B-17 #3 Dreamsicle

[big nasty kcnut]

The name of our bird has officially been sanctioned as

Dreamsicle

This is our official noseart

http://www.airrepairinc.com/templates/downloads/MVC-004S.JPG


Captain: Vlad Logicslav

At ease.

Copilot memyselfi (AWOL)
Bombardier Hoover
Navigator The Bad Guy
Engineer JimNasium
Radio Op. BigChiefDave
Tail Gunner kcnut
Ball Turret Gunner Ecto-I
Right Waist Gunner Warrior5
Left Waist Gunner cntrygal

[JimNasium]

Nah, you're just asking for bad luck with that name. Logical's the pilot, it's his plane, he should name her. You'll be comforted to know that I am the engineer on this rig. Does anyone know where the dipstick is? Does this thing take regular, unleaded or ethyl?

[ChiefJustice]

Does anyone know where the dipstick is?


That is as loaded as a question on this thread could get. :)

[Warrior5]

Aircraft #3 (Look for the plane with the "Give peace a chance" bumper sticker.)

Pilot Logical
Copilot memyselfi
Bombardier Hoover
Navigator The Bad Guy
Engineer JimNasium
Radio Op. BigChiefDave
Tail Gunner kcnut
Ball Turret Gunner Ecto-I
Right Waist Gunner Warrior5
Left Waist Gunner cntrygal

Logical is flying this bird, with Denise as copilot? (we'll never get off the ground, or someone is going to get murdered in the cockpit. Pending the upcoming court martial, I believe Jim, as the top turret gunner/engineer, better be prepared to get behind the controls)

Hoover as bombardier? (he gets to yell "bombs away", and that simply sucks)

kcnut as tail gunner? (pilot to tail gunner; say again. Say Again!)

me and cntrygal manning the waist? (good call; you got two soldiers manning the .50s).

Ecto-I as ball turret gunner? (sucks to be you, man!)



...checking the headspace and timing on his M2.

[ChiefJustice]

kcnut as tail gunner? (pilot to tail gunner; say again. Say Again!)


Rep for that :LOL:


This has to be the funniest ship in the fleet!!

[Warrior5]

I don't want KC-B-17 Aircraft #3 Stalker showing up and screwing around with our comms.

[Hoover]

yeeeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Lets blow some $hit Up!

[Abba-Dabba]

Did you guys hear that they expect a 95% plane casualty rate. Which 95% do you guys think you will end up?

[Dartgod]

Denise is your co-pilot? May I suggest this for the name of your plane?

http://www.303rdbga.com/na-witchestit.jpg

[RNR]

Denise is your co-pilot? May I suggest this for the name of your plane?

http://www.303rdbga.com/na-witchestit.jpg
:eek: ROFL

[Hoover]

I agree, I love it!

[big nasty kcnut]

I would be the kansas farmboy who got great hunting skills so that why they have me in the back.

[Warrior5]

Say again tailgunner? Hold on, I'm coming back there to check your intercom.

[Phobia]

WTF is going on here?

~JimNasium is slacking and Warrior5 has me in stitches.

[Warrior5]

That's what I want to know...who's in the cockpit? Where's the other waist gunner (Cntrygal)? Obviously the O2 supply to TSGT kcnut is malfunctioning (along with his intercom), so no one is watching our 6.

And who let you on this aircraft? CPT Logical is gonna kick your butt when he finds out.


...just the token waist gunner.

[Phobia]

That's what I want to know...who's in the cockpit? Where's the other waist gunner (Cntrygal)? Obviously the O2 supply to TSGT kcnut is malfunctioning (along with his intercom), so no one is watching our 6.

And who let you on this aircraft? CPT Logical is gonna kick your butt when he finds out.


...just the token waist gunner.

I'm just inspecting the rig (ie: stealing your beer). I think I know where the other waist gunner is, though. She's wasted, quite literally, at the bar. She's quite the party soldier.

I kinda assumed the tail gunner had been mortally wounded.

[Warrior5]

My whole crew is AWOL, we ain't got a plane name yet, we don't have our nose art done, we got a pacifist Raider fan for a co-pilot, and Phobia is walking around the plane trying to steal parts for his wreck.

[Phobia]

I don't want anybody to say "Phobia's unhelpful". With that in mind, here are my submissions for your plane name:
gochiefs
Slayer Disabled
sofeisty
AmericanHero
Robinson's Excuso
and
Pillowbiters Exthpreth

[JimNasium]

My whole crew is AWOL, we ain't got a plane name yet, we don't have our nose art done, we got a pacifist Raider fan for a co-pilot, and Phobia is walking around the plane trying to steal parts for his wreck. Sorry, I'm still trying to find the ignition switch. Last I saw of Logical he was loading his jeep with a seabag and a shovel. Denise is no where to be found. :hmmm:

[Warrior5]

That explains that loud "gong" sound I heard, followed by a loud thump. No wonder I couldn't find the shovel.

What do you want to name this bird, anyway?

Keep an eye on Phobia; he's cannibalizing parts. I'm going to check on Ecto-I...I saw him crawling into his ball turret with something rolled up in his hand.

[Abba-Dabba]

My whole crew is AWOL, we ain't got a plane name yet, we don't have our nose art done, we got a pacifist Raider fan for a co-pilot, and Phobia is walking around the plane trying to steal parts for his wreck.

WTF are you calling wreck? I'll have you know that we keep that plane fine tuned like a Kretuzer Stradivarius violin. Don't mind he half eaten Burger King cheeseburger, the empty Krispy Kreme boxes and the porno mags with no covers that are strewn under the pilots seat.

