Steve Smith's guide to baby punching
 

Holy shit

STEP TWO: SCOUT THE BABY’S WEAKNESS

STEVE SAYS: “You can’t just go punch a baby right away. You gotta watch them for a bit, so you can pick up on their tendencies. No need to rush. Like this one time, I noticed that whenever this one lady said HOORAY to her baby, the baby raised her arms. That opens up a great path for your fist. So then I went up to the kid and said HOORAY! Then the baby raised her arms and I went BOOM BITCH! Dropped that baby like a damn stone. DAMN, THAT’S GOOD BABY PUNCHING. If that baby didn’t have a shit in her pants before then, she sure did afterwards. AND IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, I WILL KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP.”

STEP FIVE: RUN

STEVE SAYS: “You have to be able to run fast, because the second you punch that baby, the crowd is gonna react. I like to run wind sprints all spring long to keep my calves strong. That way, ain’t no mother out there that can catch me. All they can do is yell and say, ‘AHHHH WHY ARE YOU PUNCHING MY BABY?! WHAT KIND OF MAN PUNCHES INNOCENT CHILDREN?! WHY? MY BABY! MY BABY!’ That’s funny. I PUNCHED YOUR BABY BECAUSE YOUR BABY LACKS HEART. SHE WAS JUST LAYING THERE LIKE A LITTLE BITCH. I’M IN THIS LIFE TO WIN! YOUR BABY JUST GOT OUTCLASSED!

“You got a problem with how I do business? No? Because I’ll ****ing drive a car over your ****ing parents if you do. DO NOT **** WITH ME. I AM NOT A NICE PERSON.”
ROFL

Steve Smith and his son were standing on a hill, and in the valley was a bunch of babies.
Son says "hey dad, how 'bout we run down there and punch one of those babies." Steve says, "no son, let's WALK down there and punch them all!!!"

ROFLROFLROFL

That was F***in hilarious

yes

ROFL

Why do I not find this the least bit comical?

Steve Smith punched your baby? Or you were punched as a baby?

You know why Helen Keller was a bad driver?















'Cause she was a woman...

Not sure TGG, but i have the same feeling.

Toughness is in the mind
not the body
challenge the kid to a spelling bee

What's brown and rhymes with snoop








dr dre

What's green and smells like paint?


Green paint.

When duck fly in a V why is one side always longer than the other?






Because there's more ducks in it.

Steve Smith say its baby-mashing time. ROFL

Is there a story behind this or is it just mindless chatter?

I'm just guessing, but over time on the internets, Steve Smith's little guy with a big ego persona has been morphed into a little thuglifer who takes his compact rage out on the only thing he's bigger than, babies.

Here's hoping, this time around, explaining a joke all of a sudden makes it funny.

Works for me.

Its Big Daddy Drew, numbskull.

I won't say the joke, only the punchline:

Depends on how hard you throw them.


It's quite possibly the most inhumane awful joke ever (and yes, it makes me laugh)

Now I have to hear the joke.

For some reason I'm thinking.....

How many babys does it take to paint a house?

Wow, you are close, it's How many babies does it take to paint a wall. But house could work too.