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seclark
01-15-2024, 12:26 PM
So I’ve got a little cabin fever from being inside for the last few days. So I hop in the truck and ride through the country roads up to the c-store for a few boxes of nicotine pouches. Once I get to the blacktop, it’s solid ice, so I depend on my survival skills.
I reach the store and get my supplies and head home. About a mile south there’s a car that’s stuck in the middle of the road on the hill, can’t go anywhere. Two vehicles behind it in front of me. The first car goes to pass it and meets another suv coming his way!
Bad deal
The car makes it, but the suv fucks around and winds in the ditch to my left. Lady driver is sitting there with a cigarette in her maw with a death grip on her steering wheel. I’m thinking she’s lucky she didn’t rollover.
So the truck in front of me opens up 3 doors and a bunch of Amish boys jump out. One runs up to the top of the hill and starts directing traffic, while 4 more run over to the suv and start hollering to the lady inside. It didn’t appear to me that she was going to roll down her window or put out her cigarette, so I felt like I was ok to observe the bearded man at the top of the hill, and pass the two vehicles to continue my way home.
I did tell my wife to take care when she goes to town to get groceries later.
sec

Sassy Squatch
01-15-2024, 12:29 PM
https://i.makeagif.com/media/5-25-2018/sf_KZ3.gif

ptlyon
01-15-2024, 12:32 PM
Living in Iowa ain't for cowards.

That said, Amish kids in a truck? C'mon sec... What were in those pouches? ROFL

ptlyon
01-15-2024, 12:38 PM
That goes for nebraska too

https://www.klkntv.com/watch-man-driving-skid-loader-damages-several-cars-and-lpd-cruiser-at-home-depot/

seclark
01-15-2024, 12:39 PM
Living in Iowa ain't for cowards.

That said, Amish kids in a truck? C'mon sec... What were in those pouches? ROFL

They got drivers, dude.
Take em to work and home again.
sec
But I puffed when I got home to ease the tension.

Titty Meat
01-15-2024, 12:40 PM
Living in Iowa ain't for cowards.

That said, Amish kids in a truck? C'mon sec... What were in those pouches? ROFL

Do you think that's why they are so good at running the ball?

Frazod
01-15-2024, 12:43 PM
I grew up in that area. This was decades ago, but when I was a kid the Amish drove cars/trucks; they just painted them black, including the bumpers and hub caps. It was the Mennonites who still did the horse and buggy bit.

Pinchshot
01-15-2024, 12:51 PM
I hate it when the waves crash onto the road during nor'easters. Just washed my car too dammit.

seclark
01-15-2024, 12:51 PM
The wife had an Amish carpenter build a vanity for my bathroom when she remodeled it. We went to pick it up, and one of the women helped load it up and she was barefoot. She had 6 toes on each feet.
I told my grandson it would be a bitch for her to pull her socks on.
sec

loochy
01-15-2024, 12:55 PM
Amish guys took charge. They ain't no pussies

displacedinMN
01-15-2024, 12:58 PM
We are hearing about black ice.

Caused by exhaust and moisture from exhaust freezing to the roads. Not as bad as other times and years, but not fun.

Brine and salt does not work at these temps. People just need to not be stupid.

seclark
01-15-2024, 01:00 PM
Amish guys took charge. They ain't no pussies

No shit. They work up a lot of deer meat too.
Just wonder what they mix in with it, but it tastes good.
sec

Pepe Silvia
01-15-2024, 01:01 PM
No shit. They work up a lot of deer meat too.
Just wonder what they mix in with it, but it tastes good.
sec

Those amish egg noodles at the store are good too.

