ChiefsPlanet
Page 9 of 14 « First 5678 9 10111213 Last »
Show 80 post(s) from this thread on one page

ChiefsPlanet (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/index.php)
-   Nzoner's Game Room (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/forumdisplay.php?f=1)
-   -   Life Who would you rather lose your virginity to? (https://chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=203730)

KcMizzou 03-07-2009 12:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562809)
Ha I like Mer her attitude is great.
Agreed.

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 12:58 AM
I actually agree with Delano.

In fact I'd say by the end of the month.

But for now I'm eating cookies and watching Magnolia. In my underwear.

KcMizzou 03-07-2009 12:58 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delano (Post 5562852)
By the end of the year. Write it down. Print it. DONE DEAL.
THE DEAL IS DONE!

Ok gang,

Mecca 03-07-2009 12:59 AM
Are you just going to finally suck it up and go to a whore house?

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:00 AM
Never. Chicks find me attractive so there's no reason to.

Delano 03-07-2009 01:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KcMizzou (Post 5562857)
THE DEAL IS DONE!

Ok gang,
Post of the year when Clayton does the deed and begins his explanatory post with: Ok gang,

Thread title is of course: The Deal is Done!

ROFL

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562863)
Never. Chicks find me attractive so there's no reason to.
Then what's the problem....maybe they find you attractive in a way you don't realize.

Smed1065 03-07-2009 01:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562860)
Are you just going to finally suck it up and go to a whore house?


No he is going to whine and get SR on his side.

Delano 03-07-2009 01:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562860)
Are you just going to finally suck it up and go to a whore house?
Here's the thing.. the ball is rolling downhill. You can't stop it. Might as well get behind it.

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delano (Post 5562864)
Post of the year when Clayton does the deed and begins his explanatory post with: Ok gang,

Thread title is of course: The Deal is Done!

ROFL
You'd like to think that wouldn't you?

I may not say anything at all.

Then one day someone will make yet another virgin crack, I'll snap and start typing in all caps.

Then Valiant will come in and accuse me of lying, smed will post some unintelligible bullshit and life on the Planet goes on...

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delano (Post 5562868)
Here's the thing.. the ball is rolling downhill. You can't stop it. Might as well get behind it.
Didn't we hear this like a year ago?

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delano (Post 5562868)
Here's the thing.. the ball is rolling downhill. You can't stop it. Might as well get behind it.
http://i39.tinypic.com/f50gp0.jpg

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562870)
Didn't we hear this like a year ago?
A year ago I was 300 pounds and didn't even try.

Smed1065 03-07-2009 01:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562863)
Never. Chicks find me attractive so there's no reason to.


Attractive or feel sorry?


The truth is here. I am a geek, lost weight and now I am a god because I said so from my moms basement. I have social skills like the last 4 years that I proved it!


I am god, just ask skywalker!

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562866)
Then what's the problem....maybe they find you attractive in a way you don't realize.
I don't even know what this is supposed to mean but when chicks tell me they want to **** my brains out and I send them texts saying I want them to ride me like a cowgirl and they don't call the cops, it's clear something good is happening to me...

Smed1065 03-07-2009 01:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562881)
I don't even know what this is supposed to mean but when chicks tell me they want to **** my brains out and I send them texts saying I want them to ride me like a cowgirl and they don't call the cops, it's clear something good is happening to me...
Same as an internet football Guru! LOL


Go DVD!

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562881)
I don't even know what this is supposed to mean but when chicks tell me they want to **** my brains out and I send them texts saying I want them to ride me like a cowgirl and they don't call the cops, it's clear something good is happening to me...
Someone saying that and it actually happening are 2 different things....

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:09 AM
Here watch...

