Put it in the fireplace

Do whole chickens regularly, but have never tried my hand at a turkey

Guess I'd just treat it like an extra big chicken... lower and slower the better, with plenty of uncovered time to render the fat

I'll have to ask whoever invites me over.

Prolly be eating FGs

Spatchcock

In all seriousness if you bake or smoke your turkey and you're not brining it, then you are seriously missing out.

Brining makes the bird taste good, but the drippings inedible.

I’m surprised this thread title wasn’t “This turkey was made brown and moist by you?”

Mom wants me to smoke one. I will, like I always do, but Christ I hate turkey

How the hell do you brine a turkey? I don't have a pan that big. I looked at food grade 5 gal buckets but didn't want to drop that kind of coin.

Cooler.

If you're renting, be sure to put it out on your deck.

When in doubt, Alton Brown it.

[as in look up some mix of 'Alton Brown Good Eats Thanksgiving Turkey' on youtube]

Why in the bloody hell didn't I think of that?

I’ve smoked em, fried em, and brined and roasted them. I prefer brined and roasted. Least amount of mess, and IMO, the most moist and flavorful