[Phobia]

WTF are you calling wreck? I'll have you know that we keep that plane fine tuned like a Kretuzer Stradivarius violin. Don't mind he half eaten Burger King cheeseburger, the empty Krispy Kreme boxes and the porno mags with no covers that are strewn under the pilots seat.

I was framed.... by my co-pilot.... whoever in the heck that is. Yeah. Framed.

[big nasty kcnut]

Don't question my readiness i'll be knocking down krauts faster then their blitzkrig fly across france.

[Logical]

My first decree is that Denise is AWOL and we are looking for a recruit to replace her. I suggest that Warrior5 go on a recruiting mission to bring in Jenny Gump.

[Warrior5]

Suggest? What kinda milk-toast boss are you, anyway. Take charge of this aircraft, and start directing. Recommend you start by asking the tail gunner WTH a "blitzkrig fly" is

I'm enroute to recruit, er...LT Jenny Gump.

[Logical]

Suggest? What kinda milk-toast boss are you, anyway. Take charge of this aircraft, and start directing. Recommend you start by asking the tail gunner WTH a "blitzkrig fly" is

I'm enroute to recruit, er...LT Jenny Gump.


With kcnut on board we never need to worry about encryption. I have requisitioned decoder rings. Carry on.

[big nasty kcnut]

i'll be knocking down krauts faster then their blitzkrig can fly across france. that what i ment to say.

[Jenny Gump]

Suggest? What kinda milk-toast boss are you, anyway. Take charge of this aircraft, and start directing. Recommend you start by asking the tail gunner WTH a "blitzkrig fly" is

I'm enroute to recruit, er...LT Jenny Gump.

I'm the fifth backup crew member. Looks like you can't have me til the 2nd or 3rd mission. Standing by and ready.

Over.

[Logical]

Jenny

I will check with central command reporting that Crewmember Denise is absent without leave and request your assignment as her replacement.

[Jenny Gump]

Jenny

I will check with central command reporting that Crewmember Denise is absent without leave and request your assignment as her replacement.

That would be greeaat.
BTW, do we have a name for our bomber yet?
I like dreamsicle. Of course, it doesn't sound very intimidating, but I think our crew is man enough, oh yeah... and woman enough to handle it.
http://www.airrepairinc.com/templates/downloads/MVC-004S.JPG

[Logical]

That would be greeaat.
BTW, do we have a name for our bomber yet?
I like dreamsicle. Of course, it doesn't sound very intimidating, but I think our crew is man enough, oh yeah... and woman enough to handle it.
http://www.airrepairinc.com/templates/downloads/MVC-004S.JPG


Woot woot we have a name!!! Excellent

[big nasty kcnut]

we have a winner.

[big nasty kcnut]

also i'm practicing my hand to hand combat skill if we need to fight any nazi or french on land.

[Hoover]

When do I get to blow crap up.

[Logical]

OK troops I have finished your pre-combat fitness reports so listen up.

Copilot memyselfi - Skated through training with verbal skills that confused and confounded the top brass. Prior to reporting to station she disappeared and I had to report her Absent WithOut Leave. An unconfirmed report has her chasing Rommel VonGannon across country as he seeks to forget the intercepted communiques he was responsible for in the Germans biggest battle of the year. Rumors are he and his men are so disconsolate his army has collapsed and commanding general was relieved of command due to a revolt. All nominated officers for the command are turning down the promotion and VonGannon is seeking to be relieved of his commission to join the Italian command. Denise is seeking him out supposedly to console. If she succeeds we will be forced to court martial her for aiding and abetting the enemy.

Bombardier Hoover - Hoover went on a drunken binge then reported back spouting some nonsense about leading Platoon Sgt Kerry to victory in Iowa. He is coming around now screaming about he wants to blow crap up. This is the kind of attitude I expected from the Bissel master.

Navigator The Bad Guy - Lost already, WTF is up with that we have not even left the ground. I was told that this young lad had a temper and could be led off course if not kept focused. I will need to work on that.

Engineer JimNasium - Nasium is a trooper but his sense of humor is missing in action and we cannot get rid of that little dog that keeps following him around. He keeps mumbling that he wants to be called Davey but he is sort of wooden so I think I will just call him Blockhead.

Radio Op. BigChiefDave - Belligerant and tough he keeps yelling silence to our tail gunner and telling me that we are all in trouble if we do not teach him how to communicate. Sparky as I now call Dave is a great Wizzo but I will have to remind him who is in command fairly often well as soon as he gets out of that cat house.

Tail Gunner kcnut - You have all heard of the Windtalkers with the Army and how successful they have been. Well we have our own man with a unique language Mr Nut or Nutjob for short. I cancelled the order for encryption gear and instead just requisitioned decoder rings for my crew. Nutjob is enthusiatic and keeps talking about how he is faster than a Blitzkrieg fly whatever the f*ck that is, I believe he was dropped on his head at birth but he works hard and he makes us laugh.

Ball Turret Gunner Ecto-I - Ecto is kind of ghostly and fades in and out but is no apparition when he is on he scares the shit out of others. I just wish he would clean up that gooey shit he leaves everywhere he goes.

Right Waist Gunner Warrior5 - Dude is hard core Army, how he ever ended up in this mans Army Air corp is anyones guess but he is dead nuts with his gun and sprays his shots liberally. He is good with the 50 caliber as well.

Left Waist Gunner cntrygal - First in her training class who would have known she was such a party animal. She has been drunk since we arrived in country and has hit on every swinging dick in this mans Army Air Corp. I know we can rely on her to lay em dead.

