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-   -   I'm on a mission to shit (https://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=283786)

Hammock Parties 05-20-2014 12:05 PM

Midday update: explosive flatulence results in nightcrawler-sized offal.

Johnny Vegas 05-20-2014 12:33 PM

I believe in the power of blueberries. I was clogged up for days and ate blueberry pancakes at the local diner. First time in my life I shit so much my shit was past the water line a good 2 inches. It was a geographical phenomenon, like a newly discovered island in the ocean built from the depths of active volcanos.

Dayze 05-20-2014 12:36 PM

prune juice? I have exactly 2:24 to drink then get to the bathroom.

Pasta Little Brioni 05-20-2014 02:22 PM

How many courics?

Mosbonian 05-20-2014 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThaVirus (Post 10640355)
Heh.

I thought these were black jokes until I read Mosbonian's post.

I can help you test the theory....

Go to Wal-Mart and buy the already prepared 2 liter bottle of Grape Kool-Aid. Spend the next 2 days drinking nothing but that with your meals.

You will spend the next 2 days wondering if all you ate was lettuce and broccoli.

htismaqe 05-20-2014 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mosbonian (Post 10641112)
I can help you test the theory....

Go to Wal-Mart and buy the already prepared 2 liter bottle of Grape Kool-Aid. Spend the next 2 days drinking nothing but that with your meals.

You will spend the next 2 days wondering if all you ate was lettuce and broccoli.

It's the blue dye, which for some reason comes out green.

I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but spend a couple of days eating Boo Berry cereal for breakfast. It does the same thing.

Mosbonian 05-20-2014 02:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htismaqe (Post 10641127)
It's the blue dye, which for some reason comes out green.

I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but spend a couple of days eating Boo Berry cereal for breakfast. It does the same thing.

I think I'll pass on the Boo Berry...it was a bad enough experience when I was young that now if I am at a party that has a drink there that is grape in color I leave.

Hammock Parties 05-20-2014 02:41 PM

Afternoon update: Almost entirely without warning, a fecal slurry ejects itself from my rectum. I now must treat every quiver of my lower intestine as a possible warning sign of explosive diarrhea. Htismaqe officially added to my list of "People to Kill."

Side note: I haven't shat thrice in one day in a long time.

htismaqe 05-20-2014 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Count Zarth (Post 10641162)
Afternoon update: Almost entirely without warning, a fecal slurry ejects itself from my rectum. I now must treat every quiver of my lower intestine as a possible warning sign of explosive diarrhea. Htismaqe officially added to my list of "People to Kill."

First of all, it worked, did it not?

Second of all, I warned you!

Hammock Parties 05-20-2014 02:46 PM

I'm kidding, of course.

I wish I had a scale. I feel tremendously light.

ThaVirus 05-20-2014 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htismaqe (Post 10641127)
It's the blue dye, which for some reason comes out green.



I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but spend a couple of days eating Boo Berry cereal for breakfast. It does the same thing.


Ohhhhhhhh balls! That may be it.

I bought a box of Crunch Berries cereal right around the time it started. I finished it a couple days ago and now my poo is brown again

Gee willikers!

htismaqe 05-20-2014 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThaVirus (Post 10641182)
I bought a box of Crunch Berries cereal

That's it.

htismaqe 05-20-2014 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Count Zarth (Post 10641181)
I'm kidding, of course.

I wish I had a scale. I feel tremendously light.

You're welcome! :D

ThaVirus 05-20-2014 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htismaqe (Post 10641199)
That's it.


That's crazy. I've never had that happen before.

Science, bitch!

htismaqe 05-20-2014 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThaVirus (Post 10641208)
That's crazy. I've never had that happen before.

Science, bitch!

The red dye they used to use back in the 80's was worse.

There were several alleged cases of intestinal bleeding that ended up being discoloration caused by this:

http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3367/3...249d40e9_z.jpg


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