[Sully]

I had a buddy (still do) who, though very smart, was a total screwup through high school and college. He was constantly high, his mom always did his homework, wrote his papers, etc. Guy now makes a VERY nice.living building airplanes, and contracting for the air force.
I was pissed about it for years. Why did he get all the breaks, when I'm just as smart? My mom doesn't do my homework! Comparing his treatment with mine, in no small way, was a real hindrance to me.
In your writing, you sure compare yourself with others a ton. I wonder if you were able to forget and stop worrying about that angle, if it would help your outlook.