<a href="http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=10336573">TNA Nine Inch Nails music video</a><br/><object width="425px" height="360px" ><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"/><param name="wmode" value="transparent"/><param name="movie" value="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=10336573,t=1,mt=video,searchID=,primarycolor=,secondarycolor="/><embed src="http://mediaservices.myspace.com/services/media/embed.aspx/m=10336573,t=1,mt=video,searchID=,primarycolor=,secondarycolor=" width="425" height="360" allowFullScreen="true" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"/></object>

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:10 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562888)
Someone saying that and it actually happening are 2 different things....
No shit Sherlock. You make some odd ****ing posts sometimes. Try to follow the flow of the conversation.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562893)
No shit Sherlock. You make some odd ****ing posts sometimes. Try to follow the flow of the conversation.
You shutup you, while I pad my post count.

beach tribe 03-07-2009 01:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562881)
I don't even know what this is supposed to mean but when chicks tell me they want to **** my brains out and I send them texts saying I want them to ride me like a cowgirl and they don't call the cops, it's clear something good is happening to me...
Fuqin do it already, and come back and tell us how you told her that "this never happens to me". Unlike the other dudes who use this, you'll actually be telling the truth. Seriously though. Be careful. Wear a condom, and I would even go down there, and check it out if I were you. Chicks in their 30s who are willing to agree to bang w/o even meeting you, have probably had quite a few weenies in there. That said, a condom hardly protect you from shit except HIV, the clap, and what not, if she has HPV, you have HPV. Whether you wore a condom or not.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:18 AM
I got some HPV on my pizza.

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by beach tribe (Post 5562901)
Chicks in their 30s who are willing to agree to bang w/o even meeting you, have probably had quite a few weenies in there.
lol they both want to meet first...there's just no illusion of a potential relationship

wutamess 03-07-2009 01:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by beach tribe (Post 5562901)
Fuqin do it already, and come back and tell us how you told her that "this never happens to me". Unlike the other dudes who use this, you'll actually be telling the truth. Seriously though. Be careful. Wear a condom, and I would even go down there, and check it out if I were you. Chicks in their 30s who are willing to agree to bang w/o even meeting you, have probably had quite a few weenies in there. That said, a condom hardly protect you from shit except HIV, the clap, and what not, if she has HPV, you have HPV. Whether you wore a condom or not.

80% of sexually active people have some form of HPV. Having said that... I'm sick of hearing about your near misses with the pussay.

Could you get it over with please? Stop being a fuggin drama queen about doing something you should've done a decade ago.

beach tribe 03-07-2009 01:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by wutamess (Post 5562937)
80% of sexually active people have some form of HPV. Having said that... I'm sick of hearing about your near misses with the pussay.

Could you get it over with please? Stop being a fuggin drama queen about doing something you should've done a decade ago.
Damn, no shit? I thought it was around 40%.

beach tribe 03-07-2009 01:32 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562921)
lol they both want to meet first...there's just no illusion of a potential relationship
Dude you're hooking up to bang, are you not. They will have to meet you to bang you. There's no way around that one.

KcMizzou 03-07-2009 01:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562910)
I got some HPV on my pizza.
Add a dash of tabasco. It's a nice combination.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:42 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KcMizzou (Post 5562972)
Add a dash of tabasco. It's a nice combination.
Well I was trying to see if you could pull off that big sausage pizza site in real life.

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by beach tribe (Post 5562948)
Dude you're hooking up to bang, are you not. They will have to meet you to bang you. There's no way around that one.
It's not like it's a done deal....i might not like them in person, they might not like me who knows?

luv 03-07-2009 01:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562989)
It's not like it's a done deal....i might not like them in person, they might not like me who knows?
You're thinking about it too much.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:52 AM
Just don't talk about star wars.

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 01:53 AM
no shit? really?

greg63 03-07-2009 01:54 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by luv (Post 5562995)
You're thinking about it too much.
I think that's the first time he's ever been accused of that.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:55 AM
Jesus Christ relax I was trying to be light.

greg63 03-07-2009 01:58 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5563009)
Jesus Christ relax I was trying to be light.
It's probably his testosterone level, he must be saving himself for one of the two women.

