Naked, drunken man with 3 women in car hit 110 mph, police say

My question is were the 3 women naked too? What caused him to go so fast? :hmmm:

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/12/07...0mph-cops-say/

A Florida man with a history of drug, gun and theft arrests was allegedly naked, drunk and driving 110 mph with three female passengers when the Florida Highway Patrol caught up to him on Saturday afternoon.

Noe Dejesus, 33, was released Sunday after posting a $6,000 bond, FOX13 reported. He faces charges of DUI and driving without a license.

Dejesus was pulled over just after 3 p.m. following a report of a car driving recklessly on Alligator Alley. The Highway Patrol officer who clocked Dejesus’ speeding Cadillac initially believed the driver was merely shirtless.

But when Dejesus opened the door and stepped out, he was completely naked, police said.

The trooper allegedly spotted an open 12-pack of Corona and a nearly empty bottle of Crown Royal whiskey in the car, according to the Naples Daily News. Dejesus allegedly smelled of alcohol, was slurring his speech and almost fell down trying to put his pants on.

He declined to perform a field sobriety test and was arrested.

Haven't seen this thread in a while. We need that hot teacher caught having sex with a student thread bumped now.

POETIC JUSTICE SERVED BY WALLY GATOR!!!
 

Suspected Burglar Killed By Alligator While Hiding From Police In A Pond :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

http://rossmcgposts.tumblr.com/post/...r-while-hiding

A suspected burglar has been killed by an alligator while hiding out in a pond.

The body of Matthew Riggins, 22, was found in water in Barefoot Bay in Florida ten days after he was reported missing.

Police said Riggins was attacked by an 11-foot long alligator while he was hiding out after a series of planned break-ins.

Before he was reported missing, Riggins called his girlfriend to tell her he would be in the area breaking into homes.

Two men dressed in black lurking behind homes were spotted by residents, leading to a police search of the area that involved a helicopter and dog units.

The search was called off but Riggins was reported missing by his family the next day.

Major Tod Goodyear, from the Brevard County Sheriff’s Office, told BayNews9: “He probably went into the lake to hide from the officers and the dog, and came across that gator.

“To hide somewhere to try and get away, and then meeting up with an animal like that, no, I’ve never had that happen before.”

When a police dive team located Riggins’ body, they also came across the alligator, which was euthanised.

Some of Riggins’ remains were found inside the animal’s stomach.

http://41.media.tumblr.com/3084530fb...tvq1n4_500.png

http://orig01.deviantart.net/ffbd/f/...us-d4uaypf.jpg

I love this thread. I love it a really lot.

Man, that's gratitude for you.

They killed the gator because he didn't have a hunting license! ROFLROFL

ME TOO! :thumb:

It never stops giving along with the teacher-student sex thread!

ROFL ZOMG

PORT ST. LUCIE, Fla. —A Port St. Lucie woman is free on bail after being arrested for a fight over flatulence.

Police were called to a home recently on a domestic battery complaint.

Donald Meikle told police that he was passing gas in bed when his wife, Dawn, began elbowing him on his arm. He said his wife eventually kicked him out of their bed because he would not stop passing gas.

Donald Meikle said he got back into the bed and passed gas again. He said his wife started kicking him again. At that point, he said he began to restrain his wife out of concern for his safety.

Donald Meikle said that while he was restraining her, her lip was split open.

Dawn Meikle gave the same version of events to police.

She was arrested for domestic battery and later released.

http://www.kmbc.com/national/fight-o...t%20Type=Story

Nothing better than starting off this week with another Important News Story out of Florida. This is an oldie but a goodie, and one of my favorite News Story Headlines:

Police Say Man With No Hands and No Legs Is Armed and On the Run


Authorities in Florida are searching for an armed quadruple amputee who's reportedly been on the run since Tuesday, hoping to question him about his involvement in a double murder.

Sean Petrozzino, 30, reportedly lost his legs, hands and parts of his arms to bacterial meningitis years ago. Police say he moved in with his parents last week after separating from his wife amidst some serious financial issues.

Both of his parents were both found dead Tuesday morning after Sean's mother, Nancy Petrozzino, failed to show up for her job as a schoolteacher.

Sean Petrozzino was last seen on an ATM surveillance camera Tuesday morning. Although police say he's currently a "person of interest" and not an official suspect in the double murder, a spokesperson did caution that he's armed with a gun.

A prosthetics expert told the Orlando Sentinel you don't need a hand to shoot both your parents—just the will—as most guns can apparently be fired by the handless, "without special devices."

Evidently not the same guy...

http://www.theblaze.com/wp-content/u..._3-620x429.jpg

http://tse1.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.M7...4edo0&pid=15.1

But it can be done...

