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-   -   News Bully beats local boy to near death (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=290874)

Iowanian 02-25-2015 12:13 PM

You're right about the parenting. How often do "bullies" have 2 parents at home?

I'm just not sure HOW they can stop this stuff. I've read some things lately that local kids are doing to each other online and it's pretty nasty. The parents have to have some liability for the actions of the child, but ultimately a 200lb 8th grader is responsible for his actions.

We talk to our kids quite a bit about being nice to everyone, and sticking up for the kids or not participating if others are being mean. It's not acceptable in our house and if I got a call that my kid was picking on someone else it would be their ass at home.

Obviously a large segment of our society don't do the same.

displacedinMN 02-25-2015 12:13 PM

You know I teach.

This is a disgusting event.

I wish more could be done. All kids cannot be watched all the time, the bully kid knew that and took his chance.

The parents need to press charges against the kid and the family. The school may try to talk them out of it. But it needs to happen. Many times, parents don't press charges and the kid gets off scott free. The kid should also be expelled.

I have seen my share of fights. Middle school girl fights are brutal. I have broken up a few, and some I say no way. Seldom do I hear of charges being filed-it needs to happen more-especially on an ambush like this.

The next problem is the justice system. Judges let them off with probation or warnings.
Minimum should be fines, maximum-adult jail time. You are responsible for your kids.

The Franchise 02-25-2015 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by displacedinMN (Post 11346871)
You know I teach.

This is a disgusting event.

I wish more could be done. All kids cannot be watched all the time, the bully kid knew that and took his chance.

The parents need to press charges against the kid and the family. The school may try to talk them out of it. But it needs to happen. Many times, parents don't press charges and the kid gets off scott free. The kid should also be expelled.

I have seen my share of fights. Middle school girl fights are brutal. I have broken up a few, and some I say no way. Seldom do I hear of charges being filed-it needs to happen more-especially on an ambush like this.

The next problem is the justice system. Judges let them off with probation or warnings.
Minimum should be fines, maximum-adult jail time. You are responsible for your kids.

So you're telling me that if the school repeatedly gets letters about a certain kid....that you wouldn't watch him a little more?

If this was my kid.....not only would the family be getting sued....but the school would as well.

tomahawk kid 02-25-2015 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WhawhaWhat (Post 11346865)
I used to be one of the "It can't be that bad. Everyone gets bullied and they just need to learn to suck it up" people... until I saw that Bully movie and that was soul crushing. That movie really changed the way I thought about it.

Same here. That movie was a wake up call for me.

Bullying has escalated quite a bit since I was a kid.

displacedinMN 02-25-2015 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dicky McElephant (Post 11346874)
So you're telling me that if the school repeatedly gets letters about a certain kid....that you wouldn't watch him a little more?

If this was my kid.....not only would the family be getting sued....but the school would as well.

no, not completely

there are 1500 kids in my school, about 100 staff
Some kids get 1:1, some don't

that may equate to 15-1 ratio, but the class I have now is 35.
Can't watch everyone all the time.

Boise_Chief 02-25-2015 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by temper11 (Post 11346861)
What did they do to take care of it? Expel the kid?

He got a 3 day suspension the parents were brought in and it was explained that one more incident would result in permanent expulsion. They also told them that I would sue but I never said I would sue the parents., just the school district.

Plus my older son had a chat with him and told him he would beat him senseless if he even looked at his brother again.

It was a problem solved, the boy actually straighted up quite a bit and he got in much less trouble after that.

temper11 02-25-2015 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boise_Chief (Post 11346910)
He got a 3 day suspension the parents were brought in and it was explained that one more incident would result in permanent expulsion. They also told them that I would sue but I never said I would sue the parents., just the school district.

Plus my older son had a chat with him and told him he would beat him senseless if he even looked at his brother again.

It was a problem solved, the boy actually straighted up quite a bit and he got in much less trouble after that.

That's awesome that it worked out that way. It surprises me a little that the school actually suspended the kid with nothing more than your word that bullying took place. I'm not suggesting for one second that you are lying, I am just saying that that if the school didn't witness the bullying they open themselves up to potential lawsuit from the parents of the kid they suspended.

Flip it around. what would you do if the school called you up and said your kid was being suspended for allegedly bullying a kid. No one saw the bullying, but the school was informed of it from the other kids parents. You know that the suspension is going to go on your child's permanent record and will be with him for a very long time. You also don't think your kid would have done such a thing and he denies having done it... what would you do?