[Warrior5]

kcnut is our own personal Windtalker...hilarious! Have you considered switching kcnut to radio operator?

How'd did a straight-shootin' tanker end up in a B-17 you ask? First off, this is the <B>Army</B> Air Corps! Secondly (and most importantly), I got tired off 88 rounds coming through my Sherman at Kasserine Pass (wanna see my scars?).

Keep beating on the Squadron S1 to get LT Gump on board, and please don't ask me to clean up the ball turret. BTW, I know where the quick-release pin is on that thing if it starts getting too heavy.

[big nasty kcnut]

Warrior i want to send nazi to their death i love being tailgunner.

[Warrior5]

The only time I think CPT Logical will bring you up to the radio compartment is when tommykat is calling us.

Just shoot at the planes with the black crosses on the wings.

Also recommend you don't say "I love being a tailgunner" with so much enthusiasm. It comes out, well...it just doesn't sound right.

[Warrior5]

also feel free to shoot at any planes with Donkey emblems on them.

[JimNasium]

Does anyone know where the freaking hood release is on this thing?

[Hoover]

just kick it. The reason we have to fly this crap is because in 60 some years some dude named President Bush will be the reason for all of history's proublems.

[JimNasium]

just kick it. The reason we have to fly this crap is because in 60 some years some dude named President Bush will be the reason for all of history's proublems.You mean George H.W. Bush is gonna be a president? Isn't he a fighter pilot?

[Rain Man]

I'll just vote for whomever General Eisenhower tells me to. I like Ike.

[Hoover]

Yes he will be President, but his son will to, he is the reason we have all these problems.
I Like Ike too!

[Rain Man]

A father and son presidency? C'mon, don't be ridiculous. This isn't the days of Adams and Quincy Adams. American won't stand for a royal family.

[big nasty kcnut]

By the way nobody touches our mini bar ok.

[mlyonsd]

Wow. Nice nose art. Did meme pose for that?

If not I want to volunteer as a transfer once you've been in the air 5 minutes and have voted to throw her out without a chute.

[big nasty kcnut]

mlyonsd get in line and we expect that you pay for the drink during your interview.

[mlyonsd]

mlyonsd get in line and we expect that you pay for the drink during your interview.

"Pay for my drink?"

I'll have you know I'm the best right waist gunner in the business and my reputation at lining up the USO girls is unmatched by anyone in England.

You should be lucky I'm considering your rusty old bucket.

[Jenny Gump]

"Pay for my drink?"

I'll have you know I'm the best right waist gunner in the business and my reputation at lining up the USO girls is unmatched by anyone in England.

You should be lucky I'm considering your rusty old bucket.

Why hire a guy who will "line the girls up" when you could have me ON the plane to begin with? I'm sexy, smart, can follow orders, and I love to cause destruction. For heaven's sake, I found the nose art for our beloved bomber...if Denise get's booted, I'm your soldier. Over.

[big nasty kcnut]

jenny well he behind you as far as getting on this plane sweetie. mlyonsd hey we love to have you but jenny asked to join us first. But we alway looking for new recruits.

[Raiderhater]

I just have to ask this, (it may have already been covered and I missed it) but Dreamsicle? Did Denise get involved with the naming of the bird or something? "We don't want to sound tough and warlike. We want to come across as a plane of love, peace, sugar, spice and all things nice.". All I think about is ice cream when I see the name.


Speaking of which I think I'm going to have a bowl. Mint chocolate chip, Mmmmmm!

[Jenny Gump]

I just have to ask this, (it may have already been covered and I missed it) but Dreamsicle? Did Denise get involved with the naming of the bird or something? "We don't want to sound tough and warlike. We want to come across as a plane of love, peace, sugar, spice and all things nice.". All I think about is ice cream when I see the name.


Speaking of which I think I'm going to have a bowl. Mint chocolate chip, Mmmmmm!

I get what you are saying, but here is the deal...the guys on this bomber are man enough to have an aircraft named The Dreamsicle. It is a sweet, succulent ride through the skies with these boys...and cntrygal of course!

[Raiderhater]

I get what you are saying, but here is the deal...the guys on this bomber are man enough :Pinky: to have an aircraft named The Dreamsicle. It is a sweet, succulent ride through the skies with these boys...and cntrygal of course!

[RedNFeisty]

If nothing else the chick is pretty damn hot!

[Logical]

If nothing else the chick is pretty damn hot!

Besides which who would not want to lick that? :dom:

[Cntrygal]

That's what I want to know...who's in the cockpit? Where's the other waist gunner (Cntrygal)? Obviously the O2 supply to TSGT kcnut is malfunctioning (along with his intercom), so no one is watching our 6.

And who let you on this aircraft? CPT Logical is gonna kick your butt when he finds out.


...just the token waist gunner.


I'm here partner! Let's kick the shit outa someone!!!!!!

[Cntrygal]

Left Waist Gunner cntrygal - First in her training class who would have known she was such a party animal. She has been drunk since we arrived in country and has hit on every swinging dick in this mans Army Air Corp. I know we can rely on her to lay em dead.


:LOL:

[Warrior5]

'Bout time you reported for duty...CPT Logical was about to bring you up on UCMJ for AWOL and missing movement, and I wasn't looking forward to bouncing back and forth between the .50s. Make sure your gear is stowed, and check the headspace and timing on that M2.

And please don't look in the ball turret; it ain't a pretty sight.

