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candyman 06-14-2020 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 15020834)

Patriots - Obviously too political. The name has been co-opted by the far right. And patriots are also known for following founding fathers, many of whom were slave holders. (Maybe not so much in Massachusetts, but you get the drift.) And these people framed Native Americans for the Boston Tea Party. No thank you. Boston's identity is through history, so we can hearken back to the past with a name like Redskins or Beaneaters. The more I think about it, probably not Redskins so let's go with Beaneaters. It's race and gender neutral.

Do you really think its sensitive to call them the Beaneaters? What if they have Hispanic players on the team? Maybe they should just be the Boston Football Team.

Rain Man 06-14-2020 06:33 PM

AFC South

Texans. At first it seems innocuous. But Mexican-Americans living in Texas use the term Tejanos, so Texans as a term excludes them. And then you've got that whole history of Texas fighting with Mexico which isn't very internationalist. So let's rework it. What's big in Houston? Oil is, but naming the team the Oilers isn't environmentally conscious. They're well known for bad zoning and mosquitos, so I think Mosquitos could work. But what really scares people about Houston? I think we all know, and it makes for a nice alliterative name. The Humidity.

Colts - Name the team after an adult animal, for crying out loud. Colts will work, but at least be a horse. Are you trying to intimidate opponents or not?

Jaguars - This one is a little risky since it could be seen as cultural appropriate from the Aztecs. But on the surface I think it can stand up to scrutiny since the jaguar symbol isn't wearing Aztec finery or standing on a pyramid. This one can stand.

Titans - Eurocentric mythology. That's a no. Thumbtacks could work, but that's kind of circular logic. You can't go with anything related to country music since that's a redneck thing. Tennessee was a rebellious state in the Civil War, so you have to eliminate any references there. What else is Tennessee known for? Moon pies and goo goo clusters are probably already copyrighted. I'm kind of stumped. Looking through some documents about things that are specific to Tennessee, I see the Tennessee Trillium, which is a very rare flowering plant that exists in only two Tennessee counties. Lacking any other options, I'll go with the Trilliums.

AFC South is now:

Houston Humidity
Indianapolis Horses
Jacksonville Jaguars
Tennessee Trilliums

Rain Man 06-14-2020 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by candyman (Post 15020911)
Do you really think its sensitive to call them the Beaneaters? What if they have Hispanic players on the team?

Hmm, I'm not up on my racial slurs. I thought Beaneaters were universal. I could consider changing it to Boston Lobsters if that wouldn't anger Maine.

candyman 06-14-2020 06:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 15020915)
Hmm, I'm not up on my racial slurs. I thought Beaneaters were universal. I could consider changing it to Boston Lobsters if that wouldn't anger Maine.

I dont think "beaneater" is necessarily a racial slur, but it would definitely offend someone eventually.

displacedinMN 06-14-2020 06:44 PM

Inside the brain of Rain Man must be an experience.

Pasta Little Brioni 06-14-2020 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by |Zach| (Post 15020049)
It is a shitty name and a shitty brand overall but its ours and its not really that bad. Would love to change it but understand that won't happen.

What kind of pathetic bullshit is this??

Rain Man 06-14-2020 06:52 PM

AFC West

Broncos - Technically, this is a gender-neutral name, though it's Spanish origins make it seem male with the 'o' sound. I'm concerned about perceptions. Also, broncos are a sub-type of horse, which makes it non-inclusive. I'm going to have to veto it. We could go with Horses, but Indianapolis already got that. So Denver needs a total makeover. I think it's pretty obvious that it should be mountain related or altitude related. You could throw a white helmet on them and call them the Snowcaps, but that's too white. I'd go with the Peaks.

Chiefs - Technically, this should be good. Chief is a profession that is unrelated to race, and I think to gender. (Is there a feminine version of 'chief'?) But the team has embraced a profession within an ethnicity with its Native American emphasis, so it no longer can stand. You could go with an Oregon Trail theme here and go with Trailers, but that's probably not a great brand image. I don't know if ermines are native to the area or not. I think it's clear that the most famous thing about Kansas City is barbecue, so we'll go with Saucers. You can give it an alien theme if you like.

Chargers - First off, no one knows what a charger is, other than that thing that powers up your phone. The name was a failure from the start. Let's embrace what really makes Los Angeles famous, and what people do there instead of going to pro football games. The Surfers.

Raiders - Pro-crime name, and one can argue that their logo exploits people with facial disfigurements. The name's gotta go. We can't go with their historical runner up of Senors for obvious reasons. Now that they're in Las Vegas, it's time for a complete makeover. What is Las Vegas known for? Hookers, elderly gamblers, Buddy Hackett, buffet meals, runaways who are destined to become hookers - what do we have to work with? We can't go with gamblers since that glorifies vice. Showgirls is fun, but too gender specific. I have to go with the most noticeable thing about Las Vegas - the Lights.

So the AFC West is ...

Denver Peaks
Kansas City Saucers
Los Angeles Surfers
Las Vegas Lights

Jewish Rabbi 06-14-2020 06:56 PM

Why not the Kansas City Anal Rapers? Everyone can be anally raped, and Patrick Mahomes does that to opposing defenses on the regular.

