['Hamas' Jenkins]

Overall, I'm thinking this should be a good time for me to tap out of caring about sports.

It's a huge investment of time and emotional energy for a constant supply of anxiety, disappointment, and misery.

I said it when the Cardinals won the 2011 World Series, but I was too stupid to follow my own advice. It would never get better than that.

Since then, by rooting interests have been nothing but an unending series of disasters and tragedies. Deaths, injuries, murders, choke jobs, and collapses.

The Cardinals lost their best position prospect in 15 years to a ****ing drunk driving accident, blew a 3-1 lead in the NLCS to a shit team, lost to a Red Sox team (again) that sandwiched that title around last place finishes, and got totally surpassed by the ****ing Cubs. Meanwhile, every team since 2013 has gotten progressively worse.

Mizzou basketball cobbled together one inspired season from a group of jilted seniors, only to suffer the most embarrassing loss in the history of the program to the worst team that has ever won an NCAA tournament game, which they then followed up with a scandal only to then hire the worst coach arguably in Power 5 history. And when they finally do turn it around (it appears) the best player they've ever had, they best player they'll EVER have, a hometown kid with stellar character, blows out his back after two minutes.

And Mizzou football is perhaps the one to be most optimistic about, when the ceiling for the next half decade is probably second best team in a bad division.

But hey, maybe Drew Lock will stay around for his senior year and get drafted by the Browns so that they can ruin him. Or maybe he and Beckner will both declare and a ****ing asteroid will hit the training facility during their pro days so that they can be robbed of success at the next level, too.