[Cntrygal]

'Bout time you reported for duty...CPT Logical was about to bring you up on UCMJ for AWOL and missing movement, and I wasn't looking forward to bouncing back and forth between the .50s. Make sure your gear is stowed, and check the headspace and timing on that M2.

And please don't look in the ball turret; it ain't a pretty sight.


Been working OT, but don't worry.... my gear is ALWAYS ready to go.

Do we need to be extra viligent against sabotage?

[mlyonsd]

jenny well he behind you as far as getting on this plane sweetie. mlyonsd hey we love to have you but jenny asked to join us first. But we alway looking for new recruits.

Hey I'm not stupid. I'd pick her too.

[Skip Towne]

Why hire a guy who will "line the girls up" when you could have me ON the plane to begin with? I'm sexy, smart, can follow orders, and I love to cause destruction. For heaven's sake, I found the nose art for our beloved bomber...if Denise get's booted, I'm your soldier. Over.
Looks like we're gonna need a co-pilot on plane #16. Our pilot is AWOL. We also need a model for our nose art. You are a redhead, right?

[mlyonsd]

Looks like we're gonna need a co-pilot on plane #16. Our pilot is AWOL. We also need a model for our nose art. You are a redhead, right?

Oh-oh. I feel a free agent battle coming on here.

[RNR]

Looks like we're gonna need a co-pilot on plane #16. Our pilot is AWOL. We also need a model for our nose art. You are a redhead, right?Irony defined! BD gets replaced by a hot chick! ROFL

[Warrior5]

Do we need to be extra viligent against sabotage?
"Viligent"?? Either you've been hanging around our tailgunner too much, or TK replaced you.

Oh-oh. I feel a free agent battle coming on here.
Ther ain't no stinkin' free agency in the Army Air Corps, let alone on this plane! We got waist gunners...CPT Logical needs a co-pilot, and LT Gump is a qualified avia-tor.

[Logical]

OK Crewdogs time for you to assemble for pre-flight shortarms (or maybe Longarms) inspection.

Countrygal will be in charge, no unsightly drip drip drip on this trip.

[Jenny Gump]

Looks like we're gonna need a co-pilot on plane #16. Our pilot is AWOL. We also need a model for our nose art. You are a redhead, right?

I am indeed!

[Cntrygal]

"Viligent"?? Either you've been hanging around our tailgunner too much, or TK replaced you.




Was reading dec. packages yesterday.........

[Cntrygal]

OK Crewdogs time for you to assemble for pre-flight shortarms (or maybe Longarms) inspection.

Countrygal will be in charge, no unsightly drip drip drip on this trip.


Talk about scary assignments, if anyone is offended by my laughter or comments - I will recommend they get transferred for being thin skinned wusses.

[Logical]

Talk about scary assignments, if anyone is offended by my laughter or comments - I will recommend they get tansferred for being thin skinned wusses.

ROFL:clap:

[JimNasium]

Talk about scary assignments, if anyone is offended by my laughter or comments - I will recommend they get transferred for being thin skinned wusses.
The cool thing about being a claymation character is that I can readily change physical attributes on command.

[Logical]

Sorry I was out drowning my sorrows at a local pub with Jenny Gump over the loss of kcnut.

To our crew:

crewdogs miss kcnut freind was he to all he faster blitzkrieg fly, but not faster than flak.:doh!::shake:

[Cntrygal]

Sorry I was out drowning my sorrows at a local pub with Jenny Gump over the loss of kcnut.

To our crew:

crewdogs miss kcnut freind was he to all he faster blitzkrieg fly, but not faster than flak.:doh!::shake:


did he die from complications? I thought he was just on IR.

[ChiefJustice]

He was sent back to the States.

[Raiderhater]

Irony defined! BD gets replaced by a hot chick! ROFL


ROFL

[Logical]

Plane #3 - Dreamsicle


Pilot Logical
Copilot memyselfi
Bombardier Hoover
Navigator The Bad Guy
Engineer JimNasium
Radio Op. BigChiefDave
Tail Gunner kcnut
Ball Turret Gunner Ecto-I
Right Waist Gunner Warrior5
Left Waist Gunner cntrygal


Target: Meaulte
Tail bomber in formation, middle in vertical (High vulnerability)

Dreamsicle draws the tail position in the bomber formation, which usually draws a lot of enemy fire.


Zone 1: England

No enemy

Zone 2: English Channel

No enemy

Zone 3: France (Entering Target Zone)

1 Me 110 driven away by fighters

Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
Medium Flak Defense
- 1 flak hit on tail – kcnut serious wound to right chest
Despite the flak hit, Hoover holds steady and scores a 5% hit.


Zone 3 (Leaving Target Zone)

2 Me109s driven off by fighters

Zone 2: English Channel

No enemy

Zone 1: England

No enemy
Good weather
Good landing

Aftereffects

Kcnut sent home with injury

Eligible for next mission

Pilot Logical
Copilot memyselfi
Bombardier Hoover
Navigator The Bad Guy
Engineer JimNasium
Radio Op. BigChiefDave
Tail Gunner Ecto-I
Ball Turret Gunner Warrior5
Right Waist Gunner cntrygal
Left Waist Gunner XXX

Milk run, other than that unfortunate piece of shrapnel in kcnut's lung.

[Cntrygal]

kc gets a "lung" injury - but none of us gets to fire a shot? Our fighters must like us a whole lot more than the other fighters like "their" bombers.

[Warrior5]

probably don't want to see our nose art go to waste.

[Jenny Gump]

Permission to come aboard Pilot?

[JimNasium]

Permission to come aboard Pilot?
Is that a euphemism? :hmmm: ROFL

[Logical]

Permission to come aboard Pilot?

