Tell us the story of your first time
 

How did you lose your virginity?

Bang your 8th grade teacher? Hire a hooker? Drug the prom queen?

Inquiring minds want to know. Give gochiefs something to look forward to.

Ask your mother.

With a chick who I would probably rate a 4. I was 18 at the time and just wanted it over with....so I settled.

I'm glad you got in first with this response.

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With a chick who I would probably rate a 1 or 2, although to this day one of the nicest women i know. I was 16 or 17 and just had to see what all the fuss was about.

We appear to be a very sexually repressed bunch lately.

Drive in movie. Back of a VW Bug.

After a high school bball game.....in my truck.....down at the park.

I shot a load on the way out of the womb
and my tongue hung out and got rug burnt

It was aweful. Just aweful. Couldn't understand what all the excitement was about. :shake::(

In my basement on the weight bench in 9th grade. I was 15, so was she. Red hairded gal with nice bod (most are at 15). Very awkward. She had to say "I think you are supposed to move around a little". So, Gochiefs, if you are ever "there", makes sure to move around a little so as not to cause you 26 years of wondering if the girl ( or guy in your case perhaps) thinks you were a bad lover.

this sounds like it's straight from a movie but...

sophomore year of high school, i had sex with a norwegian foreign exchange student, who was a junior, in the back of my mom's mini-van

Thanks. Thanks a lot!

so very true.

Jewish Rabbies sister in his bed when I was 14.

I remember it like it was yesterday. The year was 2008 august 5th or so

16 years old, she was 15. We were together for about eight months at that time, so it wasn't a random.

I asked if she wanted to have sex and she asked me if I had a rubber. I was just kidding when I asked her. My mouth dropped and two minutes later I was asking her if she wanted to do it again.

I'd also like to add that I did NOT own a motorcycle at the time. Which explains the reason she was a 1 or a 2.

Carry on.

Duct tape, ball gag, rope, chocolate syrup ... you know, the usual.

17 with a good lookin girl with big tits.... Ugly veiny tits though:Lin:

17. She was a coworker at my summer job and had a smokin' body. Face? Ah, not so much, but she was feisty to say the least.

oh, and this thread is total midnight_rapist bait... things could get interesting when he shows up

I think "quick" would be the best description.

I bet he started taxing neighborhood babes at six-and-a-half.

14 with a 16 year old goddess in my bedroom with Duran Duran playing in the background.

I was... not very good.

Oh come on! We all know noontime_parakeet is such a P-I-M-P that he never even had a first time. He came out of the womb phat pimpin'!


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I was 18. She wasn't bad (a 5 or 6 or so), but she gave me the clap. I remember thinking that sex wasn't worth it. LOL

i'm just a n00b... but claythan isn't actually a virgin, is he?

He can't decide wether or not skull f**ing a road-killed deer counts. Once he does, you will have your answer.

I heard Jewish Rabbies are the worst. A lot worse than regular rabbies. (More shots I presume) ROFL

ROFLROFL

it was me, my penis, one lucky vagina, and 5 seconds of heaven. well at least purgatory.

I was probably 15 - red-headed cousin of my best friend who was 18 or 19. She had some experience, heh. She had a rockin body and a face that wasn't as good but she was at the upper end of the red-head echelon. It was pretty awesome. She wore me out many, many times. Then my best friend's mother came in the next morning cussing, saying, I KNEW IT. I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN. Heh. That was the beginning of a long, sexcessful career for me. Sadly, I don't even remember her name.

even your best friend's mom knew she was a slut.

I know for a fact Sedated roofied some bitch

Heh. I should give her credit for allowing it then, no?

Did anyone else have the frequent misfortune of being caught in the act by the female's parents when they were young? It happened to me dozens of times, although mostly with the same girl. I think she had some kind of "I want my parents to catch me doing it!" kick, though.

I didn't care at the time, but now it is kind of icky to ponder.

Only time i ever got caught was when we were in the car and the police showed up.

well...i think i've told this story before, but:
i was 18. she was 17. we'd gone together for 3years. always talked about it and had decided to wait til she graduated high school.

the deed was done on the 4th of july. we found out she was pregnant on the 2nd of august. were married on the 13th of september. had twin sons on the 5th of february(two months premature).

sec

Yes. That is unpleasant. My girlfriend in high school got hammered at a football game one night and said that she wanted to blow me. We went to her car and got in the back seat, and she proceeded to get to work. A few minutes later, there was a tap on the window. A cop was standing there shining his light on her. I tried to stop her but she kept going until the end.

grape gatorade wasnt available?

Once, only it was MY parents.

:eek:

My mother used to come downstairs with loads of laundry: "Donger! I'm coming down!!"

Gee, thanks Mum.

Never their parents but I got caught with one girl quite a bit. I believe she liked it. Her aunt caught me once, the police caught us once, and she was quite bold about getting naked at her parents house when they were home. They never walked in or anything but they had to have known. Right?

