How many times do you wack off in a week?

[MrGiggity]

I average about 3-4 times a week.

[Pablo]

I don't have to. With my 4.3 forty and ability to throw a football 75 yards; the wife is so busy giving me blowjobs every 19 minutes that there's nothing left in the twins to wrench out on my own.

[KCrockaholic]

4 times a week, all on Saturdays. Just got done.

[MrGiggity]

I don't have to. With my 4.3 forty and ability to throw a football 75 yards; the wife is so busy giving me blowjobs every 19 minutes that there's nothing left in the twins to wrench out on my own.

You're a lucky man.

[MrGiggity]

4 times a week, all on Saturdays. Just got done.

I prefer to crank em out right before bed. Helps me sleep at night.

[BlackHelicopters]

None. Both my hands have been amputated.

[listopencil]

None. Both my hands have been amputated.

Can't you just cut little flesh pockets in the ends of your arms and fuck the stubs? Sort of a low tech bio med fleshlight.

[listopencil]

Man. I really am a sick fuck, aren't I?

[MrGiggity]

Man. I really am a sick ****, aren't I?

There is no judging in this thread my friend.

[JoeyChuckles]

Every time the Chiefs win a playoff game.

[Kyle DeLexus]

Every time the Chiefs win a playoff game.

Man you've been through some hard times then.

[MrGiggity]

Anyone use hot sauce as lubricant?

[KCrockaholic]

Anyone use hot sauce as lubricant?

The fire sauce from Taco Bell works perfectly for on the go jacking at the mall and shit like that.

[MrGiggity]

The fire sauce from Taco Bell works perfectly for on the go jacking at the mall and shit like that.

Will have to give that a shot. KFC's Finger Lickin Good sauce works wonders.

[eDave]

noneya

[Hog's Gone Fishin]

I retired!

[ROYC75]

Can't you just cut little flesh pockets in the ends of your arms and **** the stubs? Sort of a low tech bio med fleshlight.

ROFL OK, That made me laugh, kinda in a sick fashion but nevertheless, a laugh!

[Why Not?]

Depends on how many women that look up to me are around to watch.

[gblowfish]

Just.......Justa.......Juuuuuuuusta MIIIIINUTE........ and I'll answer you.

[FlaChief58]

You're all gonna go blind and grow hair on your palms!

[Kyle DeLexus]

Depends on how many women that look up to me are around to watch.

Easy there Louis C.K.

[rico]

Man. I really am a sick ****, aren't I?

ROFL I thought it was funny.

[rico]

Depends on how often I am getting laid. Generally I like to get off 2-3 times per day. So...yeah...depends on how often I am getting it. I had sex today at 11:30. Who knows if I'll get another one in there before I go to work tonight.

[BryanBusby]

Anyone use hot sauce as lubricant?
Good protection when fucking strange whores. Just pour that shit allover the hefty bag when you slide it on your tiny tallywacker.

Does a good job as a spermicide and killing off any of that nasty strange whore stds.

[MMXcalibur]

6-8 times a week

[Chiefs4TheWin]

Man you've been through some hard times then.

More like limp times.

[Reerun_KC]

None. Been married 26 years. All I have to do is ask the Mrs.

[cooper barrett]

My SO keeps me taken care of but she's been out of town (in KC) for 2 weeks...the 1/2 Gallon jug of lotion from Sam's need a redo.

[BWillie]

None. Been married 26 years. All I have to do is ask the Mrs.

Sounds like too much work.

[Reerun_KC]

Sounds like too much work.



Easy peasy

[suzzer99]

How often does leebrownusa post in the Pictures forum? About that.

[Titty Meat]

20

[ARROW2]

You're all gonna go blind and grow hair on your palms!



But you will have a healthy prostate. Look it up. LOL




Well, when I am done with my avi and her two cousins at the same time....I have nothing left. :D

[scho63]

I average about 3-4 times a week.

Amateur!

Just like brushing my teeth, 2-3 times a day everyday. :D

All the ex-girlfriends used to get mad knowing I would do it right in the bed next to them if she didn't want to have sex.

[scho63]

I prefer to crank em out right before bed. Helps me sleep at night.

You need to put this in all the recent sleeping threads and help eDave get a good nights sleep! :clap:

[scho63]

I retired!

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/db/20/9d/db209d5d91293381061deea13fcfb58c.jpg

https://media.istockphoto.com/vectors/cartoon-pig-crying-vector-id821532564

https://previews.123rf.com/images/bolsunova/bolsunova1605/bolsunova160500087/56864588-Vector-Stock-Illustration-isolated-Emoji-character-cartoon-Pig--Stock-Photo.jpg

https://st2.depositphotos.com/2405719/11022/v/950/depositphotos_110223732-stock-illustration-isolated-emoji-character-cartoon-sad.jpg

[Prison Bitch]

None. Been married 26 years. All I have to do is ask the Mrs.

Liar. So stupid.

[Titty Meat]

Anyone wanna get on Skype and see who can cum first?

