SNR's Pipedream Chiefs Mock 04/22 (Now with more trade down!)
 

John Dorsey was on the phone with Carl about potential cheap vacation spots that would be ideal for next year's free agency season, and when he wasn't looking Brandin Cooks and Odell Beckham were snatched away.

He consults his board to pick the best fatty available when he gets a call from the 49ers. They want the spot to jump up and draft Kony Ealy. Chiefs would also really like to have him, so some hardball is played when Dorsey actually finds a spine to negotiate with the 49ers for once. A pretty decent offer is reached.

Chiefs give up 1.23
49ers give up 1.30, 2.56, and 2.61

A deal is made.

Here's what the Chiefs do with those picks:

Disclaimer: This is my pipedream mock. I don't want to hear shit about how this player will never be available when we pick or how that player is overrated. None of this is realistic anyway, because this is going to be the most unpredictable and crazy draft from start to finish that we've seen in a long time. There are a ton of good players that are going to fall into jaw-droppingly late rounds, and there are a ton of questionable players that are going to get taken earlier than they should because NFL GMs are weird and dumb. So... yeah. That's it.

1.30- Kyle Van Noy, OLB/ILB, BYU: Potentially would be Derrick Johnson's replacement, but in the meantime, the Chiefs love what a diverse skillset Van Noy brings. He's unlike anything on the roster currently. What makes this great is even if Houston and Hali stay healthy the entire season, the Chiefs will almost certainly find ways to get Van Noy on the field, including at the inside spot next to DJ on passing downs. He's not the talent that Ealy is, but the Chiefs sacrifice the slight drop in talent for a player with a higher floor and just as much attitude and value as a tool to keep this defense ferocious all season.

2.56- Cody Latimer, WR, Indiana: The Alex pick comes home where it belongs. Latimer is a receiver that probably won't even be available at this pick; there are talks of him jumping up into the 1st round perhaps. If that is the case, look for a player like Jordan Matthews or Donte Moncrief to get targeted by the Chiefs. Ideally ONE of these players would fall to us, but that's part of what makes this a pipedream mock.

2.61- Gabe Jackson, OG, Mississippi State: The Chiefs see a player they possibly considered selecting with their first rounder, if you believe Saccopoo's prognostications at all. Hopefully fix this annoying constant ****ing around with the offensive line for good or until we need to draft another MAC conference LT because we're too ****ing cheap. It also leaves room for an epic training camp battle of fatties... if you're into that sort of thing. Rishaw Johnson's claim of the RG spot isn't necessarily out yet, either. It leaves room for Jackson to push Allen. In any case, I think this pick does an incredible job sealing any doubt about Alex's safety for awhile.

3.87- Jared Abbrederis, WR, Wisconsin: I'll say one thing about McCluster-- in 2013 the dude was pretty steady and reliable as a 3rd down short-midrange possession receiver. What the Chiefs get with Abbrederis is that same consistent option. The potential for growth into something bigger is somewhat low, but the Chiefs don't particularly need that in this pick, necessarily. Also gives us a pretty good kick returner; he definitely has the speed to breakaway once Toub pops open a hole for him to shoot through.

4.124- Charles Sims, RB, West Virginia: When Miles Crane got dinged up in Indy, our running game was never the same with Cyrus. Time to move on from him. I see a lot of Jamaal Charles in Sims. He's perhaps not as tough or electric, but he'll do the things we need him to do if the worst happens. Always gotta keep this position stocked with young talent. Sims is my 2nd or 3rd favorite RB in this draft, so I'm good with taking him this high

5.163- Matt Patchan, OT, Boston College: I've already talked at length all about why I really like Patchan, and there's no reason to think his presence wouldn't be needed. I mean, behind Fisher and Stephenson we have... yeah, right? Also, it's around the 5th or 6th round that I'm comfortable finding swing guys and backups. Any higher and... yeah. Blech.

6.193- Ty Zimmerman, FS, Kansas State Spe-cial tee-eams CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP. It's really looking like I'm stealing a bunch of Saccopoo picks, but I swear I'm doing my own homework on this stuff. I like Zimmerman better than a lot of guys like Huff, Ladler, and Boston who will probably get taken before Zimmerman, who gets my nod for the instant special teams contribution he'll be able to make and his ability to not Kendrick Lewis a RB at the edge and let him run free for 30 goddamn yards. Zimmerman is more reliable of a tackler and better at diagnosing route development, but he lacks speed. That's why I'm comfortable keeping him around for depth. He'd be our 5th safety most likely if we keep 5 (Berry and Abdullah starters, Commings and McMillan as primary backups).

