Hypothetical: Get reincarnated here.
 

Just for fun, I've been dividing the world up into regions, and just finished last night. I divided the world into 16,789 regions based on states, provinces, communities, islands, arrondissements, or whatever else happened to be handy.

I didn't know what to do with it, so I created a reincarnation simulator. Sign up here and learn about your next life in advance. I'll give you:

Gender: (Male or Female)
Intelligence: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Attractiveness: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Economic Status: 1 to 100, with 100 as the top
Nation of Future Birth
Region of Future Birth
Population of that Region (which is somewhat useless since the boundaries are generally manmade, but hey, I've got it)

All statuses are relative to the region that you're in, not the world. So if you draw a 50 on economic status and you're born in the Badghis regions of Afghanistan, that means that you're at the median status of Badghis residents.

Sign up below if you're interested in the early release of your next life. I'll do three reincarnations per day, with the goal that we can discuss and decide which of the three has the best future fate awaiting them. Feel free to post pictures, maps, or descriptions of the reincarnated person's life as you see it.

So sign up below and we'll do the first three today.


Methodology: All figures are random. The probability of being born into a particular region is based on the population of that region.

Yes, please.

Oh, swami of the great beyond, whatever shall be my fate?

Sure, but I doubt my next life will be as good as my current one!

Please sign me up. Gonna do everything different this time.

Kill me and bring me back to life.

Okay, we have our first reincarnation.

Gender Female
Intelligence 20
Appearance 44
Wealth 34
Nation India
Region Rohtas
Population 2,959,918

You will be a lower middle class, average looking woman in central India, who's not particularly bright.

Do me do me

Do me as well.

You're a big fish in a small pond. Very bright, good looking, make decent money, and male. Plus, I think there are beaches where you'll be born.

Gender Male
Intelligence 93
Appearance 75
Wealth 62
Nation Brazil
Region Litoral de Camocim e Acaraú
Population 316,534

If I'm a woman, I just hope to have really great boobs.

Life is easier if you have great boobs.

Our third and final reincarnation of the day is ...

Gender Male
Intelligence 65
Appearance 23
Wealth 71
Nation Canada
Region Alberta
Population 4,196,500

A rather homely male, but reasonably bright and solidly in the upper middle class. Dress warm, but enjoy your hockey and beer.

I should build that in.

I'm ready for a change.

Eh, should be pretty easy to extrapolate.

Let's face it, if your intelligence is low, your appearance is high and your wealth is above average....well it's either raw luck or a great rack that did it for ya.

And if your nation of origin is Brazil, then really it removes all doubt.

No thanks, but was just wondering if the word "hypothetical" was really necessary in the thread title?

These are fun. I'm in!

Well. I think I certainly have the worst outlook of the three today.

I imagine that this is magichef's commute to work:

http://indiatransportportal.com/wp-c...n-in-India.jpg

and his town looks like this:

http://im0-c75.kxcdn.com/0//NEXT/NEX...udra334040.jpg

3 a day?

https://media.giphy.com/media/iSxPmDWr97248/giphy.gif

You need to remember that there is a contingent of planeteers who may actually believe Rainman is God.

This would've been a lot easier for you had you just typed "standard Canadian". It would've pretty much filled all the gaps in nicely.

Looks like I'm penciled in for an early Thursday rebirth. I'll be there!

Pretty nice beach here for a guy to read philosophy and flirt with women.

http://wanderingtrader.com/wp-conten...ara-Brazil.jpg

On a middle class income, you're not living on the beach, though. You're probably in a neighborhood like this:

https://www.google.com/maps/@-2.9112...8i6656!6m1!1e1

I feel like Misplaced Chiefs Fan won the damn game in the first round.

It's hard to top 'Good looking genius making solid money in Brazil'. Because let's face it, the girl that changes your tires is probably super-model hot down there. ****ing Brazil....

The largest town in the region is named after a demon. Here are some sights:

http://photos.wikimapia.org/p/00/04/07/36/42_full.jpg

http://travelenlightenment.net/wp-co...4/DSCN1645.jpg

I'm guessing that your nice income will land you in a nice neighborhood in Calgary, maybe something like this:

https://www.google.com/maps/@51.0170...8i6656!6m1!1e1

You'll have plenty of room since you won't be dating much.

Yeah, MCF may have won that round. He's not going to make as much money as amnorix and I bet there are a lot of bugs in that area, but a good looking guy in a beach town in Brazil is not a bad fate. Hopefully he doesn't sunburn easily.

Magichef isn't going to have a great life. I'm guessing his economic status places him above untouchables, but not in a high caste. And as a woman in India, he probably shouldn't ride the bus very much.

I must concede that old-timey India really had some good concepts in architecture. You'll enjoy them as you ride by on your scooter.

As a plus, my life expectancy is probably pretty low, so I should be reincarnated relatively soon. Hopefully my luck is better on the second try.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/-f1DNyngKVY" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Well the good news for Magichef is that he'll get to go back in line fairly quickly.

I can't imagine the life expectancy for a ugly, stupid, poor person in India is all that great. After a few decades of living in squalor and producing ugly children (for almost certainly uglier men), she'll mercifully shuffle free of her mortal coil. Probably from cholera. I wonder if the flies or the feral cats will eat her eyes first. But then again, as bad as you have it, there's pretty much always someone that has it worse.