Climb aboard.

[Jenny Gump]

Is that a euphemism? :hmmm: ROFL
Euphemism? Hmmmm...do I seem like a girl who would feel compelled to ask permission?

[Warrior5]

How the heck did I end up in the ball turret?!!! Why didn't you just leave Ecto-I down there. I'm claustrophobic, I'm hanging out at 25,000 feet, there's no room for my parachute, and it's full of...icky stuff.

[Rain Man]

Is that a euphemism? :hmmm: ROFL

It needed one more comma to be a euphemism.

[Logical]

Ok dogs the replacements are in:

Pilot Logical (1)
Copilot memyselfi (1)
Bombardier Hoover (1)
Navigator The Bad Guy (1)
Engineer JimNasium (1)
Radio Op. BigChiefDave (1)
Tail Gunner Ecto-I (1)
Ball Turret Gunner Warrior5 (1)
Right Waist Gunner cntrygal (1)
Left Waist Gunner JennyGump

Now make up the Dreamsicle crew. No grousing about our copilot command has spoken and we make do. Hoover you are getting practice in the #2 seat prior to our next mission just in case. Bad Guy you will take a few turns with the bomb sight just in case.

A hearty welcome aboard to Jenny who obviosly modeled for the Dreamsicle noseart. Woo WOO.:thumb:

[Hoover]

Bamn I like dropping bombs, can I stay there?

[Logical]

Bamn I like dropping bombs, can I stay there?


Bamn? You might have stayed at Pub a wee bit too long there Bissel

[Cntrygal]

Welcome Jenny! Let's kick some ass!!!

[Warrior5]

- we've had two milk runs.
- targets so far are in France (good).
- tailgunner died (kcnut).
- newbie Jenny Gump assigned to waist gunner.
- moved ball turret gunner Ecto-I to tail gunner.
- moved me from waist gunner to ball turret.
- co-pilot (Denise) is still AWOL.
- Hoover still sucks.

Q1: is there a heater in the ball turret?
Q2: how many latrines are on this plane?


...not getting in the ball until we're about to cross the channel.

[Cntrygal]

- we've had two milk runs.
- targets so far are in France (good).
- tailgunner died (kcnut).
- newbie Jenny Gump assigned to waist gunner.
- moved ball turret gunner Ecto-I to tail gunner.
- moved me from waist gunner to ball turret.
- co-pilot (Denise) is still AWOL.
- Hoover still sucks.

Q1: is there a heater in the ball turret?
Q2: how many latrines are on this plane?


...not getting in the ball until we're about to cross the channel.


A2.... better learn to hold it.

[Warrior5]

Not holding anything now that we're grounded.

And I wasn't referring to me; I was referring to the fact that the toilet(s) aren't stalls, and the metallic seat (if there is a seat) is going to be pretty cold at 25,000 feet. I'm not the one who has to sit.


...prefers to be dropping explosives on France.

[Jenny Gump]

Not holding anything now that we're grounded.

And I wasn't referring to me; I was referring to the fact that the toilet(s) aren't stalls, and the metallic seat (if there is a seat) is going to be pretty cold at 25,000 feet. I'm not the one who has to sit.


...prefers to be dropping explosives on France.

Ok. So about this cold toilet seat thing...can we get one of those cushy vinyl toilet seats? This might help.

Here to serve,
Jenny Gump

[Talisman]

Ok. So about this cold toilet seat thing...can we get one of those cushy vinyl toilet seats? This might help.

Here to serve,
Jenny Gump
If you guys give in and let her have one of those cushy toilet seats, your whole crew is officially whipped. :whip:

[Jenny Gump]

If you guys give in and let her have one of those cushy toilet seats, your whole crew is officially whipped. :whip:

Really, this isn't the time or place for an "if...then" statement. Not when the condition of "if" has already been established.

I will concede the cushy toilet seat for an occasional footrub.

Doing my part,
JennyGump

[JimNasium]

Engineering has no problem with the cushy toilet seat thang as long as you promise to return the seat to the upright position following use.

[Talisman]

Engineering has no problem with the cushy toilet seat thang as long as you promise to return the seat to the upright position following use.
And the pussification of the American male continues.

[JimNasium]

And the pussification of the American male continues.So what you are trying to say is that pussification is a bad thang? Personally, I like to be pussified if you know what I mean.

[Logical]

And the pussification of the American male continues.

Who let this geek on board.:mad:

[Logical]

...

...prefers to be dropping explosives on France.

From what I can tell you drop bombs everywhere you go. The S9 wanted to declare you a dangerous gas agent.

[Warrior5]

And the pussification of the American male continues.

<B>YOU</B> are the Wing S1. <B>YOU</B> assigned females to the bomber crews.

Who you calling whipped?

[Warrior5]

Mission #3 about to start...go to REDCON 2.

Fellow gunners: don't forget to headspace and time your .50s, and remember to charge them <B>twice</B>.


...wanting some kills for <I>Dreamsicle</I>.

[JimNasium]

Mission #3 about to start...go to REDCON 2.

Fellow gunners: don't forget to headspace and time your .50s, and remember to charge them <B>twice</B>.


...wanting some kills for <I>Dreamsicle</I>.Perfect timing. I am just finishing the repairs to both wings. The strength of bondo and duct tape is truly amazing.

[Warrior5]

Did you remember to feed the gerbils in the engine nacelles?

[JimNasium]

Did you remember to feed the gerbils in the engine nacelles?We use squirrels. I believe that gerbils are Phobia's department. :shake: ROFL

[Hoover]

Why is our plane orange?


