Gladiator Round 2, Match 12: guru vs. yhf
 

guru:

Spear (6 foot)

Backup weapon: Two fist-sized rocks, one of which has a slightly sharp edge

Time to prepare: 44 seconds


yhf:

A star wars light saber (his choice of color)

No backup weapon

Special Factor: You ate some really, really bad sushi the night before and are afflicted with a violent case of diarrhea

Time to prepare: 44 seconds


Venue:


USS Seawolf (SSN-21) 1,000 feet below the surface in the middle of the Pacific ocean (no sailors on board - remotely piloted). Starting distance 350 feet - 1 at bow, 1 at stern.

Diarrhea or not, light saber > spear all day, every day.

The diarrhea will just make him mad.

Yhf is looking like the darkhorse to win this whole thing.

/jinx

I think guru's best hope is to hide, throw the rocks in a way that will make yhf look toward them, and then guru can spear him in the back. Other than that, he could be in trouble.

However, I should note that in Revenge of the Jedi, the ewoks used spears and rocks to take out a whole division of Imperial troops, so victory is indeed not only possible, but on record as having happened.

LIGHTSABER!?! Why not just give him a remote to a bomb in Guru's heart. This thing is no contest. The only possible wrinkle would be the close quarters. It would give yhf an edge over the spear (as if he needed it) but he might slip up and effortlessly slice through the hull of the ship killing them both and resulting in a draw. Since that's not an option, the choice is easy.

It was more the home terrain and everconfidence that did the empire in there. One Ewok on one random guy with a lightsaber would still be ****ed.

Looks like yhf will be facing me in the Gurkha division championship!

Emperor Rain Man.. any idea when Round 3 starts? tomorrow?

We still have four more Round 2 matches, so it'll probably be a couple of days.

Just needed to know when to get my stretching in... ok I'll be ready for battle Wednesday!

ROFL The shitting his pants alone is good for some extra votes.

I have something else planned when this is done. I think you'll enjoy it if you like this.

I'd also like to point out that a Sunday finale would be perfect... especially if I am in it... with Sunday being my birthday and all... just saying...

yhf won't do shit while he's shitting.

Vote Guru.