I hope my flaccid, embarrassing penis breaks inside my mom
 

He gets staff infection in it and dies. I then hope his soul is forever tormented by Freddy Krueger as Krueger repeatedly rips out his intestines 3 times a day for eternity. ;)

Breaking News:

Immediately following the game in San Diego, Kansas City Chiefs General Manager John Dorsey said, "It's really just terrible luck that we have to play a starting NFL Quarterback next week."

Peyton Manning was harassed all game by the San Diego Chargers, and the Officials did what they could to make sure Kansas City's goal to face all backup quarterbacks could be secured by not throwing flags on anything. Refusing to be named, one NFL Official said, "We definitely wanted to keep San Diego in it, so we threw flags whenever Rivers fumbled the snap. We assumed keeping the game close would be the best way to keep Manning under fire."

When reached for comment about having to face a starting NFL quarterback, backup quarterback Alex Smith said, "Well there was that one time I threw two touchdowns in a game, that was pretty insane. I think I even had over 100 yards."

Andy Reid did manage to finish a pile of uncooked pasta in time to comment on the game, stating, " Well, the Denver Broncos did fail to reach their 5 touchdown minimum this week, so there's that."

With Manning: Denver 41, KC 19
With Oz: Denver 24, KC 17

I think you'll fit in nicely here.

Give me some positive rep bitches. I need to get out of the red.

Can we get a mod in here to adjust the title to "Peyton Manning's leg"? Thanks.

For some weird reason I can't rep you, so I did the next best thing and reported your post.

Why I can't I neg rep eitooh skcus?

Stay classy, Denver fans.

wow anybody can start a thread here...
guess we are do for an influx of donk idiots

Tebow doesn't rule, matter of fact tebow is terrible.

http://southparkstudios-intl.mtvnima...in_bat_dad.jpg

then maybe, quit being an Idiot... Bitch

DJ, with one leg and one ball, would still start on every NFL team-Knowshitsarchenemy

Do I smell the potential for a weekly article in this a la "10 Things?"

Its a major commitment, but I'd read an Onion: Chiefs Edition article every week, if done well.

who is Derek Johnson?

Banned! Stay down, bitch.