Originally Posted by Dante84 (Post 7426859)

Just take a sharpie and color over the camera when she leaves it laying around.

Honestly, though, kids can pick up on sincerity and will respond to the honest communication more than bringing the hammer down. Once you explain what is wrong and what is okay, and make boundaries clear, she will know what will fly and what won't.

If she violates these boundaries, punishment is necessary. Sounds like she doesn't know the boundaries yet, though. So coming down hard on her won't accomplish anything positive, it will just confuse and anger her.

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426852)

But that's just it! What's my fuggin line?
"Don't talk to boys?" That's kinda weak. Especially when we were all doing it around that age.

"Don't kiss boys?" Weak also.

What do I have to stand on... how to you "discipline that"?
By doing nothing though it sends the signal that it's ok and condone and she KNOW's we can't really do anything. We still have that "control/fear" aspect over her... looks like we're losing that so what do we do... just ride and hope that our teachings have been instilled and she'll make the right decisions.

Thing is... My pete peeve is a chick that put guys on fuggin pedestal and her trying to impress this guys show's that she's emotionally weak and that's what I really want to fix here. Thin is... other than showing her examples of idiots and family members, I have no idea what to do.

Originally Posted by Coach (Post 7426860)

I'd simply say "Be yourself. You are beautiful on who you are. If other people or a guy can't see that, then well, that's their problem. Not yours."

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426864)

Great points but you're focusing on the chores too much. She does the chores no problem and is honestly quite good about it. The story I gave was just a story about today. But we have no problem with her and chores... She's actually a GREAT kid, honest, sneaky as we all were, with a good head on her shoulders.

Pictures, I don't think she's sent nekidd pics of anything more than the fat girl lips out profile pose.

But I will make it clear that it's a proviledge. Text was disabled, so she got around that with Skype. Since I've disabled Skype from our network also.

Originally Posted by jd1020 (Post 7426870)

So you dealt with it and then asked for advice? Little backwards thinking there.

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426883)

No... Wifey spoke with her... I'm asking what to do on my end and what could/should we have and can still do differently.

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426872)

So "No Boys" doesn't establish a boundary?

Originally Posted by luv (Post 7426746)

Don't want details? Dating? She's 13!

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426877)

Comeon Coach this is 2011... I think examples will hit home more than the You're beautiful speech.

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426872)

So "No Boys" doesn't establish a boundary?

Originally Posted by Dante84 (Post 7426863)

Damn, that would be tough to kick a grandkid to the curb like that. But I understand what you are saying.

Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 7426877)

Comeon Coach this is 2011... I think examples will hit home more than the You're beautiful speech. It may already seem like I preach to her a lot although it's more related to her sport activities.

Originally Posted by Coach (Post 7426886)

At the same time, the age 13-15 range is when kids are starting to find their own identy, and they are going to start exploring the oppisite sex.

I think the "no boys" rule is a little harsh, but that is me.

Originally Posted by Dante84 (Post 7426891)

Its kind of ambiguous and umbrella-ish. Specifics, and to some degree, reasoning, will help to clarify to her that you have her best interest at heart. Tell her to ask if she's unsure about something... and also tell her that if she's unsure, its probably a sign that she shouldn't be doing it.