A marketing contest.
 

Tommykat's thread gave me an idea for fun and games, and possibly some ridicule.

Hypothetical situation: You own a company that does marketing and advertising. That means that your job is to develop themes, messages, and advertising to sell products or services.

One of your main types of clients is interstellar tourism. With faster-than-light travel being perfected recently, more and more people are spending their vacation time on planets in other solar systems far from our own.

You get a faster-than-light phone call, and it's a Mr. Ed Johnson, who runs the tourist program for the planet Scropo-4. He wants an advertisement to run during prime time hours, along with a marketing slogan for his planet.

Here are the primary attributes of Scropo-4:

Giant three-foot spiders that can rip your arm off like it was cotton candy.

Lots of rocks, primarily of a reddish color but also some in a dull gray.

Volcanic activity that occasionally rains fist-sized rocks and chunks of red-hot lava onto the surface of the planet.

Free breakfast with a hotel stay.

Hotel rooms that are guaranteed to keep out of giant carniverous spiders, or your money back.

Your job is to come up with a concept for a television ad, as well as a marketing slogan of no more than 10 words for Scropo-4.

After the campaigns are prepared, we'll then have a poll to vote on the winning proposal.

Scropo-4: I'm not George Bush.







What? It damn near worked for John Kerry.

Who is my audience here? Seems unplausible. What's my retainer value? Is that all operational budget to propose something on a grander scale? If so, what is the budget constraints we're working behind?

So long as my team is paid up front, we'll be happy to take you on as a client. But frankly, it sounds like a risky endeavor otherwise. I just don't think there's enough market to make it worth your while, meaning we won't get paid otherwise. We'd better get that money up front.

We'll take three months retainer, and start billing progressivley, with a bonus for finishing the project on time.

*Rocky surface of Scropo-4 fades in from black*

Deep Male Voiceover: This...is Scropo-4. A land barely touched by humans.

*Cut to a colony of Scroponids (the spiders) milling around the base of a huge, smoking, inactive volcano*

Deep Male Voiceover: This...is Scropo-4. Home to the magnificent Scroponid, a creature such as no planet has ever seen.

*Cut to and pan up from the base of a huge, ACTIVE Volcano, belching fire and smoke, spewing lava and chunks of rock*

Deep Male Voiceover: This...is Scropo-4. A planet pockmarked with more breathtaking, active volcanoes per 100 square miles than the Islands of Hawaii.

*Cut to the relaxing interior of a comfortable-looking hotel, with peaceful fountains bubbling while vacationers relax, enjoying their free breakfasts*

Light Female Voiceover: This...is Scropo-4. A peaceful getaway where you can relax after an exciting day of big-game hunting and sightseeing. Enjoy the warm rays of the Scroponian Sun, completely protected from the dangers outside our state-of-the-art hotel!

*Cut to a montage of spacesuited big-game hunters going after Scroponids, tourists visiting the volcanoes (in protective transports) and relaxed-looking vacationers milling around the hotel*

*fade to black, cue end title*

SCROPO IV: AN ADVENTURE WAITS

----------------------------------------

Marketing Slogan:

Scropo-4: The Finest Adventure Our Universe Offers. Free Breakfast, Too!

If your firm can't envision the many benefits of a Scropo-4 vacation, then perhaps you aren't capable of handling the account.

Fock! We've found something he's really good at... Nice job...

damnit scorpio!

Thinking of the hotel with the guarantee, you could always go in the true art of advertising and stress that you've never had to give anyone their money back. Of course, you would be leaving out the fact that the reason you've never had to give anyone their money back was due to the fact that they were dead after being eaten alive by the three foot spiders.

Come to think of it, I had geckos in my room when I stayed in Maui. Will this spiders be in the room? That would really suck ass.

*Helicopter shot flying low over rocky planet terrain.
*Emphatic and dramatic voiceover:
"What


Is


Scropo


4?!!"

*Helicopter shot ends at hotel pool where beautiful women are dancing with the spiders to steel drum music (imagine girls gone wild or any rap/ hip hop video).
*Sexy female voiceover:
"Scropo....4 FUN!!!"

(Voice over)
Scorpo-4: Air at least three times more breathable the Scorpo-1.

A scene of a young couple walking along a gray stone beach with a impenetrable force field while red fist size volcanic rocks rain down. They stop look at each other and take a deep breath. They continue to walk repelling giant arachnids with spider repellant. While, over the horizon is a hotel sign advertising a free breakfast.

Scorpo-4 - a great place to fill up on you're way to Scorpo-9.


Unleaded - $56.79 gal
Dry rocket fuel packs - $3.75 lb
Dialythium Crystals - $7899. for a 3 pack.


Our restrooms are somewhat clean too!


C'mon in and see us! "Scorpo-4 the hotest truck stop in the solar system."

Good ideas so far...good ideas. We'll keep the contest open for another week.

This feels too much like "work" for me.