Damn.

Bob Dole wishes someone had sent a reminder memo or something, so Bob Dole could have supplied stickers and buttons and other really nice swag.

Man, haven't you ever heard of Dole Pineapple ? He became so famous his pineapple was the talk of the ED world.

Bob Dole says Ross Perot has nothing on him........

Bob Dole has hired three of the worlds scariest groups of people to assist his plight of world domination.

Retired Ninjas

Vengeful Clowns

and of course: Old Porn Stars



Fight the power Bob Dole!

Over 24,000 post with only one hand. Unless him can type with that ink pen

Mr. Bob Dole once taught english to an entire tribe of cannibals allowing them, for the first time, to read microwave instructions and his personal copy of the recipe book, "400 Enticing Pork And Bean Ideas" which resulted in saving countless lives of unsuspecting travellers, missionaries, and jungle explorers.

We appreciate that, Mr. Bob Dole.

FAX

Don't forget that it also empowered them to read the instructions on the ball point pen packaging, which finally enabled them to extend the ink-filled tip and doodle in the margins.

It's A COOKBOOK!!!!!!

Bob Dole once used his eyebrow to rescue an orphan from the bottom of a well.

RJ enjoys Bob Dole's unique style of posting.

RJ also appreciates Bob Dole's somewhat caustic wit.

What RJ doesn't understand is why Bob Dole ever thought to post in the third person, much less to make it a trademark.

RJ hopes that Bob Dole might explain that. RJ is thinking that alcohol may have been involved, though RJ has never met Bob Dole and therefore has no real basis for his opinion.

Also, RJ is amused by the fact that Bob Dole seems to use his mod powers primarily for evil purposes.

Actually, he invented the Externet. It was kind of the Beta to the Internet's VHS. It's still used in a lot of developing countries, though.

ROFL

BTW -
anyone know of anyone still using Beta? That came and went quick, didn't it?

Mr. Bob Dole collected and utilized a lot of the discarded BetaMax parts to constuct an interstellar transport device in his garage, Mr. crazycoffey, which he uses to locate and capture puppies abandoned on worlds outside our own galaxy. He then nurses these unfortunate animals back to health and finds them new homes with loving caregivers mainly in Alabama.

A lot of very strange looking puppies really appreciate that.

FAX

:clap:
you never cease to amaze.......

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed
he was walking along the beach with Bob Dole.


Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene he noticed two sets of
footprints in the sand: one belonging
to him, and the other to Bob Dole.


When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.


He noticed that many times along the path of
his life there was only one set of footprints.


He also noticed that it happened at the very
lowest and saddest times in his life.


This really bothered him and he
questioned Bob Dole about it:


"Bob Dole, you said that once I decided to follow
you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life,
there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when
I needed you most you would leave me."

Bob Dole replied:


"My son, my precious child,
I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you. Now go get me a beer. I'm tired from carrying your fat ass. And don't be a lazy bitch. Get the good beer."