**** Green Bean Casserole!.....and other fun Thanksgiving discussions.
 

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, I just wanted to take a moment and say **** your GBC and anyone who swears it's the premier side dish at any Thanksgiving dinner.

90% of the time it's ****ing canned cream of mushroom soup, canned green beans, and processed fried onion straws. ****ing garbage. And even when people try and church it up with fresh ingredients, it can still eat a bag of dicks. It sucks. Case closed.


That being said, I love you all, and want to hear about your Thanksgiving dishes. What are your favorite sides? How do you prepare your turkey? If you don't do turkey, what is your main dish?

Did yall know that SNR prefers semen over both Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip?

Green Bean!!!!!!!!

I'm actually not a fan of turkey but we're going to try a smoked turkey this year. Typically I prefer a nice honey ham.

Mac n cheese is the only side I truly give a shit about. Love mashed taters, broccoli and cheese is good, stuffing is great, but if there's no mac n cheese, I ain't showing up!

Thanksgiving was last month you weirdos.

For some reason i read the thread title as "Ever **** a green bean casserole?"

I'm deep frying a turkey for the first time this year.

I agree about GBC. I wouldn't even teabag it, because I wouldn't want that filth on my balls.

If you don't like green bean casserole, you can KISS MY ASS

I don't mind turkey, I just don't cook it for Thanksgiving. Prime rib > turkey.

"Cannot ban moderators or administrators"

Hell yeah **** yeah. Ham before turkey, even.

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I make it every year. To me it's not Thanksgiving without the traditional dishes. Turkey, dressing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes and turkey gravy, rolls, corn and green bean casserole are all must have dishes. Anything other than those staples are ok if someone wants to bring them.
Ham is for Christmas

OP's points were not only valid, but T R U T H! Green bean casserole is heinous. Might as well serve liver & onions & a big bowl of boiled spinach, aka pond scum, as well. ****ing vile.

Turkey, dressing (sage dressing made from white bread & chicken stock w/ lots of celery & onion = the tits!), mashed potatoes & gravy. Staples for the Thanksgiving feast. Everything else is secondary (although the cheesy potato casserole is damn close to a staple dish). A couple of years I have made Michael Mina's roasted brussel sprouts. They stink to high heaven but dear lord are they good.

Turkey prep = rotisserie frier. Peanut oil. So good.

See to me Thanksgiving is more about getting together with family and having a special meal and to me a bird that sells for $1-$1.50 a pound is not special.

The fact that it was at the first Thanksgiving and that I only make it once a year makes it special to me. To each their own though. I know a lot of people who hate pumpkin pie, but that one or two slices I eat a year makes it special to me too. It's just not Thanksgiving without certain things

Good luck with the deep fry. Don't nuke the ****er when you first dip it in, lol.

And step your ass out of line for the rest of us to tear into some gbc.

Go back to Canadia!

I learned to smoke a turkey a few years ago, and it really is the way to go for me. I love both smoked and fried turkey, but I'm much more comfortable with the smoking. Prior to trying it those two ways, I was never excited about eating turkey for Thanksgiving.

Mac and cheese is always the go-to for me as well, if it's there, but I'm also big on mashed potatoes. I also think most folks could up their game if they made homemade bread or rolls. Seems a lot of people just buy the pre-made rolls and call it a day.

Wouldn't even **** one with Lewdog's dick.

Glad to hear it. We’ll be foregoing the ham altogether this year so it’s smoked turkey or bust.

You make a good point on the bread/rolls, though I have to admit, I am a sucker for those Hawaiian sweet rolls! Slap a couple of those bad boys on my plate and I’ll never complain.

It'd have to be a super unique recipe for me to change my stance.

This year's Turkey Day menu;

- Roasted Turkey, brined for 24 hours
- Fresh Green Beans, while I am a fan of a good GBC most of my family is not so I acquiesce to them
- Homemade Cranberry Sauce
- Homemade Cheddar Biscuits
- Roasted Sweet Potatoes, with Maple Syrup & Bacon
- Mashed Potatoes
- Homemade Pies, Pumpkin & Chocolate Cream

I only need 4 things for Thanksgiving dinner - but I need each in massive amounts:

1. White meat turkey (I'm racist when it comes to turkey and chicken)
2. Light brown gravy
3. Stuffing
4. Mashed potatoes

Mix them all together on the plate, dowse them in ground black pepper and go to town. Shocking how much of this I can eat. Only 185lbs, but I can eat like a 400-pounder. Could put away 3 full plates of this with zero effort.

I did too, and my answer is YES!!!

I'm down for some trashy GBC, no regrats.

The must-haves for me though are homemade noodles, similar to spätzle, and key lime pie.