Mecca 03-07-2009 01:59 AM
I think he should find a nice girl who cries on speed bumps.

greg63 03-07-2009 02:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5563020)
I think he should find a nice girl who cries on speed bumps.
Whatever reduces the risk of carpel tunnel.

ShortRoundChief 03-07-2009 02:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562804)
You know I put my picture in a celeb look alike thing and it said I looked like Johnny Depp as captain Jack Sparrow.
Did you pay for this? Get your money back tonight.

Valiant 03-07-2009 04:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562989)
It's not like it's a done deal....i might not like them in person, they might not like me who knows?

Hey first rationally correct thought you posted so far in this thread..

When you get smart enough to quit coming to the forums for advice on sex stuff then you will be learning and finally closer to becoming a normal man..

Rausch 03-07-2009 04:25 AM
Life is like a buffet: try and get a little taste of everything before you push back from the table and walk away...

Pioli Zombie 03-07-2009 06:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5561842)
OK, so I leave to go meet my mexi-milf at, IRONICALLY, a mexican restaurant. She wants a margarita. Whatever. I want her tits.

So I'm driving out there and pissing around at the grocery store next door waiting for her. I get a text and she's getting cold feet. Tells me this feels out-of-character for her.

I offer to just swing by her house for a drink if she feels more comfortable with that. She was like LOL no I am not letting some stranger from the internet in my house. Whatever. I ask her if she wants to call it off today and she says yes.

So, when the going gets tough, the nerds go to the movies. I went to go see Watchmen, alone LOL, and it was, like I said, AWESOME! Lots of cool stuff, lots of glowing blue penis shots, and hey, I even got to see some tits and ass, so it was almost like getting laid.

Of course, in a rather amusing turn of events, right before the movie started, she complained that she was all alone in a text. WTF? YOU JUST STOOD ME UP! WHAT ARE YOU WHINING ABOUT, WOMAN? Then she sent me a picture of her cleavage. Woohoo, thankyou. What are you trying to do, give me blueballs?

Then I'm driving home from the movie, checking my messages, and she sent me one saying she was there at 3:07 (note that the movie started at 3:30 and she exchanged a text message with me right BEFORE the movie) and it was "my loss."

WTF? She went ANYWAY? WHY DIDN'T SHE TELL ME EARLIER?

So basically, WOMEN. WTF MATE?

But yeah, the movie was AWESOME!
This one is a classic. She'll play with your head because it gives her the feeling of control but she'll never give out. Tell her to screw herself.
Posted via Mobile Device

Katipan 03-07-2009 07:30 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5562749)
They all look like Heidi Klum in the dark.
I've tried moaning in an Austrian accent. Sounds like a cat.

Quote:
Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5562756)
Play your cards right, luv, and you too could kneel towards mecca 5 times a day.
haahahahahahah

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts (Post 5562783)
Katipan is the best option, but he's already said he's racist against asians. They're dim sum is slanted or some such.
Thats a benefit. I bet its the round faces and no eyelids.

Quote:
Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5562800)
Mer would be counter-production. He'd end up ****ed all the way into a monastery high in the himalayas, curled into a tight fetal ball, sobbing uncontrollably.
He'd be one disciplined sore happy man.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mecca (Post 5562804)
You know I put my picture in a celeb look alike thing and it said I looked like Johnny Depp as captain Jack Sparrow.
hmmm. "Welcome to the Caribbean" "Savvy, love?" Makes me wiggle in my seat every time I watch it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DeezNutz (Post 5562805)
Women don't have a "type." That's how you see that ****ing supermodel married to Seal. Yeah, that's her type. Sure...

