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View Full Version : Science Quantum-Phased Housing is the next big thing in real estate


Hammock Parties
07-06-2021, 11:19 AM
I had a really weird dream last night and I'm convinced it was communicating the next revolution in the housing market.

In the dream, I was renting a house somewhere in downtown KC. It was a two-story job, with the upper story reserved for other tenants. It was, however, unoccupied.

I managed to jimmy the lock to the upstairs and went exploring. Oh, this is very cool, I thought. Since no one lives here, I could just unlock this door as I see fit and have big parties that extend to the upper floor. The landlord would be none the wiser. This is going to be a real party house!

As I continued to check out the secondary part of the property, I found a stairwell leading to the back porch. The lower part of the house did not have an exit to the back porch, so this was an exclusive feature.

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/932OGZakXNE/maxresdefault.jpg

I walked down the stairwell into pitch blackness, save for an illuminated sign that read: CLAP TWICE. I did so, and the lights snapped on, and I opened the back door.

I was expecting to see downtown KC but instead: trees, grass, a river, mountains in the distance...this looked like a completely different part of the country. What the hell?!

The back porch was quantum-phased. Apparently, all you have to do at this place is clap your hands twice at the back door and it opens to another part of the country. Walking back through the door phases you back into Kansas City.

I'm not sure how exactly I figured it out in the dream, but I ascertained I was just northwest of Anchorage, Alaska by looking at a map. And sure enough, there it is: Alexander Creek King's Lodge (https://www.kingslodge.org/).

https://i.imgur.com/qTpVjht.png

And this is what it looks like:

https://i.imgur.com/hPOEGQR.png

By jove, trees, grass, a river, mountains in the distance. My dream was very real. It was a vision of the future.

Imagine living anywhere in the world, and you can have a portion of your residence quantum-phased to another part. Think of the possibilities!

You could have a house in New York, enjoying all the businesses and entertainment opportunities, and the rooftop patio leads to California so you don't freeze in the winter.

Or maybe you want to live in a quiet part of the country for retirement, but your basement is quantum-phased to take you to London when you want to do a bit of shopping. No matter where you live, your dating pool can be expanded! As soon as we get to another planet, we just quantum phase a door and we have instant space travel!

I know you think this is all bullshit, but this is all definitely happening, and I have proof.

CERN meets quantum technology

https://home.cern/news/news/computing/cern-meets-quantum-technology

The CERN Quantum Technology Initiative (QTI), which was announced by CERN Director-General Fabiola Gianotti in June, sees CERN join a rapidly-growing global effort to bring about a “second quantum revolution” – whereby phenomena such as superposition and entanglement, which enable an object to be in two places at the same time or to influence another instantaneously, are exploited to build new computing, communication, sensing and simulation devices.

Yep, we have the technology. We just need to implement it. Soon, you'll be able to Quantum Phase any part of your house as if you're adding a solar panel to the roof. In fact, if you live in perpetual darkness in Antarctica, QUANTUM PHASE YOUR ROOF to anywhere with sun so you can use solar panels.

One issue I can foresee is taxes. If you own property that is quantum-phased, do you have to disclose it publicly, like mold? Do you have to pay taxes in both locations? Surely the owner of the property in the other location is already paying taxes, so you shouldn't have to.

We definitely don't want the government getting involved in this and double dipping. Imagine criminals taking advantage of quantum housing. The only people who should know about this are the buyer and the seller. If every piece of quantum real estate is public knowledge, the price is going to skyrocket, and BlackRock will own it all. No thank you.

As I stood in Alaska thinking about how fun it would be to enjoy my quantum-phased back porch, where I could let the dog run around Alaska if he got too bored, or go down to the river to fish, a Grizzly bear started walking out of the woods. This immediately made me think how careful I was going to have to be - not only the dog, but I wouldn't want to leave food out here and have Quantum Grizzlies phasing back into Kansas City.

I walked back inside and closed the door and watched the bear walk across the grass, and then he morphed into a very large human and decided he wanted to check out the place.

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FAxfmm0rFiE/maxresdefault.jpg

Quantum Grizzly knocked on my door, and I let him in. I gave him a tour of the place and he decided he wanted to be the upstairs tenant. I hope he lets me throw parties, or at the very least doesn't eat me. Maybe I should quantum phase the door to the first story of the house so it opens to hell. (https://www.washburn.edu/cas/art/cyoho/archive/KStravel/stull/)

By the way, this thread is quantum phased, so you may see the rest of it somewhere el

Peter Gibbons
07-06-2021, 11:46 AM
You’re definitely taking something stronger than zzzz-quil at night.
I’d suggest that selling this stuff to others will be more lucrative short term than trying to develop quantum housing.

KC_Lee
07-06-2021, 12:59 PM
Unless Dr. Sam Beckett shows up at some point this whole article is moot.

Rain Man
07-06-2021, 01:15 PM
Will quantum-phased housing destroy the very things that it promises?

