Need advice for my friend

[Bufkin]

I have this friend who's girlfriend is starting to grow a bit of a mustache. He says that it's somewhat obscure from a distance because she's a natural blonde, but is extremely noticeable when they kiss and are up close in bed.

What are some ways that my friend can hint to his girlfriend that it's a distraction without pissing her off? Women can be like bombs sometimes.

[Chief Northman]

Just man up and tell your wife to get some electrolysis done....

[Pablo]

Shove a thumb up her ass and wipe the residue on her upper lip. Should take the focus off the peach fuzz and you can taste yesterday's breakfast when you kiss her too.

[MIAdragon]

"Friend"

[Pablo]

"Friend"

I believe him. It's well known that Mormons are largely homosexuals.

[DaNewGuy]

I believe him. It's well known that Mormons are largely homosexuals.

Heh

[Why Not?]

Your friend is a dumbass if he's either asking for or willing to accept relationship advice garnered from a message board. This one in particular.

[MotherfuckerJones]

ROFL

[Sandy Vagina]

Straight up honesty. Just find some tactful words.

"Baby, don't take this the wrong way. Most girls secretly have to do this, and so with that... out of respect to your benefit, I think you'd want to know that you should do a little wax job above your upper lip."

:shrug: ..

[Jewish Rabbi]

I'd go the passive aggressive route and leave razors on the kitchen table over a picture of lips, or pay a clown to kidnap her and shave that lip himself.

[Demonpenz]

Turn on Magnum P.I. and say "I fucking hate this show? Then pop in the dvd of Powder

[KCUnited]

You point out other women's mustaches, real or not, and how sickening they are until she checks her own.

[TribalElder]

Tell her to shave that beard and stache

[Pablo]

Bufkin, tell her it's not all the tent hand jobs you gave your scout master that haunt your dreams anymore. But his creepy flesh tone stache that's had you breaking out in night sweats.

She'll figure it out.

[alpha_omega]

Bail. Guaranteed she is aware of it and is just too lazy to do anything about it.

[Dinny Bossa Nova]

Sounds like she's handsome.

Dinny

[Kman34]

Justin Verlander needs to get his shit together and tell Kate to wax that thing....

[Simply Red]

he just needs to break up with her.

[eDave]

he just needs to break up with her.

The only real solution here.

[Buzz]

and you are not turned off by the nipple hair? Must have a lot of testosterone, bet she fucks like a beast...

[big nasty kcnut]

tell him to get a gift card for a all day spa with hair removal added on. Do something nice and get rid of the hair.

[Toby Waller]

what woman even thinks they should not change that?

[eDave]

what woman even thinks they should not change that?

Kate Upton

[Fish]

No hint is necessary. He should tell his sasquatch lady to trim her stache, easy as that.

[kccrow]

tell him to get a gift card for a all day spa with hair removal added on. Do something nice and get rid of the hair.

This. He looks like a saint in her eyes for doing something "so wonderful," while he gets what he wants without being a dick.

Unless they've been together a long time, then just man up and tell the bitch to shave her 'stache.

[Scorp]

Print out this poem:

Baby, I only say this because I care
I feel that everything we should share
What you have above you lip
doesn't make women very hip
waxing is what women do
with that hair lip you should too
you are beautiful in almost every way
but when we kiss, I feel almost gay

[kccrow]

Print out this poem:

Baby, I only say this because I care
I feel that everything we should share
What you have above you lip
doesn't make women very hip
waxing is what women do
with that hair lip you should too
you are beautiful in almost every way
but when we kiss, I feel almost gay

hahahaha

[Rain Man]

Put hot wax on your own upper lip and then give her a long and romantic kiss. It'll take care of itself.

[Buzz]

Tell her you want to try bondage, duct tape her mouth shut, PIINHB, then rip that shit off.

[listopencil]

Wait until she's asleep and smear some Nair on it. Read the bottle to find out how long it is supposed to stay on there. After the correct time has passed, use a wet wipe to quickly remove it and pretend that a spider was crawling on her face but you got it for her when she wakes up.

[Rain Man]

Tell her you want to try bondage, duct tape her mouth shut, PIINHB, then rip that shit off.

That's a really good idea. No, it's a great idea.

[digger]

Anti-Freeze

[Chiefshrink]

"Honey, I have noticed you like drinking a lot of milk. Do you not feel the residue on your upper lip at times after you drink?:D

[DaneMcCloud]

Do Not Feed The Trolls

[kccrow]

Do Not Feed The Trolls

All trolls must be fed. Preferably something laced with antifreeze.

[jspchief]

Dump her. Obviously not going to marry a woman with a mustache so what's the point in dating her?

[RINGLEADER]

This ain't snapchat woman.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

Probably a big bush too

[Bufkin]

Do Not Feed The Trolls
This friend also has a cousin who is developmentally disabled. What are some Dane approved terms that my friend could use towards his cousin that would make him a gargantuan piece of shit? I'm talking soulless things that would essentially make him the biggest shit on this hemisphere. My plan is for him to get so riled up, that he comes to Chiefs Planet, shoots baby gravy about doing cocaine with Matt Dillon, and then leaves with a bang by making a crybaby "peace out" thread. Followed by coming back in full swing of course shortly thereafter.

Thanks in advance.

[BlackHelicopters]

Mods. What the hell?

[cabletech94]

Tit pics or gtfo!

/everyone is thinking it......

[kepp]

"I read that semen is great for removing lip fuzz."

[scho63]

http://brostrick-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/best-beard-trimmer-reviews-2015-stubble-mustache-trimmers-2016.png

[BlackHelicopters]

How did this happen?

[Holladay]

Tell him to grow a mustache and he won't notice. If she says she doesn't like it, well neither do I.

[Iowanian]

I think you show her a pair of matching socks. Show her a pair of matching spoons. A pair of matching $20 bills.


Then ask her to wax her honey badger....and then tell her to make her lip match that.

[raybec 4]

What the fuck is gooney googoo Gus?