The appendix you find protruding from the bottom of the box of popcorn with the planeteer of the week, is very likely not a philange.

As it turns out, being the owner/operator of the keyboard of doom, does not come with a key to Mother nature's workshop, even if I may have have been forced to copulate her and pee in my mouth at some point to attain my current status.


Find something in your local community which requires volunteers. Its time now to plan the projects they'll be working on in the spring.

Dear Abby wannabe

Sure thing, Puffy.

That was kind of inappropriate.

Dear ''Keyboard of doom'',

I have a bad habit of eating raisin bran crunch for breakfast before I fly. unfortunately the raisins give me gawd awful foul gas. that, along with the combination of my intestines being squeezed from the cabin pressurization causes a lethal combination for my fellow passengers. I have a flight scheduled for next month, what am I to do?

Not sure what The Keyboard of Doom thinks, but you could try just leaving your butt plug in.

NTTAWWT

Well what in the hell did you expect?

My 8 year anniversary is next Tuesday......anything special I should do?

Hello,
My name is Iowanian. Have we met? Sometimes, the keyboard has a mind of its own, takes over the words displayed on the bb. Its like I don't even have any control over what I'm mooing.


Some assembly is required for this product, however on a thread in which the first handful of questions are "Does your wife snort during sex" should give you a clue that this isn't a Lane Giant "free pedicure for plus sized models" day.

Assuming its not a flight I'm using, I hope its Southwest, Eat 2 bowls and when you have your opportunity to use the new seat selection method, sit down next to the fat guy who already smells like Sour Milk or the cab-driver-American and let er rip.

After all, the preflight speech is very clear that should cabin pressure become an issue, oxygen masks with descend from the ceiling for each passenger to place over their face. Although the bag may not appear to inflate, oxygen is getting to you.

Better yet, eat some craisins on the in flight snack.....and walk up and fart by first class. It's the "abercrombie in the sky" and we all know how much dr i owa nian enjoys flatulating by Abercrombie folks.

Have you given her the gift of a vasectomy yet?

I believe that would be a gift for the gene pool as well.

Donkey punch.

Something you both can enjoy.