Have you thought about a .22 or a .22mag for your mom? You mentioned small hands and a hard time with the slide on a semi-auto. Not near as noisy and minimal recoil. A well placed 22 round is just as lethal as a poorly placed .38 and she'll be able to get a follow-up shot easier/faster and more accurately if needed. Not as glamorous but might be a better fit for the situation.

.380 is a great round, too.

Sig P238 is a great small-bullet defense gun. Easy to use the slide, too.

80 yrs old? Do either of them have any loss in cognitive function yet? Suicide rates with elderly that have firearms in the home drastically increase. If you were to go a head and get them a firearm then I would be very diligent on being aware of their cognitive function. Any sign of dementia and the firearm has to go away with a quickness.

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