This is obviously a hypothetical question. The actual boy may have had a history of bad behavior, etc. Also, if your kid was a problem child and you knew it, you may be far more rational than many of the parents out there. In my brother's case, the parents know their kid is guilty. They know their kid is a POS, but if the school didn't witness the alleged bullying - they are going to sue the shit out of the school if they take any action against their little darling. It frustrates the hell out of my brother. The parents of many of these kids are enablers of their kids bad behavior, not partners in the attempt to make them into solid citizens.

Boise_Chief 02-25-2015 03:58 PM

The short answer is that the bus driver did see the culminating event and did nothing. There had been several recess incedents that had been seen as well. The parents were worthless and tried to make excuses and bluster. The school finally did sometuing other than putting the kid on the fence as a time out. They also convinced them that I was ready to sue press charges etc

ChiefsChoke010414 02-25-2015 04:04 PM

The bully should be sent to Riker's Island to the pedophiles ward of the prison.

temper11 02-25-2015 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boise_Chief (Post 11347240)
The short answer is that the bus driver did see the culminating event and did nothing. There had been several recess incedents that had been seen as well. The parents were worthless and tried to make excuses and bluster. The school finally did sometuing other than putting the kid on the fence as a time out. They also convinced them that I was ready to sue press charges etc

Ahh... I didn't catch that the incident had been witnessed by a school employee.

gblowfish 02-25-2015 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by temper11 (Post 11346801)
This is going to be a really unpopular post here, but my brother is an administrator at a middle school and talks all the time about the fact that there really isn't anything they can do unless they actually catch the accused bully in the act. A letter from parents isn't enough for them to take action or they get sued by the accused bully's parents. Many people want to blame the school administration, but it's really the lawyers that are calling the shots on what can and can't be done. Administrators have their hands tied until they actually catch the act in progress. I've got 4 kids ranging in ages 6 to 17 so elementary school, middle school and high school. I've got at least one kid in each of them right now. I teach my kids to stand up for other kids who are being bullied. Get their friends to stand up with them. Make bullying unpopular for the bully. I didn't get bullied but I wish I'd have stood up more for kids that did. I was in position to do so on occasion (just teasing stuff) and didn't do enough to put a stop to it.

Unfortunately, this is the truth. Public schools are run by litigation. They are scared to death of being sued, by everyone and everything. Somebody usually has to get hurt before anything is done. My wife gets her 30 years in as a teacher this year, and as of June 1 she is DONE with public school teaching. With all the teaching to the MAP test, and kids getting away with all kinds of behavior problems, and no consequences for bad behavior, etc etc etc, it's very hard to be a teacher now. And its just going to get worse.

Rudy tossed tigger's salad 02-25-2015 05:22 PM

This kid better not show up at the little league field.

Jiu Jitsu Jon 02-25-2015 05:26 PM

I think Prinicpal Skinner said it best when he said "There's no justice like angry mob justice." After the parents of the bully got a few beatings from doorknob-filled sacks they'd probably tire of his antics pretty quickly and the behavior would stop. Actually, Valencia oranges would be better as they're less apt to leave bruises - or so I'm told...

bobbymitch 02-25-2015 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by temper11 (Post 11346801)
This is going to be a really unpopular post here, but my brother is an administrator at a middle school and talks all the time about the fact that there really isn't anything they can do unless they actually catch the accused bully in the act. A letter from parents isn't enough for them to take action or they get sued by the accused bully's parents. Many people want to blame the school administration, but it's really the lawyers that are calling the shots on what can and can't be done. Administrators have their hands tied until they actually catch the act in progress. I've got 4 kids ranging in ages 6 to 17 so elementary school, middle school and high school. I've got at least one kid in each of them right now. I teach my kids to stand up for other kids who are being bullied. Get their friends to stand up with them. Make bullying unpopular for the bully. I didn't get bullied but I wish I'd have stood up more for kids that did. I was in position to do so on occasion (just teasing stuff) and didn't do enough to put a stop to it.

Soooo, the incident occurs in the school cafeteria and as long as any school employee doesn't actually witness the incident, or turns their back to the fight, then the bully walks??? Maybe the blood on the floor might be some sort of evidence that a crime occurred?

temper11 02-25-2015 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobbymitch (Post 11347426)
Soooo, the incident occurs in the school cafeteria and as long as any school employee doesn't actually witness the incident, or turns their back to the fight, then the bully walks??? Maybe the blood on the floor might be some sort of evidence that a crime occurred?

Obviously the incident in which the kid gets beat to near death is evidence. I'm talking about the alleged incidents preceding this one that lead to the letter the parents sent to the school. There likely wasn't much the school could have done with just the letter to go on. (Again, I don't know anything about the case, and I'm not a lawyer or a school administrator). I'm simply relaying the same frustrations my brother has spoke of as a high school administrator.


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