TambaBerry
01-15-2024, 01:03 PM
Amish just depend on technology that they can personally fix and maintain.

ptlyon
01-15-2024, 01:23 PM
No shit. They work up a lot of deer meat too.
Just wonder what they mix in with it, but it tastes good.
sec

That's high quality opossum and raccoon

Pasta Little Brioni
01-15-2024, 01:26 PM
Bring Jebidiah and crew back for a MMMMF

IowaHawkeyeChief
01-15-2024, 01:31 PM
I grew up in that area. This was decades ago, but when I was a kid the Amish drove cars/trucks; they just painted them black, including the bumpers and hub caps. It was the Mennonites who still did the horse and buggy bit.

Mennonites can drive, Amish can't.

jerryaldini
01-15-2024, 01:33 PM
Just curious. How do you know if their Mennonite or Amish? I bet there's some good Mennonite and Amish jokes about that.

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 01:37 PM
The wife had an Amish carpenter build a vanity for my bathroom when she remodeled it. We went to pick it up, and one of the women helped load it up and she was barefoot. She had 6 toes on each feet.
I told my grandson it would be a bitch for her to pull her socks on.
sec

So I’ve got a little cabin fever from being inside for the last few days. So I hop in the truck and ride through the country roads up to the c-store for a few boxes of nicotine pouches. Once I get to the blacktop, it’s solid ice, so I depend on my survival skills.
I reach the store and get my supplies and head home. About a mile south there’s a car that’s stuck in the middle of the road on the hill, can’t go anywhere. Two vehicles behind it in front of me. The first car goes to pass it and meets another suv coming his way!
Bad deal
The car makes it, but the suv fucks around and winds in the ditch to my left. Lady driver is sitting there with a cigarette in her maw with a death grip on her steering wheel. I’m thinking she’s lucky she didn’t rollover.
So the truck in front of me opens up 3 doors and a bunch of Amish boys jump out. One runs up to the top of the hill and starts directing traffic, while 4 more run over to the suv and start hollering to the lady inside. It didn’t appear to me that she was going to roll down her window or put out her cigarette, so I felt like I was ok to observe the bearded man at the top of the hill, and pass the two vehicles to continue my way home.
I did tell my wife to take care when she goes to town to get groceries later.
sec

WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

notorious
01-15-2024, 01:38 PM
Mennonites can drive, Amish can't.

Beachy Amish can, and all of the local Mennonites here (a lot) can drive.

There's a mixture of old-school Amish and Beachy around Hutch. I'd put their baking skills on par with the Mennonites. Both A+.

Mephistopheles Janx
01-15-2024, 01:42 PM
Just curious. How do you know if their Mennonite or Amish? I bet there's some good Mennonite and Amish jokes about that.

They are good runners... fuck can they run.

Frazod
01-15-2024, 01:56 PM
Mennonites can drive, Amish can't.

Maybe now, but not 50 years ago in Macon County.

Dunerdr
01-15-2024, 01:57 PM
Solid plan making the wife go out for groceries.

seclark
01-15-2024, 02:07 PM
WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

The house is the wife’s.
She does what she wants with it.
sec

Shiver Me Timbers
01-15-2024, 02:07 PM
Solid plan making the wife go out for groceries.

I think he said he went home and lit one up after he got home. Probably best the wife goes solo.

Rain Man
01-15-2024, 02:12 PM
Mennonites can drive, Amish can't.

It sounds like Amish can passenge, though.

Frosty
01-15-2024, 02:13 PM
The house is the wife’s.
She does what she wants with it.
sec

Don't you know women can't drive safely or swing a hammer? Get with the times, man.

seclark
01-15-2024, 02:14 PM
Solid plan making the wife go out for groceries.
She does that, pays the bills, takes care of the taxes, and gets me to my doctors.
I get my chew and will grab her a soft drink occasionally. Been this way for 43 years. She’s a keeper.
She does make fun of me a lot, but I can handle it.
sec

Rain Man
01-15-2024, 02:14 PM
Amish just depend on technology that they can personally fix and maintain.

Wow. If I was Amish I would starve to death in three weeks. I can't even fix and maintain a flint hand axe.

