number who randomly calls my cell regarding seriously concerning messages received by Microsoft with my computer passwords....more than I trust Andy Reid and the Chiefs.

I know that guy! He calls here, too!

[Coochie liquor]

I would trust Jim jones (the poster) to pick me out a female server at Hamburger Mary's to go home with more than I trust the Chiefs.

[raybec 4]

I trust fat Andy's kids not to touch my heroine more than I trust the Chiefs to win

[raybec 4]

I trust BEP to be a member of the electoral college more than I trust the Chiefs

[BullJunkandIron]

I trust Bergdahl on perimeter guard more than I trust the Chiefs.

[rabblerouser]

I trust a fart not to be a shart more than the Chiefs.

[KCUnited]

A shower with Sandusky

[KCUnited]

Caitlyn Jenner's cameltoe

[BullJunkandIron]

Alex Smith making it to the Hall of Fame. Alex in the gold jacket.

[Simply Red]

I would trust my colon to safely secure and contain a Taco Bell Cheesy Chili burrito for hours after consumption.

[KCUnited]

BarryKoolAids around your last box of Sudafed.

[ptlyon]

I don't trust anything, and that's because of the Chiefs

[notorious]

I trust Andy Reid following through on a diet more than the Chiefs.

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I trust Obama to do what is good for America more than I trust the Chiefs ability to win.

[dlphg9]

I trust the table that Hootie went through is solid oak more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Coochie liquor]

I trust Clay to eat a bug if he loses a bet, more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Bwana]

I would trust a group of 10 year olds to have an enjoyable first time swim in the ocean after viewing the movie JAWS the night before, more than I trust the Chiefs.

https://media.giphy.com/media/p6FkGtu91xROE/giphy.gif

[Iowanian]

I trust the old server on game day more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Iowanian]

I would trust the advice offered by the top 5 posters in the dating thread on how to make a woman climax more than I trust the Chiefs.

[KCUnited]

A Porsche driving experience with Paul Walker.

[Dayze]

I would trust hospice care administered by BadGirl, before I trust the Chiefs.

[ChiTown]

Jason Pierre-Paul teaching my kids how to light fireworks

[KCUnited]

Hydration advice from Korey Stringer.

[notorious]

I would trust a "redshirt" Star Trek character with a generic name to survive more than the Chiefs.

[ExtremeChief]

I would trust Sedated with my last bag of weed more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Iowanian]

I'd trust marital conflict resolution advice from OJ Simpson more than I trust Andy Reid and the Chiefs.

[King_Chief_Fan]

Mexican tap water

[ChiTown]

Lorena Bobbitt shaving my scrotum

[Bwana]

I would trust sitting next to pee wee Herman at a XXX and not getting any pecker snot on me more than I trust the Chiefs.

https://media.giphy.com/media/PGwU07sFqGh0c/giphy.gif

[KCUnited]

The grapple line and harness at Kemper Arena.

[ChiTown]

An airplane ride with John Denver

[ChiTown]

A night out on the town with Biggie and Tupac

[KCUnited]

Bath time with Andrea Yates.

[scho63]

Top Ten Things I trust more than the Chiefs winning:

1. My Mom and Dad rising from the dead

2. The leaders of Iran, Russia, and North Korea

3. Winning the Powerball lottery next time it exceeds $100 million dollars

4. Having a menage-a-trois with Salma Hayek and Kate Upton within the next year

5. Obama will resign and Hillary will be arrested before the end of football season

6. General Electric will hire me to be their new CEO

7. The Pulitzer Prize will be awarded to me for my fantastic CP threads and posts

8. The next Silicon Valley dot-com billion dollar startup will be my company and idea

9. Being on next year's cover of People Magazine as Sexiest Man Alive

10. I become the hottest DILF in Porn Star history, named "Ho Lovin Scho"

[Coochie liquor]

I would trust Andy Reid to hold my order of deep fried Oreos at the fair while I ride the Ferris wheel more than I trust him to call a good game on a consistent basis.

[KCUnited]

Dave Owen as a crosswalk guard.

[King_Chief_Fan]

A fart when i am fighting the flu

[Dartgod]

I trust Alex Gordon will get a base hit with runner(s) in scoring position and two outs more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Perineum Ripper]

I trust Hitler with 100 Jews in a large shower room more than the Chiefs

[Pasta Little Brioni]

Matt Cassel to put a hat on properly

[Pasta Little Brioni]

blackbob to not return and pretend it's not him

[gblowfish]

I trust Lucy holding that football so I can run up and kick it....

[Iowanian]

I trust Milli Vanilli to sing their own songs more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

I trust knowmo to produce an unbiased bronco take more than the Chief shit show

[Iowanian]

I'd trust a wife with a new haircut, sparkle pocket jeans and a tinder account more than the Chiefs

[bevischief]

2 short buses colliding...

[sd4chiefs]

I trust politicians to always tell the truth and do what's right for the American people and not be influenced by lobbyist than I do the Chiefs.

[bevischief]

A wet dream.

[notorious]

I trust AA Chiefs fans around a 30 of Natty more than the Chiefs.

[bevischief]

A. Flushing toilet.

[Iowanian]

I trust the drop of cold water rocketing up from a turd splashing into it more than I trust Andy Reid and the Chiefs to make me happy.

[King_Chief_Fan]

Hillary Clinton telling a war story reported by Brian Williams

[King_Chief_Fan]

I trust Lucy holding that football so I can run up and kick it....

Thats a winner

[Iowanian]

I trust Lucy holding that football so I can run up and kick it....

