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-   -   Misc A Letter That Will Make You Feel Uncomfortable at Best (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=275448)

loochy 08-21-2013 09:44 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fan4ever (Post 9903692)
Y'know, I can get people being irritated by things like this in addition to it being a situation they don't understand or appreciate. In all honesty, I wouldn't like it either...but isn't that when we're supposed to better than that? The Golden Rule? Maybe take a second to think about what these people's lives are like and maybe the last thing they need is a crappy neighbor making things even worse.
He's not defending the letter. That's not the proper way to deal with it.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 09:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestilence (Post 9903680)
From what my wife said....she was probably around 40-50.

Stupid thing is.....is my daughter is quiet and polite. You'd never know she was there because she doesn't make a ton of a noise. The stupid **** just didn't like the fact that she had to share the same air with her. AFAIC.....the old bitch can stop breathing and die.
Oh, so you just ran across a stupid bitch. That'll happen.

Your wife should have paid for the lady's lunch and then had the waitress tell her that "The lady with the little girl paid for your lunch. She said it must be really hard to go through life as a moron and felt sorry for you".

fan4ever 08-21-2013 09:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by loochy (Post 9903693)
He's not defending the letter. That's not the proper way to deal with it.
No, I know that...didn't mean to insinuate he did. Wasn't criticizing, just discussing. Sorry for any confusion.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 09:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by loochy (Post 9903381)
Well, some people are telling stories about their encounters with mentally handicapped folks. On the side, JASONSAUTO and Frazod are bitching at each other about nothing.
ROFL I've been waiting for Obama to invite these two to the White House for a beer.

The Franchise 08-21-2013 09:52 AM
I do have a ton of respect for parents who have to go through what they go through on a daily basis. I was best friends with a kid in high school who had a mentally handicapped brother and I always asked him how he dealt with everything. His brother was around 3 years older than us and spent most of the day in the "special" classes....but kids are obviously dickheads and used to make fun of him all the time.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 10:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestilence (Post 9903721)
I do have a ton of respect for parents who have to go through what they go through on a daily basis. I was best friends with a kid in high school who had a mentally handicapped brother and I always asked him how he dealt with everything. His brother was around 3 years older than us and spent most of the day in the "special" classes....but kids are obviously dickheads and used to make fun of him all the time.
Kids have the excuse of ignorance; hard to hold it against them. Now adults on the other hand...

patteeu 08-21-2013 10:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fan4ever (Post 9903692)
Y'know, I can get people being irritated by things like this in addition to it being a situation they don't understand or appreciate. In all honesty, I wouldn't like it either...but isn't that when we're supposed to better than that? The Golden Rule? Maybe take a second to think about what these people's lives are like and maybe the last thing they need is a crappy neighbor making things even worse.
After you take a second to think about all the possibilities, maybe you can conceive of situations where a family with a special needs child actually has some responsibility to prevent certain foreseeable outcomes. Just to come up with an easy to understand example (even though it's highly unlikely), if the mother of a special needs child lets the child play in the car that's parked in the back yard by honking it's horn at 2 am while the neighbors are trying to sleep, the problem would be the child's mother not the angry neighbors.

I don't know that I can fully appreciate the difficulties people like you and my friend face, but I think I appreciate it enough to understand that a reasonable amount of slack should be given. But that slack isn't endless.

Dayze 08-21-2013 10:01 AM
This is my fear of having kids.
I don't think I could handle it.

I'm broke and stressed out as is.

patteeu 08-21-2013 10:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayze (Post 9903742)
This is my fear of having kids.
I don't think I could handle it.

I'm broke and stressed out as is.
I'm fortunate enough to have kids who are healthy and that's stressful enough. I really can't imagine how difficult it must be to take care of children who have serious, long term health problems whether physical or mental. I have a great deal of respect for the people with the strength to do it.

Dayze 08-21-2013 10:09 AM
yep; me too.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 10:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9903741)
After you take a second to think about all the possibilities, maybe you can conceive of situations where a family with a special needs child actually has some responsibility to prevent certain foreseeable outcomes. Just to come up with an easy to understand example (even though it's highly unlikely), if the mother of a special needs child lets the child play in the car that's parked in the back yard by honking it's horn at 2 am while the neighbors are trying to sleep, the problem would be the child's mother not the angry neighbors.