TLO
01-15-2024, 02:16 PM
WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

*Boomer has entered the chat*

KCUnited
01-15-2024, 02:17 PM
WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

Swing and Amish

Mephistopheles Janx
01-15-2024, 02:22 PM
WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

Dunno about you but I'm extremely attracted to women who can handle themselves rather than dainty delicate flowers.

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loochy
01-15-2024, 02:32 PM
WTF is this shit?
You should be taking your wife to work and picking her up so that she doesn't have to drive in those conditions.
Your wife did the remodel? Again that is the husband's place to either do or make sure that it is all taken care of.

You know that women are capable of doing stuff, right? They're just physically weaker.

seclark
01-15-2024, 02:35 PM
It was 12below yesterday and the pipes were frozen under the snow where the septic tank drained out over the hill in the woods in back of the house. It started smelling kinda funky, so I pulled on my coveralls and my winter coat, went over to the garage and grabbed a pick then headed down there.
Well I found the drains and cleaned them out, but the cancer started kicking in and I went down and couldn’t get back up again. Wound up leaving the pick and crawling on my hands and knees all the way back to the house. Got to the back porch and was able to pull myself up to the door and get inside.
Shucked my warmies off and made to my recliner. Wife asked me why I didn’t call her to come help, I don’t know. Pretty sure I could make it.
Smells better in the house now.
sec

Hog Rider
01-15-2024, 02:40 PM
*Boomer has entered the chat*

Boomers were the Equal Rights Amendment/ burn your bra crowd.
Keep up.

displacedinMN
01-15-2024, 02:41 PM
SEC. you need to never do that again

KS Smitty
01-15-2024, 02:54 PM
SEC. you need to never do that again

^^^^THIS^^^^

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 02:54 PM
The house is the wife’s.
She does what she wants with it.
sec

Are you not very handy around the house?

Is she the better driver as well?



Just busting balls man. :p

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 02:56 PM
She does that, pays the bills, takes care of the taxes, and gets me to my doctors.
I get my chew and will grab her a soft drink occasionally. Been this way for 43 years. She’s a keeper.
She does make fun of me a lot, but I can handle it.
sec

Sounds like you are the "trophy" husband.....

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 02:58 PM
*Boomer has entered the chat*

Gen X thank you very much.
Women still like men who will open their doors, make sure their vehicles are always full of fuel, get them flowers for no reason, make them dinner, and do the dishes.

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 02:59 PM
Dunno about you but I'm extremely attracted to women who can handle themselves rather than dainty delicate flowers.

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They are hot but far too often they don't like men.

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 03:01 PM
You know that women are capable of doing stuff, right? They're just physically weaker.

They are very capable of doing many things. Doesn't that they always want to though.

Those in the vids that Mephistopheles Janx posted might not be physically weaker than a lot of men.

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 03:02 PM
It was 12below yesterday and the pipes were frozen under the snow where the septic tank drained out over the hill in the woods in back of the house. It started smelling kinda funky, so I pulled on my coveralls and my winter coat, went over to the garage and grabbed a pick then headed down there.
Well I found the drains and cleaned them out, but the cancer started kicking in and I went down and couldn’t get back up again. Wound up leaving the pick and crawling on my hands and knees all the way back to the house. Got to the back porch and was able to pull myself up to the door and get inside.
Shucked my warmies off and made to my recliner. Wife asked me why I didn’t call her to come help, I don’t know. Pretty sure I could make it.
Smells better in the house now.
sec

Hmmm, are you serious or???

Easy 6
01-15-2024, 03:04 PM
Sounds like you are the "trophy" husband.....

He's battling cancer, you fucking momo

KS Smitty
01-15-2024, 03:04 PM
Hmmm, are you serious or???

Do you even pay attention to what others say or have said for the last year+?

ChiefsCountry
01-15-2024, 03:13 PM
Just curious. How do you know if their Mennonite or Amish? I bet there's some good Mennonite and Amish jokes about that.

