Originally Posted by JPH83 (Post 17383117)

Hi Duncan, my dad passed away on Jan 12th, we had his funeral last week.

It was an odd one as he wasn't around from the age of 10. He worked in oil and gas all over the world and for about 20 years I barely saw him, aside from a couple of killer holidays visiting him in Brazil and the like.

It was weird putting together his funeral service. There were loads of messages from old colleagues saying how great craic he was etc etc and I just thought - well, damn, I'm glad he had fun, but I don't know this guy much at all. There were photos of him I'd never seen, and family ones stopped when we were young.

He came back to live in the UK about 10 years ago from California and pretty much hated it. Covid, divorce from his 2nd wife, boozing all put him down a path. My sister and I tried to intervene but he wouldn't listen. Or at least wouldn't act.

I think he had a pretty good life, but he died way too young (73, his dad lived into his mid-90s). My friends asked me if his dying had made me re-think anything. My only thought, which I've thought for awhile, was that you can live your life without responsibility and kinda selfishly, but you will always pay a price in the end. My mum grinded and now has a great retirement, loads of friends, active etc. My dad didn't and he died sad and lonely, I think.

I feel a lot of things. Guilt for maybe not being a better son, anger, sheer incredulity at his ****wittery at times, obviously sad we never had the relationship we might. It comes in waves. I read a story at his funeral and my sister read a poem, I think we did him justice.

One nice thing was he was a runner. Got polio age 5 and almost died, tried running to build up his strength, found out he was pretty good, apparently. Won loads of cups etc. We found his old athletics club and wanted to know if there were any pics. There weren't, but he still holds the Under-17s records in the 600 and 800ms...from 1969. So, 55 years, think he ran 1.54.7 age 16 or something. Kind of a cool legacy that he's disappointed 55 years' worth of aspiring young local runners who never beat his records!

Anyway, sorry to all for rambling, I hope you're doing OK Duncan.

Originally Posted by duncan_idaho (Post 17383261)

I'm sorry for your loss. There is so much to process, so much complexity of emotion.

The morning yesterday was hard. Really hard. It was the first passing of his birthday without him.

But Mrs. Idaho and I took the twins on an outing yesterday and spent it running around playing laser tag and bowling and playing video games. It was great and I found a lot of peace in it.

Originally Posted by Cosmos (Post 17383252)

First season as well, without my wife of 31 years who passed in June…

She was a Laker fan at heart, but shared Chiefs Sundays with me and our son every time they aired in the LA market.

Never forget our last SuperBowl 2023 hug/kiss.

I know she up there rooting us all on this Sunday.

Originally Posted by Fishels (Post 17384715)

Also just to chime in, I’m 29 years old and have had between 3-5 colonoscopies. I’ve got alot or chronic stomach issues.

They are no big deal. You stay up and poop all night and then you’re put to sleep. You wake up and then go eat your favorite meal if you want. The most painful part is simply a small prick for the IV.


When in doubt absolutely get checked out