We are all going to die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Rain Man]

It's Apri-...no, it really is orange, isn't it?

[Hoover]

effin Jim, and his crazy old man paint job. Dead men Flying

[Warrior5]

Why is our plane orange?

Some Donk fan was trying to sabotage our inside port engine when Logical turned the prop over.

[Logical]

Did you remember to feed the gerbils in the engine nacelles?

I think Anton stole the gerbils and now I do not want them back.:shake:

[JimNasium]

It looks like it is time to check the calibration on our instrumetation as well as check our gun sites for accuracy. I hereby request from Captain Logical that all liberty be cancelled pending said corrections.

[Logical]

It looks like it is time to check the calibration on our instrumetation as well as check our gun sites for accuracy. I hereby request from Captain Logical that all liberty be cancelled pending said corrections.

Man the one thing I know is Hoover sucks, if he survives this war he should open a company to build vacuums. Based on the way he bombs they will sell better than a Kirby upright.

Permission granted and leaves are cancelled until further notice.

[Cntrygal]

Present for duty.

[Hoover]

Man the one thing I know is Hoover sucks, if he survives this war he should open a company to build vacuums. Based on the way he bombs they will sell better than a Kirby upright.

Permission granted and leaves are cancelled until further notice.
I thought I would be co-piolt by now, I'm depressed.

[Logical]

I thought I would be co-piolt by now, I'm depressed.

And I thought the copilot would be the most effective bomb you could drop. Talk about depresses, I have to get you crew dogs back and forth while listening to this yap, yap yap that sounds like a chihauhau on steroids and uppers all flight long.:banghead:

[Rain Man]

I thought I would be co-piolt by now, I'm depressed.

I think the only way that'll happen is if you have the current copilot stand somewhere in France other than the target.

[Logical]

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/attachment.php?attachmentid=21518

B-17 #3 – Dreamsicle
...Entering Bomb Zone
Poor Weather – At least it’s starting to break up a bit.
No Flak
Hoover hits! Hoover hits! – 5% score

...Logical and memyselfI – a team that can’t be beat.

Wow after 4 missions we have managed 5% twice at this rate in 40 missions we will get to 100%.

Logical knows it probably does not work like this but is getting creative out of frustration.:doh!:


You people are not getting any better, no condoms until the next mission.

[JimNasium]

At the very least you can say that we have been consistent in our suckiness.

[Hoover]

Why if the Fu@k do we always bomb in shitty weather?

[JimNasium]

When I was a kid, my father told me, "never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it."

[JimNasium]

Why if the Fu@k do we always bomb in shitty weather?There's something wrong with us! Something very, very wrong with us! Something seriously wrong with us!

[Warrior5]

Quit blaming the weather, Hoover.

You just plain suck.

[Warrior5]

There's something wrong with us! Something very, very wrong with us! Something seriously wrong with us!

Well, we're alive, unlike the Wrath of Zod.


...blub, blub. blub.

[Logical]

Well, we're alive, unlike the Wrath of Zod.


...blub, blub. blub.


...blub, blub. blub ROFL

[Warrior5]

Frazod was in the Navy, so he ought to be able to hang on in the water until he's picked up by someone.

I heard he got picked up by a French fishing boat...after a few of his expletives, they tossed him back into the Channel.

[Hoover]

Maybe we could fly in nice weather if our plane wasn't fu@king orange...

[Logical]

Maybe we could fly in nice weather if our plane wasn't fu@king orange...

You don't mess with Karma, the Krauts cannot seem to hit an orange crate.

[Hoover]

Maybe they know the Bomber on the Orange Plane represnets no real danger?

[Logical]

Maybe they know the Bomber on the Orange Plane represnets no real danger?

50% wow that is not sucking at all, did you get a new belt?

[Hoover]

50% wow that is not sucking at all, did you get a new belt?
New belt? Why yes. Hoover is on that Atkins diet thing and before he couldn't get use the site because of his fat ass, since then I have droppeed 18 lbs and can see what I'm trying to hit :D.

[Logical]

New belt? Why yes. Hoover is on that Atkins diet thing and before he couldn't get use the site because of his fat ass, since then I have droppeed 18 lbs and can see what I'm trying to hit :D.
I knew it, it was just a fluke now the sun gets in your damn eyes.:shake:


Entering Bomb Zone
Good Weather
No Flak (We caught them by surprise?)
The sun was in hoover’s eyes, which is technically weather – 0% score

[Logical]

Hearty Congrats to

Jennygump fires, kills Me110

Ecto-1 fires, kills Me110

Warrior5 kills Me110


Three kills this mission:thumb:

[Jenny Gump]

Im so thrilled to have finally caused some death and destruction. Can I have some leave time to go shopping yet?

[Logical]

Im so thrilled to have finally caused some death and destruction. Can I have some leave time to go shopping yet?
I have heard they are opening a new shop in London called....


what was it. Oh yea Victoria's Secret. I hear women buy things to make men happy there. How about shopping for something to raise the crew's spirits.:evil:

[Jenny Gump]

I have heard they are opening a new shop in London called....


what was it. Oh yea Victoria's Secret. I hear women buy things to make men happy there. How about shopping for something to raise the crew's spirits.:evil:

You know, I'm all about morale....so, this new place, they sell beer and smoked meat? I'm on it Captain! [salute]

[Warrior5]

5 missions, 3 kills, and no promotions? What's up with that?

Just because your bombardier sucks doesn't mean the rest should be penalized.


Go to bat for us, boss!