6.200- Aaron Lynch, DE/OLB, USF: I have no clue how this guy fits into a 3-4, nor do I care. I also am aware that the Bengals are probably going to draft this guy way earlier than he deserves to go, but nobody can ever say for sure when it comes to an insanely deep draft such as this at this point late in the game. Character concern guy... looks too tall and bumbling to play standup rushbacker, but God, he can rape some bitches when it's on. Worry about what he'll do on the line or off of it later-- instead concentrate on tapping into what made him so incredible of a player his first year at Notre Dame and the last half of the season at USF.

Whatever you're burnin in that pipedream of yours, might be illegal even in Colorado

but I do like it...

Who's the odd men out in the WR group?

Bowe
Avery
Latimer
Abbrederis
Jenkins
Williams
Hemingway


I would assume it would look like this: Bowe, Latimer, Avery, Abbrederis and Jenkins?

Yeah, I got a bit carried away there, admittedly. Adding Abbrederis alone just doesn't do much to improve the group we've got, though.

Ideally we'd be cutting Avery to save some money, but that may be a little risky if Latimer or Jenkins don't step up into that vacancy we'd be creating.

Bleh, swap out:

Van Noy -> Jimmie Ward or Attaochu

Latimer -> Matthews or Moncrief

Abbrederis -> Jaylen Watkins

Sims -> Zach Kerr or Justin Ellis

Lynch -> Anyone else that actually gives two sh*ts about football

No.

I mentioned in the description that those two guys are also possibilities. It all depends on who's available. Any one of those three would be great fits for this offense.

Oh God **** no. :shake:

Maybe. I don't think that's in line with what the Chiefs are trying to accomplish at backup NT. It seems that by signing Grissom, they're just looking for a Powe, not a guy who can really spell Poe. I disagree with that move, but I can't control it. If they're going to do what I think they're doing, then I'd rather they go to a player like Sims than some of the other positions they could tap into. But fair point, and I'd absolutely be happy if they really did draft a two-down NT type of guy to reduce Poe's snaps

No.

Love the trade down.

The picks are a solid B+.

Why so much love for Van Noy?

Sure he's instinctive, but a lot of other players are too. Fact of the matter is though, he's a physically limited player with tiny arms and not much upside as a 3-4 rush LB. He's not a physically dominant player, lacks power, and isn't particularly fast or explosive. He's essentially the Chris Borland of the OLBs in this draft class.

Because I think he would shift inside. At least for awhile. His physical limitations aren't as drastic as you think, and he would excel at generating a passrush up the middle in certain situations.

I don't mind Attaochu at all. I'd love the pick, really. But he's going to need more time to adjust into the rushbacker role. Van Noy gives us options right now on the roster that wouldn't be available otherwise with Joe Mays as the stiff guy next to DJ who can't make plays in the passing game.

But no to Jimmie Ward. Honestly, I have no clue what people see in him as a 1st round selection, much less as a guy who can be fantastic in single high coverage (which is what we need). Ward is a SS, and I don't see the Chiefs moving Berry back. It's just not going to happen.

So you see Van Noy as our equivalent of Daryl Washington to be paired with Johnson (Dansby)? Washington has 34 1/2" long arms and 4.6 speed and is an even more instinctive and athletic player.

As for Jimmie Ward, he's probably the most versatile safety in this draft. He can play single high as well as anyone, he can drop down into the box and stop the run, and he has the athletic ability to match up 1 on 1 with the slot receiver in man coverage. IMO, he's the best safety in this draft class, just doesn't quite have the size that some of the other prospects have. (He's 5' 10 1/2" tall and 193 pounds.)

You, sir, are a genius.

Being a bit greedy with 1 2nd round pick, let alone 2.

Van Noy has a remarkable knack for being able to follow a play, find a hole in the line and knife through it exactly when he needs to. He always takes the right step, the right path to the ball carrier or play. And when he gets there, his tackling is absolutely perfect. He uses a number of moves in getting to the QB in pass rushing, and he's got exceptional feet, hips and hands in coverage. He is the most fluid player in this draft by far.

His versatility allows him to play all four linebacker positions as well as special teams, where he's made a habit of getting into the kicker/punter and getting his hands on the ball. He's a four down player.

As well, he's a vocal and emotional leader on the field and in the locker room. This defense needs a guy like that.

No, his raw data numbers don't blow you away the way someone like Clowney's does, but he's the sum of all the parts. His instincts and immeasurables (feet/hips/hands/steps) make him very fast on the field and allow him to play sideline to sideline, front to back.

He's as good a pick for this defense as there is in the draft.

Wow Pest, if you can do that kind of rape job to the 9ers for our 23rd pick, I vote you new assistant GM in charge of trades....

The realistic trade value for #23 if dropping down to #30 is that we'll also receive #94 (R3) and #170 (R5). That is a far cry from two 2nd round picks.


Edit: As a reference.... Last year the trade from 22 to 30 netted #92 and #198.

he stated from the start he was high, smoking the (crack)pipedream, why you such a buzz kill? give him the day, let him wake up in the morning and realize what he's done, it'll be much more enjoyable tomorrow to lolz at him

:)