I got caught alot with a gal I dated for 4 years prior to my wife. She was 19 and I was 21. Once at her house she was babysitting and while the baby was asleep she was riding me on the couch. In comes the baby's mom and I have my shorts around my ankles and she is sitting on me with her skirt up. Mom simply says "gotcha. You better go home". Never another word. I feel bad for laying the pipe in front of a sleeping baby, but I had very few scrupples at that point in life. Also got caught by cops with the same gal in the car. They just wanted to see ID and make sure she wanted to be there.

that wasn't just "some bitch". It was the first time for us both, and we will remember it forever. I will anyway.

You should have waited 2 more days for the shotgun wedding.

to the temple or in the mouth

18, parking lot of the bar called the "American Tap" in Ft. Dodge , Iowa. She was blonde that was about a 7. Average body but did she get very very wet.

No, for the 15th.

Where are the gay threads and stories ?

at least i didn't get the clapp. so i had that going for me.
sec

not like the chick at the bar.

midnight douchebag hasnt posted yet

???wtf, henry?
sec

Chicks dig virgins with motorcycles

Vacation bible school..... the priest was gentle.....

Katie Horner is calling for Flash Floods all over Southest Kansas

WERE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your dad was brave and didn't cry at all
until his wife shooed them off the porch with a broom

Yeah. Me too. It was pretty funny, though; my GF & I put it on tape... an early VHS camera. 3 years later, my mom calls me, LAUGHING HER ASS OFF, saying, "Guess what videotape I just found"? Ugh.

blueballs to sex
is what barack obama is to democrats
a train derailment waiting for a crowd to watch

Lost it when I was 16. To a girl that was freakin obsessed with me. Ended up dating her for awhile too because she did whatever I wanted and was okay with it haha

Too bad Claythan wont be responding to this thread hahahaha.

your mother is like bo
liberal
popular
and for sale

My first time occurred during a family picnic. I got hammered and had to go to the port a potty. My mom starts knocking on the door outside and said, "Jerry, are you ok?"

When I didn't answer, she opened the door, saw my pants down and said, "Hey, big boy, do you need any help?"

Anyway, one thing led to another and I got to know my mom in a way I never imagined. Jesus forgave me, though.

You bastard!

WTF :Lin:

I was 16 and I did it in the bed of a Chevy s-10 truck with a porker co-worker. It didn't last long after I found the hole.

Fixed it for ya :thumb:

ROFL:shake:

tags could have made this thread great

Its a joke. Jerry Falwell famously sued Larry Flynt (founder of Hustler) for publishing a liquor ad about "Jerry Falwell's first time" which included him getting drunk, and doing it in an outhouse with his mother.

The libel case went to the supreme court, and found in Flynt's favor. (U night have seen the movie, People vs. Larry Flynt).

Does it count as your first if you were drunk as f**k and can't hardly remember it much? I was 17. I was at a party, got wasted, and decided to wonder downtown to the arcade. Seeing the shape I was in she decided to take advantage of me. I'd rate her as a 8 1/2. She is still pretty hot to this day. I can remember her telling me I had to pull out because I didn't have a rubber. Seemed like it lasted a few minutes, but she said she didn't think I was ever going to cum. I dunno, I count the 2nd time I had sex as my 1st. I was sober and it was with my future ex wife.

Holy shit

We were both 14 and had been dating for 6 months... We had done everything else and figured we might as well give it a shot.
It was amazing and it lasted about 5 seconds. That was the first time that I had ever ejaculated... I had sex before I ever masturbated. Strange?

We were the first couple in our grade to have sex -- I was a pimp to the boys and she was labeled a slut by the girls... Isn't high school great? :rollseyes:

To this day, we are great friends.

Holy shit almost my story to a tee only she was a 7 and I was 16 and it was all good until I had to go to the clinic and stick a focking long metal swab into the head of my d!ck and then she was a #$%@#$% bitch

Heh,happened to me once too,we were in 69,faces buried in each other's crotches and kept hearing this tap tap tap and thinking wtf,imagine my surprise when I saw the beam from the flashlight.

Just like LocoChiefsfan, mine may have been when I was so inebriated at a party I have no recollection of it.

I only know I did because half of my school hammered me about it for the next couple of weeks.

Oddly enough, the first time I do recall was in a caboose- a real train caboose that was turned into a little recreational bar by this girl's dad. He had it sitting in the backyard. It was pretty cool. She took me out there during her party and well, one thing led to another.

My second experience occurred on a boat during Spring Break my senior year.

I didn't actually have sex in an actual bed until I was in college. Well, except for the first night that everyone in high school seems to know about but me.

Oh yeah. NOW I remember the Q-tip of Steel. Thanks for reminding me. :cuss:

It was in the back of my GF's '86 Mustang hatchback. Behind a tobacco barn.

Accompanied by the smooth sounds of Motley Crue, and helped by some pretty warm beer.

I was 16... she was 17.

It was magic... magic, I tell ya.

I hope you understand now...


If not, you're doing it wrong. :D