Gladiator 2018 - Round 4, Match 2 - Sofa King versus kysirsoze
 

We're down to the Elite Eight - the toughest and/or luckiest warriors on the planet.

Vote for the person that you think would win this match in a battle to death or submission. As background, assume that prior to the tournament you received 10 minutes of training on every weapon. The time listed is the amount of time before the match where you learn what the weaponry and venue is. All participants are handed their weapons at t=0 unless stated otherwise.

Venue - A penguin rookery in Antarctica
Starting Distance - 44 feet

Sofa King

Main Weapon - Pepper spray
Backup Weapon - Bo Staff

Prep Time - 6 seconds
Special Factors - None

kysirsoze

Main Weapon - Brass knuckles with big blades that look like bear claws (both hands)
Backup Weapon - Police baton

Prep Time - 11 Minutes
Special Factors - None

If he lets loose with that pepper spray, those penguins will do my job for me. They won't need to though, because spray or no, I'm basically Wolverine vs a guy with a stick. This is a bloody one.

How many shots of pepper spray does one of those dispensers hold, anyway?

Um...

I can't imagine it's very many...

Brass knuckles won’t fit over gloves and wearing brass knuckles on bare skin in Antarctica is going to be excruciatingly painful. Pepper spray to the face and beat to death with the bow staff is how I see it.

Sofa has to either use pepper spray or bo stick. Won't work to try both.

I'm betting Sofa goes with pepper spray. The problem is pepper spray is usually best having some element of surprise, which Sofa won't have. All Kysir has to do is block the spray with one hand while slashing with the other.

If Sofa goes the other route and tries bo stick it is probably a better fight. But going to have to give the edge to a sharp weapon that only has to get one good shot in to kill. Kysir wins.

Interesting. I hadn't thought of the glove angle.

If I could only have one set of weapons, I think I'd take the pepper spray. The bear claws would be terrifying to face, but one must be able to see one's opponent.

This is how i see it as well. Plus I'll blend in well if i wear my tuxedo coveralls.

In all seriousness, Pepperspray followed up with the Bo staff and it's all over. He's going to have a hell of a time on ice, while blind, with claws stuck to his hands and while getting the shit kicked out of his with a Bo staff.

You're a good opponent, you just got a bad draw.

Brass Knuckles WILL fit over thin gloves. Spent a lot of time in a frozen tundra, myself & have seen it. BIG blades from 1 hand will at least block, if not slice through, the Bo Staff. Other bear claw knuckles, which are huge, block the pepper spray, which will also have to contend with the Antarctic winds for aiming. This is all if Sofa tried to use both at once, which also diminishes impact of Bo Staff. If it were just baton vs. Bo Staff, I'd give it to the "reach" but the BIG sharp blades take away that advantage. Kysir will kill Sofa before he even gets to whatever weapon he grabs second.

This is a top-notch first post. As administrator of the tournament, I'll let you take whatever is in the pockets of the loser of this match.

Are we going to allow abvious mults to post in polls now? This one literally created the account shortly after the thread was created.

Come on Kysirsoze.... cheap way to try to get more votes

You’ve seen someone wear brass knuckles over thin gloves in a frozen environment? It’s not good to start your CP posting career with an obvious lie.

NFL fan since childhood. Chiefs Fan since 1995. Although not on here, suffered with the rest of you through Lin Elliot, Broncos with Crisco on jerseys in home playoffs, Greg Robinson, & numerous leftover San Fran QB's. Celebrated Marty in spite of flaws, Eric Berry coming back from the big C, was present for breaking the sound record in Arrowhead both times, and am juiced about Mahomes! Hearing about Chiefs Planet for decades from guys I go to games with in different states. Was in Minnesota end of July and heard about the epic gladiator tourney. Finally thought it was too intriguing & fun to miss (well done, Rain Man), so I got on, had to be in first few days of Aug. Have voted for a few matches already. Dismiss me again, Sofa, and you'll be missing more than what's left in your pockets.

Also, Lone Wolf, 85 degrees BELOW 0 for 3 days straight classifies as tundra in my book and although weird, yes, saw a guy try brass knuckles on at a party outside without taking off his gloves. If you knew me, you'd know - I don't even tell little white lies to make people feel better. Gets me in trouble some, but people know where I stand.