My guess is that he unfolds a 10 inch cock, and *that's* her type.
She says she saw him walk across the room wearing nothing but bicycle shorts and fell in love... I'm sure she's found many reasons to stay with him. They look like a Will / Jada Smith kind of couple. But I bet it was the 10 lb summer sausage hiding in his shorts that got her.

whoman69 03-07-2009 09:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5562989)
It's not like it's a done deal....i might not like them in person, they might not like me who knows?
You sound like the fatasses at work who whine about how they can't go to the gym. You are the sexual equivelent of a fatass.

Skip Towne 03-07-2009 09:42 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delano (Post 5562556)
Yeah. She is gorgeous. I'm not sure how she hooked up with the fat douchebag of a husband though.

Is she pure Mexican? I think she has freckles and that seems un-Mexican.
I can't find any good pics of Veronica either but if anyone wants to see her she is on A&E in about 20 minutes (10 AM)

The Buddha 03-07-2009 11:56 AM
Don't feel bad Claythan. The girl at my work who's been messing with me (or trying to), told me last night she she wants to make out with me really bad, and that I make her panties wet. And yet, she has a new bf... :?

Stay away from trying to figure out women. I've just been doing this for about a week now, but I'm stopping trying. LIke when she said she wanted to make out with me, I just said, "I know." fuck all this playing along and games and stuff.

When she pulls all that drama crap, just do what you did. Tell her its no big deal, and that you just made other plans. Stop chasing, and just enjoy life.

88TG88 03-07-2009 12:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by J Diddy (Post 5563046)
Did you pay for this? Get your money back tonight.
LMAO

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 02:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pioli Zombie (Post 5563107)
This one is a classic. She'll play with your head because it gives her the feeling of control but she'll never give out. Tell her to screw herself.
Posted via Mobile Device
I'm not playing her game. If she wants the dick, she knows how to get in touch.

easymobee 03-07-2009 04:08 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5563788)
I'm not playing her game. If she wants the dick, she knows how to get in touch.
If you listen real closely, you can hear another layer of dust settling down and adding to an already hefty 28 yr accumilation on a certain chronically unused and neglected appendage.

You've found a couple of craigslist style girls from the no strings attached section online, and you are still having a harder time closing than most guys would with a situation that didn't include the ever present green light.

Pay for it already, and then don't post about it.

Ps make sure the escort you choose gives you the full hour, not just until you are done. Otherwise she'll/he'll be making something like 9000 per hour if the math is done right.

Posted via Mobile Device

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by easymobee (Post 5564069)
You've found a couple of craigslist style girls from the no strings attached section online
That's not where they came from.

Also, I've only even tried with one of them.

easymobee 03-07-2009 04:21 PM
Also, I think he is subconsciously sabotaging himself. First sign of trouble (or sign that an extra effort on your part might be required) and you give her an easy out and then go to the 1st available movie? I think he was relieved when she showed the hesitation. That's natural and understandable, but you can't expect these girls to chase you down and rape you, its not a porn movie.
Posted via Mobile Device

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:24 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by easymobee (Post 5564104)
Also, I think he is subconsciously sabotaging himself. First sign of trouble (or sign that an extra effort on your part might be required) and you give her an easy out and then go to the 1st available movie? I think he was relieved when she showed the hesitation.
Posted via Mobile Device
Hey, if she makes a date and then bails at the last minute, that's not my problem.

Especially since SHE contacted ME first.

stevieray 03-07-2009 04:28 PM
geez, buy a hooker and get it over with already...or is this all just another look at my sorry ass non existent drive around the block three times love life game...?

this is played out..you ever wonder that you kill your own chances by posting all this info about chicks you meet on the web? let's not pretend that you have respect for these girls...

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevieray (Post 5564125)
you ever wonder that you kill your own chances by posting all this info about chicks you meet on the web? l
No one here has any way of contacting either of them.

stevieray 03-07-2009 04:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5564131)
No one here has any way of contacting either of them.
that's not the point..you're being less than honest with them....you think if they knew they'd be impressed?...