For example, I'm going to buy my quantum-phased housing in the cheapest place in America. Everyone will. Therefore, we're going to see housing booms in rural Alaska and North Dakota and Mississippi. Meanwhile, San Francisco and New York are going to collapse because there's no reason to pay a premium for location.

National Parks will become overcrowded and secluded islands will become tourist meccas. Big cities will no longer hold the appeal of scale and rural areas will become vast suburban wastelands. The world will become one big homogeneous place and we shall find neither peace nor stimulation.

Hammock Parties
07-06-2021, 01:34 PM
That's why we don't want this regulated at all.

Quantum-phased housing should pass from generation to generation like an heirloom.

If you sell the house to someone outside your family, it should be discovered like an old safe behind a secret compartment.

The quantum-phased housing market is a lottery. And the winner might get eaten by a grizzly bear.

Besides, what if I'm a rich california scientist with lots of connections in the quantum theory industry, but I hate the outdoors, and want to summer in Asia?

I'm going to pay a premium for quantum housing in LA and Hong Kong.

Bowser
07-06-2021, 02:01 PM
If CERN is involved, you may end up with some prime real estate on Saturn's north pole on that hexagon looking thing there.

Hammock Parties
07-06-2021, 02:10 PM
If CERN is involved, you may end up with some prime real estate on Saturn's north pole on that hexagon looking thing there.

I think aliens actually invented this technology, and we are reverse engineering it.

It's like downloading a trojan horse onto your computer.

The aliens won't need to beam us up, they will just walk into our bedrooms through our quantum backdoors and do as they please.

Eureka
07-06-2021, 02:22 PM
Unless Dr. Sam Beckett shows up at some point this whole article is moot.

https://25.media.tumblr.com/32b229a5daee8f202748db11342b3033/tumblr_moadldWCga1rpd22bo1_400.gif

Peter Gibbons
07-06-2021, 02:27 PM
I think aliens actually invented this technology, and we are reverse engineering it.

It's like downloading a trojan horse onto your computer.

The aliens won't need to beam us up, they will just walk into our bedrooms through our quantum backdoors and do as they please.

This is the basic plot of the “The Long Cosmos” by Terry Pratchett & Steven Baxter. They will count on our curiosity and ambition being our demise.

neech
07-06-2021, 02:41 PM
If part of it is in Kansas City they will make you pay the e-tax on it every year.

Bowser
07-06-2021, 02:42 PM
If part of it is in Kansas City they will make you pay the e-tax on it every year.

Lol, that's no shit

htismaqe
07-06-2021, 02:57 PM
That's why we don't want this regulated at all.

Quantum-phased housing should pass from generation to generation like an heirloom.

If you sell the house to someone outside your family, it should be discovered like an old safe behind a secret compartment.

The quantum-phased housing market is a lottery. And the winner might get eaten by a grizzly bear.

Besides, what if I'm a rich california scientist with lots of connections in the quantum theory industry, but I hate the outdoors, and want to summer in Asia?

I'm going to pay a premium for quantum housing in LA and Hong Kong.

Everybody knows that rich scientists from California go to Bangkok, not Hong Kong.

wheeler08
07-06-2021, 03:05 PM
You’ve come a long way from your moms basement!

Rain Man
07-06-2021, 03:32 PM
That's why we don't want this regulated at all.

Quantum-phased housing should pass from generation to generation like an heirloom.

If you sell the house to someone outside your family, it should be discovered like an old safe behind a secret compartment.

The quantum-phased housing market is a lottery. And the winner might get eaten by a grizzly bear.

Besides, what if I'm a rich california scientist with lots of connections in the quantum theory industry, but I hate the outdoors, and want to summer in Asia?

I'm going to pay a premium for quantum housing in LA and Hong Kong.

I figure this goes one of two ways.

Option A is that the government heavily regulates it to prevent adverse effects like zebra mussel spread and heavy foot traffic on Grand Canyon trails. A limited number of quantum-phased locations is allowed based on desired traffic flow, and they're bid out. Large corporations quickly control the market for the popular destinations, and maybe you have some independents who control the market for places like the slums of Bogota and Pierre, South Dakota. It's not allowed in houses and you have to go to the sites, which are located in abandoned airports.

Option B is that it goes full free market. Everyone can have one as long as they can afford it. It'll be expensive so not everyone will have one. You'll have some commercial ones available for a fee, of course, and houses will either keep them private or sell access like the airbnb model. But most will keep them private because most people aren't entrepreneurial.

Hammock Parties
07-06-2021, 03:42 PM
You’ve come a long way from your moms basement!

That's how I got out of there. I discovered a quantum-phased computer chair when I replaced the old one.

When I sat in it, I was transported to the upper deck at Arrowhead Stadium. I'm not saying which section or seat. It's not even there most likely because they replaced most of the seats. And sold them. Who knows where that plastic is now.

Also each quantum-phase portal has an activation sequence. Sometimes you just clap twice. Sometimes you post tens of thousands of times online.