[Cntrygal]

You know, I'm all about morale....so, this new place, they sell beer and smoked meat? I'm on it Captain! [salute]

Do they have whiskey??????

[Warrior5]

WTH is CPT Logical? I'd ask the co-pilot, but she deserted to France before our first mission. We got issues:

- need a co-pilot
- promotions
- whiskey


It's anarchy, I tell ya.

[Cntrygal]

WTH is CPT Logical? I'd ask the co-pilot, but she deserted to France before our first mission. We got issues:

- need a co-pilot
- promotions
- whiskey


It's anarchy, I tell ya.


I have whiskey.

[Logical]

I guess you got to have death to get promotions around here.

I cannot help it our Orange Krate blinds the Krauts and none of you get killed so you others can get a promotion.

I did push for a Jenny Gump Victoria Secret shopping trip to help raise morale.;)

[Jenny Gump]

I don't know WTH is going on in this plane, but I do know this... I'm tired of being cooped up on this bird, my knickers are chafing me, and I could use a hot shower! If you need me, I'll be in the back of the plane with Cntrygal getting drunk. She's my new best friend (well, she has the whiskey doesn't she?).

[Cntrygal]

LOL..... comeon back Jenny!

I'll share the whiskey if ya will stop at the bakery when you go shopping. ;)

[Logical]

WTH is CPT Logical? I'd ask the co-pilot, but she deserted to France before our first mission. We got issues:

- need a co-pilot
- promotions
- whiskey


It's anarchy, I tell ya.

Well you got your promotions at the expense of our little animated man aren't you ashamed of yourself.


Big congrats to our ace Ecto who put a major hurt on the enemy.:thumb:

[Warrior5]

Sorry to hear about Jim, but why should I be ashamed. He knew what the stakes were when he signed up for this outfit.

[Logical]

Sorry to hear about Jim, but why should I be ashamed. He knew what the stakes were when he signed up for this outfit.

You are right, drinks are on you, you got the promotion.

[JimNasium]

Sorry to hear about Jim, but why should I be ashamed. He knew what the stakes were when he signed up for this outfit.
I'm not exactly feelin' the love here. You guys talk as if I was dead. It's only a chest wound. :p

[Jenny Gump]

I'm not exactly feelin' the love here. You guys talk as if I was dead. It's only a chest wound. :p

Oh, Jim was a good soldier...even if he didn't know his starboard from his crankshaft. I will really miss giving him hell. Sniff sniff.


Ok, enough of that, who is the fresh meat on this plane?

[Warrior5]

Oh, Jim was a good soldier...even if he didn't know his starboard from his crankshaft. I will really miss giving him hell. Sniff sniff.


Ok, enough of that, who is the fresh meat on this plane?


Yeah, thanks for everything Jim. Enjoy convalesent leave stateside. We'll take care of Goliath for you, and I'll personally put his flak jacket on him for every mission.

Where's the noob...following the logical progression, he/she will be manning a waist gun, I move back to tailgunner, and countrygal goes into the ball turret. Hope your short cntrygal; I got tired of staring at my knees and having no parachute.


...looking forward to stretching out in the back.

[Cntrygal]

Yeah, thanks for everything Jim. Enjoy convalesent leave stateside. We'll take care of Goliath for you, and I'll personally put his flak jacket on him for every mission.

Where's the noob...following the logical progression, he/she will be manning a waist gun, I move back to tailgunner, and countrygal goes into the ball turret. Hope your short cntrygal; I got tired of staring at my knees and having no parachute.


...looking forward to stretching out in the back.


I don't consider myself short....... but will 5-6 1/2 give me enough leg room????? I guess I had better get another pair of "insulated" (wool) socks.

ah welll.... It's all good with some whiskey.

[Logical]

Welcome to Dreamsicle you are our new Left Waist Gunner EBOLA. We have fun and our Bombadier is having a bad week so steer clear. Watch out for JennyGump she is going to be after fresh meat.:D

[Cntrygal]

Welcome EBOLA! (do you drink whiskey?)

[Warrior5]

Welcome back to Dreamsicle...we didn't hit squat while you were gone, but then again, we haven't hit squat when you were here.

Here's to you continuing to suck when toggling the bombs (as long as we're over France).

Glad you're back; now get back up in the nose where you belong.

Sincerely,
Your friendly neighborhood tailgunner.

[Hoover]

Do you guys think it would be wise for me to drop the bombs before we fly over the target? I've just been trying to eye it up once I can see the target below us.

Bombardier Hoover

[Cntrygal]

Welcome back to Dreamsicle...we didn't hit squat while you were gone, but then again, we haven't hit squat when you were here.

Here's to you continuing to suck when toggling the bombs (as long as we're over France).

Glad you're back; now get back up in the nose where you belong.

Sincerely,
Your friendly neighborhood tailgunner.

Hey! I finally hit something!!!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally Posted by Rain Man
Cntrygal fires, hits Fw190

[Cntrygal]

btw... welcome back Hoover! ;)

[Warrior5]

btw... welcome back Hoover! ;)
You forgot the obligatory "you still suck, Hoover."

Do you guys think it would be wise for me to drop the bombs before we fly over the target? I've just been trying to eye it up once I can see the target below us.

Yeah, just throw that Norden thingy out and toggle away, Bombardier Boy!

[Jenny Gump]

I've been on leave in Atlanta the last few days. Sorry to have neglected my duties...but the good news, is I brought everyone Krispy Kreme Donuts.

Eat up men and woman.