Man, I love Thanksgiving. Including the green bean casserole. I'm a bigger fan of a glazed ham than turkey. But a brined and smoked turkey can be pretty good too. Pies. Add in all the football and naps. Usually a pheasant hunt. Always a huge selection of wine and whiskey. Mmmmmmhhmmmmmm...

https://i.imgur.com/lpx5IfE.jpg

I made version from scratch a couple years ago and it was awesome, but I'm fine with all canned as well

Its not Thanksgiving without it in my family

But you do you :p

Yeah, I have the smoked turkey pretty much down, I will say find a way to brine it, which is harder with a giant ass bird, but I just went and bought a cheapie big cooler and said, this will be used for nothing because I'm not confident it will ever be clean again but that's how I do it.

In order for it to be pretty right, you have to keep it <40 degrees. Which is fine if you can get it in some container and in the fridge like all these sister****ers that are doing it with 10 lb birds and saying SUPER EASY HERPDERP. But yeah, don't know how many you are serving, but brining is worth the time and effort.

That being said, I ****ing hate turkey. I knock out a good one and it's fine, good even, but I do have a cursory understanding of microeconomics and I can't get around the opportunity cost concept and if I'm going to fire up the smoker, at least let me cook something I want to cook. Ya ****s. But NOPE nobody ever gives a **** what I think.

And that's probably part of the reason I hate turkey is I'm a miserable son of a bitch for the holiday get togethers. I genuinely cannot stand my **** sister. Wifes sisters all treat me really good, but that fiasco has 35 people at it and getting them all fed with 5 girls with 10 peoples worth of ADD floating around, is just a nightmare.

So yeah, giant holiday get togethers just don't trip my trigger.

If I could do something with the wife and kids and my parents and then maybe another one with wife and kids and her parents, there would probably be much less baked in resentment regarding the food, but when I'm starting from a position of, "I'd rather eat a bullet than this meal." It's hard to come up with happy thoughts.

All that being said, fresh bread is fantastic. My **** sister found some pumpkin rolls with cream filling in there (I'm sure my mom is buying them now) that are wonderful.

Home made whipped cream (don't be bitches, just take the 5 minutes to whip cream sugar and vanilla and do the shit right) make whatever desert better (not a big pecan or pumpkin pie fan).

I'm a sucker for proper mashed potatoes - I never make them any more, because frankly, I need to spend those calories elsewhere, and it takes FOREVER to cut and boil potatoes, then mash them then gravy - blah blah blah - but they're good on occasion.

Stuffing, with whatever they put in it to make it good is legit.

Green beans are delicious. GBC is vile, disgusting shit.

Spatzle and key lime pie? What the **** kind of thanksgiving menu is that?

I dunno what it is, if they've changed the cream of mushroom soup, or blatant incompetence, but it seems like when I was a kid, GBC was a nice firm caserole and had seasoned beef in there and was passable.

Seems like whenever I get it these days it's a runny mushy catastrophe. I

I've never been a GBC fanboy so I don't pay any attention, so I'm open to whatever, but that's been my experience.

Every year, I fry a Turkey (except last year, I tried one and smoked one, and all agreed fried was better)

At any rate, we also try different things w/ sides to spice it up a little. I don’t mind “traditional” sides at all, but the variations we have come up with are pretty damn good. Our “menu”:

-horseradish and sour cream mashed potatoes (simple play on the regular)
-cornbread stuffing w/ sausage and fennel (again, simple variation)
-collard green gratin (sub for GBC)
-Thyme roasted parsnips and apples

All goes very well with the fried turkey

This is legit gamechanging for me. Gonna try it this year. I'm happy I made this thread now.

You just wanted to hear me bitch about my **** sister. ROFL

Just use a stand mixer. It takes a next level mother****er to do it with a wisk.

Also if your bowl is cold (we put ours in the freezer) it will whip faster and stay fluffy longer.

I spatchcocked*** mine, so brining the flattened Turkey wasn’t too terrible…..also felt that it mad the smoking process much easier, as the flat Turkey cooked more evenly than keeping it whole and having air in the cavity. Curious to know if you do anything differently when smoking it

***jokes ensuing

**** green bean casserole.
When I was a kid and too young to fix my own plate, I’d sneak that nasty shit under the table,hoping the dog would eat it. And if there wasn’t any dog, I’d do it anyway and blame it on my little sister.
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Unless something has changed with that particular vegetable since I was last forced to eat it about 40 years ago, you can take that dish and shove it up your ass.

Give the key lime a whirl. I was turned onto it a few years ago and never went back.

Light, refreshing and brightens up the heavy, rich sloppiness of Thanksgiving food.

Theory is it will cook more evenly - you don't have to overcook the thighs to get the breast done.

I know people that swear by it but haven't done it. Some guys I know swear by it. I've never had trouble with the thighs gettting too hot.

Hyvee does make a good meal, if you want to go that route.

Ugh, I cannot stand green bean casserole. And green beans are delicious if fresh and cooked right.

I volunteered to make GBC one year and made fresh green beans instead and caught shit from everyone, so I guess I'm an outlier.

This year in my family somehow corn was turned into corn casserole, mashed potatoes were turned into mashed potato casserole, and obviously we can't have regular (delicious) green beans so that will be in casserole form too.

The only non-casserole items on the table will be turkey and stuffing.

This may make for a decent poll.

