[Rain Man]

I hate to say this, but I dislike Ray Lewis more for his ego and his stupid seizure dances than I do for the murder. Terrell Owens shakes his head in disbelief at Ray Lewis' ego.

Jeepers, in looking at the list of finalists, they apparently awarded bonus points for not being a team player.

Here's my ranking of the finalists, from most deserving to least.

Category 1. Guys that deserve it and I'll clap enthusiastically.

1 Everson Walls, DB - If you like good cornerback play, watch this guy. Smoothest CB ever.

2 Joe Jacoby, OT - He's the only Redskins OL who deserves it, but for some reason they put one of the guards in and left Joe out. He was the best O-lineman in the league for years, and at the LT position to boot.

3 Randy Moss, WR - I'll always remember him jogging routes in Oakland, which I hate even though it's Oakland. But let's get real - a pouty, slouching, sullen Randy Moss is still probably the best WR to ever play the game.

4 Brian Urlacher, LB - He was a pretty amazing MLB in his day. He made that defense, and it was a good defense.

Category 2. Bleah. But he kind of deserves it.

5 Terrell Owens, WR - His stats make him a no-brainer. But I contend that he made the players around him worse. He deserves to get put in because on the field he was dominant for a long time, but off the field he was a terrible teammate.

Category 3. Meh. I won't argue if these guys get in. But make their bust half-size.

6 Isaac Bruce, WR - A great wide receiver. Not as good as Otis Taylor, but really good.

7 Steve Hutchinson, OG - He's not Will Shields, but I've got no issue with him. Ed Budde should go in first, though.

8 Edgerrin James, RB - I know he was talented and built a lot of stats, but tell me the most electrifying plays you remember from him. He's remembered mostly for replacing Marshall Faulk.

9 Tony Boselli, OT - I seem to remember him playing well before he would get hurt in every game.

Category 4. Overrated guys who don't deserve to get in.

10 John Lynch, S - He hit hard, I'll give him that. He might sneak up into the next group in a really weak year.

11 Ray Lewis, LB - Even if you set aside the MURDER, he's massively unlikable. If I was a player on his team, I would have eventually stabbed him just to stop the bragging and the stupid, stupid dance. Seriously, that dance was embarrassing. The commissioner should have fined him and suspended him, because it made the league look bad. And if he goes in, he'd darn well better pick his dry cleaner to introduce him, because he owes his career to that person.

12 Brian Dawkins, S - NFC East safety. Maybe he was good, but I have no way of knowing.

13 Alen Faneca, OG - Screw the Steelers and their offensive line holding and CTE car chases.

Category 5. I don't get it. Are these typos or something?

14 Ty Law, CB - (Shrug.)

15 Kevin Mawae, C - Did you ever fear a Mawae-led offensive attack?