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0xOse6a08a...e+shooting.jpg

And WTH????

http://www.everydaynodaysoff.com/wp-...Uncensored.jpg

THREE SEPARATE AND WONDERFUL WOMEN OF FLORIDA
 

1. Florida woman arrested after drinking wine, eating rotisserie chicken while driving motorized cart around Wal-Mart

http://wthitv.com/2016/01/02/florida...ound-wal-mart/

https://lintvwthi.files.wordpress.co...3am2.jpg?w=650

CITRUS COUNTY, Fla. (WFLA) – A woman ate sushi, cinnamon rolls and the majority of a rotisserie chicken, while drinking wine and driving a motorized shopping cart at Walmart, according to the Citrus County Sheriff’s Office. She was arrested for shoplifting and other charges.

It happened at the Lecanto Walmart on Tuesday. Citrus deputies responded after the store loss prevention employee contacted them about an alleged shoplifter he had in custody. The employee told deputies that he had noticed the woman acting suspiciously driving the motorized shopping cart.

He could see a half-empty bottle of wine in her cart. He also said he watched her grab a box of sushi from the shelf, eat a piece and put the box back. She did the same with cinnamon rolls and mini muffins. He says he then saw her eat the majority of a rotisserie chicken while on the shopping floor.

The woman, Josseleen Elida Lopez, 20, consumed $32.36 worth of food and wine while at the store, deputies say.

When the deputies arrested her, they found two empty syringes, one in her purse and one in her backpack. She told detectives she had used the syringes to shoot up meth earlier.

When they asked her why she took the food she said she was hungry and didn’t want to bring it outside of the store. She told them she knew that what she was doing was wrong.

She was arrested on shoplifting and drug paraphernalia charges.


2. Florida woman arrested after 5 kids found by highway in only diapers

http://wncn.com/2015/12/31/florida-w...-only-diapers/

https://mgtvwncn.files.wordpress.com...sted.jpg?w=620

A 24-year-old woman was arrested on suspicion of child neglect after five young children were found attempting to cross a Florida highway wearing nothing but heavily soiled diapers, police said.

The kids, aged from 1 to 5, were stopped by a motorist before they entered traffic lanes on Route 19 outside Spring Hill, 40 miles north of Tampa, Tuesday morning.

The children were unable to say their names or where their parents were. The youngest child, a 1-year-old girl, had a “severe rash on various parts of her body” that appeared to have been there for several weeks, according to a statement from Hernando County Sheriff’s Office Wednesday.

Deputies had been at the scene for 30 minutes when they were approached by Samantha McCarthy, who told them that the children she was caring for at a nearby Motel 6 went missing while she was asleep.

The 24-year-old told officers her door was locked and she had no idea how the children got out. She added the youngest child’s rash had been there for two-to-three days and she planned to seek medical treatment later that day.

However, deputies said they confirmed McCarthy had no mode of transport and had made no appointment with a doctor. Officials from Florida’s Department for Children and Families searched the motel room and found no food and only minimal clothing.

McCarthy was arrested on suspicion of child neglect and her bond was set at $5,000. Officials did not state her relationship to the children.

The Department for Children and Families took all five children, aged 5, 4, 3, 2 and 1, into custody and the youngest child was taken to hospital for treatment for her rash.


3. Police: Naked Florida woman booked after abandoning child, urinating on police

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/...110-story.html

http://www.trbimg.com/img-5692b240/t...01/375/211x375

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. (AP) — Police have booked a woman they say abandoned her child and fought officers as they arrested her.

Multiple news outlets report Daytona Beach police arrested 34-year-old Jennifer Cael Thursday on charges including child neglect and resisting an officer with violence.

According to a charging affidavit, Cael left her child with strangers Thursday night at a lobby of an apartment complex.

Police later found Cael intoxicated and naked inside an apartment. Police say she approached officers and punched one in the chest. They say she also urinated on them when they tried placing her in handcuffs.

She was being held at Volusia County Branch Jail. It's unclear if she has an attorney.

I just love Floriduh!

No Cash To Open A Bank Account? Don't Do What This Guy Allegedly Did

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/...0cad15e65c401?

Steve Leon Coley Jr. of Florida walked into a Bank of America to open an account, but the teller told him he didn't have the $25 minimum. Police say he solved the problem in a simple way -- he robbed the place.

The 36-year-old was arrested Wednesday hours after he entered the bank to make his first deposit, according to WTSP.com.

Deputies in Pasco County said the suspect showed his Florida driver's license to the teller on his first visit and returned around 2:47 p.m. demanding money, according to TampaBay.com.

Police say Coley left with an undisclosed amount of cash and was spotted walking down the street counting money.

The arresting officer said Coley fit the description of the suspect and that he had the exact amount of money stolen from the bank in his possession, according to ABC Action News.

Coley was arrested on one count of robbery without a weapon. He was taken to the Land O'Lakes Detention Center, according to jail records.

http://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/...2c000303aa.png

I eat stuff from my cart all the time. I just hand them the empty container and they scan it as bought. M&M's especially. I've popped a 40 before as well, but I hid the drinking of it. That was frowned upon by the clerk, who also found it funny.

I go to Walmart like once a month to get my meds and do a little shopping. I go before 9am so it's not busy at all and I cruise around in one of the motorized cars.

I used to worry about an employee telling me to get my fat ass off, but most people see the huge zipper on the side of my head and go about their business. :D