That would make a great photoshop.

[Coochie liquor]

I'd trust Jeffrey Dahmer to cater my child's birthday party, than the fucking Chiefs.

[Coochie liquor]

I'd trust Rex Ryan and Bufkin to give foot massages at my sisters bachelorette party, before I trust the Chiefs!

[Iowanian]

I would trust a crocodile for a blowjob more than I trust the Chiefs.

[bevischief]

A cold one.

[Iowanian]

I trust competing organizations with my business proposals and bidding strategies a month before due more than I trust the Chiefs.

[CanadianChiefs]

Ben Roethlisberger in a bathroom stall

[CanadianChiefs]

Mike Vick looking after my dog while I'm on vacation

[CanadianChiefs]

Ray Lewis with a knife near downtown Atlanta

[Dayze]

I trust Marshawn Lynch performing a high risk surgery on me before I trust the Chiefs.

"Bruh, I've been here like the whole time".

[CanadianChiefs]

THE NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS

[a pp roach]

Magikarp doing damage on splash attack

[SAUTO]

You guys are fucking crazy

[Iowanian]

I trust a 1985 Yugo with 120,000 miles to get me back home from Alaska without breakdowns more than the Chiefs.


I trust a GEO metro to help me get laid by hot gold diggers more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[notorious]

I trust a dark basement of a house built on a tribal grave more than the Chiefs.

[Iowanian]

I trust Terri shiavos husband to manage my living will if I am a millionaire and he is my executor more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[loochy]

I trust Bill Clinton to tell the truth under oath more than I trust the Chiefs to win

[Iowanian]

I would rather smoke one of bill clintons cigars at a Jenny Craig convention than trust the Chiefs to win.

[cmh6476]

I trust Suddenlink to have a Royals playoff game on regular programming more than the Chiefs


because Chiefs

[TinyEvel]

I trust Kansas City Sushi not being overloaded with sauce, and not giving me the squirts.

[TinyEvel]

I trust Seedot in a Pokemon battle against Groudon.

[Setsuna]

I trust Seedot in a Pokemon battle against Groudon.

ROFLROFLROFLROFL Grass is super effective against Ground doh. Just sayin.

[stonedstooge]

I'd trust Joe Delaney lifeguarding my kids more than the KC Cheefs winning

[srvy]

I would trust a cool dip at Coffin Bay, Australia in my black seal colored scuba suit among multiple White shark tour boats chumming the waters than a chiefs win.

[Iowanian]

I trust a pocket Pussy made out of a porcupine hide more than the Chiefs.

[bevischief]

A condom with needle holes in it.

[loochy]

I trust Lamar Odom to make wise life decisions more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Rausch]

I trust a 110 lb blonde handing me some MGD that's been sitting there in the sun all day, and what might happen after, more than Reid/Dorsey...

[loochy]

I trust CP members to correctly use the words to, too, your, and you're more than I trust the chiefs to win.

[Rausch]

I trust CP members to correctly use the words to, too, your, and you're more than I trust the chiefs to win.

I love you...

[loochy]

I love you...

I trust you to physically demonstrate your love more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

[Rausch]

I trust you to physically demonstrate your love more than I trust the Chiefs to win.

I trust that I will spontaneously become gay and consummate that before the Chiefs win a playoff game...

[bevischief]

A fart.

[Coochie liquor]

I would trust using a needle found outside of an AIDS clinic more than the Chiefs

[notorious]

North Korean Propaganda.

[bevischief]

Toilet paper.

[Clyde Frog]

A girl you pick up first night you meet, for a one night stand saying, "I never do this"

[Clyde Frog]

Steve Rannazzisi being in the World Trade center

Herbal Viagra

[bevischief]

The bar/stripper tab.

[BullJunkandIron]

Snoop Dog watching after my stash

[Iowanian]

I trust Madson throwing in the 8th inning of the ALCS with 2 men on and a 3 run lead more than I trust the Chiefs.

[BullJunkandIron]

Bag of dicks leaving a better taste in your mouth than the Chiefs stopping an opponents 4th quarter scoring drive.

[Iowanian]

I trust the cans of beer I found In a cooler in my outbuilding more than I trust the Chiefs. I haven't seen that cooler in 2 summers.

[GoShox]

I trust the Colts' fake punt plays to succeed more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Dayze]

I trust the cans of beer I found In a cooler in my outbuilding more than I trust the Chiefs. I haven't seen that cooler in 2 summers.

LMAO

[Iowanian]

You could trust a girl from Tinder with half a dozen oozing sores on her lips more than you can trust the Chiefs.

[kepp]

I'd trust a colonoscopy from Freddy Mercury more than I'd trust the Chiefs.

[Rasputin]

I trust Guns N Roses to put out a new album before I trust Chiefs.

[Ming the Merciless]

Mav's loyalty as a solid Chiefs fan for life

[Clyde Frog]

Kirkland brand condoms

[Sweet Daddy Hate]

I trust the sweet, horsey taste of McDonalds 100% "pure beef" more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Dayze]

Guys in skinny jeans.

Guys with what looks like bedazzled items stitch on their back pockets of their jeans in a decorative pattern

Iced tea made with Mexican tap water

Mike Tyson passing NFL concussion protocols.

[Iowanian]

I trust Johnny cueto pitching on the road in prime time more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Iowanian]

I trust a DOT enforcement officer to give a warning ticket and be a good guy more than I trust the Chiefs.


I trust my son with an open bag of cookies when I am outside more than I trust the Chiefs.

[Iowanian]

I guess it turned out to be a dry fart after all!