It was a cool, spring day when I saw her, taking out her checkbook at the Hyvee. Bernice wrote out the check for $9.12 and as her hands shook I knew she was the one. When she dropped her pen I reached down to pick it up and when I handed it to her our eyes met. She squinted through her thick glasses and said "thank you". At first I was speechless and then I said "the pleasure is all mine, my lady. Do you...live around here?". She told m$e she did at the new senior center behind the store. I offered to carry her bags for her so that she could manage her walker a little easier. She thanked me and off we went.
I don't know if was the smell of her moth ball clothes are the blue veins on her arms but something got a hold of me that day and dammit, I wasn't going to let go of that lassie. When we got to her apartment she aked if I would like some tea or some vitamins. I said "No Bernice. I have all I need right here" I moved her walker to the side, grabbed her brittle frame, and pulled her close. She stammered and said, "you know Pioli Zombie, I'm nearly 35 years older than you". I said "I don't care. I'm taking you woman!" And we kissed passionately. The taste of polygrip filled my soul and I could feel my loins ready to break free.
It was then that the security guards came in and dragged me away.
But I still remember that special moment with Bernice, and neither her son or that restraining order can take those memories from me.
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Ah HA!!!!

Now I know who you are...........






SKIP!!!

Actually, political correctness is the last thing on my mind. Rather a fascinating journey through the primordial ooze of this message board. I wouldn't change a thing about it. I think it is the greatest cast of characters assembled in one place since P T Barnum's "Greatest Show on Earth".

Keep up the great postings without regard to my insights. Given the tone of the posters here I don't think that any inhibition of your thoughts is possible, anyway.

LMAO:LOL:LMAO

Skiptowne? Nah. He hates me. I think I said he had 2 Gay dads.
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**** it. Age is just another number and I never was very good at math.

8 Years Older

Never with anyone younger.

1 Year older is my lowest.

Whats worse?

A girl way younger?
A girl way older?
A hooker?
reeruned girl by the lake.
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Ahhh another eloquent poster, who see's his role as the transcendent poster. :thumb:

drunk beer goggle, 25 yrs old at the time, did a 45 yr old. she wasnt as cute the next morn, good in bed tho

LMAO

Eight years for me. Bagged a smokin 32-year-old when I was 24. That was wonderful. And my wife is eight years younger than I am.

My wife wasn't isn't born yet. But, currently. I was 25 and she was 18. You guys that checked above 20 years are my heros....as long as they were younger than you.

Actually have gone to both extremes ( had to watch how I worded that one ), was with a 37 y/o woman when I was 18. Was good, but wish I had known what I was doing then, and what I had...lol ahhh the follies of youth

I dated a 45 year old when I was 35 and a 21 year old when I was 30, but I prefer women close to my age. Luckily I don't have a daughter because I'd probably cut the dude's balls off if he was my age and trying to hook up with someone half his age.