Amish have a beard but no mustache

Easy 6
01-15-2024, 03:15 PM
What is every Amish womans fantasy?

Three Mennonite!

Pepe Silvia
01-15-2024, 03:21 PM
What is every Amish womans fantasy?

Three Mennonite!

I'll give you a clue, its round, it has three holes and you stick your fingers through it.

Easy 6
01-15-2024, 03:24 PM
I'll give you a clue, its round, it has three holes and you stick your fingers through it.

Ok lets hear it...

stevieray
01-15-2024, 03:31 PM
It was 12below yesterday and the pipes were frozen under the snow where the septic tank drained out over the hill in the woods in back of the house. It started smelling kinda funky, so I pulled on my coveralls and my winter coat, went over to the garage and grabbed a pick then headed down there.
Well I found the drains and cleaned them out, but the cancer started kicking in and I went down and couldn’t get back up again. Wound up leaving the pick and crawling on my hands and knees all the way back to the house. Got to the back porch and was able to pull myself up to the door and get inside.
Shucked my warmies off and made to my recliner. Wife asked me why I didn’t call her to come help, I don’t know. Pretty sure I could make it.
Smells better in the house now.
sec

^cut from a different cloth^


:rockon:

Iowanian
01-15-2024, 04:24 PM
I’m not an Amish fan but I’m a sec fan.

Glad no one got hurt in the crash and you didn’t freeze in a septic tank eruption when you got that frozen turd knocked out of the money tube.

srvy
01-15-2024, 04:26 PM
Dunno about you but I'm extremely attracted to women who can handle themselves rather than dainty delicate flowers.

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<blockquote class="tiktok-embed" cite="https://www.tiktok.com/@nicole_coenen/video/7316220023901539589" data-video-id="7316220023901539589" style="max-width: 605px;min-width: 325px;" > <section> <a target="_blank" title="@nicole_coenen" href="https://www.tiktok.com/@nicole_coenen?refer=embed">@nicole_coenen</a> <p>A few speed rounds ����</p> <a target="_blank" title="♬ original sound - Nicole Maple Coenen" href="https://www.tiktok.com/music/original-sound-7316220037535992581?refer=embed">♬ original sound - Nicole Maple Coenen</a> </section> </blockquote> <script async src="https://www.tiktok.com/embed.js"></script>

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/67/Bar_of_Irish_Spring_deodorant_soap.JPG
Plus
https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/71rrBkdzDiL._AC_UF1000,1000_QL80_.jpg

Iowanian
01-15-2024, 04:31 PM
He is rumored to have a hammer head bigger than a bell pepper. That’s why he doesn’t have to mop the floor like you, Cinderella.

Are you not very handy around the house?

Is she the better driver as well?



Just busting balls man. :p

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 04:52 PM
He is rumored to have a hammer head bigger than a bell pepper. That’s why he doesn’t have to mop the floor like you, Cinderella.

ROFL

Chief Roundup
01-15-2024, 04:54 PM
He's battling cancer, you fucking momo

Do you even pay attention to what others say or have said for the last year+?

Had no idea. I am not here all the time. I come and go. If it was not "stickied" in a thread it is unlikely that I would have seen it.

Smed1065
01-15-2024, 05:02 PM
Maybe now, but not 50 years ago in Macon County. Macon County Line. :)

BigRedChief
01-15-2024, 05:03 PM
The wife had an Amish carpenter build a vanity for my bathroom when she remodeled it. We went to pick it up, and one of the women helped load it up and she was barefoot. She had 6 toes on each feet.
I told my grandson it would be a bitch for her to pull her socks on.
secTake care of yourself. I’d like for you to keep hanging around. :thumb:

Frazod
01-15-2024, 05:09 PM
Macon County Line. :)

Not the same Macon County. :D

Rain Man
01-15-2024, 05:14 PM
They are good runners... fuck can they run.

Are they running from something or chasing something?