I don't know that I can fully appreciate the difficulties people like you and my friend face, but I think I appreciate it enough to understand that a reasonable amount of slack should be given. But that slack isn't endless.
Absolutely; that's why (I posted this earlier) I don't take my son to movies although he loves them. He can't stay quiet and I don't want to ruin the movie for everyone else. Some parents do feel that since they've been given this burden, everyone else should accomodate them and that's unfortunate because it really is counter-productive.

ShortRoundChief 08-21-2013 10:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestilence (Post 9903634)
Once again....not in the same aspect of what you're going through....but my 6 year old daughter has to get 24 hour EEGs 3 or 4 times a year to measure her brain activity. So for 24 hours...she has to wear electrodes on her head...and her head is then wrapped up so she doesn't mess with them. All of the electrodes are attached to wires that run down to a backpack that she has to wear. Everytime that my daughter gets one done....my wife takes her out for lunch and to pick out a small toy.

My wife called me crying one time because they were out eating lunch and some lady walked by the table they were sitting at and said under her breath "she shouldn't even be here.....keep her at home next time". ****ing **** is lucky I wasn't there because I would have snapped.
oh yeah. To me that is justifiable homicide.

patteeu 08-21-2013 10:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fan4ever (Post 9903767)
Absolutely; that's why (I posted this earlier) I don't take my son to movies although he loves them. He can't stay quiet and I don't want to ruin the movie for everyone else. Some parents do feel that since they've been given this burden, everyone else should accomodate them and that's unfortunate because it really is counter-productive.
:thumb: That's all I meant by asking what "louder" meant. If it's just a kid out in the back yard in the afternoon swinging on a swing set while singing off-key at the top of his lungs, it seems like something the neighbors ought to be able to deal with. If it's banging on the side of a tin shed with a hammer at 6 am, the parents should probably take the hammer away or keep the kid inside for a couple more hours.

FlaChief58 08-21-2013 10:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9903760)
I'm fortunate enough to have kids who are healthy and that's stressful enough. I really can't imagine how difficult it must be to take care of children who have serious, long term health problems whether physical or mental. I have a great deal of respect for the people with the strength to do it.
This. I thank God my kids & grandkids are all healthy. I have the utmost respect for those who have special needs kids

fan4ever 08-21-2013 10:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayze (Post 9903742)
This is my fear of having kids.
I don't think I could handle it.

I'm broke and stressed out as is.
We have family members who can't have a baby and they were going to adopt a special needs baby. They told my wife and I that we were an inspiration to them that they wanted to do this. We told them as much as we appreciate the compliment, they should think long and hard about doing such a thing...we didn't sign up for this challenge and would love to not have this on our plate. That being said, if you're in a strong marriage, you can handle more than you ever dreamed...

NewChief 08-21-2013 10:17 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9903760)
I'm fortunate enough to have kids who are healthy and that's stressful enough. I really can't imagine how difficult it must be to take care of children who have serious, long term health problems whether physical or mental. I have a great deal of respect for the people with the strength to do it.
It's a different kind of stress. With my disabled son, I'm not really worried about him doing drugs, acting dangerously, getting talked into doing stupid shit, lying to me, hanging out with the wrong crowd, etc...

My younger son, on the other hand, is a handful in an entirely different way. He, unfortunately, reminds me (and everyone else who knows him) of my brother when he was young. That brother has been in and out of jail his entire life and an addict of some sort since 8th grade. Those are not worries I have with my disabled son.

NewChief 08-21-2013 10:21 AM
And let me add:

While my disabled son's condition is a source of heartbreak for my wife and I from time to time, if my other son were to go down the wrong path, that could possibly be an even greater source of heartbreak, guilt, etc.. because of the wasted potential.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 10:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewChief (Post 9903803)
And let me add:

While my disabled son's condition is a source of heartbreak for my wife and I from time to time, if my other son were to go down the wrong path, that could possibly be an even greater source of heartbreak, guilt, etc.. because of the wasted potential.
It's funny how similar a path we all walk. As we were leaving the hospital, and it was obvious he was severly impacted, an older lady who was with us in the elevator reached over and stroked his head as my wife held him, smiled and said "He'll never disappoint you". Initially we thought that was weird but now get what she was saying. She must have walked the same mile at one time.

Mr. Plow 08-21-2013 10:31 AM
And my wife wonders why I hate people.

