Hear ye, hear ye! The monkey trial is about to begin!
 

As a long-time observer and poster on Chiefsplanet, I have noticed a wee bit of conflict recently between one Mecca and several other posters. The conflicts have been escalating, and I think it's time that the Chiefsplanet legal system stepped in.

I am declaring a monkey court to be put into place for the purpose of placing Mecca on trial. As a known neutral party, I shall serve as the judge for this trial. The charges are:

Charge 1. Treason in the first degree for predicting a poor season for the Chiefs.

Charge 2. Treason in the first degree for citing that the Geathers hit on Trent Green was innocent and non-fineworthy.

Charge 3. Treason in the first degree for citing that the Rolle face mask was not an act of evil visited upon a Chief by an opposing player.

Charge 4. Threats to kill other Chiefsplanet members in the interest of protecting animals.

Charge 5. General mayhem.

Additional charges may be filed by the prosecution before the trial begins.

By participating in the trial, all parties agree that the rulings of the court will stand, unless for some reason they don't want to listen to the court.

Over the course of the next few days, the following will take place.

1. Mecca may appoint a lawyer to represent him, or he may choose to represent himself. The lawyer need not be a real lawyer. He may also choose to have a larger defense team if he wishes, but the lead defender will be the only official voice.

2. The opposing side will choose a lawyer to represent them, or if none can be chosen, I shall select one. The lawyer need not be a real lawyer. Might I suggest that candidates nominate themselves in this thread, and I will then create a poll, with the largest votegetter being selected as lead prosecutor. The prosecution may also choose to have a larger prosecution team, but the lead prosecutor will be the only official voice.

3. I will request volunteers with possible actual legal experience to serve as my backroom legal team in running the trial. Any attorneys want to volunteer for this task? You cannot be part of the prosecution or defense, or be a potential witness for either side.

4. A random selection of Chiefsplanet members with more than 500 posts will be solicited for jury duty. We will then work with the prosecution and the defense to select the jury.

5. Then...the trial begins.

I would advise both sides to begin preparing their legal teams immediately. Jury selection will begin later this week.

(Banging Gavel)

Hey Rainman,

Longtime Lurker, First Time poster, here.... Uh, as a witness who has sat on the sideline watching idly...

I have to say that Mecca's only real contribution was the hot chicks he used to have in his signature, and the 8500 pages of animated gifs that he posted.

that is all, I think im impartial enough to be a juror.

Sounds too time consuming, otherwise I'd love to represent Mecca.

Motion to dismiss the judge based on previously stated opinions on charges 2 and 3 aforementioned.

The court appreciates your correspondence. All jury notices will be distributed randomly, and if called, we appreciate your civic duty.

same charge, differt infractions............

Motion denied, on account that the attorney making the motion does not represent either side in this case.

(Gosh, this was my worst nightmare. I'd hate to be kicked off the case of the century.)

um, .....you quit feeding the greatest thread ever.................

I'd like to be "randomly" selected to sit on this jury please.

It's out there now. No telling when a real attorney will spring it.

Thank you for your correspondence, and your interest in this case. If you receive a jury notice, we will appreciate your civic duty.

Can you do the monkey trial in a kangaroo court? I think that would be best.


-Amicus Curiae

How did that not get 1,000 posts? I'm amazed. It had everything.

if i volunteer to be a juror(sp?), if my county calls me in for jury duty can i just tell them i was a juror for chiesplanet court, and that will excuse me?

I nominate KCTitus as prosecuting attorney.