Worst you've ever been chewed out by a coach.
 

Those of us who have played for coaches have likely, at some point in our lives, endured the miserable experience of having a coach melt down on you for a real (or imagined) grievance.

I was playing sweeper for my high school soccer team and swooped through an attacking play by slicing away with the ball. In doing so, however, a couple bodies fell as there as a conglomeration of players descending on the spot from which I had swooped. This was in the penalty box, and any penalty called on us in the box results in a penalty kick, which is not awesome in soccer.

I get subbed out in a minute and the coach tells me, as I walk to the bench, that I made a mistake that led to me having to swoop and potentially cost us a PK. Exhausted and not thinking straight, I said "I didn't touch anyone" with my arms out, as if to say "WTF are you talking about."

This apparently was a gross offense, as the coach slowly rose from his seat and dressed me down. This was in Joplin, who had a rinky dink soccer field, and everybody in a 10 mile radius could hear the guy dressing me down. All I could say was "yes sir" 18 times to stay in his good graces. I was subbed back in 5-10 minutes later.

That's probably the worst I got. Surely some of you guys can beat me. Let's go.

I got yelled at multiple times for not being physical enough in the post. I was a center in high school basketball. I was tall for my age but I was skinny and my skillset was more suited to play the 3 or a stretch 4.

Had a yoga instructor get pissed that I dicked her down better than her boyfriend

In high school, I was a freshman on the wrestling team. The coach had a No Parties Policy.

A senior was caught at a party.

We had to go to the gym on a Sunday for a special practice. First, Seniors, Juniors, and Sophomores did burpees while the Freshman did a bear crawl across the gym and back, and then each class would go, so by the time the Seniors went, they had been doing burpees for a long time.

However, when the underclassmen were bear crawling, the coach would call them out and make them start over if someone didn't do it correctly.

That was just the warm ups. It got worse.

At the end of practice, the coaches suggested that the team should have a wrestlers only meeting in the locker room.

I can tell you that the aftermath of that meeting is not a single Junior, Sophomore, or Freshman went to a party for the next 3 years.

Coaches from st joe worked from 4 am to 4 pm at factories and when they got off they drank and were primed to whoop that ass at missing the cutoff man

My baseball coach yelled at me during a game and called me a "walking pile of pig shit" and that was when my folks drove up to watch me play.

Son of a coach, so yeah

Had our football coaches in 7th grade pull us in a circle, chew our collective asses over something insignificant and then storm off and leave practice leaving us alone for 2 hrs because nobody had a cellphone on them in 1997.

That was a weird one.

I got called every name in the book during one of my high school football games right in front of the players’ parents section.

I was the TE and our WR didn’t check his alignment with the ref. He was on the line. We both ran routes on that pass play. I got called for ineligible downfield on a critical third down that we converted. Then, didn’t convert on the second try and had to punt.

Our dumbass coach was red faced losing his shit on me. I tried to explain it wasn’t my fault but he just kept going. The parents, who obviously understood what happened, looked confused. A few even yelled at him to stop.

By the end, I was trying not to laugh.

I don't get chewed out by coaches. I chew out coaches.

I had great coaches in High School. I watched other players get yelled at for stupid shit and realized quickly it was easy not to get yelled at if you did what you were supposed to.

I guess really the only story I have was my senior year playing baseball. We had a coach that was a pitcher in high school and decided he was going to throw live BP to us one day. He was so confident that nobody could hit him that he wasn't going to use a net or anything.

Granted this was my first year playing baseball, and I weighed about 120 pounds soaking wet. We had a team loaded with talent, and I worked my ass off to just make the varsity squad. He probably thought he was going to embarrass me.

I stood in the box and this guy threw 3 pitches that were about helmet high, which I didn't swing at. He made some kind of comment about how he was going to stop throwing if I wasn't swinging. The next pitch was dead center and I hit a screaming line drive right up the middle and hit him square in the thigh.

He was done pitching after that. Another coach drug out a net and threw BP to everyone else.

I had a very heated wrestling match in HS. I was too wound up going into a match…like fist fight, brawling mad when I walked on….at some point I did a 1 point Gramby and landed on my feet facing my opponent. The ref stopped the match as I went for the follow up shot……he had called me pinned on the roll through.

It was horse shit…and I said something to him. The home crowd got on me…and I responded to someone walking off the mat. I regretted it as soon as it happened…I knew it was a bad look. I lost a match, and an extra team point for my team, and some respect from a rival school.

Before I got off the mat, our coach had me by the throat with both hands…he lifted me off the mat by my head and carried me to the wall that he then slammed me against….off the ground. I don’t know how long I was levitating but it was long enough to feel his thumbs touching in the middle of my throat.

I don’t know what he said…but I know his eyes had blood in them and cotton balls of spit were ejecting from his mouth. The message was clear. Never embarrass myself, my coach, my team or my school with my actions.

I knew I was wrong, I knew I deserved it and I knew I was going to apologize to the ref and the other wrestler before it even started. I learned a valuable lesson about self control that night.

Today, I’m friends with that opponent and the coach would die for any of his wrestlers today. He helps my son today….but age has taken a lot of the edge off of that war horse.

I got yelled out (and my helmet slapped) during two-a-days one year in high school when our head coach was trying to see who should be on our punt return team. I was quick enough, and fast enough to be a tackle (head up on a guard) in a 6-1 Monster defense. I could also sub at tackle on the offensive line, but I was NOT fast enough to be on the offensive line that set a wall for punt returns...I just couldn't maintain the speed our coach wanted for more than 30 yards no matter how good of physical shape I was in and no matter how hard I ran. I was good enough to letter my junior and senior year for defense, and could play the front line on our kick return team, but NOT our punt return team. EDIT: this was either in 1987 or 1988...

Silent disdain while they were concentrating on the kids who they were actually going to play in a game.

But in fairness, the football coach at my high school wasn't bright enough to string together a full sentence, so who knows what he was really thinking.