Question about funerals.

[Hoopsdoc]

I'm supposed to be a pall bearer at my wife's grandmothers funeral tomorrow. Has anyone here ever done this before? Would like some advice on what to expect.

And no, nudes of my wife will not be forthcoming. Or the grandmother.

[Bewbies]

Typically I'd recommend sweat pants and a healthy buzz prior to the festivities. Also, your wife would most likely appreciate you making a move on her during the service.

[Rasputin]

Don't drop her :shrug:

[chinaski]

I did it at my mom's funeral. That was 20 years ago, and honestly I don't remember much about it. I was pretty numb during the entire process, but it's nothing to overthink. Basically you are carrying a casket with 5 other guys from the Hearse to the Gravesite. It ain't rocket science.

[TrebMaxx]

First off condolences to your family. No disrespect intended but hopefully she wasn't overweight. A casket with a heavy person can be a bit awkward. Other than that the funeral director will guide you all the the way so just follow his\hers directions.

[Rasputin]

Don't think about farting. What ever you do don't think about anything funny about farting.

[Rasputin]

Also my condolences. R.I.P. Grams

[FlaChief58]

I was in the honor guard in the Air force. Just carry the casket to where they tell you to, be quiet and dignified. that's really all there is to it

[Hoopsdoc]

Typically I'd recommend sweat pants and a healthy buzz prior to the festivities. Also, your wife would most likely appreciate you making a move on her during the service.

If it starts getting slow, I'll definitely try this. Maybe drop my pants and whip it out right there in the graveyard. :thumb:

[Hoopsdoc]

First off condolences to your family. No disrespect intended but hopefully she wasn't overweight. A casket with a heavy person can be a bit awkward. Other than that the funeral director will guide you all the the way so just follow his\hers directions.

Actually, the funeral director is who I'll be relying on. I was worrying about it and then I thought, wait a minute, this is his JOB. He'll tell me what to do.

[Rain Man]

Just do what you're told and keep a good grip. The grip part is really important. Put a handkerchief or something in your pocket if it's warm enough that you'll have sweaty hands.

[KCUnited]

Lift with your legs.

[SAUTO]

Six people should be able to carry anyone no problem

[Holladay]

Six people should be able to carry anyone no problem

Dunno about that. The weight and awkwardness will surprise you. I have a bunch of older clients. I go to 4-8 funerals a year and have been a Pall Bearer a lot. I think the type of casket is a large variable, the stoutness (age) of the men, and of course the weight of the dead person. If you have to carry the coffin for very long at the grave yard, you have to be wary of the tombstones that are short off the grass. It is awkward as hell. I like to be on the front left...you don't trip on the guys feet in front of you and I am right handed.

All in all, nothing to be really worried about. I appreciate the honor.

[Bugeater]

The funeral home will run you through what you need to do, it's not a big deal. Just dress nicely and possibly shower beforehand as well.

[LoneWolf]

If it starts getting slow, I'll definitely try this. Maybe drop my pants and whip it out right there in the graveyard. :thumb:

One more stiffy in the graveyard can't hurt.

[scho63]

Condolences to you and your family.

A little over a year ago I was one of 8 pallbearers for my aunt's funeral.

First thing was once the funeral parlor drove the casket to the cemetery's chapel, 8 of us met the hearse at the bottom of the stairs to carry the casket into the chapel where a cart was ready to load the casket so they could wheel it to the front alter. After service ended you do it in reverse to go to the burial plot.

Today's caskets are VERY heavy. I was stunned how much effort I had to put in to lift it up. This was no simply feat of just hanging on. I'm guessing 400-500 pounds.

[Fish]

As pall bearer, it's your responsibility to provide the attendees with liquor shots during the service. You'll want to go and buy yourself a nice big bottle of Fireball, Jager, and Tullamore Dew. A tube of Dixie cups as well. Also best to wear cargo pants, so you can easily dispose of everyone's spent shot cups. The pastor gives you the signal for when to disperse into the crowd and offer drinks, be sure to watch closely.