SAUTO 08-21-2013 10:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patteeu (Post 9903774)
:thumb: That's all I meant by asking what "louder" meant. If it's just a kid out in the back yard in the afternoon swinging on a swing set while singing off-key at the top of his lungs, it seems like something the neighbors ought to be able to deal with. If it's banging on the side of a tin shed with a hammer at 6 am, the parents should probably take the hammer away or keep the kid inside for a couple more hours.
they said it was "wailing".


to me that means he is expressing himself in his own way. probably sounds like he is yelling at a higher volume.

ShortRoundChief 08-21-2013 10:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO (Post 9903857)
they said it was "wailing".


to me that means he is expressing himself in his own way. probably sounds like he is yelling at a higher volume.
That's entirely different than my definition of whaling. When I whale I get a bottle of scotch, go to the club and won't talk to any woman whose ankles are thinner than my torso.

That's ****ing whaling--done right.

Mosbonian 08-21-2013 10:44 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestilence (Post 9903634)
Once again....not in the same aspect of what you're going through....but my 6 year old daughter has to get 24 hour EEGs 3 or 4 times a year to measure her brain activity. So for 24 hours...she has to wear electrodes on her head...and her head is then wrapped up so she doesn't mess with them. All of the electrodes are attached to wires that run down to a backpack that she has to wear. Everytime that my daughter gets one done....my wife takes her out for lunch and to pick out a small toy.

My wife called me crying one time because they were out eating lunch and some lady walked by the table they were sitting at and said under her breath "she shouldn't even be here.....keep her at home next time". ****ing **** is lucky I wasn't there because I would have snapped.
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.

Your children teach you so much....

Mr. Flopnuts 08-21-2013 11:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 9903885)
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.

Your children teach you so much....
Powerful. That's the only word I can use to describe this post. Those kids are absolutely perfect in their own ways...

fan4ever 08-21-2013 12:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 9903885)
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.



Your children teach you so much....
Your son sounds well equipped for the world, and you, your wife, and family deserve an immense amount of the credit for that. Congratulations.

InChiefsHeaven 08-21-2013 12:37 PM
I was at the food court at a mall with my wife about a year ago. There was a group of special needs kids in wheelchairs. I mean, severe. The people taking care of them came into the food court probably for lunch, and I was absolutely astounded at how well they were with these kids. I can't think of any other way to put it except vegetative. Looking around, not seeing anything, just pitiful. But the people with them talked amongst themselves and to the special needs kids like there was nothing wrong.

I guess for them there wasn't. I actually teared up a little at the whole thing. It was beautiful and terrible all at the same time. I have 2 healthy "normal" kids who give me enough grief. My hat's off to those who care for these people. It takes a special person to do that, and I ain't one of them.

seclark 08-21-2013 12:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InChiefsHell (Post 9904151)
It takes a special person to do that, and I ain't one of them.
you'd be surprised at what you can do when dealt a hand like this.
sec

fan4ever 08-21-2013 12:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InChiefsHell (Post 9904151)
I was at the food court at a mall with my wife about a year ago. There was a group of special needs kids in wheelchairs. I mean, severe. The people taking care of them came into the food court probably for lunch, and I was absolutely astounded at how well they were with these kids. I can't think of any other way to put it except vegetative. Looking around, not seeing anything, just pitiful. But the people with them talked amongst themselves and to the special needs kids like there was nothing wrong.

I guess for them there wasn't. I actually teared up a little at the whole thing. It was beautiful and terrible all at the same time. I have 2 healthy "normal" kids who give me enough grief. My hat's off to those who care for these people. It takes a special person to do that, and I ain't one of them.
My son appears that way in public. I don't know if it's because there's so much stimuli, he's uncomfortable, or what, but I'm sure to onlookers he looks totally dysfunctional. At home, although he can't talk, he communicates and even uses a computer device to play learning games, etc. so many times some of these kids are just withdrawn or taking in what's around them. That's may be why the people tending them were trying to interact as much as they were.

kepp 08-21-2013 01:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 9903885)
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.