Unless that person has great boobs. That person never has it worse than you do.

In!

With MCF's intelligence and looks he hasn't done much with it in the wealth department. He seems lazy and unmotivated. He can't even afford a beach front home despite the advantages given to him. Odds would suggest there are uglier and/or less intelligent people with a much nicer place to live than MCF.

Is this simulation run on a normalized distribution for wealth and appearance? Is the region weighted by population? Tell me about this system.

I suppose that a realistic curve for wealth would need to be tailored to the region.

Maybe the future MCF is so good looking and smart that he doesn't really need money to be happy. Either that or maybe he has a drinking problem.

Me! :P

The regions are indeed weighted by population. The other simulations are done just on a pure random basis, so you'd need to figure out the median for each region. I'm guessing that future MagicHef's lower middle class in central India is a long way from future Amnorix's upper middle class in western Canada.

Ok I'm in. Hopefully I'm not reincarnated as a bomber pilot lost in a time warp. :D

It's like Real Lives, except you don't have to pay for it.

I'm in. Sign me up

Yo Rainman hook me up

I want to play!

Ok I'm in...Ready for a change...

Oh hell yes, I'm in.

Im in.

Reincarnate me

Where's the snow?

Do me when you get time. Thanks!


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Hit me!

ROFL

I'll be dead before it's my turn to be reincarnated, but go ahead and sign me up.

I'm in! Kill me Rainman!

I'm in provided there's an update on Sandbox.

Alberta = Texas North.

What will I be in my next life m lord

Nice try L. Ron...

Please reincarnate Clay as Alex Smith, I beg you.

Brighter than average and wealthier than average. I should be able to land a decent chick with that to help keep the winter nights warmer. And I'm in Canada, which is waaaaay ahead of most of the rest of the world.

I'll take it. Even if I have the nose of Jimmy Durante and ears like Dumbo...

The good news is that your below average looks might keep you from getting raped as often as you otherwise might.

I might need something more secluded. With my looks and above average wealth, I might be looking at some kind of monthly subscription plan with an Escort service... :shake: :(

So I want you all to know that if any of you turn out to be smoking hot chicks located in some awful country -- there is a standing offer of marriage (pre-nup required) from a well-to-do, intelligent, pleasant, funny, but rather ugly fellow residing in lovely western Canada.

Mail order bride your way out of hell and come to Calgary.


http://calgary.csc-dcc.ca/img/conten...arySkyline.jpg

Just hope they don't ask for a photo.

As the first of today's three reincarnations, we have wazu.

Gender Female
Intelligence 36
Appearance 64
Wealth 54
Nation Yemen
Region Al Hudaydah
Population 2,300,179

He'll come back as a pretty good looking if slightly dim middle class woman in western Yemen. Hey, good luck with that.

I doubt that your middle class income will give you waterfront property, but it seems like one of the better cities in Yemen. You know, if that helps.

http://city4.учпроект.рф/images1/al-...ah-yemen-7.jpg

I may need to backtrack on my 'great boobs' request.

I kinda realize now that I'm pretty sure women in 3/4 of the world get raped a lot.

Or at least I sure think Wazu is gonna get raped a lot.

Feeling a wave of appreciation for my current life, now. Thanks!

Pestilence is next, and comes into the world as a well-connected if otherwise dull male deep inland in China.

Gender Male
Intelligence 33
Appearance 46
Wealth 85
Nation China
Region Dazhou
Population 6,156,954

At your income, you might have waterfront property. It's got some weaknesses, but still better than most in the area.

http://images.china.cn/attachement/j...116091ae16.jpg

BWillie is our third reincarnation of the day. We roll the dice and he enters the world as a working stiff in Queens whose strong talent is held back by his morbid obesity.

Gender Male
Intelligence 88
Appearance 22
Wealth 62
Nation United States
Region NY - Queens
Population 2,230,722

You can likely afford a single-family home in Queens in about this range. Plus, you're convenient to the city to go to shows.

http://ap.rdcpix.com/1759223583/fd70...0_h480_q80.jpg

I think bwillie may be the winner today with his humdrum existence. Pestilence has some money so he's probably reasonably okay, and wazu probably can't leave the house so we'll never know about him.

Can I use that money to move to America?

Wazu will be passed around her own family, then the one she's ransomed off too for 3 goats, 6 chickens, and a pound of copper wire.

You're high enough up the food chain you probably could.

:cuss::cuss::cuss:

It's hard to find numbers, but I'm going to guess that your income is probably about $4,000 a year. So you might want to remain a big fish in your pond.

Three per day, my friend. You'll die soon enough.

This entire thread is mostly a reminder that one of the absolute best things to ever happen to us was the fact that we were born in the USA.

Glad to see he has a ramp so his caretaker can push his wheelchair up to the front door.

Yeah, hit me up on this.

I've got a feeling that I'm either going to be like Albert Brooks in the movie Defending Your Life where he sees himself in a past life as a tribesman running from a lion, or I'll end up being a ball turret gunner on a B-17. If it's the latter, we're going to have words.

I suspect that will be a conclusion. But for me, another fun part of it is the opportunity to look at some regions of the world that I would never normally look up, and see what they're like.