Iowanian
01-15-2024, 05:16 PM
That’s not even the odd part…..how does she hand sew panties with room for 2 camel toes…


The wife had an Amish carpenter build a vanity for my bathroom when she remodeled it. We went to pick it up, and one of the women helped load it up and she was barefoot. She had 6 toes on each feet.
I told my grandson it would be a bitch for her to pull her socks on.
sec

booger
01-15-2024, 05:55 PM
It was 12below yesterday and the pipes were frozen under the snow where the septic tank drained out over the hill in the woods in back of the house. It started smelling kinda funky, so I pulled on my coveralls and my winter coat, went over to the garage and grabbed a pick then headed down there.
Well I found the drains and cleaned them out, but the cancer started kicking in and I went down and couldn’t get back up again. Wound up leaving the pick and crawling on my hands and knees all the way back to the house. Got to the back porch and was able to pull myself up to the door and get inside.
Shucked my warmies off and made to my recliner. Wife asked me why I didn’t call her to come help, I don’t know. Pretty sure I could make it.
Smells better in the house now.
sec

Take notes youngsters. Sec is a man leading by example. Glad it turned out well bud! Did you grunt like Tim the tool man Taylor when you got to the recliner?

booger
01-15-2024, 06:09 PM
Nothing like freshly sawed oak or hickory to remind a man of floppy Amish cooter

booger
01-15-2024, 06:14 PM
That’s not even the odd part…..how does she hand sew panties with room for 2 camel toes…

Amish women have passed down the tradition of exfoliating their snappers with burlap washcloths for ages

Katipan
01-15-2024, 06:26 PM
Everyone has already said all the things Sec. ❤️
Except, do you have a brother?

scho63
01-15-2024, 06:50 PM
The moral of the story: don't stop smoking cigarettes

Bob Dole
01-15-2024, 07:02 PM
I opened the back door to let the dog out twice and that was the extent of my outdooring today. I’ve been in TX 30 years and am not used to this shit any more.

Shiver Me Timbers
01-15-2024, 08:28 PM
I opened the back door to let the dog out twice and that was the extent of my outdooring today. I’ve been in TX 30 years and am not used to this shit any more.

My friend is a home builder down between Houston and Austin. He said he won't see his crews for the rest of the week. One of the lead guys said they are all planning on staying at home INSIDE. Same guys who wear hoodies when it is 80 outside

Mike in SW-MO
01-15-2024, 09:06 PM
No shit. They work up a lot of deer meat too.
Just wonder what they mix in with it, but it tastes good.
sec

Just got a call. Mine is ready to pick up.

seclark
01-15-2024, 09:06 PM
Everyone has already said all the things Sec. ❤️
Except, do you have a brother?

Had.
Died 3 years ago.
sec

jerryaldini
01-15-2024, 09:16 PM
What is every Amish womans fantasy?

Three Mennonite!

ROFL

displacedinMN
01-15-2024, 09:24 PM
My friend is a home builder down between Houston and Austin. He said he won't see his crews for the rest of the week. One of the lead guys said they are all planning on staying at home INSIDE. Same guys who wear hoodies when it is 80 outside

those people would have fingers fall off in minnesota

Frazod
01-15-2024, 09:27 PM
those people would have fingers fall off in minnesota

I have a friend who lives in Chisholm up in the iron range. He told me stories about the brutal conditions up there in the winter, but how folks are just used to it and go about their lives.

displacedinMN
01-15-2024, 09:49 PM
I have a friend who lives in Chisholm up in the iron range. He told me stories about the brutal conditions up there in the winter, but how folks are just used to it and go about their lives.

I always say it takes a while to get used to your surroundings.

Cold, you have to build up that layer of fat and let that skin thicken up. I have a co worker from Jamaica. She still cant stand the cold. I am sure her kids will be fine.

Also, mind over matter.

I hate the heat, but I can handle it if I have some shade.