[Easy 6]

I am only authorized to tell you its never standard style

Its proprietary, I have a patent on it

[Lex Luthor]

Anyone wanna get on Skype and see who can cum first?

Dude. Stop acting so gay.

[Titty Meat]

Dude. Stop acting so gay.

What's wrong with being gay Lex Loser?

[kjwood75nro]

None. Been married 26 years. All I have to do is ask the Mrs.
Mrs is short for mistress.

[TinyEvel]

4 times, but I always ask myself permission before I do.

[ThaVirus]

All the ex-girlfriends used to get mad knowing I would do it right in the bed next to them if she didn't want to have sex.

Well, yeah. That's just fucking barbaric.

At least have the decency to go to the bathroom or something, you cretin.

[Pablo]

Well, yeah. That's just fucking barbaric.

At least have the decency to go to the bathroom or something, you cretin.You just want them to get a whiff of the mushroom soup they missed out on. Could have made this for you but now I guess it's into this sock.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

That is pretty weird

[Munson]

I average about 3-4 times a week.

https://i.imgur.com/x9dUvCu.jpg

[Pablo]

Scho C.K.

[Rausch]

4 times, but I always ask myself permission before I do.

What if you have MPD?

What if you start throwing yogurt and a 10 year old personality takes over?...:eek:

[wazu]

Well, yeah. That's just fucking barbaric.

At least have the decency to go to the bathroom or something, you cretin.

Awful judgy for a masturbation thread.

[scho63]

Scho C.K.

ROFLROFLROFLROFLROFL

I just don't tell jokes at the same time!

[scho63]

Well, yeah. That's just fucking barbaric.

At least have the decency to go to the bathroom or something, you cretin.

Trying to guilt them into changing their minds.....:D

[Prison Bitch]

None. Been married 26 years. All I have to do is ask the Mrs.

I wanna again call out this lying idiot^^^^


There is 0%....I repeat 0%...chance he never jerked off the last 26 years. A biological impossibility. He needs to be dogpiled for acting like a tool.


Women have periods. You know, those events that last an entire week. They have pregnancies, hormone changes, post-delivery pain, problems with their moms and co workers and sisters (and yeah: you).


The idea a married guy goes from age 20-50 never jerking off in all those downtomes, is beyond f**** absurd.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

It was Grandpa's cough syrup talking, Bitch

[RINGLEADER]

Every time the Chiefs win a playoff game.

Do playoff bye weeks count?

[RINGLEADER]

I wanna again call out this lying idiot^^^^


There is 0%....I repeat 0%...chance he never jerked off the last 26 years. A biological impossibility. He needs to be dogpiled for acting like a tool.


Women have periods. You know, those events that last an entire week. They have pregnancies, hormone changes, post-delivery pain, problems with their moms and co workers and sisters (and yeah: you).


The idea a married guy goes from age 20-50 never jerking off in all those downtomes, is beyond f**** absurd.

Perhaps his wife does all the hard work? Could explain her large biceps.

[Pasta Little Brioni]

Guarentee we have a few cucks on here that do so from the closet a few times a week.

[WilliamTheIrish]

I wanna again call out this lying idiot^^^^


There is 0%....I repeat 0%...chance he never jerked off the last 26 years. A biological impossibility. He needs to be dogpiled for acting like a tool.


Women have periods. You know, those events that last an entire week. They have pregnancies, hormone changes, post-delivery pain, problems with their moms and co workers and sisters (and yeah: you).


The idea a married guy goes from age 20-50 never jerking off in all those downtomes, is beyond f**** absurd.


It's reeerunnz. He's a pathological idiot.

[wazu]

I wanna again call out this lying idiot^^^^


There is 0%....I repeat 0%...chance he never jerked off the last 26 years. A biological impossibility. He needs to be dogpiled for acting like a tool.


Women have periods. You know, those events that last an entire week. They have pregnancies, hormone changes, post-delivery pain, problems with their moms and co workers and sisters (and yeah: you).


The idea a married guy goes from age 20-50 never jerking off in all those downtomes, is beyond f**** absurd.

He may just have a really low sex drive.

[Reerun_KC]

It's reeerunnz. He's a pathological idiot.

It’s okay buddy. You live.

[Reerun_KC]

I wanna again call out this lying idiot^^^^


There is 0%....I repeat 0%...chance he never jerked off the last 26 years. A biological impossibility. He needs to be dogpiled for acting like a tool.


Women have periods. You know, those events that last an entire week. They have pregnancies, hormone changes, post-delivery pain, problems with their moms and co workers and sisters (and yeah: you).


The idea a married guy goes from age 20-50 never jerking off in all those downtomes, is beyond f**** absurd.
You sad?

[Reerun_KC]

Perhaps his wife does all the hard work? Could explain her large biceps.

Exactly. Why whack it if she will or you can have sex with your Mrs?

[Kyle DeLexus]

4 times, but I always ask myself permission before I do.

Were you ever drunk? You can't legally give yourself permission if intoxicated.