I was the first to bring mac N cheese to Thanksgiving and did so for a few years, then mentioned it to someone else and they said mac N cheese isn't a Thanksgiving side.

Not that I care what people think and sides can be anything we please, but I assumed our family was missing a critical, classic side forever before I brought it. Apparently its not the staple that I thought.

Man...I wouldn't think a poll is needed on that one. I've always figured Mac n Cheese as a Thanksgiving side dish. [emoji848]

I was thinking about running a sweet potato pie vs pumpkin pie poll, though.

[emoji23]

Thanks for the advice, man. Definitely gonna give it a go. Probably once before Thanksgiving as well, just to make sure it turns out.

More good advice. Thank you!

Spatzle noodles ****ing rock, man.

This is the most I've ever seen of timbone since I've been here.

I like Ocean Spray jellied cranberry sauce that's shaped like the can when you plop it into a bowl!

Im pretty much forced into baking a sweet potato casserole every year. The fam reminds me of it a solid month in advance. That and the Ham. Those are the two things im tasked with every year.

This may be the whitest thread on CP. Any kind of casserole in general is just the whitest shit ever lol

They're a Thanksgiving tradition on my wife's side.

When I first saw them on the table I was like damn these people grew up poorer than I did, couldn't even afford potatoes. Then I had them and pretty much stiff armed all other sides and loaded up on them. It was a mind blown food moment for me.

We do a fresh cranberry "fluff" that was Mom's specialty but my SIL has to have the canned cranberry sauce too. Since Mom passed we haven't had Thanksgiving with her (she said before Mom died that she would be glad to not have to have those big dinners anymore) so no cranberry sauce for us.

Our Green Bean casserole has tater tots.
I like tater tots so much they can even be in Green Bean Casserole and I will eat it

****a please.

FTR I like basic green bean casserole, but if you're ok with a little (or a lot) more effort, the NY Times has an absolutely killer recipe that my family insists I make every year now.

I'm half German so making spaetzle is in my blood. Even when I was dirt poor I could make a filling meal for next to nothing. The first time I cooked for my then girlfriend I made Spaetzle, rouladen with a homemade red wine sauce and a salad. We'll be celebrating 28 years together , 25 years of marriage in may

That’s exactly the reason why, but I wasn’t certain how valid a reason it was. I will say that it does make carving it pretty easy as well, and takes virtually no time to do it, so I’d do it again in all likelihood

Not a fan of the GBC but I love green beans. Not real interested in the cranberry relish dish either

I can take or leave GBC I'd rather have fresh green beans seasoned and cooked in bacon fat with a can of beef broth diced onion.

Ill smoke a turkey collect the fat to separate the bone broth for gravy and pour rest over the Pepperidge Farms stuffing. Do the corn casserole thing. I pulled a Texas Roadhouse clone of there rolls off the internet. My wife will make a pumpkin pie for the kids with homemade whipped cream and a cherry for me.

Will eat turkey sammies for a day or two then grind rest into a mince to make turkey salad then be done with it for a year.

GBC is for the young cooks in our family. It's OK and makes them feel like they made a decent food contribution. More than bringing rolls, etc.. They'll move up the food ladder as they get older.

Oh, and I saw that Costco sells GBC in the frozen food section. Yowza!

Why doesn't the ignore function stop you from seeing that person's threads?!?!?!?!

LOL. Fair.

Hell that maybe what I remember as GBC from my youth. Maybe GBC is something else entirely and I’m a dumbass. :shrug:

Like I said I could take it or leave it.

GBC is not my jam.

But my family only begs for one form of cranberries. This recipe doesn’t sound like it should work, but taste buds everywhere say that it works great.

Cranberry Salsa

1 bag cranberries
1 big onion
3 jalapeños, seeded
1 bunch cilantro
Put all above in Cuisinart & chop up but don’t purée

Add
juice of 1 lime
sugar - 3/4 - 1 cup
oranges - 4 or more - cut up small or use a can of mandarins (don't put in food processor cause it just makes OJ)


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Yeah, I can see that working out

I mean, it's not chitterlings, but green bean casserole does have its place

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GBC needs encapsulated in a jello mold and shot into outer space as a warning to visitors.

Dang, bruv. Chitterlings!?! You went straight for the throat there LMAO

I have never had chitterlings, for the record, but my dad says they're good.

Casserole is certainly a contender for whitest shit ever, but I'd also like to nominate vanilla bean pie and mandals.

Ranch dressing says hold my La Croix

Oddly enough, I have. If you like shit flavored rubber bands they're alright

Raisins in potato salad.

Pineapple in coleslaw

I didn't realize there were so many people, so pissed offed, at the food served at their Thanksgiving dinner.

Who the **** has ever done this? That’s serial killer shit

I will eat a little bit of everything. Even stuff that’s not my favorite. I just need deviled eggs and candied yams

Fax is one of the nicest people I know, but years ago he gave me all kinds of shit for suggesting raisins in cinnamon rollsROFL
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And I love turkey, but the best part is the neck.
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