Rain Man 06-14-2020 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jewish Rabbi (Post 15020941)
Why not the Kansas City Anal Rapers? Everyone can be anally raped, and Patrick Mahomes does that to opposing defenses on the regular.

It's an interesting concept, but I think it would be too confusing relative to the east and west coast teams.

Pasta Little Brioni 06-14-2020 07:10 PM

If they would cave they'd be the Kansas City Kucks

Baby Lee 06-14-2020 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 15020935)
(Is there a feminine version of 'chief'?)

https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/...20120903182025

displacedinMN 06-14-2020 08:42 PM

Would still be able to get Chiefs Merchandise?

Quote:

A little more than two-and-a-half years have passed since then-president Robert Kelley announced that the University of North Dakota would make its athletic programs’ nickname the Fighting Hawks, with the majority vote-getter replacing the Fighting Sioux. The outgoing moniker had been in use for roughly 16 years, with the school having altered that from “The Sioux,” a simpler yet nonetheless controversy-causing choice that it had adopted back in 1930. An email spat between current leader Mark Kennedy and the trustee of a foundation that has endowed the university with millions marks yet another chapter in the acceptance, or lack thereof, of the new nickname and logo.

But the real story is the bizarre set of circumstances that has forced the University of North Dakota to keep selling some merchandise bearing the old Fighting Sioux name and branding.

The latest matter in a saga that essentially started in 1999 pits Kennedy against the Engelstad Family Foundation, whose namesake played hockey for the university. More importantly, one could contend, his family’s name appears on the main sites for athletic competition on the Grand Forks campus, with his eponymous spot hosting hockey action and the Betty Engelstad Sioux Center serving as the source for basketball and volleyball duels.

The school president and trustee Kris Engelstad McGarry, Ralph’s daughter, are at odds over what branding should appear on the arena's center court, with Kennedy hoping for the Fighting Hawks logo to have the honor and the trustee favoring the standard University of North Dakota logo to receive the distinction. That would push the Fighting Hawks identifier to the side of the court, a move that Kennedy feels would not help to promote the new branding or move merchandise. McGarry, meanwhile, holds that the "UND" logo would keep at ease fans and supporters who “do not identify with Fighting Hawks" after the logo’s ill-received unveiling.


Her reasoning is interesting and could lead opponents of it to state that, yes, backers do not identify much with the Fighting Hawks image because they still think of, and perhaps admire, the Fighting Sioux insignia more. The second part of that possibility received a bit of credence through an Associated Press report on the spat between Kennedy and McGarry, noting that hockey game attendees still chant “Let’s go Sioux” from the stands.

That navigation between two branding worlds, one would think, figures to become easier as fans become more accustomed to the Fighting Hawks identification. But those who hold dear to the Fighting Sioux moniker need not necessarily become that accepting of the new term, based on a head-scratching decision by the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA).


The governing body for more than 1,200 institutions and affiliated conferences played a huge role in the genesis of the present flap, as it threatened to place sanctions on the University of North Dakota in 2005 if officials did not decide to abandon what was deemed a "culturally insensitive" athletic nickname. Seven years later, residents voted to drop the Fighting Sioux as the program’s signifier, but the NCAA stipulated that the school must continue to make use of the Fighting Sioux brand so as not to lose the trademark. Yes, you read that right. The school, scolded for calling on the controversial nickname, must keep it alive, which it does through its Dacotah Legacy Collection.

“UND is in such a horrible position because of this agreement,” radio host and Fargo-Moorhead Forum columnist Mike McFeely said in a 2016 VICE article on the mandatory measure. “There’s really nothing else they can do.”

Two years after he offered his estimation, five Fighting Sioux products remain available as reminders, one might say, of the NCAA’s lackluster handling of everything. This has been an interesting year for analyzing the lifetime of controversial nicknames and logos, as the Cleveland Indians, who will abandon their Chief Wahoo logo beginning next season, will still market goods with the caricature on them in Northeast Ohio and Goodyear, Ariz., the team’s spring training site.

Sports teams, both professional and amateur, are now more than ever finding themselves needing to address their logo and nickname choices with respect to Native Americans. With the Indians and Fighting Hawks/Fighting Sioux as recent high-profile cases, we wonder if those who favor the complete eradication of such appropriations will one day be able to celebrate a complete victory. Given the scope of copyright and trademark rulings and the money that people can make off goods, no matter how insensitive or out of touch they are, though, they might have to continue to settle for partial wins.

Rain Man 06-14-2020 08:48 PM

"Fighting Hawks". What a horrible name. No wonder it can't get any traction. If they had gone with Ermines they'd be seeing sold-out crowds at every sporting event, and people all over the country would be wearing Ermine gear.

Megatron96 06-14-2020 08:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rain Man (Post 15021075)
"Fighting Hawks". What a horrible name. No wonder it can't get any traction. If they had gone with Ermines they'd be seeing sold-out crowds at every sporting event, and people all over the country would be wearing Ermine gear.

Isn't an ermine basically a weasel or something?

Tribal Warfare 06-14-2020 09:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby Lee (Post 15021057)

Where the **** is that bitch Carmen Sandiego


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