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-   -   Life If you knew the time was coming, would you give things to people you want to have (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=236058)

Gonzo 10-31-2010 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Laz (Post 7133749)
depends on who and what

some things would have a personal touch and message ... some things and just "things"

This.
I wouldn't give random stuff to people just to do it but items that mean something to you or them would mean more if you gave it to them in person.
You hang in there hon.
Posted via Mobile Device

luv 10-31-2010 08:00 PM

Do you have a will? I would say it's good to give what you can, but a will & testament will cover whatever you miss. As for how the receiver will feel, I think that depends on who they are. If they know your situation and your intentions, then I would think they wouldn't think it was morbid at all. That's just my opinion though. There are a lot of people who probably wouldn't accept it given the circumstances (like maybe they don't want to accept that you won't always be there). In those instances, it's good to have a will. Generally, even if people contest it, unless you weren't of age or of sound mind, or if it was not executed properly, then the court will do what it says. A person's last wishes are serious business.

cdcox 10-31-2010 08:01 PM

Give the personal approach a try and see how it goes. It's your life.

I'm really saddened to hear things are moving to this stage. Your dignity is a model for us all, Pam. Thanks for sharing this part of your life with us.

WilliamTheIrish 10-31-2010 08:02 PM

I'd give them all of your threads. That way you're not really out anything of value.

Gracie Dean 10-31-2010 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gonzo (Post 7134193)
This.
I wouldn't give random stuff to people just to do it but items that mean something to you or them would mean more if you gave it to them in person.
You hang in there hon.
Posted via Mobile Device

I just want to give some personal things to my family and some of my friends. I want them to know why I think they will be "good stewards" of said things. Why they mean what they do. That sort of stuff.

my clothes, CD's all that stuff, my kid and hubby can figure out that...

My husband wants nothing do do with these kinds of conversations but I feel I need to...Makes it hard sometimes.

Hubby thinks if he sticks his head in the sand it will go away.

I NEED to plan things (reverse nesting I guess) to help ease my mind.

For instance: in our home town, Cemetary plots are 200 dollars each in ICT they are 1500

Hubby says he will deal with it when needed and he won't need it for 50 years.

ClevelandBronco 10-31-2010 08:03 PM

Yes, I would want to give away some very personal items while I could still try to tell the recipient why I want them to have them and answer any questions they might have.

I'd also schedule my own wake for a time that I'd still be around to enjoy it with the people I love.

Hog's Gone Fishin 10-31-2010 08:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ClevelandBronco (Post 7134257)
Yes, I would want to give away some very personal items while I could still try to tell the recipient why I want them to have them and answer any questions they might have.

I'd also schedule my own wake for a time that I'd still be around to enjoy it with the people I love.

Would you invite some of us to the celebration ?

Gracie Dean 10-31-2010 08:06 PM

A great big party would be cool

ClevelandBronco 10-31-2010 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 7134264)
[/B]Would you invite some of us to the celebration ?

You bringing bacon?

Buehler445 10-31-2010 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KcChiefsKing (Post 7133854)
Damn... :(

This... :(

petegz28 10-31-2010 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buehler445 (Post 7134427)
This... :(

:( x eleventybillion

noa 10-31-2010 09:49 PM

Absolutely. I don't want to leave anything behind. I want to spend it all or give it all away while I'm still alive.

MadMax 10-31-2010 09:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by noswad (Post 7133882)
so you would have taken them just because of the situaiton?

I don't want it to be morbid or anything like that. My daughter knows she gets my jewelry but other things, I just want to share or remember special times. I do not want crying or pity tho...I want to be positive and leave lasting memories




It's ok Pam I'm at that stage also,I give everything to my 3 kids and let my Mom sort it out :( They all know how I feel about my critters and I have no doubt they will do the right thing.

CaliforniaChief 10-31-2010 10:01 PM

I wonder if it would help to approach your husband from this angle:

=Let him know that you understand it's very hard to talk about/think about.
=Tell him that talking about this issue will clear your mind and allow you to face what you're facing as best as you can...almost as if you need to address this in order to feel better.
=He could be in denial...or he could understand but wants to be strong for your family.

Just a few thoughts.

Gadzooks 10-31-2010 10:23 PM

I would give my special items to those who I thought should have them. However, being the receivee would make me sad (at first).
Do what you think's best. That way you can't go wrong.


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