Your children teach you so much....
So...serious question. My daughter is 6 years old and (like a lot of youngsters) says/asks whatever is on her mind most of the time. Sometimes when we cross paths with a family with a special needs child she'll ask something along the lines of, "Daddy, what's wrong with him." I'm usually not sure what to say, but will say something like, "Nothing is wrong with him. He's just a little bit different from you." Given your experiences, what do you think would be a good response?

fan4ever 08-21-2013 03:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kepp (Post 9904230)
So...serious question. My daughter is 6 years old and (like a lot of youngsters) says/asks whatever is on her mind most of the time. Sometimes when we cross paths with a family with a special needs child she'll ask something along the lines of, "Daddy, what's wrong with him." I'm usually not sure what to say, but will say something like, "Nothing is wrong with him. He's just a little bit different from you." Given your experiences, what do you think would be a good response?
Actually my wife is a teacher (2nd grade) and we take Lucas to the school carnivals. She explains to those who ask exactly what is "wrong" with Lucas in terms their little minds can absorb. IMO if you are familiar with what they're dealing with, explain it best you can and maybe add "...and his/her family love him/her just as much as I love you".

ThatRaceCardGuy 08-21-2013 03:37 PM
"Sounds reasonable"-DC posters.

Fish 08-21-2013 04:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 9903885)
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.

Your children teach you so much....
Holy shit, that would just rock me to the core. Amazing how our children teach us when we're least expecting it.....

Hog's Gone Fishin 08-21-2013 04:54 PM
That letter is old . It was written to Matt Cassel's mother.

Pablo 08-21-2013 04:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 9904694)
That letter is old . It was written to Matt Cassel's mother.
LMAO

Shit. I thoroughly enjoyed that.

Saul Good 08-21-2013 04:59 PM
That letter is probably fake.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 05:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thatguy (Post 9904533)
"Sounds reasonable"-DC posters.
Aren't you a DC poster?

fan4ever 08-21-2013 05:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Saul Good (Post 9904702)
That letter is probably fake.
I think that's very likely.

fan4ever 08-21-2013 05:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hog Farmer (Post 9904694)
That letter is old . It was written to Matt Cassel's mother.
Um, I think that's an insult to that kid in the letter.

Hog's Gone Fishin 08-21-2013 05:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fan4ever (Post 9904710)
Um, I think that's an insult to that kid in the letter.
Per CP regulations you are in violation of rule 146.3 which states that 3 posts in a row in a single thread are TOO ****ING MANY ! Now shut the **** up !

fan4ever 08-21-2013 05:26 PM
Frankie...here I come Frankie...

Mosbonian 08-21-2013 06:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by fan4ever (Post 9904500)
Actually my wife is a teacher (2nd grade) and we take Lucas to the school carnivals. She explains to those who ask exactly what is "wrong" with Lucas in terms their little minds can absorb. IMO if you are familiar with what they're dealing with, explain it best you can and maybe add "...and his/her family love him/her just as much as I love you".
What he said.....trying to over-explain to a child will only confuse them more. Make the explanation simple at a level they understand and you wil find kids have absolutely no pre-conceived notions that will prevent them from accepting Special Needs peers.

It's when adults get involved that it goes to crap.

Mosbonian 08-21-2013 06:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fish (Post 9904595)
Holy shit, that would just rock me to the core. Amazing how our children teach us when we're least expecting it.....
It stung for a couple of days....and what is worse was having to deal with the wife and her smirk when my child had schooled me.

Pitt Gorilla 08-21-2013 07:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 9903885)
I think in another thread on here I posted the story of when people's stupidity got the best of me while we were on a trip to WDW. I absolutely embarassed the guy in line who made a reference to my son right in front of his family (wife and 2 kids). After it happened I was feeling real good about what I had done when I caught up to my wife and kids. My son....my Special Needs son mind you....looked at me and said "Dad, why did you do that? It's not his fault he doesn't understand. How are you going to make him understand better when all you did was yell at him"

Talk about a reality check....my wife looked at me and smiled....and all I could think to do was find the guy to apologize. My son and I purposely stood at the Exit to the ride so we could meet him and I could apologize to him and his family. When he approached he was a bit sheepish but my son stuck his big paw out and introduced himself...for that moment I felt like the Child and he was the Parent.

Your children teach you so much....
Man, that's badass. Good on your kid.

Mr. Plow 08-21-2013 10:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thatguy (Post 9904533)
"Sounds reasonable"-DC posters.
You are literally the worst poster on this site. You were bad as dottefan, you're worse as Thatguy. That's quite an achievement. Congratulations dumbass.


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