How did you wake up today?
 

Poll to follow. Stay alert.

1st in:
With a Boner

No poll needed, I woke up at the awful, Army-like hour of 5am to the screeching of my old clock.

Dammit... I was gonna say that... :sulk:

I should edit though.
It was my Boner

To a supermodel waking me up for Round 37 /CP

ROFL

You forgot 'sticky, broken, and confused'

He meant your boner too.

I also realized that I missed, "by a pillow being pushed down hard on my face". My apologies.

Having to piss like a racehorse should be an option...

Oh, good point. Maybe just vote for the damp sheets option in that case.

We have far more alarm users than I expected.

I was thirsty... so maybe that was the booze....

No knock warrant by the militarized police department where they threw a flash bang grenade into my son's room. That is like the 12th time this year. Somebody should do something about the out of control cops.

Woke up breathing, so it could be worse.

My wife turning on the shower. Then again by my alarm clock 30 minutes later.

I heard that native americans used to drink lots of water as a natural alarm clock when they wanted to get up early the next day.

I set my alarm for 5 am. Thankfully, I woke up at 4 am because I had to piss!

2nd

I'm fighting a severe upper respiratory infection. Regular breathing is fine, deep breaths, coughs, sneezing hurt like a son of a bitch. Constant headaches, body on fire.

Woke up this morning, got myself a gun.

With a smile. Duh.

I would've guessed that the traditional native american lifestyle didn't involve early morning appointments. Maybe that was on fishing days, though.

I woke up three times between 4:30 and 6:30. First was my wife waking me up because I was laughing my ass off in a dream. Second was my wife snuggling up to me and making me hot (temperature of course), and the third and final blow was the alarm clock.

my dogs decide around 5:30am it's a good idea to all lay against me all tight. our room is nice a cold every night and by about that time they're ready to get warm.

so about 150lbs worth of dog flop down next to me - but basically so close to me that they move me.

I love them to death, but sucks being dead ass asleep only to have a dog /dogs flop down nearly on top of you

I usually wake up whenever I feel like it. Usually around 10am to 1230pm depending on how late I stay up. When I do set an alarm, I just use my cell phone

Okay, NAS.

I need to pick two of them, I woke up having to piss a half hour before the alarm was supposed to go off. I should have just got up at that point but chose to go back to bed for that half hour only to be woken up what felt like immediately by my alarm clock.

Battling other tribes IIRC. Get the jump on the enemy.

Also, Buffalo Hut had great AM specials.

Or by a phone call. That happened to me today but it was the first obscene phone call I ever received on my cell phone from some random unknown number. Came in before my alarm too. Two of them one with a picture. I had to threaten them to stop as they kept coming in.

By my kids. Just like every day. To early. For years. No end in sight.

Woke up at midnight to take a piss. Woke up at 2 am because one of my cats was in my face to let me know their food bowl was empty. Woke up a little after 3 because the wind was howling and knocked over the snow shovel on the porch, which is right under our bed, and woke up at 4 am when the alarm went off, though I snooze alarmed until about 5:15.

I woke up at 7 to a 5 day old going "b b b b b BLAAAAHHHHHHHH BLAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

Dealing with an issue at work, woke up to thoughts of that. At 3:30 AM. :cuss:

Cat attacking my feet.

Wow, he let you sleep in.