ChiefsPlanet - Life Brain Tumor

So, that shit is fun.

Started having some really cool and powerful deja-vu at work on Tuesday, then a strong ominous feeling set in and then started seeing small, flashing rainbow colored lights under the brim of my hat. Figured that it was either a premonition about an earthquake (like animals get) as Salt Lake City sits on a fault line, either that or I was hitting a major fatigue wall as I had been working long hours and had been hitting the gym pretty hard while not getting as much sleep as required in addition to cutting carbs from the diet. Anyway, I got a little freaked out, went to the bakery, grabbed a croissant and detoured it and everything kinda went back to normal.

Later on, started getting the deja-vu again (and it was super good shit - like I was seeing the future and shit - and it even had a soundtrack going along with it), and that's about all I can remember. Apparently I turned to the guy next to me, said something about tripping my balls off massively and told him I was going to puke, then my eyes rolled back into my head and I passed out and hit the floor like a sack of potatoes.

Came to with the EMT dude holding a ice pack to the back of my mellon on a huge goose egg. They were going to call an ambulance to take me to the ER and I told them it was nothing and I was fine. Fortunately the HR guy was standing there and convinced me to go to the ER. When I got there they did a CT scan to check for concussion probabilities.

Dude came back into the room with the radiologist and said "Um, bad news. There is a mass in the right side of your brain and we want to do an MRI for more detail."

"Well, shit."

So they did that and sure enough, there is a golf ball sized mass sitting there with a bunch of fluid around it. Nuerosurgeon (chief resident who looks like he's 17, comes in and says that they want to schedule surgery on Friday morning. Okies.

So, I'm sitting here in the Neurology wing of the University of Utah hospital (which is highly regarded) worrying about these guys going to the Utah/Michigan game tonight and coming back into surgery tomorrow hungover as shit.

Bonus is, I've had two really hot nurses in a row the past two nights. Tried to convince both to give me a leisure massage and body shampoo, but they didn't go for it though I had a girl from work come by last night to visit who wanted to give me a hummer.

Anyway, I'm feeling pretty fortunate that shit went down the way it did, because I most likely would have blown it off for ever until it became really bad. (Although, I am going to ask them if it's benign if they can just keep it in there because I was digging the deja-vu bordering on omnipotence.)

Also I hear that the chief neurosurgeon is totally old school and I think I saw him sharpening his hacksaw on a rusty pipe outside and telling the nurse that she should find his favorite spoon.