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevieray (Post 5564134)
that's not the point..you're being less than honest with them....you think if they knew they'd be impressed?...
Give me a break. Guys everywhere talk about chicks they're trying to bone. The two I've described could be almost ANYONE. Get off your high horse.

stevieray 03-07-2009 04:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5564142)
Give me a break. Guys everywhere talk about chicks they're trying to bone. The two I've described could be almost ANYONE. Get off your high horse.
..uh huh..and she bailed on you...karma

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevieray (Post 5564152)
..uh huh..and she bailed on you...karma
Karma is bullshit.

stevieray 03-07-2009 04:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5564156)
Karma is bullshit.
and so are your chances..

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 04:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevieray (Post 5564167)
and so are your chances..
That is a hell of a thing for you to say!

StcChief 03-07-2009 04:43 PM
was it the Large "L" on your forehead or what?

whoman69 03-07-2009 05:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5564172)
That is a hell of a thing for you to say!
And yet it rings true.

MIAdragon 03-07-2009 05:45 PM
Where in the hell are you meeting these skirts?

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 05:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MIAdragon (Post 5564448)
Where in the hell are you meeting these skirts?
I found them both on the same site, ironically. One of them found me, actually.

keg in kc 03-07-2009 05:50 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5564466)
I found them both on the same site, ironically. One of them found me, actually.
chickswithdicks.org?

Pioli Zombie 03-07-2009 06:11 PM
Plentyofbullshit.com
Posted via Mobile Device

keg in kc 03-07-2009 06:19 PM
300pounderswhosoundhot.net

unothadeal 03-07-2009 06:24 PM
will****forhighlightvids.org

Hammock Parties 03-07-2009 06:28 PM
thread burst +1

KcMizzou 03-07-2009 06:29 PM
www.fatchicksinpartyhats.com

Hog's Gone Fishin 03-07-2009 06:33 PM
One of them may actually be Ultra Peanut. You know that right ?

keg in kc 03-07-2009 06:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KcMizzou (Post 5564610)
Know the difference between this and the earlier websites?

We made them up. And you're sharing a bookmark.

Hammock Parties 03-10-2009 09:50 PM
The hispanic girl tried to call me the other night at like 10:30 (I think I posted that on this thread, actually). Anyway, here's her explanation.

Quote:
probably was calling for a booty call...LOL..just joking, I dont know, dont remember, guess I was pretty toasted.

keg in kc 03-10-2009 10:19 PM
Someday you're going to regret missing out on that action.

Hammock Parties 03-11-2009 10:20 PM
SHIT. THE OTHER ONE FOUND RELIGION?

WHAT THE ****?

**** YOU GOD.

rockymtnchief 03-11-2009 10:27 PM
Dang, you're driving women to celibacy now? You must be contagious! :)

Rausch 03-11-2009 10:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claythan (Post 5574709)
SHIT. THE OTHER ONE FOUND RELIGION?

WHAT THE ****?

**** YOU GOD.
That was kid of George Carlin's thing.

He died a bitter, angry, empty, drug addicted hotel tab welcher.

Dream bigger basement Jedi...

Hammock Parties 03-11-2009 10:30 PM
At this point, when I'm on my way to actually get laid, a bus is going to piledrive my car and I'll be killed instantly.

The universe doesn't want me to get laid.

Mecca 03-11-2009 10:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rausch (Post 5574726)
That was kid of George Carlin's thing.

He died a bitter, angry, empty, drug addicted hotel tab welcher.

Dream bigger basement Jedi...
Hey no ripping on Carlin.

keg in kc 03-11-2009 10:37 PM
There's always hookers.

keg in kc 03-11-2009 10:39 PM
FYI, that "found god" thing is probably woman-speak for "you moved too slow and I'm ****ing another guy".


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:21 PM.
Page 9 of 14 « First 5678 9 10111213 Last »
Show 80 post(s) from this thread on one page

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.