[Warrior5]

I've been on leave in Atlanta the last few days. Sorry to have neglected my duties...but the good news, is I brought everyone Krispy Kreme Donuts.

Eat up men and woman.

Thanks Jenny. Please, someone pass the box back to me before Ecto-I gets his hands on it.

[Logical]

Thanks Jenny. Please, someone pass the box back to me before Ecto-I gets his hands on it.

That slimy shit ruins good doughnuts.:(

[Logical]

Well just another milkrun for Dreamsicle what are we going to do to liven up this crew?

[Warrior5]

I don't know...something tells me that after 9 milk runs, the crap is gonna hit the fan soon. Sorta like the undefeated Chiefs heading into Cincy last year.

Hoover still sucks, but I'm glad he's back.

[Warrior5]

WTG Bad Guy! Tearing up bandits from the navigator's gun.

At least I have an excuse for missing so much...that 7.9mm slug in the upper back was throwing off my aim, and it hurt a lot to recharge my .50s. Yeah, that's it.

Hoover still sucks, but he's our sucky bombardier, and we love him.

[Cntrygal]

Well just another milkrun for Dreamsicle what are we going to do to liven up this crew?


If exciting missions means death and dull missions means life.........


I'll take dull. :D

[Logical]

And everyone laughed when we painterd her orange! Haa:harumph:

[Slayer Diablo]

And everyone laughed when we painterd her orange! Haa:harumph:

I still say it shoulda been painted sky blue!!!



:p

[Cntrygal]

Good luck with the surgeries Warrior... When you're able, I'll buy the first night of drinkin' for ya. ;)

[Warrior5]

Good luck with the surgeries Warrior... When you're able, I'll buy the first night of drinkin' for ya. ;)

I have plenty of straws...just hoping the Squadron S1 puts me back on Dreamsicle. I don't mind starting over again at waist gunner.

[Cntrygal]

Can you come back to us? For some reason I was thinking you couldn't...... That would be great if you could! I'll have to check tomorrow... I'm off to bed. cya! ;)

[Warrior5]

Can you come back to us? For some reason I was thinking you couldn't...... That would be great if you could! I'll have to check tomorrow... I'm off to bed. cya! ;)

Well...if CPT Vlad put in a request, it might help.

[Logical]

Don't know the rules on replacements but Warrior5 would like back on Dreamsicle and we would like to have him if it can be arranged.

The request has been made to high command.

[Cntrygal]

The request has been made to high command.


Good! :thumb:

[Warrior5]

The request has been made to high command.

You da Man, CPT Vlad.

[Hoover]

So do you guys think I should take my eye glasses with on this next trip?

Thanks,

Hoov

[Cntrygal]

So do you guys think I should take my eye glasses with on this next trip?

Thanks,

Hoov


If you haven't been wearing them... don't start now. We've been alot luckier than some crews!

[Warrior5]

If you haven't been wearing them... don't start now. We've been alot luckier than some crews!


Very true, but try to wear them when we're bombing places other than France.

[Cntrygal]

RIP Hoover. (mission 13)

[Logical]

So do you guys think I should take my eye glasses with on this next trip?

Thanks,

Hoov

He took those glasses to try and improve and paid the ultimate price. God rest his brave soul.

[Warrior5]

I'm going to start wearing a kevlar hockey mask...my wife won't recognize me when I get back home.

Hoover: what can I say? You sucked 'till the very end.

Waiting for Dreamsicle II to come off the assembly line (hopefully it's a B-17G with twin .50s in the nose).

[Cntrygal]

Hey gang.... I've got 4th and Long coming to the hooch tonight, so he'll be out of the way. I'm thinking we shouldn't let Bug's stash go to waste on those guys.

Strolling out towards the flightline, Cntrygal finally finds 4th and Long.

"4th! How are ya doing? Tough luck about Bug. :shake: Anyway, we're having our 'post mission Tailgunners meeting' tonight at the hooch. Since you've been promoted, you're officially invited. Everyone brings a bottle to put up on the bar. See ya after chow. ;) "


I'm thinking we get the "tailgunners" stash. :D

AAwwww crap!!! Well at least the nurses are friendly......

To the best crew in the 8th Air Force, here are the instructions to locating the best moonshine on Earth.
2 quarts under the pilots seat, 2 quarts in the navigators cabinet, 2 quarts inside the radio, one quart above each waist gun window, one quart in the ball turret control panel, and 2 quarts above the tail gunners window near the rudder cables. ENJOY!!

Good luck and Godspeed to you all....now I have to get my tubes cleaned............

[Cntrygal]

BTW... make sure you check 4th's pack that is stowed by his seat. :D

[Warrior5]

Dreamsicle II is rusting to death, and I'm tired of playing cards.

[Cntrygal]

Dreamsicle II is rusting to death, and I'm tired of playing cards.


No kidding, and I'm not very good at domino's. :(

[go bo]

No kidding, and I'm not very good at domino's. :(yeah, i know what you mean...

and on top of that, it's too bad i'm married...

because these english gals are all right!! :p :p :p

[Logical]

I guess you got to have death to get promotions around here.

I cannot help it our Orange Krate blinds the Krauts and none of you get killed so you others can get a promotion.

I did push for a Jenny Gump Victoria Secret shopping trip to help raise morale.;)I don't think she ever returned from that shopping trip, I believe this was a command error.

[Adept Havelock]

I don't think she ever returned from that shopping trip, I believe this was a command error.

Why do I suddenly hear Don Felder's "Heavy Metal (Takin' A Ride)"?

[DenverChief]

Pillowbiters Exthpreth

:LOL: