I went to Hollywood to pursue my dream, she called and said come home or we're getting divorced.

So i came home and we got divorced anyway.

About 6 months into our marriage my wife accused me of leaving the toilet seat up "all the time". I told her that was absolutely not true, that I never leave the seat up. She insisted that I did. Finally, I told her to follow me to the bathroom where I had her demonstrate how I left the seat up. Because the way it was mounted, the toilet lid would stay up, the the seat would instantly fall back down despite her best efforts to make it stay up.

Yeah, I hear chicks don't like it when their man stars in gay porn. Whodathunkit

This is just the beginning. She's ****ing a 20 year old, count on it.

Every kitchen in town.

I don't think she could take that after last night. Plus she knows she would be dead and they would never find anything. I'm not doing that twice in my lifetime.

LMAO true story, not long after arriving there, me and my bud go down to a trendy coffee shop on the Strip one saturday morning to wake up and take in the scene.

As soon as we walk in we notice a group of 7-8 guys, every single one had perfectly coiffed dark hair, ultra tan and were buff as hell, they could all have easily been fashion models, handsome dudes, but they were OBVIOUSLY gay, leaning all over each other, arms around each other... staring absolute holes in both of us.

I was tripping, it was like "here are these guys who could have almost any woman in town, and they're staring at me and my bro" LMAO

They looked like a gay gang.

I too had a Hollywood dream, but alas, there could be only one Bobby Brady.

LMAO

13 months was enough for me.

I bet that's only half of the story.

His ex knows ;)

No wash and wax either? Your an awful husband

turn it into a rape van