[SAUTO]

Dunno about that. The weight and awkwardness will surprise you. I have a bunch of older clients. I go to 4-8 funerals a year and have been a Pall Bearer a lot. I think the type of casket is a large variable, the stoutness (age) of the men, and of course the weight of the dead person. If you have to carry the coffin for very long at the grave yard, you have to be wary of the tombstones that are short off the grass. It is awkward as hell. I like to be on the front left...you don't trip on the guys feet in front of you and I am right handed.

All in all, nothing to be really worried about. I appreciate the honor.
I've been a pall beater at least 15 times.

Five times in the last 6 months. From a 400lbr to a guy who couldn't have weighed 100.

There's never been any issues.

[Nickhead]

condolences

Lift with your legs.

fuck that was funny ROFL

[Ming the Merciless]

ive done it....

the one wierd thing is that there were 6 burly dudes and it was heavier than I thought, because I had thought with the 6 of us it would be a feather. But maybe that depends on the casket. I can't really think of anything else remarkable about it, compared to being a best man or something its a piece of cake.

[Miles]

I was worried the same. It's not as much weight to carry as you'd think with 8 people carrying it. Just watch where you step and you're good.

[Perineum Ripper]

It is customary while carrying the casket for one of you carrying it to yell out, "Holy fuck she is alive!" then drop the casket open it up and watch the confetti shoot out..it is a real crowd pleaser

[scho63]

I go to 4-8 funerals a year and have been a Pall Bearer a lot.

Jesus Christ are you the Grim Reaper?!? :eek:

[Buehler445]

Actually, the funeral director is who I'll be relying on. I was worrying about it and then I thought, wait a minute, this is his JOB. He'll tell me what to do.

This. Just listen and do what you're told. First one I ever did I was nervous because I couldn't live with myself if I screwed up.

It's fine. Just do what you're told.

[Bugeater]

This. Just listen and do what you're told. First one I ever did I was nervous because I couldn't live with myself if I screwed up.

It's fine. Just do what you're told.
And shower. Don't forget to shower! And possibly comb your hair as well.

I cannot emphasize this enough.

[otherstar]

Condolences for your loss. I've been a pallbearer several times. Just like the non-smartass responses have said: just listen to the funeral directors and you'll be fine. The casket will be heavier than you think, but not impossible to move.

[listopencil]

Don't forget a pair of dark sunglasses. Might want to grab some spray on insect repellant. Also sunscreen for the back of your neck.

[Rain Man]

I was worried the same. It's not as much weight to carry as you'd think with 8 people carrying it. Just watch where you step and you're good.

I've only borne a pall once, but it was pretty heavy. If you add it up, a 180 pound person with a 100 pound coffin (as a guess), comes out to almost 50 pounds per bearer, and you're carrying it with one hand. I was starting to worry about it as we were walking.

[displacedinMN]

Don't push down.

The reason I say that is because a friend of dads said that to another person while carrying dad.

[BoneKrusher]

Sorry for your Loss, I just lost my Dad on June 22nd.

[bevischief]

Just attach the tow truck and sit back and watch.

[ghak99]

Don't fall in the hole.

[C3HIEF3S]

I was a pallbearer for my grandfather's funeral in January 2016. The employee for the funeral home walked us through everything. Emotionally, it sucks, I was an absolute wreck myself, but that just depends. Physically, it's a piece of cake. At the end of the day it's a life experience, of which not all are supposed to be good.

[Demonpenz]

I was in charge of my unclea funeral who was a marine, I didn't check what mp3's I had on but I was supposed to play amazing grace but Pop that pussy.mp3 was listed as (pop)That pussy.mp3 so it pushed it's way above amazing grace on my sansa

[scho63]

Sorry for your Loss, I just lost my Dad on June 22nd.

Condolences to you and your family. :(

[BlackHelicopters]

Deny any responsibility no matter what happens.

[Hoopsdoc]

Just got her in the ground. It was pretty heavy and very awkward to carry.

Went pretty well all together though. Was a nice service.

[Holladay]

Nice to see that she is in her final resting spot. Being a Pall Bearer is an honor and one you won't forget. Happy things went well.

[FishingRod]

Done it several times.. they will tell you what to do. And yes watch your step if they have flat headstones